Counterpart to the first song, Hero. This one is Fallen, from Bianca's perspective instead. Enjoy!

Heaven bent to take my hand
And lead me through the fire
Be the long awaited answer
To a long and painful fight

My name is Bianca. I screwed up.

It started three years ago, at my initiation. My mom told me that on m eleventh birthday I would finally recieve my powers. I had been so excited for the day; planning everything, hardly able to wait another moment.

My eleventh birthday turned out to be the worst day of my life. My mom and I woke early and celebrated--went out to eat, had cake. And she gave me the most cherished atrifact in our family for a present: The Grimoire. I believed that I was important, to be given such responsibility.

Our initiation begins with that. And then we our given our first mission.

I slowly realized that I was not important. I was anything but. My powers were to be used to serve another. At this discovery I was frustrated, especially when my mother shimmered us to the underground. I'd take my first orders from a man called Wyatt. I was to murder a boy named Christopher Halliwell.

Truth be told I've tried my best
But somewhere along the way
I got caught up in all there was to offer
And the cost was so much more than I could bear

"Mom...what do you feel when you murder somebody?" I'd asked, tears threatening to fall from my cheeks.

She'd wiped the tears away, struggling to speak. She seemed to be battling answers in her mind. "Nothing," she said softly after a moment. "You feel nothing."

I nodded. "Where is the boy?"

"It's your job to figure that. You must sense for your victim as a part of your initiation. Here is his picture." Lynn caressed her daughter's cheek. "I can't believe you're all grown up now. It's...a definite change."

But she never said "good change." She saw the disappointment in my eyes. The life of a phoenix would always be under a master's control--and here I was, the independant, fierce, strong-willed girl I'd grown to be, stuck in this world.

I closed my eyes and shimmered to where I sensed him.

Though I've tried, I've fallen
I have sunk so low
I'm messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so

I never could kill the boy. Christopher Halliwell. Oh, I had many opportunities to do so. He was so vulnerable. He was so trusting, so naive. So...so kind, so warm. Funny, smart, happy, strong. Everything I'd ever wanted. And he let me be independant as I'd always wanted to be.

See, with Chris I had freedom--the one thing I craved. With Chris I had true love, something I thought I'd never have as a phoenix. Our first kiss was my thireenth birthday--my mother had so heartily disapproved. She, of course, had grown as attached to Chris as I had. We both loved him. She loved him as the mother he'd nver had, since he was generally ignored around home.

But she kept telling me that the more I got into this relationship, the more that was at stake. I knew she was right, but I didn't listen.

Chris' life was twisted. His brother was an evil tyrant (that wanted him killed--but only I knew that). His father was delusional under the power of the elders, brainwashed to hate and hurt his second son. He lost his cousin, Mel, to Wyatt, and he was forced to take care of his three remaining cousins as his grief-stricken aunts searched for the perpetrator. And Chris took the blame from Leo.

But he was always happy for me.

We all begin with good intent
Love was raw and young
We believed that we could change ourselves
The past can be undone
But we carry on our backs the burden
Time always reveals
In the lonely light of morning
In the wound that would not heal
It's the bitter taste of losing everything
That I've held so dear

It became apparent that I'd forgotten the mission on his fourteenth birthday. "I love you," I'd whispered to him impulsively. Instantly I regretted the words. What if he didn't feel the same?

But he looked up at me with those sparkling green eyes and told me, "I love you, too. You're...the best thing that's ever happened to me."

And we kissed.

That afternoon I was summoned by Wyatt. "You have failed to kill the boy," he yelled. "You are a disgracce to your kind!"

The words meant nothing to me. I loved Chris. I'd do anything for him. My "kind" was no longer an issue.

"Look," he said between clenched teeth. "Either you kill his mother and aunts by nightfall...or I kill him. And there will be nothing you can do about it."

I've fallen
I have sunk so low
I'm messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so, no..

I didn't want to kill them, but I had no choice. There was a part of me that knew that Chris would never forgive me, that we'd never be happy. But most of me ws trapped in this fantasy world where everything would be all right. Everything would be okay.

After I stabbed her, I heard footsteps. I froze in place. I'd never murdered anyone before. My mom had been wrong. After your first murder...life would never be th same.

The look of fury, betrayal, woe, and terror radiated through his eyes. Tears that threatened to fall were quickly brushed away as he yelled in anger, shaking terribly. Finally I shimmered out, and he orbed as well.

Now I know that in killing his aunts and mother I have only worsened his burden. He is trying to raise little Cassie, Catty, Prue and Andy on his own. Cassie and Catty, Paige's twins, only three; Prue, his own four-year-old sister; and Andy, Phoebe's six-year-old son. (Sorry--I forgot Catty in the last chappie!) And then there was Mel...the one Wyatt killed. She'd be eight. Andy's older sister.

He teaches them well. I've been watching...through his pain and turmoil. He's trying hard, so hard. He is hurt, but never shows it. Bruises are harder to hide than feelings, though. Sooner or later that spell Leo's under will do more than harm Chris.

And I'll be waiting. Waiting to save him.

Heaven bent to take my hand
I have nowhere left to turn
I've lost to those I thought were friends
To everyone I know
Oh they turned their heads embarrassed
Pretend that they don't see
But it's one missed step
You'll slip before you know it
And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed

He sits awake now, exhausted yet unable to sleep. I watch him, invisible by a spell, in the foyer. He watches the little ones sleep. I wish I could go back in time and make this never happen. I wish that I wasn't a phoenix. I wish...

I wish I had my Chris, my freedom, my love, back.

He is too hurt to forgive. I will have to wait longer. But it isn't easy to hide from Wyatt...he'll spot me sooner or later, leaving Chris wide open and vulnerable. I smile as he finally stretches his arms out and leans back into the chair, closing his eyes.

And stirs, frowning in his sleep.

Though I've tried, I've fallen
I have sunk so low
I'm messed up
Better I should know
So don't come round here
And tell me I told you so, no..
I'm messed up
Better I should know
But don't come round here...

I suppose there was a time I was in his dreams.

Now I'm in his nightmares.

And tell me I told you so.

So, what do you think? I may continue it. I dunno. This idea was kind of a spur-of-the-moment thing, but you never know....

Thanks for all the lovely reviews! BRING ON THE COOKIES!! Lol, just are not necessay, just YUMMIFUL.

-Pink-Charmed-One-