This chapter is for ShadowM0rning.

---Previous Chapter---

"Hermione?"

"Yeah," she said, and sat down next to Draco.

"Will you go to the ball with me?"

---

The Halloween Ball

That definitely wasn't expected.

"Yeah, sure," she said, without even thinking about it.

He grinned at her, stood up and held a hand out for her. She took hold of it and he pulled her up. She couldn't help but giggle.

"Come on, let's get back to the common room," he said, and she followed him out of the Room of Requirement.

The trip back was a quiet one. Hermione couldn't stop thinking about Draco. He had only asked her to the ball as a friend, right? She remembered the day he had bought her out of the Empty World. He had said he loved her and couldn't lose her. But, it was just a friendly love, like Harry and Ron loved her, right?

Then why were her instincts telling her it was more? He seemed happy, really happy. He wasn't wearing the mask he usually wore.

Were Ginny and Lyssa actually talking about Draco? Was it so obvious he loved her to everyone but Hermione? But, Ginny had said that 'she loved him' too. But Hermione didn't love Draco. Did she?

He'd always been there for her, when she needed him. He was always there when she broke down crying. He brought her out of the Empty World. He stuck by her through everything.

This was stupid! They'd only known each other for a few weeks. Hermione cared about him, a lot. Come to think about it, she didn't know what she would do if she lost him. But...

What else was love about? Having someone who is always there for you? Someone you trust. Someone who cares about you as much as you do them. Someone who was there when you needed them. Someone who was an amazing friend. Someone who was more than a friend?

She was always very close to him. He hugged her a lot. He pulled her on his lap to hug her and she'd bury her head in his chest. Could she do that with Harry or Ron?

They had a connection. She knew that. She'd always known that even if she had only just realised it. Their childhoods had been so similar. He understood her. They could talk to each other, and have the other understand and help them through it.

She was bought out of her reverie when she saw a hand waved in front of her face.

"Hermione? You in there?" said Draco from in front of her. Some when, she had stopped.

He was grinning at her. He looked so... if she dare say it, cute. She stared into his eyes, trying to read him from within. All she saw was compassion, and ... love.

She could feel herself weakening. He was making her weak. He'd destroy her if he broke her heart. If she got her hopes up only to be laughed at... she couldn't have that. She wouldn't be able to get through that. She forced herself to look away.

She couldn't fall for him, not after everything that had happened.

And so she continued their walk back to the common room. In silence. Not looking at him.

But just his presence made her tingle.

She walked into the Gryffindor common room, ahead of Draco and made a beeline straight next to Ginny. Should she tell her? Would she understand? She wasn't in the position Hermione was in. She hadn't been through it.

Maybe she could tell Harry? He had been through a lot in his life. He and Ginny were together. Maybe he had felt the same when they had gotten together? Come to think of it, she didn't know how they had gotten together. And Hermione knew Ginny liked Harry even if she denied it.

She couldn't tell Ron, he wouldn't understand. And she hadn't known Lyssa long enough.

So, she was on her own. Again.

She looked at the clock. There was half an hour until dinner started. She needed to think.

"Guys, I think I'm gonna go and, um, clean up a bit for dinner, ok?"

They all nodded. Hermione walked up the stairs, not missing Lyssa's suspicious look.

She walked straight for her bed, and collapsed in it. She didn't know what to feel! Her heart was telling her to try it, but her head was telling her that she couldn't take the heartache if he said no.

She didn't even know if she liked him! It was just because Ginny and Lyssa's conversation had made her think. And then Draco asked her to the ball. She probably had the wrong of the stick!

The door opened, and she looked up to see Lyssa walking in. She smiled and walked straight over to Hermione's bed.

She raised an eyebrow. "I can read you like a book."

"That's great. Thanks." She smiled. "What do you mean, anyway?"

"I knew you weren't coming up here to get ready. You were trying to get away from us. So, what's up?"

"Nothing."

"Come on, tell me. What have you got to lose?"

"Everything?"

"Then you could gain everything. So, tell me. I promise I won't tell anyone else. And I promise you won't lose everything by telling me."

"That made no sense. You know what you and Ginny were talking about before you left the Room of Requirement earlier?"

"You heard that?" She nodded. "Yeah, ok, what about it?"

"Whom were you talking about?"

"Isn't that obvious?"

"Stop playing with me, just tell me."

"Ok. We were talking about you and Malfoy."

She slumped back onto the bed. "I knew it!"

"That's promising."

"This isn't funny! Do you really think he likes me?"

"Please. He spends his entire day staring at you like this." And she made a face, which Hermione assumed was a caricature as she was wide-eyed and practically drooling.

"Ok, whatever."

"No, I'm serious. You're so blind! Do you like him?"

"I don't know. I hadn't even thought about it until he asked me to the ball."

"He asked you?!? FINALLY. Did you say yes?"

"Yes..." she said slowly.

"YES!" she shrieked. "Finally!"

"You're not helping!"

"Oh, sorry. Well, how do you feel when you're around him?"

"Safe."

"What about when he looks at you?"

"I don't know!"

"Does he make your stomach churn? Do you feel weak when you stare at him? Does the prospect of being in his arms make you... I don't know... tingly inside, like butterflies?"

She nodded. That's exactly how she felt.

"Then I say, give it a go!"

"I can't. What if he doesn't like me? What if he hurts me? I can't take that."

"Firstly, you'll never know if you don't try it. Secondly, he does care about you, Hermione. You know he loves you. And he would never hurt you because he knows how you feel, and he knows that if he was hurt any more, he couldn't take it and so he knows you couldn't either."

"I can't. I hate to admit it, but I'm too insecure." She shrugged.

Lyssa just stared at her, thinking. Five minutes later, they walked back down to the common. She sat down in her favourite armchair by the fire, and opened her mind, if you like. Instead of looking at the common room from her eyes, through her problems.

Draco sat in an armchair also, just staring into the fire. It hit her with a jolt that she hadn't been there for him nearly half as much as he had for her. Draco had been through just as much as Hermione, hell, maybe even more, but Draco still had Hermione as his number one priority, almost. Draco must be a lot stronger than Hermione to be able to withstand all the pain, anger and hate that must be inside him, without so much as shedding a single tear. Well, he had, a few times, but he had never broken down. Draco, however, knew exactly what he was and had nothing to hide, unlike Hermione. She didn't think for a second that he was, in any way, over the terrible ordeal his life had been, but she knew that he wasn't confused at the same time. Not that it meant much, but part of why Hermione had broken down so many times was because she had to explain herself to her friends and had gotten caught up in those emotions.

She wondered exactly where Draco got his strength. He'd been practically disowned from a mentally, physically and sexually abusive family. Exactly where did he get the strength to trust someone like Hermione, who he had known for so little time? But, then again, she found herself trusting him. Even though the prospect of being alone was extremely daunting. She knew that trusting someone meant she had someone and when you have something, you can lose that something, and she couldn't loose the trust they had in each other, because trust meant so much to her.

Still confused, she looked around to Ginny, who was lying in Harry's arms, also staring into the fire; even though Ron and Harry were deeply engrossed in some conversation about green hats and yellow socks. Ginny had also been stronger than Hermione. Not once had she broken down, either, even though she had been put through the same hell as Hermione, probably at the same hands. Then it hit her. Had Percy been there? He can't have, can he? Because when Harry had blurted out the fact that Percy was a Death Eater, both Ginny and Ron had gone completely off their rockers. So, Hermione can't have been through what Ginny had been, or vice-versa. Exactly what Voldemort's intentions were, she didn't know, because she was positive that having your own brother rape you was a lot worse than even five Death Eaters. Hermione suddenly realised that her rape, at the hands of her own father, was completely different to the horror of what happened at Malfoy Manor.

But, then it really hit her. She felt as though she had been mentally slapped, and looked around the room to make sure no one had noticed. They hadn't.

Ginny had Harry, just as Harry had Ginny. Having someone like that, someone you trust and love with all your heart must be extremely comforting. Hermione found herself wondering exactly how many nights Ginny had spent in Harry's bed, each soothing the other to a peaceful sleep.

She still didn't know the truth about Lyssa, but Hermione knew that trust was involved in that story. Lyssa had to know she could trust them, and, quite frankly, Hermione was sure she didn't trust them. Part of Hermione was telling her that, maybe, Lyssa been through absolutely nothing. That the pained look that shadowed her features was purely to make them feel guilty and stop asking. Almost as though she was covering up a secret, but not a bad one. Hermione had learned to trust her instincts, and even though she hadn't thought about them lately, they were telling her Lyssa was in no way evil.

She was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts as someone shook her, and slowly they made their way down to dinner.

Hermione tried to act normal around Draco. But, every time she was near him she felt nervous. Even though she felt safe. She was so confused! Why couldn't her heart just tell her what it felt? She realised, with another annoying jolt, that she been in a world of her own a lot lately. She wondered if her mind was subconsciously protecting her from, well, herself. Having a lot of eyes on her made her feel extremely nervous, and sick.

So, she looked around herself. The halls were practically swarming with minors. Each of them grinning, laughing. She wished she could have such a carefree life. Not have to think constantly about her past, present and an extremely foreboding future with an extremely sadistic dark lord who had sworn all Muggleborns, Muggles and Half-Bloods dead, as well as blood traitors, and just traitors. Hell, would there even be anyone left if the git got his own way? He'd probably end up killing himself after trying to get even more power than what he already harboured.

Shaking her head, she continued to look around, and found to her complete and utter shock, or maybe not, that a hell of a lot of people were staring at them, glaring even. Glaring at Draco. She realised that it would always be that way. He was the son of Voldemort's right-hand man. He would always be thought of as evil, always be thought of as untrustworthy, and he'd always be mistreated, no matter what he did to prove himself. Draco was stronger than she thought. But, she guessed, he knew he was innocent, he knew they were all wrong and if he kept his heart and head filled with that thought, that he could just ignore it. But she didn't think she would even be able too. Just like Harry.

"Guilty by association."

That night, Hermione went to sleep so confused, she spent the night dreaming. About what, she wasn't sure. First she found herself walking up a large hill, but just as she got to the top, something pulled her back down again. She then found herself trying to climb a wall, but again, just as she got to the top, she was pulled back down. And more of the same, with the same patterns. She had no idea what these dreams symbolised, but she knew there was some hidden subconscious meaning to them. Or maybe she really was going crazy.

Either way, she wasn't happy with one of them, which had included Draco. She found herself reaching out to Draco, desperately trying to seek him, to touch him, for him to hold her and reassure her, but again, she was pulled out of his clutches, as much as they both struggled to stay together.

This succeeded in confusing her even more. What the hell did they symbolise? That she was trying to find something, deep inside her, that not even she knew about, but was repeatedly being pulled back? Like, how she had worked so hard for everything her whole life but lost everything in the end? Or was it some freaky way of divining the future? Was she actually going to fall in love with Draco, finally have him, but get pulled away at the last moment?

They then led onto more dreams about her father and Percy Weasley. Dreams which did not confuse her in the slightest. Dreams, which did not tell the future, or tell her some subconscious mush she couldn't understand.

No, something that would haunt her for the rest of her life, something that would bring horror to her mind, her heart, and she hearts of others when remembered. When considered. When dreamed.

The next day was spent doing homework underneath a tree on Hogwarts grounds. Hermione had had a particularly horrible night and was in a gruesome mood the next. Her feelings didn't help.

She was still so confused. She knew something had been sparked inside of her with what Ginny and Lyssa had said. She was so sure that her feelings were getting more intimate, but she couldn't help being reminded about her dreams.

What if they came true? What if she finally got hold of him, but was pulled away before anything could really happen? Because he could sooth her to sleep, comfort her after a reliving, or just be there for her, forever. Before, even, the first kiss.

That was, of course, if she got it. And, if she even wanted it. She didn't know. She hit her book she was reading against her head, but that only served to give her even more of a headache.

Draco and the others kept asking her what was up, but she just snapped at them that everything was fine, so in the end they stopped asking. Draco seemed to be around a lot, and was there to comfort her.

By lunch, she had come to two conclusions. Draco, and only Draco, had the power to pull Hermione out of a bad mood, as by the time she sat in the Great Hall, nibbling on a bread roll, she was happily laughing along with her best friends.

She also realised she was falling in love.

It wasn't just a silly schoolgirl crush either; it was real. She started getting butterflies whenever he touched her. And she kept getting lost in his eyes. They told so many stories, yet were so calm and reassuring. And loving.

But, she refused to believe he felt the same way she did. That was going too far.

This was also why she was so frustrated. She didn't want to be falling in love. It just meant she had more ways of getting hurt, and she just could not take getting hurt any more.

She didn't want to hurt anymore.

At about four o'clock, they all went to get dressed for the ball. It was starting at seven, with a feast. Lyssa demanded the boys get ready with the girls, but the girls got kicked out of the boy's dorm after about a minute so they decided to take their stuff up to the Room of Requirement.

Hermione was pretty sure that Lyssa just wanted to watch the process of the boys' transformations. Not that she admitted it, but Hermione was pretty sure Lyssa was eying Ron up once he was dressed in black cargo trousers and a semi-tight black t-shirt.

Lyssa had also demanded they dye their hair black, as they were dressing up as certain people, and those people had black hair. Hermione found that once their hair was dyed, they looked extremely pale, and gothic. Perfect.

Hermione, Lyssa and Ginny had also dyed their hair. Ginny was sporting black hair with red highlights, and Hermione had black hair with pink underneath.

Hermione and Ginny were both wearing rather short black skirts with fishnet tights and a black sleeveless top. They also wore about a thousand black bands, studded bracelets and sweatbands. Lyssa, however, was clad in black cargo bottoms with chains on each side, and a red belt with studs. She also wore the top Hermione had, but she wore a fishnet top underneath. She also had the bracelets, and a silver necklace that she wore, apparently, all the time. It had a ring, a dragon charm and a star on it. They each wore thick heeled knee-high boots with buckles that went all the way up the leg.

Harry was wearing a fishnet top and a pair of cargo pants that had chains just like Lyssa's hanging off them. His hair had been dyed to have red highlights, and he had a large skull necklace around his neck, as well as a few studded bracelets on his arms.

Draco was wearing the same trousers as Harry and the same top as Ron, except, ironically, it was more fitted so it showed of his surprisingly muscular chest and arms. This succeeded in making Hermione fancy Draco for his looks as well as his personality. She looked around to Lyssa, who was watching Ron closely, again. Hermione couldn't quite see what she saw in him, but when Hermione turned around to look, she noticed Ron too had a rather muscular chest and arms. Harry, too.

Wondering where they got them from, Hermione turned back to Lyssa to bring it up, but she was walking over to a back in the corner of the room. She pulled out a piece of paper, which turned out to be a poster of The Fixation. She was eyeing it closely, then looking around the room.

"Right, make-up."

"WHAT?"

"I am not wearing make-up!"

"There is no way in Hogwarts-hell I am wearing make-up."

"Tough, you have to. You only have to wear eye liner, and lipstick, but we can pass on the lipstick if you like." They gave in, in the end, and wore the eyeliner.

"Right, Hermione and Ginny, we have to wear make-up too. A bit more than the guys, but still. Hermione you are wearing black eyeliner with bright pink eyeliner on top, and Ginny the same but red. I'm just black all over." Hermione though this sounded like a particularly hideous nightmare, so she went to look at the poster and saw that it actually looked pretty cute.

Once they were all clad in make-up, clothes, and in the boy's case, black hair, they all took a look over themselves. Lyssa was still eyeing Ron more than Draco or Harry, so Hermione was sure she liked him. They all stood in front of the picture, which had been pinned on the wall.

"We haven't got black nails," said Ron.

"Oh my gosh! How could I forget?" exclaimed Lyssa, who then started fiddling in her bag. "I don't have any black nail-varnish though."

"What would we do without the old Hermione, hey?" asked Hermione, who knew just the right spell for this. "The only downside is that it lasts for 78 hours."

"I've always wanted to wear black nail varnish," shrugged Lyssa.

"Yeah, it does look pretty neat," said Ginny.

"Ok, then, I guess we'll do it then." Hermione was a bit reluctant, but did it never the less.

They then all turned around to the poster again.

"Hang on, our tops don't say the same theirs do. Like, his says 'the Fixation' and his says 'do I look like I care'?"

"So, we charm the tops?" said Ginny.

"Uh huh. Ok, anyone know how to make the words right?"

Hermione sighed. Again. And then worked her magic. They, again, for the last time, hopefully, turned back to the poster and stared at it. Hermione was pretty sure that everyone was wearing the correct clothing, their hair looked right and they were donning the right accessories.

"Hermione, could you straighten and lengthen you hair?" asked Lyssa.

"Uh huh. I don't know why I still make it look like this. Finite Incantartum." And her hair was a lot less bushy. They all stared at her in awe.

"Is that your normal hair?"

"Yep," she said as she cast another spell to straighten it.

"Why do you wear it so bushy then?"

"I used to hide behind it."

"You told us it took hours to get your hair like that!"

"Yeah, cause I knew that if I told you the truth you'd bug me about wearing it normal," she said absently as she made her hair longer.

"I never knew you could do that!" said Lyssa, who was eyeing Hermione's longer hair. "How long does the charm last?" asked Lyssa.

"It's really bad for your hair, lasts 24 hours and can only be done every 3,000 hours," she said, with a pointed look at Lyssa who looked far too hopeful.

She then looked disappointed. "What's the time?"

Hermione looked over to the clock on the wall. Six fifty five.

"We'd better go!" she cried.

So, they practically ran down the several flights of stairs it took. They slowed as they neared the entrance hall. People were starring at them, and whispering to each other. But, Hermione found she didn't care. Let them whisper, it wasn't as if they meant anything to her.

Hell, she was sure most of them were plotting, behind her back, of course, some evil way to get her and the others killed.

She was also sure she was extremely paranoid.

But she was also sure that had every right to be.

Hermione took a deep breath as they neared the Great Hall. She then cast an apprehensive look at Draco, who took hold of her hand and smiled reassuringly. As normal, her stomach went wild, but she felt safe as long as he was there.

So, together, they walked into the Great Hall.

About last chapter.... I knew I wasn't going to get 15 reviews. Do you think I'm stupid? LMAO. It would have been nice to know that many people were reading it, but I wont spoil the fic for the people who are nice enough to review.

SundayMorning: Ok. Second, that wasn't true for me. This fic was a way for me to express emotions I shouldn't hold. Third, lol my biggest fan shouldn't call me immature :)

Thankyou to everyone else who reviewed! You guys are the reason this fic is still going.