A/N: Hello! And welcome to another fun-filled installment of A Boy, Lost! For this Chapter, it would be good of you, gentle reader, to note that I made up my own little lore about the American Magic Government. First of all, it wouldn't be a Ministry, because we don't do 'Ministries' here. So it's a Government- a democratic republic, to be exact. But actually, it's not really A Government. It's five. Over here, we have five magical governments—in the South, the Southwest, the Northeast, the Midwest, and the West. I decided upon this because, in my limited travel in the US, I've noted that we do business very differently in different parts of the country. So I split up the magic accordingly. Also, 150 years ago when the South said they wanted to secede- the North said, "Fine. Be gone with ye!" At least the magical government did- they thought the whole "Civil War" thing was a bit silly, and didn't much concern them, actually. The North (which later became the Northeast) moved their capital from DC to Salem, Massachusetts. I have way more lore up in my head- but that's really all you need for this chapter, and quite possibly, for the whole story. So that's all I'm going to tell you. But feel free to let me know if you are dying with questions, comments, or criticisms.

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XIX

XIXIX "Choosing Allies" XIXIX

"Potter, wake up."

Harry roused at the soft whispering and the gentle shaking of his arm. He sat bolt upright when it suddenly occurred to him that he was lying naked on naught but his robe in the grass by the lake.

"Shit! What time is it?" he asked slightly panicked as he scrambled for his scattered clothes.

Malfoy chuckled. "Relax. It's only about 1:00. But I was about to fall asleep too, so I figured we'd best head in if we didn't want to risk being found here in the morning."

Harry paused, casting Malfoy a suspicious grin. "What—did you just sit here while I slept for two hours?"

Malfoy looked down and away, and Harry could have sworn he was blushing. "Well," he said quietly after a pause, "You've never fallen asleep before, so I figured that after… whatever… happened, that you probably needed some rest."

Harry caught Malfoy's chin, turned his face back around and kissed him. "Thanks," he said quietly, looking deep into his eyes. Malfoy gave him a small smile, which Harry returned. Then he said, "But you shouldn't have let me sleep. I wanted to actually talk to you tonight, too."

Malfoy grinned. "'Bout what, Potter?"

"Er…" Harry sat back. He wasn't exactly sure how to start this conversation. He knew where it needed to go. He just wasn't sure how to get there without being somewhat… insulting. For instance, 'Who's side are you on, anyway?' just might rub Malfoy the wrong way.

"Well, here's the thing," he said. "Um… The war is coming to a head. I'm sure you realize that, right?"

Malfoy nodded, his gaze suddenly serious.

"Well, I'm kind of automatically on one side, and your family ties kind of push you to be on the other."

"You don't trust me!" shot Malfoy accusingly, his eyes narrowing slightly.

Harry was silent for a moment. "Malfoy," he began slowly, "You told me that night in Se—Snape's storeroom that you didn't support Voldemort. You just stayed alive. I need to know what that means for us."

Malfoy looked quite angry. "You know bloody well what it means," he said. "It means I live a double life or else I'm tortured like a traitor."

"And I sympathize. Really, I do. But I need to know that when it comes down to it, you're going to be on my side and not your father's. I know that's a lot for me to ask, but things are getting worse. The stakes are getting higher. You can call it selfish, and I might even agree, but I'm preparing to go up against Voldemort. And I can't help but feel that the fate of the entire wizarding world depends on the outcome. I just don't have time to worry about this. I don't want to leave it up to chance. I want to know."

Malfoy looked at Harry for some time as though searching him for answers. But Harry could tell he wasn't attempting Legilimency. Finally, he said simply, "You've changed."

Harry nodded, his eyes serious as well. "Yes, I have."

"What happened while you were gone? Where were you?"

Harry shook his head slowly, and said nothing.

"Are you okay, at least?" asked Malfoy.

Harry paused. "Yes."

"There's no middle ground, is there?"

Harry almost laughed, thinking, 'Not when you're shagging the savior of the wizarding world, there isn't.' But he just said, "No."

Malfoy was quiet for some time. Finally, he said, "I saw you, that day, during the DA battle. You ceased all the magic around you for like a ten-foot radius. No one else seemed to realize what happened, and I couldn't imagine how dense everyone else had to have been to have missed that." He sighed. "I know you're a lot more powerful than you put on, Potter. But the last time I asked you if you really thought you could beat Voldemort, you didn't sound so sure of yourself."

"And you betrayed me and Ginny the next day."

Malfoy looked down, ashamed. "I'm sorry," he said.

Harry said nothing.

"Look, if you were just asking me to stand against Voldemort, I'd announce to the school tomorrow that I think he's just a filthy mudblood. But to stand against my father… Potter, I would need to go into hiding because he really would kill me, I think, if I stood against him. That would be devastating to him. It's pride. It's family pride, and I'd be turning my back on who I am. I'd be turning my back on my family. Maybe all you see of my father is a Death Eater, but he's my father! We're bound by blood… and love, even. I can't just… It's a lot that you're asking."

Harry nodded, and reached over and took Malfoy's hand in his. "I don't need to know tonight," he said. "But I do need to know, whatever the answer."

XIXIX

Hermione and Ron were bickering about Transfiguration homework when Ginny slid into the seat across from Harry in the Great Hall. Next to her, Neville looked up from his breakfast and exclaimed, "Ginny! You are positively glowing this morning! Have a good night, did we?"

Ginny turned bright red and looked down at her plate. All of the sudden, Harry was hit with a huge shock of her embarrassment and turned an even brighter shade of red when he realized that she was experiencing his afterglow from last night.

He gulped down his pumpkin juice, thinking to her, 'Did you feel… everything?'

'No!' she snapped mentally, 'Not everything, anyway, but can we drop it?'

Harry put down his glass of pumpkin juice and started to laugh.

"Fuck, Ginny, we need to figure out how to deal with all of this!"

She sneered at him playfully, laughing, "Shut up! I do not want to talk about this at the breakfast table!"

Neville looked back and forth between them with wide eyes, and then hissed, "You two are speaking another language! Are you twins!"

"Oh, damn it!" said Ginny, still smiling and blushing. "That's another thing we have to figure out. Um, Neville dear? Mind keeping another secret for us?"

Neville shook his head, chuckling. "You guys never cease to amaze me." He put his forefinger over his lips and said, "Mum's the word."

Harry looked up as a flutter of wings signaled that the owls had arrived with the morning post. A gray and brown owl dropped a letter on his plate and soared away. Next to Harry, Hermione gave a knut to the owl that delivered her newspaper.

Harry opened his letter and found a hastily scratched note that said simply:

We're okay. We'll write more when we get a chance.

Perenelle and Nicolas

"What the—" began Harry, but just then, Hermione shrieked.

"Harry!" she turned to him, her eyes consumed with fear. "Oh, Merlin, this is awful!"

As Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Neville leaned forward in concern, Harry heard similar reactions from across the Great Hall as various students opened their papers.

Harry looked at a picture of macabre spread fiercely across the front page, and read the headlines:

DEATH EATER ATTACK IN AMERICA—19 DEAD, 67 WOUNDED

-You-Know-Who attacks foreign emissaries in apparent plot to kill Boy-Who-Lived

Harry clutched the note from the Flamels. "Nicolas and Perenelle are okay," he said, his voice numb.

Ginny stared at him, her face horror-struck.

Hermione read aloud, "Terror has seized the United States as a group of at least 50 Death Eaters, along with You-Know-Who himself, laid siege to the Salem, Massachusetts Government Headquarters of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The death squad took the scene by surprise, apparating into a ball being held in honor of Nicolas and Perenelle Flamel, who are traveling the world appealing for aid in the fight against You-Know-Who. Oh no," she added in a whisper.

"The Flamels are reportedly very close to Harry Potter, who left school two weeks ago and went into hiding. Survivors of the attack in Salem claim that You-Know-Who and his Death Eaters were looking for the Boy-Who-Lived. Unfortunately, news that he returned to Hogwarts yesterday morning had not reached them, or perhaps this devastatingly gruesome attack might not have happened." Hermione looked up to him, her eyes wide. "Harry, it's not your fault."

Harry's face was stony while his insides whirled. "Who died?" he asked.

Hermione scanned the article, "Sixty-seven were wounded, including family members of government officials… According to Nymphadora Tonks—good, she's alive—the Flamels' bodyguards, with the help of Government security, were able to drive back the Death Eaters who held the Unicorn Lance Convention Hall, in the upper levels of the government building, under siege for four hours. Three of the bodyguards were killed… oh no!… including Fleur Delacour!"

Ginny gasped, "Oh, no! Bill!" There were tears in her eyes.

"Bloody hell," breathed Ron, aghast.

Hermione was shaking. "I—I can't," she stammered. Neville took the paper from her and continued to scan through it. Hermione buried her head in Harry's chest. Ron stood up and stormed off.

"Five Death Eaters were killed and another seven captured—four of which are in critical condition," continued Neville. "The Flamels, who recently destroyed the only known Sorcerer's Stone, were locked in a high-security room along with Salem Government President Elvira Solaris and several cabinet members. Nicolas and Perenelle Flamel had been in hiding since You-Know-Who's return, with the fear that should he access their knowledge regarding the creation of the Sorcerer's Stone, he would be unstoppable… um…" Neville paused as he turned the newspaper pages.

"Oh! Listen to this. Early reports indicate that this, the worst attack the wizarding world has seen since You-Know-Who's return, has hit the American Governments especially hard. They were not involved in the previous war against You-Know-Who, and were wavering in their decision to join a war so far from their borders. But since the attack yesterday, three of the five Governments have already scheduled a vote, and are appealing to their citizenry to aide the European battle against the 'monstrous Dark Lord capable of such appalling violence'…"

Harry was fingering the locket that Nicolas and Perenelle had given him before they left. He stood up suddenly and turned to the Hall. He wasn't sure if he was surprised or not when the Hall went silent around him. "DA meeting tonight at 7:00," he said very loudly. He made sure to slowly sweep the Slytherin table with his eyes so that they knew they too were included in the invitation. Then he exited the hall, his robes billowing out behind him.

XIXIX

The students seemed to drift through class that day in a shocked sort of stupor. With small attacks happening here and there throughout the United Kingdom, nearly every student knew someone who had been attacked. But thus far, Voldemort had kept to his pattern of "keeping the Ministry busy" with vandalism and mostly non-lethal attacks while the more serious attacks happened on the continent. The fact that the war was now worldwide, and the severity of the pictures and news accounts of the Salem attack, really hit the students hard. A muted fear seemed to have settled over the castle. Many students, rather than doodling or sleeping in their classes, were writing letters to family members and friends far away.

Dumbledore had apparently made an announcement after Harry left breakfast that the students were safe at Hogwarts, and reiterated the necessity of unity once again, but the halls of Hogwarts were unusually quiet as Harry made his way from class to class.

But something else bothered him as well. Ron was missing.

He had disappeared during breakfast, and had not been found in Gryffindor Tower. Nor did he attend any of the day's classes. He had been very obviously upset when he left that morning, but it was unlike him to disappear altogether.

Harry mentioned it to Dumbledore during lunch, but Dumbledore had said very calmly not to worry about Mr. Weasley, and Harry had understood why Snape always appeared to be annoyed whenever Dumbledore spoke.

The sixth-year Gryffindors were very quiet during dinner. Harry, Ginny, and Hermione stared at their plates and picked at their food, silently reminding themselves that Dumbledore had said not to worry. 'But,' Ginny thought bitterly, 'He also said that during Harry's absence, and Harry almost died.'

Harry took her hand and squeezed it. Ginny just stared at her plate.

Then Christopher slid into the seat across from them. "You guys hear about Snape?" he asked quietly.

"What about him?" asked Harry.

"Someone tried to kill him about an hour ago," said Christopher in a dull voice, clearly not enjoying the attempt on his least favorite professor's life.

Harry whipped his head around to the head table, and saw that Severus was missing from his normal seat, as was Dumbledore. He turned around and looked at the Slytherin table, and noticed that only about half of them were at dinner. Malfoy looked at him, his face blank.

"What happened?" Ginny was asking.

"Is he okay?" said Hermione.

"Yeah, he's okay. My friend Daena, in Ravenclaw, told me that her older brother Fabian was in Potions when four Slytherins came in and raised their wands against them—cast Crucio on Snape, and then attacked the class! But it was a Hufflepuff/Ravenclaw class, and most of them are in the DA so four people were really no match for them. It was just kind of a shock because the four Slytherins were all in the DA too. So it wasn't until after they started casting curses that anyone jumped to action."

"Who was it?" asked Harry.

"Well, that's the thing. They thought that it was John and Irving, those seventh year blokes, and Portia and Susannah in fifth year, but apparently, Snape had set up some wards around his Potions lab that nullified the effects of Polyjuice Potion—and within two minutes, they changed into four adult Death Eaters, with Dark Marks and all! But Snape and the class had them down in no time. I don't think anyone was even seriously hurt, except for the Death Eaters. Dumbledore took them to his office and supposedly the Minister himself is here with a team of Aurors."

Harry sat back and closed his eyes. He took a deep breath and attempted for the first time since he had regained consciousness to connect to Severus through their link. He found it surprisingly easy, and knew immediately that he was in his quarters with a large group of his students.

He stood up.

"Where are you going?" asked Christopher.

"I have to check on a friend," replied Harry. "I'll see you guys at the meeting."

He walked swiftly through the halls and to the dungeons, without stopping to consider what he was doing since he didn't want to think better of it. If Death Eaters were trying to assassinate Severus, the cat was out of the bag—so what would it matter if Harry openly visited his quarters? He wouldn't let his thoughts pass that point. He wouldn't let himself consider what it might matter.

In front of the stone serpent, he spoke in English, "I would like to see the professor."

"You are not a Slytherin student," said the serpent. "Is he expecting you?"

"Yes," hissed Harry in Parsletongue.

"Oh," said the serpent. It was silent for a moment, and then Severus opened the door.

"Mr. Potter," he said formally.

"Professor."

They stared at each other silently for several moments. Harry was aware of students craning their necks to see him.

'It was reckless for you to have come," thought Severus. 'Don't you ever bother thinking ahead?'

'Gryffindor to the last,' thought Harry. 'The students I cannot trust are all at dinner. I assume that means the students here are all on our side.'

Severus nodded once, acknowledging Harry's point. "Do come in," he said.

Harry walked in, looking around at the faces of at least three-dozen students who had come to show their support for their Head of House. Most of their faces were blank, but Harry saw suspicion, respect, and frank curiosity when he looked at them. The seats in the sitting area were all taken except for one, which Severus returned to. No one made a move to offer Harry a seat, which actually pleased Harry. They hardly knew him, but they didn't awe him with titles like "the Boy Who Lived". He would have to prove himself to them, and that made Harry feel normal.

"Professor, I just heard what happened, and I wanted to extend to you my concern and support."

"Thank you, Mr. Potter. That is very kind of you."

'Do they all know you were a Death Eater?' thought Harry.

'No, not all of them.'

Harry held his eye, looking for permission to carefully proceed with his intended conversation. Severus was silent for a moment more, but then nodded very slightly.

"Where are Portia, Susannah, John, and Irving?" The Slytherins were staring hard at him, trying to decipher if the concern in his voice was real.

"In the infirmary. They had been instructed under Imperius to be caught 'attempting to escape' after my death. But the curses broke when we apprehended the Death Eaters."

"Are they okay?"

"They will be, but they'll be questioned tonight by the Aurors."

Harry shook his head and sighed heavily. "You'd think they'd give them some time after such an ordeal."

"They're strong," snapped one student snidely.

"Of course they are," said Harry. "I've seen them in action in the DA. But I still think they deserve a rest after having Death Eaters cast Unforgivables on them." He shook his head again. "Death Eaters at Hogwarts," he said as if to himself, but loud enough for everyone to hear. "This war can't last."

"And what are you going to do about it?" sneered another student—Jane was her name—but Harry could tell she really wanted to know.

"I thought that was obvious," said Harry, looking surprised although he wasn't. "I'm going to kill Voldemort."

Many of them flinched at the name, but they stared strong at Harry as though they hadn't. Harry stood steady, returning their gazes.

Finally, Jane replied, "You have a lot of nerve saying that to this audience." Harry knew her, although they had never spoken. Her mother had died during the last war and her father was sent to Azkaban, leaving Jane to be raised by her aunt and uncle, whom she called Mum and Dad. They did not support Voldemort, but many among their network of family and friends did, so they largely remained silent. Her words were not a warning. They were a challenge against Harry's character.

Harry gave her a wry smile. "I don't buy the 'Slytherin equals Death Eater' line, so don't try selling it to me. It does no one any good to spout such divisive nonsense."

Several of the Slytherins eyed him suspiciously. Then, Millicent Bulstrode said, "You've changed."

Harry raised his eyebrows and nodded in agreement. "I've been getting that a lot lately."

"Why are you here, anyway?" asked one of the younger students, a third year named Cynthia.

Harry turned to her. "Professor Snape," he said, nodding to him, "Was attacked by Death Eaters because he made a choice to stand against Voldemort. I'm here for the same reason you're here—to show my support."

"But you're a Gryffindor," she persisted.

"I'm a Hogwarts student," said Harry. "And I've spent a lot of time scrubbing the Professor's floors in detention. I've kind of gotten used to him."

Several of the students laughed tentatively, glancing at Severus, whose face remained unreadable.

"The storm is brewing," said Harry. "And we have got to stick together on this, or when it hits, it will be devastation the likes of which we have never seen before. The time for House rivalries and petty grudges is over. It's time we stand together—one school, one front."

"Behind you? Against the Dark Lord?" asked Millicent warily.

Harry shook his head. "Beside me. Unlike Voldemort, I don't require servants. I'm looking for allies." He eyed the Slytherins steadily, clearly indicating he saw allies in the room.

"During the DA meeting tonight, we are going to discuss the reality of the war in regards to our training. You are all invited to attend, or to wait until the regularly scheduled Thursday meeting if you desire. Professor," Harry turned to Severus and inclined his head, "It is good to see you well. Thank you for allowing me to speak."

Severus stood up and crossed over to Harry, his hand extended. Harry took it and they shook firmly. "Mr. Potter, thank you for coming." He walked Harry to the door.

Walking to the Room of Requirement, Harry couldn't help but be concerned that Malfoy had chosen not to visit his godfather this evening. Those who intended to become Death Eaters, and those who were still not sure or who were too afraid to do otherwise, had all gone to dinner rather than sit with their Head of House. Harry could only assume it was because Severus was now officially a traitor. It bothered Harry that Malfoy would not go to him.

He, Ginny, and Hermione sat together as the DA arrived for their meeting. They watched the door intently, but Ron did not pass through it, and the three felt as though a dark cloud was pressing down on them.

Malfoy came, with Pansy, Crabbe and Goyle. Several other Slytherins also arrived—all of whom Harry knew were watching him for Voldemort. The Slytherin DA members on Harry's 'side' were all either in the infirmary or in Severus' quarters. Harry watched Malfoy, but the blonde did not make eye contact.

When it seemed as though more or less the entire DA had arrived, Harry stood up to speak, and the room grew quiet.

"It's terrible times we live in," he said swiftly, his voice thick with the seriousness of his words. "If this war hasn't yet touched everyone in this room, it will. The more time that passes, the more dangerous things become. And it will continue as such until Voldemort is gone."

Several students gasped. Harry waited patiently until there was silence once more.

"Dumbledore's Army began because incompetence was threatening our academic standing, but more importantly, our Defense education. The truth is that we are in danger because of the times we live in, but ignorance increases that danger. So here is some more truth for you:

"Voldemort has staged and perpetrated the worst attack the world has seen since his return. Many people were wounded and killed, including a friend of mine. Then this afternoon, four Death Eaters entered Hogwarts disguised as students and attempted to murder Professor Snape. The Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff fourth years were able to subdue the attackers, and we owe them our gratitude and respect."

Harry placed his hand over his heart and bowed sincerely to each of them as the room thundered in applause.

Harry waited for the noise to subside.

"It is time for everyone to face the fact that what we are doing here is practicing for the battles ahead. When this war touches us, we must be ready, and we must stand—a united front—against anything and everything that comes against us. Now is the time to make choices. We must choose to be prepared. We must choose to stand strong. We must choose our allies."

The door opened and everyone turned to see a stream of several dozen Slytherins enter. Harry smiled slightly, his face set with determination.

The newcomers filed through the crowd to where Harry stood, and one by one, reached out and shook his hand. Harry caught each of their eyes, welcoming them. The rest of the DA made room for them to sit.

Harry said, "I want to extend a special welcome to the newest members of the DA. They are part of us now, and are to be treated, and protected, as such." He paused to allow the significance of his words to settle in.

When he continued, he looked to the group of Slytherin 'spies'. "It is time to choose sides in this war." He looked into each of their eyes in turn. They all looked away, except for Malfoy who had not yet met his eye.

"It is time to choose your path. Those of you who wish to defend yourselves, come to the regularly scheduled meetings for training, dueling, and platoon scrimmages. Those who want to be ready for the reality of war, respond to the 'galleon calls' on the weekends. This training is optional. This training indicates a willingness to fight should there be a large-scale attack at Hogwarts. This training is not for defense. This training is for war.

"It's dangerous times we live in," he repeated. "But I choose to live."

He scanned his eyes across the room and yelled, "This is our life! This is our time! It is time we stand and fight the greatest evil of our time!" The room roared. "We will not cower in fear! We will fight!"

XIXIX

Harry and Ginny spent the next few hours talking with the DA. Everyone had their concerns—their stories of loved ones who had been attacked. Harry listened to them all, and urged each of them to remain strong since Voldemort's greatest weapon was fear.

Malfoy did catch Harry's eye before he left, and Harry nodded slightly to indicate he understood and would meet him tonight.

Finally, after everyone had left, Harry, Ginny, and Hermione headed back to Gryffindor Tower. When they climbed through the portrait hole, the first thing they noticed was their redheaded friend sitting in a large squashy chair, staring sullenly into the fire.

"Ron!"

Hermione ran to him, jumped into the chair with him and flung her arms around him.

"Don't you ever do that again! We were so worried. We didn't know what happened."

Run hugged her back, tightly. "It's okay, 'Mione. It's all okay."

Harry and Ginny took seats next to them.

"Where were you?" asked Ginny sternly.

Ron brushed Hermione's hair out of his face. "I was at Hagrid's, writing to Bill."

Hermione sat back. "All day?"

Ron nodded. "I wasn't sure what to say. Hagrid let me stay there while he taught class. I spent most of the day talking to Fang while I sorted out my thoughts." He smiled weakly at Hermione, but then turned back to the fire, his eyes drawn with sadness.

"Are you okay?" asked Harry in a very quiet voice.

Ron shook his head, and began to quietly ramble. "Bill told me over the summer that he and Fleur were going to get married after the war." Ginny put her hand over her mouth. She had not known. "He said he's been in love with her since the first time he saw her—and not like the Veela-infatuation that most guys get—it was all Fleur. And he knew her so well. He told me everything about her. And I guess I just kind of feel…" He swallowed hard, and a tear escaped his left eye and dripped down the side of his face.

"It's this fucking war. Like there wasn't enough shit to deal with in life, this fucking Dark Lord has to come and start killing people, and now Bill's lost the person he was going to spend his life with, and I can only imagine his pain right now—and Hermione, I love you," he said suddenly, looking up at her. "I don't know what I'd ever do if I lost you. I've loved you since the first time I saw you, and I was such a brat our first year, and I was just a big arse about you and Victor, and I'm sorry I ever made fun of you about your studies, and about the House Elves. I just—I've wasted all this time trying to hide from my real feelings when I should have just told you everyday that you're the only woman I'll ever want to be with and—"

Hermione cut him off with a kiss. Then they buried their faces in each other's necks and with all of Hermione's hair, Harry couldn't tell if they were laughing or crying or both. But they held to each other in a death grip, very gently rocking as they whispered to each other inaudibly.

Ginny grabbed Harry's hand and tugged him away. At the foot of the stairs to the girls' dormitory, Ginny whispered, "Do you think Malfoy has an answer for you?"

"I don't know. Maybe." He caught her eye and asked seriously, "Are you okay with me going to him tonight?"

Ginny shrugged and looked away. "You love him. You gotta try." She looked back to him and asked, "But will you be okay if it's not the answer you want?"

Harry breathed deeply, knowing he should consider the possibility, but then he shook his head. "It will be."

He retrieved his invisibility cloak and headed out to the lake. Malfoy was not yet there, so Harry laid himself out so that he could watch the stars. He expanded his consciousness to feel the world around him, grounding himself with the energies of the earth, steadying himself with the lake, breathing deeply the air. He knew he would need to be relaxed when he went to bed tonight.

Awhile later, he felt Malfoy approaching. He sat up and closed his eyes in anticipation. Malfoy sat next to him.

"Some speech," he said dryly.

"I thought you'd enjoy it," said Harry, his eyes still shut.

"Was it the same speech you made in Snape's private chambers?"

Harry shook his head. "Different audience. Different speech."

"How did you know where to go? You're not in Slytherin." Harry tried not to smile at the hint of anger and jealousy in Malfoy's voice.

"You'd be surprised what I know about this school," he said.

"Look at me!" snapped Malfoy. Harry turned to him and opened his eyes, taking him in. Malfoy was obviously very upset. "Is something going on between you and Snape?"

Harry regarded him evenly. "Why would you ask that?"

"He's been acting differently around you in class for some time. And while you were gone, he was very obviously worried. And last night you almost called him by his first name. And then the concern you showed when you heard he was attacked. And you knew where his rooms were! So what's going on?"

'Nothing I can trust you enough to tell you about,' thought Harry despondently. He said nothing.

Malfoy scowled. "Snape's a traitor now, and if the Dark Lord knows enough to want to kill him, I don't see how it would be a problem for you to answer my question. Is there something going on between you two?"

"Why don't you ask him yourself?"

Harry knew he was going to touch a nerve when he said it, and indeed Malfoy's anger swelled until his face became stony and unreadable. He turned away from Harry and stared at the lake. Harry could just barely hear him taking very deep breaths.

Eventually, Malfoy asked, "Is he okay?"

"He appears to be."

Malfoy sighed heavily and dropped his head to his chest. "They tried to kill my godfather, and I can't go to him." He turned to Harry, his eyes mournful.

"You choose not to go to him," corrected Harry. "You are perfectly capable."

"You know what I mean!" shot Malfoy.

"And you know what I mean," said Harry. "Make the choice, Malfoy."

Malfoy got up angrily and stormed off, and Harry sighed.

"Maybe tomorrow," he said aloud.

He heard Ginny's sleepy voice in his head, 'He'll come around.'

"I hope so," said Harry.

'Goodnight, Harry," she thought, and Harry felt her drift off to sleep.

He lay back down and stared up at the stars once again, calming himself, and drawing energy into him, collecting his strength.

He eventually returned to Gryffindor Tower. All of his dorm mates were asleep as Harry very slowly and methodically prepared himself for bed. In his nightclothes, he sat on the edge of his four-poster, and filched through the drawer of his bedside table.

He pulled out one vial of the potion Perenelle and Severus had prepared for him. They would both kill him if they knew what he was about to do, but in the last twenty-four hours, Voldemort had tried to kill both of them.

Harry knew his mind was still a mess. He knew that he was still trying to sort himself out after the possession. He also knew the stakes were higher now, and he couldn't wait another couple of weeks to find out what else Voldemort was planning.

He drained the vial in one swallow, put his glasses on the table, lay down, and went to sleep.

XIXIX

XIX

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A/N: Special kick-ass thanks to my betas, CS Whitewolf and VirginSuicide, who both rock beyond belief! Everyone, please take a moment of your time to whisper thanks to them through your monitor. I'm sure they'll hear you. Really.

And thank you for reading! Please review!

Nation El-Diablo: Um, you say mayhem is sanity-challenged? Yeah, well, glad you liked the chapter. Have fun climbing lampposts!

Rowenna7: Pardon your French. And Spanish. And um, English. Glad you liked!

Raintlykalopsic: You know, now that you mention it, it would have been tragic if Harry had lost Sev and Ginny because of jealousy-spurned-lover-heartache stuff. Because they are way-cool and very good for Harry.

Brenna8: Hurray for ferret sweetie! Yay!

Slice: Okay, um, don't be mad then after this chapter. They're not really broken up, they're just having issues right now, and kind of stagnated until Malfoy figures out what he wants to do, and actually goes about doing it. So don't go off on some rant about how you're distraught over Malfoy storming off and therefore Sev should shag Madam Pomfrey, alright?

DracoLuciusLover: Ooh, you bad! But hey, enjoy yourself, yo! Glad you like the chapter.

SheWolfe7: Well, there's the offer, and the Legilimency attempt is coming up next chapter. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Mayhem El-Diablo: Okay, then tell me what your names reference, because I'm curious. Ginny's sorting through her things, and I'd say she's doing a rather good job of it. But a "I need time alone" here and there is to be expected.

Shania Maxwell- Ooh! You must have loved Harry leaving the Great Hall, then, with his robes billowing! Mini-Snape indeed!

Liber-Creperum-Liber Diabolus: Hey! Glad you liked it. And I'm not scared, and that's all that matters, right? Me? Right? I'm all that matters?

Elebereth: Why thank you!

Wintermoon2: Boo… I don't like it when you have bad days. Sadness. But I'm glad my chapter helped at least somewhat. And yeah, Harry and Sev may one day pursue the topic further, but I don't think either of them are ready for that just yet. So snippets of admittance are about as good as we're going to get for now. Glad you liked the pensieve bit. I was worried about that- wondering what it might feel like to do that, how it would work and all of that. So I'm glad I got your approval!

DracoInaRaincoat: Hey! I'm glad you like it. I do my best, yo.

Beth: Glad you liked the chapter- and even brought it to work! Rock! That makes me happy. And I'm glad the cute/awkwardness came across well with Sev and Harry. I really try to keep their relationship (well, all of the relationships) interesting. So I'm glad theirs is still working.

Isis-mystic: Me too! But they still got some bumps ahead.

Dedmun: A must-read? Really! Aw, I'm swooning! Thank you!

Yukari: A take it that was a good day for you, then? Glad you liked it!

Silent-sounds: Squeals! Awesome. Thank you.

Pure Black: Hmm, I see your point. Other than Harry having gone and fallen in love, I totally agree with you- because Draco's in danger now with the situation he's put himself into. And he can put Harry in danger, but I don't think that's his intention- and Harry doesn't think it is either, which is why he's gone back to him. I'm still hoping Draco will get his head out of his arse, though.

Nemati: Why, thank you!

Takuto-kun: I can dig, although in the official JK stories, I kind of hope Ginny and Harry wind up together (because I'm pretty sure she's not going to hook him up with Draco or Sev). And I most definitely will go on. Thank you.

Hayley: Yeah, I think he's just tired of all the secrets and double lives. Not so much willing to put up with it anymore.

Relle: That's fine, sit in the corner and pout all you want! Me and Ginny and Sev are gonna go eat some CANDY! MMmmm…. candy… tasty. Would Relle like some candy? Hmm? Tasty tasty!

Devils-fire: Yay! Thank you!

The Great Sarini: Thank you, I do appreciate it. And good luck with your thesis! You got my respect. I'm scared of grad school.

Kiki: One word- handkerchief. :) oh, and thank you!

Driven to insanity: Yay! Glad you like. As for why Harry and Draco call each other Potter and Malfoy, well, I have to say I'm glad you asked- because it was one of the first things I decided about this story when I first decided to write it. When I was in high school, I dated Chipmunk, Hootie, Nu, Brandon, Brez, Dream, Paul, Flip, and Prentup. (Yes, I was one of those girls who had a new boyfriend as soon as the old one was gone). Anyway, they called me Hermy, Destiny, Destiny, Kati, Hermy, Kitten, Kati, Kati, and Herms, respectively. The point being that if we already had nicknames for each other, we continued with those nicknames. It was kind of a symbol of our closeness that we had them, and I never once felt distanced from them because if they didn't call me Kati. And the only one I ever talked to about it said that he liked it that I still called him Brez, instead of using his first name like most girls did. So that's why. I'm just drawing from my own experiences. I thought it was more poignant for Mr. Potter and Professor Snape to become Harry and Severus, because that counteracts the professional distance they had had.

Emiline: Ah, gotcha. And Snape's got budding romantic feelings for him. And thank you. I'm glad my writing is improving. And glad to find another fellow Snape liker.

Chaos-Chick3 (Chapter 1): Are they red and gold? I'll have to go fix that! Like I said, always let me know stuff like that- I'm working on memory here! Thanks!

B: Welcome back to the living! You're looking well.

Wyall Jared: Thank you!

Dragenphly: True dat. Twincest- yech! Hmm, good call about adding in more about the lessons. I'll see what I can do, but, um, it's getting kind of late in the story now. Thanks!

Bridge: Hey! If you ever get this far, good luck with your story!

Maxie: Yay! Edge of your seat! Yay! Thank you!

Mourning Dove: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You reviewed SIX days after my last update, and you're already complaining about the wait! I'm only part human, for Merlin's sake! There's only so much I can do so quickly! And OOH! I made you a H/S convert! Whoopee! You wouldn't have minded… okay, ahem… Severus leaned in and pressed his lips to Harry's. A soft moan escaped… um I better clarify that that's not a tease from next chapter, or else my readers will have my head when it's not there. And repentant Draco- I didn't want to put any of that in until Draco was actually saying it. This fic is not from his point of view, so if I said what he was thinking, it would just be weird. But I'm glad you like the story. Please keep reading.

Chaos-chick3: No! I haven't read his stories. You would recommend them, I presume? Where should I start? What are the titles, etc.? Glad you like the story. Makes me happy. And thanks for the SW,SH review! It's the first I've gotten on that one. I'm thinking of re-writing the summary so that people know what sickness lays within. Then maybe they'll read it, right? ;)

Tygressatheart: No apologies. I love hyper reviews. They make me giggle. But thank you muchly. And give Draco some time. It's hard for him what he's going through. And I agree that having Sev's feelings for him will probably strengthen their relationship. And um, did you mean friendship between Ginny and Hermione, or "friendship" between Ginny and Hermione? Just curious, yo. Thanks for the review.

LCM: Thank you. And don't worry about Harry getting too many new powers, unless you think he has too many already. I know it's hard to tell with chapter updates on-line (you can't see how many pages are left), but we're getting down to the wire here. The shit is already starting to hit the fan, so Harry really doesn't have much time at this point to discover anymore powers. But I have consciously tried to balance any powers he gets with hardships (control issues, magical shock, emotional hurts and feeling so separated from everyone, losing himself, etc.), because I agree- it is very boring when there is unlimited power to draw from with no 'cost', so to speak. And about the gay sex thing- as a matter of fact, I do know how it works. I didn't really want to get into the icky details (and even though I'm a girl, I do know what those icky details are)- preferring to airbrush it over. It's not just because of the R rating, although that is part of it. It's also because I don't feel that graphic writing fits in with the style that I'm using for this story. I'm thinking now that you're specifically referring to the Chapter 18 sex scene, and not so much the others, because I was kind of thinking when I wrote that that I was making it too "easy", but I wanted to focus on the words being said more than what was being done. So let me ask you- by trying to keep my language from being distracting, am I inadvertently being distracting with inaccurate descriptions? Should I go back and revise? Pardon the long response, but I get few reviews that actually offer criticism, which compels me to jump on them for more.

Sweet-Dreams2: Thanks!

Teira: Thank you for staying up so late to read my story! I am honored! I'm glad you like the character balance and the magic theories. Hope you continue to enjoy!

tWiSt3d: And thank you for sacrificing the feeling in your arse to read my story! I am equally honored! And hang on for Harry/Draco. They really need some support right now, going through a tough time, as it is.