Title: Not in High School Anymore
Author: ainon
Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: G
Category: Character Study - Buffy, Xander
Pairings: Buffy/Xander
Summary: A quiet morning, and Xander and Buffy see that they've grown up.
Story Notes: Set after 'Selfless' and sometime before, well, before all the really bad stuff that happened in Season 7.
Disclaimer: Characters and everything about the BtVS world belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Just wanted to try and play with them a while.
The sunlight shines through the glass, shimmering past the floating dust. Xander puts his hand into the light, touching the gentle morning warmth. He smiles. A job well done, if he might think so himself.
"Hey. You're done. That was fast."
Xander turns and sees Buffy coming in from the kitchen. He grins at her.
"No broken window stays broken on my watch! Well, it still stays broken, since all I do is just replace it with a new window, but you know what I mean."
Buffy laughs. "You replace it with very nice new windows that stop the rain and the wind from coming in and blowing stuff all over the place. Thanks, Xander."
"Hey. It's what I do."
"It's what you do and you do do good." She comes up to stand beside him, and they both look out to the street though the newly replaced glass. "This is really nice. See through! And no splinters."
Xander keeps his silence and basks in her compliment, such as it is. There's hardly anything really interesting about this job. For true carpentry appreciation, she should see the bookshelves he's going to be putting together at the public library. In fact, Giles should see that. He figures Giles should really want to see that.
Buffy interrupts his thoughts. "If you weren't doing this for me - I mean, if you were doing this at someone else's house, do you think you could get rich?"
"What? Just from fixing windows?"
"Yeah."
"Hey, I can do better than just fix windows. I can build you a whole new walk-in bedroom closet and throw in a custom-order vanity chest and coffee table deal. We can start the haggling now."
He wins a grin from her. "You know what I mean. I really appreciate this, Xander. I don't know what this house will be like if you weren't here all the time, keeping it, well, from breaking. And stuff. Really, thank you."
She hugs him. He wraps his arms around her waist and rests his cheek against her head. He can smell sweet lavender and her hair is soft against his skin. He rests into the comforting contours of her body. They stay that way for a while, and when they pull apart, they're still holding hands.
"I do what I can," he tells her, smiling. He can remember a time when being this close to Buffy, holding hands with Buffy, would have been enough to make his day - make him feel like he were walking on a cloud. She had fuller cheeks, then, was always far more ready with the smile. Her smiles used to light up her eyes too. She used to laugh more. And he was - not smaller, but thinner. No, gangly, that's what he was. He may not have had anywhere near her grace, but he thinks that he was at least quite good at being funny. He used to draw the giggles out of her. "Anyway, I gotta go. My crew's waiting."
"Yeah, okay." Suddenly she laughs, and at Xander quizzical frown she says, "I'm just thinking that hey, you're talking about 'your crew'. You have a crew now, Xander. You've become all Mr. Responsible. You're the boss."
"I'm the boss."
"Yeah, you are. Who would have thought?"
They laugh together - Xander had chimed in with his 'who would have thought' at the same time Buffy said it.
"We aren't in high school anymore," he adds.
"No, we're not." Buffy is still holding his hands, not letting him go. Her eyes gaze into his. She tilts her head and smiles. "Have some breakfast. I made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for everybody."
"I fix your windows for you and all I get is a crummy peanut butter and jelly sandwich?"
She smacks him lightly on the chest. "Don't mock my sandwiches."
"Not mocking the sandwiches. Sandwiches always good. I'm questioning the mode of payment."
She opens her mouth to pun a reply; at least he assumes so, but there are no words. He finds that he can't tear his eyes away from her lips. The whole world around him fades, save for the shape of her lips and the peripheral awareness of her eyes gazing at his lips and his eyes. The whole cliche about time slowing down. He feels her hand reaching up to brush his cheek; he moves his hand up to stroke her hair.
He can hear Dawn and Willow upstairs, shouting a question and an answer to each other, but he doesn't know and doesn't care who's asking and who's answering. He inhales and smells lavender. He feels the soft warmth of exhaled Buffy air. She closes her eyes, angles her face. He closes his eyes and leans forward.
They kiss. A gentle, tentative kiss, a kiss that deepens as time finally actually does stand still. A juvenile thought dashes through his mind: 'I'm kissing Buffy. I'm kissing Buffy!'
And on the heels of that thought, he remembers Anya's goodbye kisses in the morning as he would leave for work, her smiles as he walked into the Magic Box to pick her up after work, her laughter at some joke about dinner. The way her eyes would look into his. He remembers that she's human again now.
She's human.
They pull apart. He looks into Buffy's eyes and sees the surprise and the affection in them. He can see that she hadn't thought about kissing until it actually happened. And that she's not unhappy that it did.
They stay that way for a while, her hands on his face, and his hands cradling her back. They keep looking at each other; keep their hold on each other. From upstairs, he hears Willow and Dawn voices but doesn't hear the words.
Buffy takes a breath, she wants to speak.
"We aren't in high school anymore," Xander says softly, his eyes lingering on her lips, and then up to look into her eyes. He drops his hands to her waist, holds her loosely, ready to let go. He feels her stiffen. She lowers her eyes, licks her lips. Then her eyes meet his again.
"No. We're not."
They let each other go, back away from each other. She flutters her hands about with casual awkwardness, and finally, shrugs. They're still facing each other, standing in front of the window Xander has just replaced, still looking at each other.
She nods then, and smiles, and the smile does reach her eyes. "Breakfast is in the kitchen if you want it."
She does a perky toss of the head, flashes him a cheeky grin, and turns on her heel to head there herself.
He licks his lips. He can taste peanut butter and jelly.
His toolbox is still lying open on the floor. He packs it up, and then with one last glance at the window, shows himself out of the house.
- End -