Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or the related trademarks mentioned. The characters, moves, and all related trademarks are property of their respective owners. This is just a giant parody using different anime and video game references. Please don't sue me I have no money.
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The war continues...
Prelude to Chaos 2: The Straight Arrow
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Many legends and prophecies talk about a dark sword that rises up to pierce the heavens. That from this weapon of darkness, insurmountable horrors would arise and wreck havoc not only on earth, but in heaven as well. Whether he was inspired by this dark prophecy, or he IS the dark prophecy is unknown. For in this malevolent structure, he fulfills the prophecy to the very word. He creates unspeakable abominations. He strikes fear across the land. He challenges heaven without regret, worry or insanity. He is a weapon of darkness. One of the greatest alchemists, defiler of the laws of physics and most tainted mortal on Midgard. Welcome to the tower of Lezard Valeth.
His tower stands tall as the epicenter of a giant swamp. He had rebuilt it after Ragnarok was done. With his newfound power, he was enjoying himself fully. Untouchable by Valhalla, feared by Nifilhiem, he bows to no higher power. Some of the gods and immortals respect him for his vast knowledge and immeasurable power. Others just try to forget about him, treating him like a bad dream. Of course, he doesn't care. Though he may never achieve the woman of his covetous dreams or attain immortality, he has received a very...interesting consolation prize.
But now, the silent peace of the dark marsh is disturbed. A shining light flies across the sky. The luminous, blue, ball parts the darkness and foul smell of the swamp. It flies at its greatest speed, as if to escape the foul swamp. If it dares to tread in this untouchable ground, what does it seek?
It flies to the top of the tower and slows down. The light fades and a human-like figure comes to sight. Even with the few sparks of sunlight that pierces through the poisonous clouds, it reflects across her divine armor and bravely strikes the infinite grime. She acts like a mystical prism. For a while, she stands there, illuminated by her own light. Then she curls up, then jerks to bring out her wings. The searing white flame forming her wings is a testament to whom she is. Then, mysterious wisps fly out of her wings. Hundreds of them fly down to the tower's roof. The white wisps gather to make three human forms. With one last burst of light, the wisps create a human spirit. Valkyrie lands gracefully on her feet and faces her...companions.
"Well, that was an interesting ride." Replied the woman with the white hair and bondage armor.
"Beats trudging through the swamp." Says the blonde woman in the elegant battle garb.
"It a good thing that you know necromancy, Valentine." Remarks Valkyrie.
"Yeah...but...can we please have our bodies now?" requested of the young girl in the military suit. "Being ethereal makes me feel...creepy."
"All right Whip." Ivy begins muttering a chant. Soon, a dark circle appears around them. Somewhat energized by their location, Ivy unleashes more power than she anticipates. She unleashes another blinding light. As it fades, the three 'spirits' return to their human bodies.
"Very well. Let us get this over with." Cried a somewhat annoyed tone of Valkyrie. She strides down towards the black tower. "All of you keep up."
Whip whispers to Helena. "What's with her?"
"Oh, don't you know, in exchange for his services, Lenneth has to go on a date with Lezard!"
"WHAT?!"
...
The Valkyrie descends down the eerily familiar hallways with the other three girls.
"Apparently, he never strived to create a better tower. How typical for a mortal."
The three try to contain their laughter.
"I HEAR YOU!"
They burst into laughter.
"Such insolence! I don't know why I am even doing this!"
Ivy wipes her tears and approaches her offended comrade. "I'm sorry Lenneth. (haha) It's just that...I didn't think you would have to do this in order to employ him! What happened to all the riches Zam left us?"
"Gold is no object to this mortal. He can create them with his 'sciences.'"
"What about Zam's library? He is a magician too right?"
"He is content with the power he has now. He seeks nothing more."
"So...all...he...really...wants...is...you?
"Yes."
"No changing his mind?"
"No."
The three burst into laughter. If Valkyrie wasn't so stiff, a vein would pop out of her head.
"Hahahhahaha. Cheer up Lenneth-kun!" replies Whip. "Remember, it's for Zam."
The four girls remain silent.
"For Zam."
"For Zam."
"For Zam."
"For Zam. Let us go."
...
The three girls exit from an elevator.
"For a Norse alchemist, he sure is advanced." Remarks an impressed Helena.
"Come along." Says Lenneth. "He is beyond that teleporter."
The three come close. Then, they stop. They feel it. An evil power stirs all around them. He is planning something. A zombie dragon warrior materializes in front of them. Helena, Ivy and Whip get ready to fight. Lenneth stands in front, defiant.
"VALETH! WE HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR GAMES!" screams Lenneth.
She unsheathes her sword. In the other hand, her divine energy gathers. It forms her ethereal dragon spear. She hurls it at the mindless minion. The zombie raises its two swords to block. The spear explodes in front of it. The creature stands strong, resisting the force of the cleansing explosion. Just then, Valkyrie appears on above and slashes downward, while the explosion is happening, shattering the thing's swords. Staggering, the zombie is defenseless. Valkyrie gets ready for one, last, decisive strike.
"DEATH KNAVE!"
Valkyrie cuts through the dragon. Before, she would need a sword crafted by mortal to defeat this...conjuration. After inheriting Odin's power, she needs no such trinket. The pitiful creature turns back to the sands from which it was fabricated. She stands and sheathes her blade.
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" cries a voice that seems to be echoing throughout the entire castle. "Excellent! You are as beautiful and as powerful as ever...fair Valkyrie...Come then! I eagerly await your arrival!"
Reluctantly, the girls step on the magical circle. Two spears of light emerge. They form co-centric circles, one smaller than the other. The larger one extends while the other one shrinks. They are teleported to a new location. They are in a library. Books are scattered everywhere. The bookshelves are already full. Dozens of paper is scattered everywhere. Dozens of them are already opened. Some are ripped apart. Most are scattered and unused. There is light coming from the next room. They conclude that he is there.
...
They enter the room where the mysterious light is originating. They enter what appears to be a laboratory. Black boards covered in different scientific equations. Beakers containing different liquids of varying colors are displayed on every table. Mystical runes are etched everywhere. At the center of the room was a gigantic aquarium. In it was a creature that very much resembled Valkyrie. Long, luxurious blue hair. Slender, firm body. Fair, delicate skin. And a beautiful face. Standing next to it was he. His glasses reflected the light that the capsule was emitting. His ornamental garbs were neat, pressed and smelled distinctly of lotus. Even from across the room, it could be smelt. His black cape dangled across his shoulders, immobile, like a ravenous beat, stalking its prey. He stood there, smirking, unable to wipe the grin off his face. He was undoubtedly savoring this situation a little too much. It was almost mockery.
"Welcome, fair Valkyrie and her guests. It is a pleasure to have you, as always..." He spoke with a gentleman's tone. You would never suspect that this man was a raving megalomaniac ready to defy the heavens. He slowly approached them.
"I must say, I was quite surprised for the great Valkyrie ask a favor of me. ME! Her humble admirer. To be of service to her is my greatest honor."
Lenneth unsheathes her sword before he even comes near.
"No tricks Lezard!"
"Tricks? Why, I am shocked that you could think that of me, fair Valkyrie."
"We complete the homunculus before your payment."
"Fair enough. But do not call it 'payment.' I consider it more of a...privilege."
"Foul human...I never thought I would need one of the things you wrought..."
"HAHAHAHAHAHA! Indeed, who would have? But here you are. Asking for MY assistance...such folly of fate. Yet still, if this fools enjoy such fortunes of fate..." he extended his hand to touch Valkyrie. "Call me a slave to incompetence..."
Lenneth grabbed his arm before it even came close.
"I call you that even before this twist of fate. We finish the homunculus first. Then, we go." She began tightening her grip. He broke free and caressed his bruised arm.
"Heh. So be it then...Do you have the spirit?"
Ivy produced a blue crystal.
"May I...inspect it?" Lezard muttered as he came close. Just like Valkyrie, the crystal shone brightly and strongly. Lezard fumbled back. Everyone looked at him suspiciously.
"Forgive me..." he could sense an immense power from within that crystal. It was stronger than Valkyrie's power. What manner of being could possibly be stronger than a god? What puzzles him more is on how these being came to acquire such a powerful spirit. Since it was somewhat hostile to him, he can conclude that the spirit didn't go willingly. How could they have overpowered it? Unfortunately, Lezard was sure he wasn't going to get the answers. But the curiosity burns him. He seeks more knowledge. It was almost enough to give up his...soiree with Valkyrie to find out who...or what...is inside that crystal. Almost.
"I will need someone else to help me imbue the spirit into the homunculus." Stated Lezard. "Does anyone of you lovely ladies dabble in...arcane magic?"
"I know necromancy. I can help." Replied Ivy. "But...don't you have any...other homunculus? One that might be more similar to the spirit in this crystal?"
"hahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA! Do please forgive. But do please understand. These are my masterpieces, which I have crafted in the likeness of my...goddess." Lezard said with his malevolent smirk. "Without her inspiration, I could not create something so...perfect. Hence, I have no other homunculus that is as perfect as this, nor could I create one."
"So be it...I hope he doesn't mind..." replied Ivy.
Lezard stood on one side of the capsule and Ivy stood in the other, carrying the crystal. The two shut their eyes and raise their hands to face the capsule. A magical circle surrounded the three objects. Intricate runes were etched upon the circle. The crystal began levitating and moved towards the human like being, ever so painfully slow. Almost like a curious puppy. Both magicians knew that they had to be careful. The forbidden union of magic and science can bring forth the greatest results. Good AND bad. The circle intensified as Lezard's cape and Ivy's hair began flying. Great winds began emanating from the circle and creating a gigantic torrent. The remaining women began shielding their eyes to the immense power being displayed. Magical energy began leaking through their palms and surrounding the crystal and the capsule.
Lezard: Body of flesh...
Ivy: Crystalline soul...
Both: FUSE TOGETHER TO FORM A BEING WHOLE!
A flash of light. From the three windows of the lonely room, beams of light burst out of them. They flew fast and streaked across the malevolent swamps to the newly restored cities to the humble pastures. They were testament to a gargantuan power being displayed. There were tow general reactions to the beams of light: awe and fear. The last thing anyone could see in the lab was the crystal phasing through the glass of the capsule.
...
"It is done."
A silence continued to remain dominant. It seems everyone, save Lezard, could not believe what had happened.
"The creature you sealed in my precious homunculus will be ready anytime now. When it is, the machine will know and release it from the capsule. Now...as for my...'payment'?"
"Very well. Let us go...Lezard Valeth." It was in this precise moment she understood why Zam had asked her to wear a chastity belt on this particular day.
...
Energy flowed through the machine, turning the red circuitry blue. Screws began unscrew themselves as a thick mist was expelled from the capsule. The oxidized water began draining itself.
"This is it girls." Muttered Ivy as she eagerly anticipated the homunculius to come out. With a suspicious amount of anticipation though. Whip and Helena also seemed to eagerly await the homunculi release.
The water was fully drained and the glass lowered itself. The homunculus began opening her eyes. Her vision was still blurry and she was half asleep. She was jolted awake by the wires being violently removed from her back. She howls in pain as the wires rip themselves free of her. As the last wire rips itself out, she falls freely to the floor. She braces herself for impact. Her limbs are still numb, but she gets sufficient energy to raise her hands to protect her hands. In those few moments, the world was silent...
"NOW WHIP!"
The military girl unleashes her deadly, leather snake. She uses it to wrap around the homunculus's neck. Before she can fall to the ground, Whip jumps up, and passes through a wooden beam in the ceiling. As Whip lands to the ground, she suspends the girl by the neck in air before she can hit the ground. If she pulls any harder, she can choke the poor homunculus. By the malevolent glint in her eyes, it seems she has a similar intention. But she doesn't. She instead, ties her whip to a nearby hook and joins her companions facing the homunculus. Ivy steps forward to the writhing, suspended girl. She is confused, dumbfounded, disoriented and in a great amount of pain. She attempts to writhe away from the whip to escape. It is apparent to her that these three girls that they were going to hurt her. She knows nothing, except this fact. She would scream if she could. Ivy smirked a malevolent smile. She wishes to help the homunculus to get over her confusion.
"Welcome back...Sheo Darren."
That name instigates a flood of memories in the homunculus. So many memories rush into her. It is almost like torture. She remembers everything. She remembers that fateful 2 am where he wakes up and conceives "The Wedding Night," the fanfiction that started all this. She remembers on how his creation, Yuuki, went rogue and tried to overthrow him. She remembers the face of evil, Sho Tsuzuku. She remembers that glorious power, the will of the word. She remembers the epic battle, where he had to sacrifice himself. She remembers those seemingly endless days stuck in TarAUTHORus, not knowing if she was alive or not. She remembers how a lady in a beautiful blue armor brought him out of the damned place, only after sufficient convincing. She remembers being stuck as a spirit in the domain of his most hated enemy, Shou Town. And she remembers on how these three girls trapped him in one of the many 35-storey buildings and sealed him in a crystal. But most of all, she remembers her three girls...Tessa-chan. Ayanami-chan. And Kirika-san. The thought of these three girls calms her down. She recognizes the three OTHER girls in front of her.
"It seems you remember who you are."
"Ivy. Helena. Whip. What is happening?"
"Zam asked us to secure your body so that you may help in the defense of Shou Town. This was the only way. But now that you are awake..."
The three brought out dominatrix caps and wore them. Whip produced another whip. Helena brought out Lucy Liu's lasher from 'Charlie's Angels.' Ivy brought out some lit candles. The three began laughing maniacally.
"Oro? Whats so funny? You three are starting to scare me..."
"SILENCE SLAVE!" screamed Helena. "We didn't give you permission to speak!"
"It is time for you to pay for your crimes!" cried Whip in the same stern demeanor.
"What crimes?"
"Don't play stupid with us, you cur." Said a very agitated Ivy. "You will pay for plagiarizing Zam!"
"Oro?!"
"In one of your chapters, you copied and pasted one paragraph of Zams. You copied one of his hard worked paragraph, where he sought the innermost depths of his soul."
"But..."
"Where he stayed up late nights seeking the words that were most apt to his great ideas!"
"But..."
"Where he toiled through his computer's many problems with only his cigarettes to give him solace!"
"Demo..."
"You stole from him. You stole his precious sweat. And you will pay!"
"But all I did was copy the paragraph where he was insulting Ky..."
The three girls were taken back and disgusted.
"SO YOU CONFESS TO THE CRIME THEN!"
"But..."
"AND HOW DARE YOU BELITTLE ZAM'S WORK! YOU WILL SUFFER!"
"JUST WAIT A MINUTE! Is this one of Zam's orders as well?!" frankly, Sheo wouldn't be too surprised. Man. He really needs new friends.
"Well..." hesitated Ivy. "He told us to revive you. He didn't say anything after reviving you. So I guess its left to our...discretion." Smirked Ivy.
"NANI!"
"First we'll start with the candles, then the whipping and lashing at the same time. If were still bored, we can move on to the dildos..."
The three girls began laughing maniacally again and began telling him how bad each torture would be. She was terrified to hear what these three would do to her. As Ivy elaborately described each torture, she became desperate and tried to call for help. She was weakening fast, due to the fragrance that was laced around the whip. With her last strength...
"TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASKEEETEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
From the black skies of Lezard's marsh, a shooting star came out to heed the poor homunculus's cry...at 500 kilometers per second. A raging, blazing meteor came falling at a straight 90 degree angle and smashed the tower from the roof. A gigantic explosion once again disturbed the silence of the swamp.
KABOOM
...
Intermission. Perfect time to insert a shameless corporate plug.
"HI! I'm Lezard Valeth. A 90-degree meteor destroyed my tower but I'm not worried. Its because I have InSHOrance! Yes! With InSHOrance, the Shou Corp will pay for the damages dealt to my precious tower. Its more that enough to cover its reconstruction and replace my charred furniture! There's enough left for a vacation to Ashliana! I may be homeless for a while, but I don't mind. While its being rebuilt, I'll be hobnobbing with Darkness! And all it cost me was a couple of homunculuss for Sho Tsuzuku to use in his many porn films! So get InSHOrance! You can really afford it, especially with their new monthly porn payment! Secure your future! Get InSHOrance now!
InSHOrance covers many aspects. There is tower InSHOrance, home InSHOrance, car InSHOrance, gundam InSHOrance, sacred weapon InSHOrance, education InSHOrance and health InSHOrance. InSHOrance covers everything from earthquakes to tornadoes, missile attacks to being stepped on by a gundam, atomic bombs to dragon slaves. InSHOrance makes sure noting bad happens to your loved ones and prized possessions. So get it now! Are YOU InSHOred? InSHOrance is brought to you by the good people of Shou Corp. Shou Corp., ensuring good living and corporate control.
End Intermission
...
Sheo woke up in a hospital room. He stood up and blinked. His vision was blurry. He reached out to the bedside table and felt his glasses. He wore them, with a hint of confusion. He stared out the window to know where he was. It was an all too familiar site. He knew for a fact that he was in Shou Town. Was that incident in Lezard's tower a dream? No. It wasn't. There were two proofs. First one was when he looked at his hand. It wasn't ghostly and ethereal it was solid. He wasn't a wandering spirit anymore he had gained physical form. The second one was when he felt his chest. He somehow knew this was true as well. There was a vanity mirror in the room. As he stared at it, he couldn't believe his eyes. Where he should have seen himself, a short, curly, black haired boy whose eyes couldn't be seen due to the glare of his glasses, stood a long beautiful woman. Her body was sculpted perfectly and her long blue hair flowed majestically. He stared into her own eyes, still in disbelief. Just then, a man came into the room. He was dressed in a formal business suit carrying a backpack.
"Ah. Your awake Sheo."
She stared at the man who entered. Somehow, Sho has a knack for popping up when the trouble has passed. Stupid power of convenience.
"Sho...would you mind explaining to me what has happened?"
"Very well then. Do you still remember the 'Shou Town exodus'?"
"If you are referring to that flash of light and us ending up in a whole new dimension then yes."
"Yes. Well, after Zam brought you out of TarAUTHORus, he secretly devised a way for you to be able to join the mortal realm once again since you are nothing more but a nuisance as a spirit. So, he collaborated with the alchemist Lezard Valeth to construct a homunculus for you and, using the same sealing soul technique he and Mystina used on Lenneth Valkyrie, fused your soul into the homunculus, giving you a human form."
"That explains why Ivy sealed me into a crystal. But, why am I in a girl's body?"
"Lezard doesn't know how to make male homunculus. So we had to make do with what we had."
"Okay. Now for the more important question...WHY?!"
"Sheo, Sheo, Sheo. Though it pains me to admit it. We need your help. Do you think Plave, Tyr, DD and myself could take on the hexagon? Were already in a handicap due to Zam's flight!"
Sheo stared at her image once more.
"But, without...I still cant use the will and the word outside of my universe...I'm pretty much generic everywhere else. Whether it be yours, Zams or anyone else's universe."
Sho smirked. "I've taken care of that."
Sheo stared at Sho. Sho threw the backpack he was carrying to Sheo.
"I've worked E-patsu to the bone trying to convert your natural energy to create the will and the word. He went into a coma, but was able to produce this instead."
"What is this?"
"That's the Will and the Word backpack or the WWBP. To anyone, that is just an ordinary backpack. But in your arms..." Sho smirked. "Try puling something out."
Sheo reached in and pulled out a mirror?
"Okay, why is there a mirror here?"
Sho's smile grew larger.
"That backpack was empty."
"Huh?" Sheo starred at it once again. It was an empty bag indeed.
"In your hands, it gains the power of the will and the word. You just have to imagine something and it will appear in it."
Skeptical, Sheo tried it.
"I want some chicken!"
He buried his hands in it. Suddenly, several chickens came out of the bag, clucking and panicking until they left the room.
"It just has a couple of limitations when it comes to carbon based life forms. Otherwise, you can pull out any inanimate object."
Sheo wore the backpack. It seemed to match his...homunculi's eyes. Oh dear god. Was he starting to think like a girl now?! Zam, you evil bastard. When you get the nerve to come back, I am so going to will and the word it. Once I figure out this backpack.
"Now, if you'll excuse me..."said Sho, "There are some people here wanting to see you."
Sho opened the door. Sheo couldn't believe his eyes. Tessa, Rei and Kirika came out.
"Sheo-san..." said the soft-spoken Tessa. "Is it really you?"
"TESSA-CHAN! I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD SEE YOU AGAIN!"
"It is him!" The three girls rushed and tackled their old master/mistress. The four girls started laughing in joy.
"Wow! I never thought Sheo-san would become a girl!"
"Oh! We have to shopping, your old clothes will be too small for you!"
"Oh wow, Sheo-chan, your really well-endowed!"
"EH?! Oro..."
Sho smirked as he started to leave the door.
"Oh, one last thing Sheo."
The four girls stared at Sho and became silent.
"That backpack is merely your training tool. With enough practice, you will be able to use the will and the word to its full power. You just have to keep the backpack on. Eventually, you can will yourself you old body back. But till that day..." Sho paused.
"You are the SHEO DARRREN APPRENTICE!"
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!"
...
Sheo Darren Apprentice
Six Stars
Attack 2000
Defense 1500
For every 'Sheo Darren' and 'Sho Tsuzuku' in the graveyard, add 300 attack power to 'Sheo Darren Apprentice.' If 'Teletha Tesstarosa', 'Ayanami Rei' and 'Kirika' are in play, you may sacrifice 'Sheo Darren Apprentice' to special summon 'Sheo Darren' in play. You may get the special summoned 'Sheo Darren' from the graveyard or search your deck for it. If you search your deck for 'Sheo Darren', shuffle it afterwards.
"ZAM! YOU EVIL BASTARD! YOU WILL PAY FOR MAKING ME LIKE THIS!"
...
Sheo Darren Apprentice is now unlocked.
Sheo Darren Apprentice
Hit Points: -------
A. Musou: --------------
Attack: ----
Defense: -----
Weapon: WWBP MK 1
...
Sho note: Zam thought of that name when he realized we couldn't bring Sheo back as a boy. You have to admire his foresight."
...
P2C2 fin