Now That's Scary

Chapter 4: Wonderfully Grounded

Or: Together Forever

Or: Melting Ice

Or: Another Ring of Fire

Or: You're Gonna Hate Me For This

Disclaimer: The Nightmare Before Christmas does not belong to me, not that I'm complaining.

Be warned: this chapter is, indeed, a romance. However, it's not the kind of Nightmare fluff to which most readers are accustomed. No, it doesn't have any unnatural pairings. No, it's not really angsty.

It's a romance that allows room for argument, opinions of other characters, and something different--not to be pretentious, but to show that I agree with the eloquent line in Stephen King's Cycle of the Werewolf: "Love feels like death." Speaking of canines, Zero's lines will be written inparentheses. His words aren't intended as anti-Sally—Zero's just jealous.

Oh, and Jack and Sally aren't going to go through wedding-bell Hell in this chapter. I'm not going to ridicule anybody; I just didn't feel like having them get married.

One more thing: although I haven't bestowed reproductive organs upon any skeletons, I have taken another bizarre liberty with Jack's anatomy.

Jack Skellington was in his tower room, talking to his oh-so-faithful dog, Zero. Unfortunately for Zero, Jack was talking about how wonderful Sally was.

"I had a great time with Sally three days ago," Jack said. "She's really sweet."

"(That's good to know)," said Zero. He was really thinking: There you go again, blathering on about Sally. What's so great about her?

"I took her to a Dead Beatles concert. They're made up of George Harrison and John Lennon. Sally just ate it up!"

"(I'm happy for her.)" Forget about Sally. Did you enjoy it?

"The last time we kissed, she bit my tongue."

Ha ha!

A knock came at the downstairs door.

"Oh, that would be Sally!"

Again? Cripes.

"I've gotta get the doorbell this instant. Goodness knows I don't see her enough in this fandom." With that, Jack sped down the spiral staircase, his absurdly long legs making it possible for him to only touch every eighth step or so.

Don't trip and hurt your ego, Jack.

Jack opened the door, which revealed Sally standing on the doorstep.

"Hi there, Jack!" she exclaimed, grinning and waving.

"Good…er…."

"Morning."

"Yes. It's some hour in the morning. C'mon in."

Sally entered the manor. Jack shut the door.

"So…" muttered Sally, smoothing the newly-found wrinkle on her dress. "What would you like to do today?"

Jack knew that his suggestion did not really matter, inasmuch as Sally was independent enough to make her own decisions. "I don't have a particular idea," he said. "It all depends on what you want to do."

"Oh, goody," said Sally. She then pounced on Jack with the ferocity of a rabid, starving lion chasing a herd of zebras. This produced a sickening cracking noise.

"Why do I feel so warm around my midsection?" Jack dreamily asked.

"Probably because your lower stomach is bleeding from the outside," Sally responded.

Jack glanced down at his lower half. He saw that red blood was oozing out of the area just below his upper belly, and was slowly covering everything under it. Everything from the lower stomach to the knees was soaking with blood. Soon it would reach to the legs.

"Why, so it is," he remarked. Then Sally looked at it more closely. Her clothes, as well as Jack's, now had unsightly red blotches on them.

"Oh, no!" she shouted. "Now I've gone and ruined our clothing."

Jack winced.

"Um…it's not your fault," he said, speaking in what he hoped was a soothing voice. "It's my fault for bleeding." Of course, he knew that this was a bald-faced lie, but also felt that it was his duty to make Sally happy.

Sally's expression changed to one of pleasantness. "Well, if that's the case, you've been bad," she chirped, wagging a finger in Jack's face. "And do you know what happens to bad people?"

"Are you trying to say that I have to give myself a Christmas present?"

Sally giggled. "No, silly. Badpeople get punished. Let's go upstairs."

Zero was now in his basket, pretending not to notice what was going on with Jack and Sally. He was really watching with morbid fascination what was happening.

What's she going to do to my master? And what did he do to upset her? It must've been really awful.

Jack was sitting on the floor, and his arms and legs were in chains that were attached to the wall. Sally, meanwhile, was digging through a closet.

"Is this really necessary?" asked Jack.

"Yes. I wanted to make sure you wouldn't escape." Sally eyed a shelf above the clothing in the closet, and took something off it.

"Ah-ha! Just what I was looking for," she said.

She was holding a large wooden X-shaped cross. A string was attached to each end of the cross, and each string was tied so that it ended in a loop.

A look of alarm and shock crossed Jack's face. "I haven't been able to find that for months," he gasped.

Sally grinned with a mixture of sweetness and mischievousness. Then, she set the wooden cross on the floor.

"Could you unchain me, please?"

"Of course, dear."

Sally knelt down and opened the cuffs on Jack's wrists and ankles. Just as he was about to rise, Sally gently pushed him back onto the floor.

"Don't get up just yet. I need you to hold still, honey."

She picked up the wooden cross and slid the loops over Jack's extremities. The loopsfit snugly, yet comfortably.

"Now you can stand up," Sally said to Jack.

Jack rose from the floor. Before he could move again, Sally grabbed the cross and jumped onto the bed, pulling Jack with her.

"What are you doing?" asked Jack, confusedly.

Instead of replying, Sally set Jack back on the floor, making him at a lower position than she was. Suddenly, she lifted the upper-left part of the cross, which made Jack's left arm swing upwards.

"Oh, no," Jack groaned.

Sally lifted the bottom-right part of the cross at such an angle that caused Jack to kick himself in the face.

"OW! Why did you do that?"

"You said that it was your fault for bleeding."

Jack opened his mouth, but immediately closed it. He didn't want to admit that he had been lying.

Then, Sally pulled both of the upper strings sideways, which made Jack clap his hands. After that, she jerked rapidly and repeatedly on the bottom two strings, causing Jack to stand up and move in awkward positions.

"You're a pretty good dancer, Jack."

"Thank you. But you're controlling my motions…."

After Sally left, Jack was free to detach his strings. So, he untied the loops, and sat down on his bed.

"Whew. That was exhausting!"

And pretty weird—even for you, Zero thought.

A telephone, which had been conveniently placed on the beside table, rang. Jack picked it up on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Hi! This is Sally. Did you know that Johnny Cash is giving a concert on Thursday?"

"He is? No, I didn't. And are you implying that you want me to take you?"

"Of course. Why else would I have told you about it? Well, goodbye."

Typical. But maybe Johnny Cash'll play "Ring of Fire."

The phone rang another time. Jack answered it in between the first and second ring.

"Hello?"

"It's Sally. There's gonna be a sale on ghastly-looking rings at the mall on Monday."

"You expect me to take you, right?"

"You bet. Goodbye."

This isn't looking good for my master.

The telephone rang for a third time. Jack was too tired to answer it quickly, so he picked it up on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Sally again. Sorry if I'm bothering you."

"You're not bothering me at all," Jack fibbed.

"Ah, good. Guess what? Dr. Finklestein—I'm supposed to be like his daughter, despite the fact that he treats me more like I'm his annoying little sister—says that on Wednesday, we can convert his laboratory into a movie theater."

"What? I'm having trouble imagining that."

"That's okay. See you then."

Several hours had passed, and Jack was dressed in his pajamas, lying in his bed. Just as he was about to become unconscious, the telephone rang.

Jack was so tired and angry that he didn't think before answering the phone.

"SHUT UP! I'm trying to sleep!"

"This is Tim Burton," replied the caller. "I was thinking about maybe making another movie with you in it, but I guess I've changed my mind now."

Jack was, needless to say, unpleasantly surprised. "No! Wait! I didn't mean it! I'm sorry!"

The next day, Jack was pretty sure that Sally would come over again. Eager to avoid a repeat of the marionette and telephone incidents, Jack had dressed himself accordingly.

When Sally knocked on the castle door, she was adequately surprised to see a skeleton with a spiky headband and a billowy, red-striped black dress answer the door. The skeleton who had answered the door also wore blood-red stiletto shoes and dark purple eye shadow.

"I changed sexes earlier," said the skeleton, speaking in a falsetto voice. "I'm afraid I can't date you anymore."

Sally laughed momentarily. "Nice try, Jack. You're not fooling anyone, although that would've been the scariest costume idea you've ever had. Put your regular clothes back on."

Jack dropped his falsetto tone. "Aw, drat. I was hoping you'd fall for it."

"Well, I didn't. But it's all right."

Sally wrapped her arms around Jack's waist and kissed him on his cold, dead lips.

Wow. Ain't love grand? Zero mused.

Jack and Sally…their love is like a dead flower!

NEXT TIME: The next chapter will probably be about dealing with fans, but in a significantly different way from the first two chapters.