I See Talking Snakes
Chapter 1: Train troubles
Harry Potter, a boy who was strange in many ways, had been going to Hogwarts, School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for three years. This would be his fourth year there, and he felt quite anxious to go. He was able to go to the World Cup with his friends Ron Weasley, his family, and Hermione Granger just recently. They left a little earlier than Harry to board the train because Mr. Weasley was keeping him with his many Muggle questions. Ron and Hermione, were waiting patiently on the train for his arrival. What Harry and his friends didn't know was that someone was evilly plotting against them. A horrible plot that would make all of Hogwarts a perplexing sight (even for Hogwarts)!
Harry happily waved tp Mr. and Mrs Weasley, and then stepped onto the train. When he did so, he felt the very air around him thin---and became cold. As a peculiar, gush of wind brushed Harry's hair; he felt a very strange, tingling sensation, running from his toes up to his now throbbing head. His knees became weak, with the quick sharp pain his scar gave, and he fell onto them, breathing more rapidly. Looking up, he saw something that almost made his heart stop: the shadow of a man ran off the train.
Harry finally regained his strength as the pain and the tingling faded away. Getting to his feet, he said quietly to himself, "I see talking snakes," in a strange, mysterious voice that ended in a hiss. He had meant to say, "That was weird." He looked around curiously, wondering what had happened.
Then he said, "I see talking snakes," again. This time he had meant to say "What in the --." He had to do something about this---he had to find Ron and Hermione.
Ron turned around and looked at Harry as though he was horrified. His face was pale, and he gawked at Harry as if he were looking at Aragog once again. "Harry, what are you talking about?" Ron asked, but he sounded very petrified, and his frightened expression never went away.
Harry said again, "I see talking snakes!" This was starting to piss Harry off. He was trying to say, "Ron, what in the world is going on??" Harry was very peeved. He scratched his head in reflection. ::THINK HARRY THINK!!::
Draco looked at Harry with big innocent eyes, then he started clucking like a chicken. He ran down the hall in his undergarments, flapping his arms, oblivious to the fact that he indeed wasn't a chicken. This distracted Harry a bit, but he thought of something all the same. Maybe he could write something down! Harry grabbed the apprehensive Ron and went into a compartment -- that was already taken.
"Oh, my love, kiss me!!!" they heard Snape say in a tone Harry would never expect to hear from his Potion's teacher. Harry tried to laugh, but it came out as a stretched, misty chuckle, with a hiss at the end. Harry became flustered by his new speech impairment.
Snape finally became aware that his affair was being disturbed by two---men! "NO!" He shouted! "She's mine, you cannot have her you insolent fools!" He clung to his lover as if it were a matter of life or death. Harry hadn't realized whom Snape was lovingly embracing---until now---
"HERMIONE!!!! What are you doing!?!" Ron yelled, his voice squeaking in his distress. Hermione's affectionate face suddenly turned bright red. She got up and pulled Harry and Ron out of the compartment.
"Wait, my love!!" they heard Snape yell almost like Romeo to Juliet. She turned around and tried to go back, but Harry grabbed her and steered her to an empty compartment. He could hear Snape yelling, "Unhand her you villains!" Harry ignored him, locking the compartment door then he pulled some parchment and a quill from his bag handing it to Hermione.
"I love Snape so much; he's so very sexy!!" she said in a very lovey-dovey voice. Harry stared at the quivering Ron, and then remembered Ron couldn't make any other expressions.
Hermione wrote on the parchment.Hi guys. This is weird -- I just made out with Professor SNAPE!! Help me!! Make sure we stay away from each other because I can't control this. I'm absolutely disgusted. Harry, write here.
Harry took the quill. Hermione, Ron. Hi, guys. This is just plain weird. All I can is say "I see talking snakes" in an annoying voice that sounds much like that Professor Trelawney the twins speak of. What should we do? I remember getting a tingling feeling and seeing a shadow or something run off the train. Ron, you next.
Ron picked up the quill. Well, whatever it was, I am stuck being a stupid, scared little git. We need to find my brothers and Ginny and stick together through this until we arrive at Hogwarts. Oh, by the way Hermione, SNAPE LOVER!!! HA HA HA!!!
At this point, Hermione hit Ron's shoulder because she couldn't glare at him. "OWW!!" Ron yelled in a baby voice. "That hurt. I want outta here!" Ron whined. The situation would be quite hilarious to Harry if it weren't so serious.
Harry looked at him, then said, "I see talking snakes." Damn! This was really getting annoying! Harry finally took the quill back and wrote –