Why me

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. Just a fanfiction. So please don't sue me.

Chapter 1: crying

She turned around slowly as another tear slid down her face. She couldn't believe she was crying. The bossy, red-headed, green-eyed Lily Evans who everyone assumed never to cry was crying. No one had seen her crying before, except in her childhood years, before she had come to Hogwarts.

She turned around once more, two tears coming along with this motion wetting her favorite shirt. She saw her friends trying to comfort her with hugs that only got their shoulders wet. They were doing it out of their own kindness she knew, but she wished they would stop, didn't they understand it was no use she had been crying for who knew how long. It was as if she was crying the ocean through her eyes, it never stopped only when she was alone and no one reminded her of what he had said and done and that strange emotion that crept up on her while she had her defenses down. She remembered it clearly now as if it had happened yesterday, but it didn't, it had happened 3 days ago, he had cornered her after transfiguration...

"Lily can I-I-I...umm t-talk to you", he said with a grand difficulty as his hands shook violently, and sweat glistened down his face.

"What is it Potter", she had said bitterly, she wasn't interested in obnoxious prat standing before her, that continuously asked her out.

"I need to tell you something", he mumbled nervously as she asked him to speak louder.

"I need to tell you something" he repeated and continued, "Please Lily just listen."

"Alright Potter, but please don't waste my time", she had said as she leaning against a wall.

"I…wont…I"

"Yes Potter?"

"You know how...I- I... always stare at you during class and I'm... I'm always showing off in front of you and I dumped all my girlfriends for you and I ask you out, despite the fact that you've rejected me I think about... 97 times. And you know Lily I see your face in my dreams and when... I close my eyes I see your face, your perfect face, your green eyes and your hair. And you're attitude and everything about you. You're not pretty because you're not a little girl and you're not hot because I respect you. I know you think I'm a prick and I'm an obnoxious prat and I brag too much about everything and I know you really hate me. But I-I-I oh Bloody hell I rehearsed this with Sirius I... Lily umm I Love you. There I said it no lie and I would anything for you I'd even hex myself a million times for you just to see you smile and laugh. I just can't take this anymore Lily you drive me crazy. And I just want you to know that I love you", he finished, panting as if he had just delivered a speech to a hundred people.

When he finished he stood there waiting for her response when instead she turned and ran as she had never ran before. She ran, as James Potter stood there motionless head low as if he had just been rejected for a request of marriage...

And now Lily Evans engulfed by memories from that day, began to whimper once more as she remembered how mean she was to him. How she just ran, without saying one word to him, and how she had fought so hard against him. Not to feel anything for him, unlike all those other girls who had fallen head over heels for him. But had he confessed his love for any of them? No, Only for her. She 

had promised herself she would never ever fall for James, let alone go out with him once, no matter how many times he asked her out.

But now, she lay there, her face buried in a pillow, thinking. What if?