TITLE: What Happens Here Stays Here

RATING: PG-13

PAIRING: Harm and Mac

DISCLAIMER: I do not own JAG.

Author's Note: Wow, I did it. I wrote this section at work during my breaks. Anyway, I wanted to post this because I won't be able to post again for at least another week. This is kind of like the end of the first section of my story, and soon I will be moving into the next part. I hope you all have enjoyed this, and thank you so much for the reviews!!!! Thanks for reading!!! Reviews Welcome!!! Enjoy!!!

Chapter Title: Stories of Fate

Harm and Mac's Room
Caesar's Palace
0100 MST

Mac couldn't tell what caused her worries to melt away so quickly on this night. Maybe the atmosphere at the moment, the soothing massage of the jets in the Jacuzzi and the calm, soft glow from the many candles nestled all around, effectively pushed all problems from her mind, if only for this weekend. Yet the arms encircling her, the body she leaned back against, the warmth emanating from the person behind, seemed to be the source for the peace in her heart. No matter what problems, as long as Harm was with her, the peace would always exist, always make her troubles seem small and minute. It was exactly where she wanted to be.

A soft kiss touched upon Mac's bare shoulder. Tracing the features and curves of Harm's hands, a voice whispered in her ear, "What I want to know is how we ended up in water again." Amusement in the moment did not take away from the intimacy shared on this night, only adding to the journey of their souls. Nothing could damage this night, nothing could hurt what was shared, exchanged, and what was to come. The time already spent together during the weekend, specifically this night, effectively cancelled out the previous weeks' loneliness and separation from each other.

Giggling softly, Mac whispered in return, "I don't know, I think the water's pretty comfortable." Snuggling back against him further to press her opinion, Harm smiled as he wrapped his arms around her tighter. He knew he would never love a woman like this ever again. Everything in his life came back to this point, to this woman, and all that she did for him and what he risked for her. So much of his life felt wasted on other relationships and experiences, yet he knew without the course taken he would never feel so complete in this moment.

Harm placed a kiss on the side of her neck and again her shoulder, feeling a combination of water and soft skin, yet strength and love. Difficult not to think of their future in that moment, Harm saw their living room, the fireplace spreading warmth throughout the home and their hearts, perhaps a Christmas tree glowing in the corner while their children opened their Christmas morning presents. Was he really seeing this? Is this what he wanted? More than anything? More than life itself? Harm said softly against her shoulder, "You're comfortable."

Mac turned her head back to glance at him then, seeing the smile growing with each second she allowed her eyes to bore into his handsome features. In that moment, Mac noted the amount of instances she saw that wonderful smile since they started their relationship. Actually, she needed to admit her own giddiness and joy with advancing on such a road, taking on such a challenge. Sure they were different in many ways, yet they were the same, wanted the same thing, couldn't keep their attraction bottled up any further. Opposites most certainly attract, Mac reminded herself. Matching his smile, she chided softly, "What else do you want from me?"

Harm just couldn't hide his growing smile, every second he enjoyed the presence of this woman, replying softly, "Nothing." He didn't want anything, nothing at all, except her as he bent down to capture her lips, the desire burning inside of him. In fact, Mac surprised him slightly by deepening the kiss quite a bit, settling a hand behind his neck as she pulled him even closer to her. If anything, she certainly knew how to turn him into a pool of incomprehension, the passion growing quickly.

Slowing the kiss down a bit, Mac traced her lips to his upper lip, then his cheek, his heart begin to speed up ever so slightly. Yet Harm knew this drill quite well, remembering Mac's tendency to seduce him ever so slightly to get him to do something for her. It was the same every time, and every time Harm fell for it. Not because Mac tricked him, but because Mac was everything to him. Because he would do anything for her. Smiling against the cheek pressed lovingly against his, only hearing the quite hum of the jets in the water and their own breathing, Harm asked, stressing Mac's own words, "What else do you want from me?"

Mac pulled away slightly, realizing Harm's gaining knowledge of her, knowing he couldn't hide much from this man. He didn't know all of her secrets, but he did know quite a bit. Meeting his eyes with her own, she replied honestly, "Truth."

Confusion evident, Harm countered with confidence and love, "You already have that." He truthfully did not have a clue what she was referring to, thinking that Mac knew so much more about him than any other woman in his life to this point. Perhaps his mother knew more, yet Harm didn't think so. So much he kept to himself, underneath layers upon layers of protection, sadness, and worry. A night such as this one initially broke down such barriers, though he didn't feel there were many secrets left.

Mac moved away from him then to the other side of the Jacuzzi, facing him head on. The movement indicated her need to be serious in this moment, during this conversation. Harm was everything to her, and every worry, every sadness, every experience in his life became important the day she said she loved him. The day she even thought those words. If forced to name that moment, Mac would quickly remember the night at Sydney Harbor. She never stopped loving him since that moment, that time in their lives, no matter her engagements or other love interests. "I want you to tell me about your crash."

Harm's smile faded a little as he gazed down at the popping bubbles created by the jets underneath, stretching his arms out a little across the top of the Jacuzzi. He did promise her he would tell her of his experience, what he went through. Her reasons for pressing so still evaded him, however. "Why?" he asked subtly, not wanting to sound annoyed, but needing to emphasize his own curiosity. If she really wanted to know, he would tell her. He knew that time in his life changed him quite a bit, and he was sure she sensed that change at that time. However, though Mac survived a broken engagement, and Harm survived his crash, that time remained closed off to both. However, Mac's own biggest change did not take place in that time period, yet in another.

Moving up beside him, taking a hand in hers, she explained, "Because you went through quite a bit, and I want to understand that time in your life better." They came minutes from talking to one another seriously about a possible relationship after Mic left her, how upset she was, how close they came to something greater than themselves. Yet, at that time, it was not meant to be. So much so that talking about his crash and Mac's heartbreak was rarely brought up in any future conversations. Now Mac felt responsible for every mood, every source of joy and sadness in Harm's life, as if knowing him completely included having a window to every inch of his past, mainly so she understood the transformation, how he became the man before her.

The concept easy to understand, especially when Harm felt such a need himself concerning Mac, he sighed slightly, thinking of a place to start. Immediately his mind returned to that point in his life, the fear rising in him as he began to lose control of his plane. Knowing it was not his fault didn't help Harm feel any less guilty, risking his RIO's life because of his need to get back for a friend's wedding. He never spoke much of the guilt, or the fear of losing his life. More importantly, he never spoke of almost losing that chance of spending the rest of his life with the person he loved most in the world. His mind whirled frantically while in the water, while he barely remained conscious, his possible last thoughts ever in this life settling on the face that gave him the inner calm and peace. Giving him breath.

Squeezing her hand in his, her eyes comforting and understanding, inviting, Harm began, "I just finished my night traps, and I requested to leave the carrier ASAP. I remember talking with the Captain and the CAG, hoping the weather would break enough for me to slip through."

Soon the events of that day flashed across his mind, remembering the scene vaguely, only knowing it occurred. Such memories brought back many feelings, mostly fear, worry, and anxiety. Ironically, none of those ill feelings involved a destined flight through bad weather, rather the destination and what he would have to face alone. Despite any attempts to move past that lifeline, he would be forced to watch the woman of his dreams marry away. Yet being her friend and giving her support was top priority, no matter his feelings.

-----------------------------------

"What's so important that it can't wait?"

"Colonel Mackenzie's wedding."

"Are you the best man?"

"No."

"Then why rush?"

"I need to be there."

---------------------------

Mac listened intently to the descriptions and recollections of a time long forgotten by both. Obviously she felt guilt in that time, and once again the guilt returned as she recalled the events. Knowing he risked his life just to arrive in time to watch her marry another person, despite the obvious feelings and attraction between them, only increased the guilt. Having pressured him the day before he left, making him feel horrible for leaving her, her best friend, right before the most important day of her life only increased his need to be there for her. Such events turned out conclusions that, gazed upon in hindsight, were the best for everyone. Yet the guilt remained.

Harm held onto Mac's hand tightly as he spoke, tracing his thumb across each knuckle as he continued, "I really wanted to be there for you. I felt bad with the way I acted."

"I certainly wasn't nice to you, either," Mac recalled, feeling more guilt.

Harm let his mind wander back again, trying to remember the next scene in the complicated story. He knew he would never remember everything, so much of it a big blur. Losing his memory temporarily only made the situation much more difficult. Ye he knew he needed to continue, to recall what h did remember, to share with Mac everything he could. Having her know so much about him was a privilege, above all else. Something he never tired of. "We got ready to fly, and once we began to leave, the weather became somewhat worse. I remember Skates shouting numbers to me, calling Andrews, the carrier, seeing the dark clouds, the torrential rains outside the cockpit. I have to admit, the worse the weather, the more worried I became of our chances of surviving."

Rubbing his hand between the two of hers, wishing desperately she could kiss away all his troubles, she decided instead to encourage him to continue, whispering, "What happened next?" The need for him to share the experience began to grow, and the need for Mac to hear it would not leave her heart.

Taking another small pause, Harm continued, "I remember both Skates and I knew we had to punch out. No matter how good of a pilot I may be, there was no way I could pilot through that storm, especially when we lost power. The next thing I remember is hitting the water, struggling for air, trying to fight off all of the waves." Suddenly Harm paused again, his face turning quite serious, his eyes displaying fear and sorrow, weakness.

Looking to Mac, seeing the concern and love never leaving her face, knowing he could share anything with her, he began again, "I had two things on my mind as I waited, thinking I might die. I wished I did more with my life, but ...". Matching Mac's gaze upon him, he caressed her face with his hand, feeling the emotion rising in him like a volcano. "Dying without seeing your face again, without telling you how I felt hurt the most. I was so scared that I would lose this," he explained further, indicating their current situation, "... this life with you, the chance to be with you."

Mac covered the hand caressing her face with her own, allowing their eyes to swim in each other's souls. All the emotion that overtook Harm in that moment spilled over into her own heart. She felt it now, Harm's fear of dying in the ocean, all alone, the fear of losing her forever. That was why he kept it to himself, specifically from Renee, as well as Mac herself, after just dealing with Mic's recent departure. He needed time just as she did after the life-changing events, and since then, rarely did they even think of it.

Clasping his hand, she whispered, with tears fill her eyes quickly, "Well, you'll always have me now, sailor." Harm finally smiled, realizing everything each suffered for the other, what they risked, the time lost because of their own fear, of unknown circumstances. At the moment, however, they controlled their own destiny, and Harm took no time moving to kiss her. The passion captured them quickly.

Harm and Mac's room
Caesar's Palace
0200 MST

Lying in bed, Mac laughed quietly as she felt the lazy kisses creating shapes along her stomach. The kisses were soft to her skin, causing a tickling sensation to spread across her entire body. They were together long enough to know what spots to kiss, caress, and soothe to comfort the other. Mac knew Harm loved kisses along his jaw line, his heart always beating just a bit faster every time she kissed him there. Just as Mac enjoyed kisses to her neck, Harm loved Mac's massages.

Giggling again, Mac whispered playfully, "Are you trying to seduce a Lieutenant Colonel of the Marine Corp.?"

Harm laughed lightly, blowing on the skin he just kissed, causing Mac to quickly fall into a lull of complete comfort and peace. If anything, Harm knew how to release all of her stress, whether be bout flowers, gave her a back rub, or trailed kisses along her stomach, Mac mused. Soon he shifted up, lying on top of her completely. His eyes gazed upon her face, his arms encircling her waist. "I like seducing you. Especially ..." he began, pressing his body strongly against hers, "... when you can't escape."

Mac would be lying if she said she did not enjoy the playfulness, the fun evident in their relationship. Just enjoying the time together seemed to bring out such silliness, often leading to a night of passion. Many nights started just like this, and Mac could barely keep the smile off of her face as she remembered all they shared during such moments. Giving him a small kiss, her lips inches from his, her hands tracing along his shoulders, she joked, "What do I have to do to get out?"

Harm smiled at first, knowing very well if Mac wanted to escape she could do so in two seconds. Yet playing along, Harm suddenly felt the opportunity arise to ask the question he wanted to for such a long time. After he confided in Mac concerning his crash, he felt the need to hear about Paraguay. He was there some of the experience, much of it he preferred to forget, yet he was curious about Mac's ability to survive, how ti changed her so deeply. "Tell me about Paraguay."

At first Mac was unsure of what he meant, only remembering the countless arguments they engaged in once Harm arrived on the scene to save her and Webb. She knew the source of his anger at that time, though certain they talked about the issues stemming from Paraguay a million times before. In fact, as they began their current relationship they ensured all ill feelings concerning that difficult time were solved. Now Harm's request seemed strange, out of place. "You already know about Paraguay," she whispered, kissing him gently on his chin.

Harm nodded slightly, yet added, "But I don't know everything you went through. I just kept having scary visions that you were going to die while you were gone."

"You never told me that," Mac pointed out, not angry, just surprised there were still some moments in their lives they kept secret.

Burying his face in her neck, leaving kisses there, he whispered, "I missed everything before I got there, and I wanted to hear the story." He kissed a small behind her ear, knowing his love for this woman increased with every second he was in her presence, lying in her arms, safe from the world. It gave him goose bumps just thinking about spending the rest of his life with this wonderful woman.

Mac felt the sincerity in his words, in his kisses, knowing his need to know everything about her was a s strong as her own need to know everything about him. Honestly, she rarely thought of that in her life, choosing to leave it behind her as much as she could. It took her months to get straight, to get past all that happened, and if Harm was ever to understand her on such a deep level he needed to know of that time in her life. It was essential. "Okay," she whispered, feeling a kiss to her cheek, "I'll tell you." She ran her hands through his hair, seeing him pull away slightly to gaze at her.

Harm nestled his head between her shoulder and neck, wrapping his arms around her as she continued lazily running her fingers through his short hair. Immediately her mind shifted to that time, a section of her life long forgotten, but not lost. The pause she took as she searched for the words to describe her experience, Harm whispered, "If you don't want to, I understand."

All Mac could feel was the overwhelming warmth coming from Harm, and not just because they were snuggled so intimately together. With the warmth came confidence. "No, you should know." Pausing slightly, she continued, "We arrived in Paraguay ...". Soon the images flashed across her mind like a motion picture as she explained their first meeting with the terrorists and drug dealers. Much of it went on without a hitch. "We sent Gunny to follow the terrorists to their hideout, to ensure the bomb would hit the correct spot. However, when he used his cell phone, they immediately realized who he was."

Harm lifted up slightly to gaze at her, seeing the point where everything went completely downhill. There would be no question of Mac's willingness to risk her life for her friends, especially a fellow Marine. It would not be difficult to predict the next few events in this story. "You weren't going to leave him behind."

Mac nodded as Harm lowered his head back down, his cheek against her shoulder. "No, I couldn't. That was why we were captured, and then Gunny escaped. They put us in a room for a while, but soon came and took Clay, tortured him in a building a little farther away. I can still hear his screams." Her heart sank thinking of it all again, Clay suffering this torture so she didn't have to. Even now it was almost too much to accept and suddenly his face drifted before her eyes. Hardly thinking of him recently, now she couldn't push Clay out of her thoughts, remembering everything they survived together.

Harm sensed the pause in her voice the moment she spoke of Webb's sacrifice for her, what he risked, what was lost when he didn't return from his last mission. It didn't take long for Harm to wonder what would have happened if Webb did come back, safe and sound. Most likely Harm would not be here right now, lying in bed with the woman he loved, with the woman he risked his life for a dozen times. Better yet, what if he didn't crash in the Atlantic? Would he be second place to Mac then? The alternate?

Glancing up into the eyes that now drifted off slightly, he whispered with sincerity, "I'm sorry you lost Webb."

Mac immediately broke out of her thoughts, surprised and touched by Harm's sentiments. For Harm to say something like that with such honesty would be difficult, especially considering his dislike of her relationship with Clay. Caressing his cheek and giving him a sweet kiss, she replied softly, "I love you."

Surprising Mac, Harm pushed himself up out of her arms to lie beside her on his back. He couldn't push away the thoughts of never being in this place, in this time, if Webb didn't perish. Though her words were meant to comfort him, Harm felt second place when compared with Webb, and even Brumby, for that matter. Only mere chances, bad luck in both of their lives, allowed for the two of them to be together. Everyone else was gone. "Would you still love me if Webb was alive?" Harm asked quietly, needing to say it, to release it.

Feeling her heart sink deeper, knowing exactly where Harm was taking the conversation, she honestly didn't know the words to comfort him. Yet she needed to say something, to reassure him not of her love in the situation he presented, but of her love for him now. The love that wouldn't fail or go away. The love that would always exist. Flipping to her side slowly, she leaned over him, seeing his eyes waiting for an answer. "I've always loved you. That hasn't changed, and it never will. Would we be in a relationship if Webb were still alive? I don't know. We've risked our lives so many times for each other," Mac explained softly, settling next to him, her fingertips grazing across his upper shoulder. "Both of us came close to dying so many times, quite a few instances together, yet we survived. Anything, any change in our lives to this point could habce changed this outcome, lessened the chances of us being together, but ..." she trailed off, suddenly feel the words bubbling to her heart as Harm kept his eyes upon her.

Pulling him so they were facing each other, she caressed his face, whispering, "Fate brought us to this point." Taking a hand in hers, she entwined their fingers while she settled her other hand on his heart. A constant rhythm met her palm, the only sound that gave her peace. "It doesn't matter what happened in the past, just like dwelling on 'what if's' gets us nowhere. All I know is that ..." Mac paused, suddenly feeling the power and emotion of the moment, what was to be revealed as she continued, squeezing his hand, "... you're my soul mate, Harmon Rabb. We were meant to be. With you, I'm complete."

Harm felt the emotion begin to rise in his throat, every word, every tear that began to fall, breathing life into his lungs as if for the first time. Leaning his forehead against hers, realizing then that despite everything, they had each other now. Nothing would stop them from being together. Never did he feel like this with any other woman, the love that rooted so deep in his soul. Only then did he notice they were both tearing up, and he laughed slightly, feeling her snuggle closer to him. "Fate brought me to you. You make me a complete man, Sarah Mackenzie. Soul mate."

They kissed passionately, all emotion falling into this one kiss, into this one night. Harm was now convinced he wanted to be with no other woman than Sarah Mackenzie. Only she made him the man he wanted to be, the man he was meant to be. How they got to this point didn't matter, the what- ifs meant nothing. All that mattered now was their love, it's infinite existence, and how it brought them together through all barriers. Harm thought of nothing else as the lights of Las Vegas shined brightly through the dark room, his entire being swallowed by her grace and love.

Mac knew now they were one, something deep inside releasing them to the next step. Soon she felt kisses on her neck, her shoulder, as she wrapped her arms around to his back. Staying in his arms forever would be her wish, if such a request could be fulfilled. Moving her hands to his chest, then to his arms, pulling him closer to her, being with him, making love to him meant more than just passion and desire. It meant so much more, feeling Harm's reach her own. Their souls were now linked.

McCarren Airport
Las Vegas
Monday – 0200 MST

Just you and I

Why Harm scheduled their departure flight so late at night, Mac would never know. Of course rain delayed the plane quite a bit, and again they were forced to wait an hour or so before the skies and the runway were safe. Sitting in the terminal alone, Mac tried to read the book in her lap, yet the voice announcing boarding and arrivals, on top of the bustling people in that section of the airport, prevented her from diving into the story. Yet the images truly on her mind concerned a certain Commander in the Navy, hardly able to keep her mind off of him after such an extraordinary weekend. Why did it have to end?

Sharing out love together

"Coffee?" Harm asked, sitting down next to her. Mac smiled as she took the offered up, sipping it slightly, tasting the wonderful flavor. Luckily the terminal supplied a decent coffee shop to help those leaving at such odd hours.

And I know in time
We'll build the dreams we treasure
We'll be all right

Looking to the bag Harm held in his hand, she saw him searching for the pastries he bought to sweeten the midnight snack a little before the four-hour plane ride home. Yet he grimaced slightly, obviously irritated with the selection given to him by the store. "Something wrong?" Mac asked, unable to keep a straight face, observing his annoyed mood.

Just you and I

Harm took out a donut, gazing at it. "I asked for a Danish."

Mac smiled openly now, asking simply, "You didn't see what they were putting in the bag?"

And I
Remember our first embrace

Harm decided not to answer, however, taking a bite of the donut he didn't order. The icing covered a bit of his upper lip, and Mac giggled as he searched for a napkin, realizing then how disorganized he was with such a simple trip. Harm usually was much more orderly, despite the present evidence to the contrary. Deciding to safe him from his search, Mac grabbed his face, kissing him softly, initially removing the icing from his lips, both laughing lightly.

That smile that was on your face
The promises that we made

As she released, Mac saw Harm's stare, his eyes boring into her own. Something was bouncing around in his head, perhaps something he kept to himself the entire weekend. Stating before, Mac always knew Harm's intentions were never just one, but many. The vacation increased their love, desire, passion, and, most importantly, their intimacy. His eyes spoke of another request. "What's going on in that mind of yours, sailor?"

And now
Your love is my reward
And I'll love you even more
Than I ever did before

Harm smiled then, placing the donut back in the bag, setting it in the chair next to them. Taking her hands in his, knowing the time to make his case was now, he began, "Actually there was another reason why I brought you here."

Just you and I

Mac smirked, replying, "You can't hide much from me, Harmon Rabb."

We can entrust each other

Harm shrugged, knowing full well she will probably like his train of thought, what subject remained on his mind for some time now. After the weekend they just shared, Harm was convinced now more than ever that they were ready for this next step. Nothing could stop them. Taking the step together, everything would work out wonderfully. "I've realized that I don't want to leave here, go back to Washington, and go home alone."

With you in my life
There'll never be another
We'll be all right
Just you and I

Mac believed she knew where this was going, and, in fact, admitted she thought of it often, especially now. Yet she didn't want to believe it, believe the next step arrived for them. "What do you mean?" she asked, guarding her senses from Harm as best she could, not wanting to reveal too much.

And I
Remember out first embrace

Sighing slightly, Harm replied, "Well, I love you. I hated not being there for you last week. And now, I never want to leave you. I think maybe ... we should move in together."

That smile that was on your face
The promises that we made

The minute he stated his thoughts, intentions, Mac felt a great weight lifted. Something deep inside her reassured her that such a decision was needed, that their relationship was not just a nightly fling here and there, but a serious commitment. This weekend proved their relationship existed on a completely different level, perhaps shining a light on their inability to survive by just seeing each other a few times a week. They loved each other too deeply. Taking his hand in hers, she whispered, "Okay."

And now
Your love is my reward

The weekend was complete, Harm and Mac walking hand in hand towards the door leading to the plane. What they needed to accomplish on a personal, intimate level came together, both gaining a new commitment towards the special circumstances of their relationship. They needed each other too much, so often, their souls aching when the other wasn't around. Reaching the door, both handing their tickets to the airline attendant, Harm looked to Mac with happiness dancing in his eyes, kissing her for the last time on Las Vegas soil.

And I'll love you even more
Than I ever did before

What they didn't see were the set of eyes staring at them from a far off distance, glancing carefully over a drawn newspaper. What Harm and Mac never suspected was the person who watched them the entire weekend, learning their secret. What never entered their minds, a danger looming in the near future that only the person hiding behind the paper knew of. What was to come, well hidden, as the person stood, walking swiftly to follow the Lieutenant Colonel and Commander on their flight. The future promised to one another would soon fall into jeopardy, this much was certain. Nothing could stop it, as the person sat only a few seats behind. Soon everything would be lost.

We made it
You and I.

Fade out song ....

... More to Come ...

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