Disclaimer: I do not own PMK.

Chapter 4: Troubled Waters

"What did you say?" Hijitaka almost dropped his chopsticks. The mess hall was silent. Everyone present had their attention focused on the famous Demon of the Shinsengumi and his page. Okita-san, what advice did you give him this round? Tatsu groaned and tried to shrink out of sight. Okita was not around to witness the impeding storm, having retreated to the kitchen for more rice. O sure...

Taking a deep breath, Tetsu repeated his request. "I want to go after Saya. She left Kyoto for the north three days ago. With speed, I should be able to catch up..." What next? Hijitaka fixed him with a glare. "Permission for leave denied!" Stupid boy! After all the trouble to become a taishi, he's gonna blow his chances by going after some girl he's sweet on...

"Hijitaka-san!" Tetsu pleaded. It's just some puppy-love, boy will forget about her in a week. Hijitaka didn't even bother to look at the teary-eyed Tetsu. "Go back to your seat, boy. This is an order!" With a sigh, Tetsu dragged himself back to his seat. He looked at his breakfast but wasn't really hungry.

"Toshi! That was mean of you!" Everyone turned to see a very angry Okita storm into the hall. Okita had overheard everything. A few of the taishi discretely moved themselves and their breakfast trays. When Okita's in such a mood, there's bound to be trouble.

"Can't you see Tetsu's serious? Just let him see her one time before she goes up north. With a good horse, it'd take him a day or so to catch up! Come on...can't you understand how he feels about Saya?" Okita faced Hijitaka.

"Enough, Souji. A childish crush, that's all there is to it," Hijitaka snorted.

"It's not just a childish crush," Okita spoke quietly. "Saya had to leave without giving Tetsu a chance to say goodbye. Let's put it this way, Hijitaka-san, how would you feel if I were to leave..."

The slap that followed echoed through the mess hall. Okita was totally taken by surprise and knocked off his feet. He fell crashing onto Shinapachi's breakfast tray, much to the second captain's dismay. Hijitaka had actually hit him. Both men faced each other without speaking.

Hijitaka was white-faced with anger. The tension gripped his shoulders tightly as he towered above Okita. Okita was sprawled on the tatami amidst the scattered remains of Shinpachi's breakfast. He bled from a cut lip as he looked at Hijitaka with a mix of disbelief and hurt. Gravy stained his yutaka and hair. Okita-san, Tetsu wanted to rush over but Tatsu firmly held him back. Finally, Hijitaka spoke. "Souji, that was long overdue. You've been most irresponsible in your conduct all this while. Let me remind you..."

"As a taishi, you are to carry out your duties according to the code of bushido and never, ever neglect them at any cost!" Okita finished for him and left the hall, brushing bits of rice from his hair. The taishi returned to their morning meal in uneasy silence. Shinpachi called for another breakfast set. Hijitaka glanced about to find that the Ichimura brothers had gone.

He had actually hit Souji. Hijitaka sighed. And in front of the men too. He had lost his appetite for breakfast.

Okita washed his cut lip gingerly. That was the least of his worries. Toshi was right, he always is. He coughed. He really shouldn't get so worked up. The coughing eased just as the Ichimuras came around the corner.

"Okita-san, are you hurt?" Okita shook his head. "Okita-san, I'm sorry I got you into trouble," Tetsu fidgeted. Okita smiled. "It's alright. I've been a naughty boy all this while. Toshi's probably regretting not spanking me when I was younger." Okita ruffled the boy's red hair. "Let's try San-nan..." He glanced at Tatsu with a wink. Tatsu groaned.

"Yamanami-kun?" Akesato was very surprised to see him. "The bill for last night's party has already been sent..." Yamanami raised his hand to stop her from continuing. "Akesato-san, I'm really sorry to bother you at this early hour..."

It wasn't that early. It was fast approaching midday. However, for Akesato, day starts in the late afternoon. Now, she's a bit groggy from sleep. Her hair was undone and flowed like silk over her very plain sleeping kimono. "I'm asking about Tetsu-kun, and Saya."

Akesato nodded. "Wait till I'm dressed." She disappeared from the balcony into her room. She emerged from the building wearing an elegant kimono with her hair neatly coiffed a short while later. Yamanami listened patiently as they strolled among the willows. They stopped by the bridge.

"Akesato-san," Yamanami frowned. "Why did you let her go with the merchant?" Surely Akesato out of all people should know the depth of the bond between those two young ones. It may be as deep as the one they shared...

"Why shouldn't I?" Akesato countered. "It's her chance to leave Shimabara. I know this sounds cruel. But Yamanami-kun, I don't want Saya to be trapped in this...floating world. She's like a little sister to me. She deserves better..." I don't want Saya to be part of my lie. She almost let it out. All those years of maintaining an illusion...living a lie.

"What about her love for Tetsu-kun?" Akesato studied his earnest face. Should she? Was he part of the lie she had created. Surely the look in his eyes is true enough, as is the gentleness with which he took her hand in his. "What about my love for you, Akesato-san? Please..."

"We've been over this before," she drew her hand back. "You know full well it's too late for me. But it isn't too late for Saya-chan to start a new life. She'll be a merchant's daughter with a family to love and care for her...in time, a respectable marriage and children. Believe me, I'm sorry about Tetsu. Tell him..."

"To be happy for her sake?" He retorted. Akesato glared fiercely at him.

"You should know what I mean!" With that, she turned and made her way back, fighting to hold back her tears. He watched her leave and hated himself for hurting her.

Again he had broached that topic. Society will never accept Akesato as his wife, however much he may wish it. Samurai men married decent girls from proper families, definitely not girls from Shimabara. At the most, she will be his mistress, if he can afford to keep her. Mistresses led a tenacious existence. Men often discarded them in favor of younger and prettier faces. Akesato was trying to protect Saya from that cruel fact of life.

With a sigh, he recalled her perfume, kisses and her smile as they chatted late into the night while his companions are occupied elsewhere in the building. A night spent together, a walk taken together...They are all precious to him. Don't you know that, Akesato? You are special, my love...

Sadly for Saya and Tetsu, Saya must leave the city in order to start anew. They may still be in time to catch the merchant on the highway. Yamanami quickened his step. At least he'd try... It will be his way of redeeming the fruitless love between him and Akesato-san.

"Tetsu! There're other pretty girls out there! I'll introduce some to you!" Harada tried to cheer Tetsu up. Heisuke cringed at his friend's words. That's not the point, Sano-kun... Harada is blissfully ignorant. "Let's see there's Chidori-chan, Midori-chan...oh, did I mention Yuki-chan?"

"SANO!" Both Heisuke and Shinpachi yelled in exasperation. Ignoring the Trio, Tetsu grabbed the bucket and walked to the training hall where he began scrubbing the floor.

"TETSU! We're still at practice here!" An irate Hijitaka bellowed as he almost fell over the boy. Yamanami poked his head into the training hall just in time to stop Hijitaka from giving Tetsu a severe beating. "Fine! Take him!" Hijitaka was more than willing to lend Yamanami his page. Hang in there, Tetsu, with luck, we'll catch up to Saya-chan soon.

Tatsu waited at the gate with their luggage. Yamanami had suddenly recalled some urgent business up north and ordered both Ichimura brothers to accompany him, a most peculiar choice indeed.

Author's notes:

Thanks for the reviews. Tetsu's going after Saya-chan now...but some of the 'steady' pairs seem to be facing some stress. Souji's fallen out with Toshi. Akesato with Yamanami.