Amor Fictus
Written by Sakki
Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me.
Anything you have heard of, doesn't.
"House of Pizza, how may I help you?"
"Uh…is Ran there?"
Yohji stopped flipping the pages of his latest magazine and gave a look to the telephone balanced cautiously between his ear and his shoulder.
"Ran? Yeah, why?"
"Er, can I talk to him?"
"Sure. Who is it?"
"Ken."
"Ah, right…hold on." The blonde dropped his magazine, covered the receiver of the phone, and hollered down the hall.
"OI!"
The resulting thump and string of curses that would make any sailor proud assured Yohji that Ran was indeed awake.
"What?!"
"You've got a phone call."
Silence. Then Ran came into the room and glowered at his blonde roommate.
"Who is it?"
"Your
boyfriend."
"But – Yohji!" Ran snatched
the phone from the older man's hands and turned away. He could still hear
snickering.
"Hello?"
"Ran?"
It was Ken. The first phone call Ran had gotten in years. He could hardly believe he was actually holding the plastic thing.
"Hello? Ran? Is it you?"
"Yeah, it's me."
"Good. Hey, um, I was wondering if you wanted to go down to that school dance thing later tonight."
Ran was silent.
The 'school dance thing' was basically the equivalent of a school dance, just not held in the school. It was at a club who volunteered to give the students a night every so often just to dance and be casual. Ran had never gone to one because 1) It didn't interest him and 2) because Yohji wanted him to go.
But this was Ken asking him.
"Um…I've never…been to one."
"I went to a couple with the soccer team. It's not that bad. C'mon, I don't want to be alone."
"I'd…" Ran's insides squirmed. "I'd really like to, Ken, but are you sure your guardian will let you?"
The two of them said nothing. After the incident with Ran finding out about Ken's injuries, Ran had been very careful about what he said and when they got together. It was obvious that he cared about the brunette, and not just in a brotherly way.
"…well…I already asked him…he said it…he thinks I'm going with the soccer team."
"Oh."
"It's ok, don't worry, really," Ken said, suddenly rushed. "Nobody ever comes to my place, so it's not like he expects anybody to come in with me or come get me. It's ok, Ran. So will you go?"
"I…"
Something hit the back of Ran's head. He turned around to see Yohji listening in through the kitchen phone, holding a handful of popcorn, and grinning. Ran only gave him a deadly glare.
"…Sure. Where should I meet you?"
"At the corner near the mall, where there's a lamppost. Are you ok with that?"
"Yeah. Yeah, that's fine."
Yohji pumped his fist into the air.
"It starts at 6, so we can meet there about 6:45. Ok?"
"That's good. Hey, Ken? I have to go. There's something that demands my immediate attention."
"Um, all right…see you later, then."
Ran hung up the phone and turned to Yohji, who had gone back into the kitchen for some more popcorn.
~~~
That was wholly too satisfying, Ran thought to himself as he walked down the streets of the city bathed in dying sunlight. His trenchcoat billowed out behind him – possibly the only aspect Ran liked about it.
After beating Yohji into a bloody pulp on the ground, Ran had allowed the blonde to put him in something more…'trendy', as it had been so neatly put. A black sleeveless shirt and low-rider jeans, accompanied by some combat boots and a trenchcoat were his selection. Now Ran was actually wearing those things.
"They make you look badass. But this would make you look even more badass," Yohji had claimed, handing Ran the only thing he actually had to force his younger roommate to wear.
A spiked collar.
A spiked dog collar at that.
Ran had never felt so humiliated in his entire life.
Unfortunately, it was on; Yohji had that undeniable strength one gained from sleeping with so many people. Ran cursed the man's ability to bend himself in…ways…like that.
The mall approached with surprising speed. Ran found himself standing next to the lamppost on the corner of two intersecting streets. There was nobody around. Casually, he checked his watch.
It read 6:40.
He sighed and leaned against the metal post, which was giving off a sickly orange light at the top. It didn't do much for illumination. That was why Ran didn't see the girls until they were on top of him.
"Hey, handsome," one purred, leaning in close to him. Her breath smelled like alcohol and her clothes were ruffled. "Wanna come with us?"
"We've been looking all night for someone like you," said a second, who was dressed in something Ran saw only in Yohji's magazines.
"We wondered if you'd be kind enough as to help us with something."
Four of them crowded around him, not allowing him any form of escape. The redhead's nervousness grew, but he managed to keep his stone cold façade on.
"I'm not interested."
"Oh, you're soooo lying!" One of the girls pressed her body up against him, and even Ran couldn't stop himself from blushing at the feeling he got through her shirt.
"I said I'm not interested."
"He's blushing!"
"He must be drunk."
"Let's bring him home!"
"I wanna keep him as a pet!"
"No, I wanna!"
If anyone's drunk, it's you four, he thought briefly. As the girls debated over who got to bring him home, Ran caught a glimpse of something heading in his direction from another street. Upon closer inspection, it was a brunette kid wearing a fake leather jacket and jeans.
"Ken?"
The kid looked up.
"Ken! Help!"
It was Ken, but just as Ran was hoping he'd get some help, the brunette burst out laughing and slumped against the side of the mall. Ran glowered. Oh, you're really amused by this, aren't you? Yeah, just you laugh…I'll make you pay.
The girls caught sight of Ken and pouted.
"Man, he's cute too!"
"Why did this guy say his name?"
"You think they're lovers?"
"Awww! That so figures!"
"All the cute guys are gay!"
"I am not!" snapped Ran instinctively. The girls whimpered and one pawed at his face.
"Oh, good, then you'll come with uss, won't youuuu?"
"No. Get away from me." Ran shoved her aside and stalked toward Ken, who was still laughing against the wall. He didn't stop even when Ran grabbed him by the collar and lifted him off the ground.
"Oh my God…that was too good…"
"Shut up, Ken."
"You were being offered….God!" Ken exploded into another fit of laughter. Ran growled, mostly because he knew that if Yohji had seen that, he would be doing the exact same thing.
"Would you knock it off?"
"I…" Laughter. "I want to…" Laughter again. "…but I can't…" Even more laughing. "…stop myself!"
Ran held Ken up against the wall for a few minutes before the brunette's laughter subsided.
"Why was it so funny?"
"Mostly your expressions…but the whole idea in general. Of you sleeping with somebody." A grin crossed Ken's face. "Could you put me down? My neck is starting to hurt."
Ran slowly dropped Ken and looked down at him. As Ken straightened his jacket, Ran watched every move: how Ken only used three fingers to brush the wrinkles away, how he tossed his hair out of his eyes, the way he glanced up and down the street with his arms folded across his chest.
"Ready to go?"
"Mm." The two of them started off down the street. They were quiet for awhile.
Then:
"So why are you wearing a spiked dog collar?"
"What – I'm not – It was Yohji's idea!"
Ken snickered. "And you actually let him do it?"
"He had to force it on me!"
"Right. I believe you." Ken grinned deviously. "And I suppose he forced those clothes on you, too."
"Partially. I agreed to put them on."
"You actually agreed to something?"
One glare was sent the brunette's direction. "I beat him into a pinkish, bloody mass on the kitchen floor."
"Oh, so that's what was so important…"
Again they fell silent. After a few minutes of walking, he felt a slight throbbing in his feet. Then it moved up into his legs, and when they finally turned the corner to the club, Ran realized that it wasn't just soreness he felt.
It was the bass of the music in the club.
The thing was massive in front of him; he looked at the neon glowing sign, which said 'Lightz Tailz' in massive red letters. The windows were dull and black, one even boarded up, and there was a large, muscled man standing in the doorway.
Ran bit the inside of his lip. Hard.
"Uh…Ken…I don't…"
"Have a ticket? That's ok. I got two." Ken grinned and held up two white slips of paper. "I didn't expect you to buy one."
"I'm…so glad you know me that well."
The two of them approached the seven-foot-something human barricade that separated them from the club.
"Do you kids have tickets?"
"Yeah. Two, please," Ken said.
"You got your school ID's?"
Ran's mouth went dry. His ID was in his other pair of pants. He slid one hand down into his pocket.
"Here's mine." Ken held his out. "Ran? You got yours?"
"Yeah." Ok, Yohji, you win. The blonde had hidden the ID in Ran's pocket.
"Hm…alright, you kids can go in. Be careful." The man handed back their IDs and their ticket stubs and stood aside. They walked in the door and headed down a flight of stairs, down a hall, and through one more door.
Ran almost collapsed.
A fresh wave of music slammed into his body, the bass chords trembling along his very bones. The bright lights flashed in his face and under him; the ever-changing colored floor flashed in time to the beats of the tune around it. At least two hundred people were dancing in all styles on the floor, on the tables, on the balconies high above them. Glowing red lights illuminated the stage where a DJ worked his records and CDs into overdrive. The heat was intense and only fueled by the increasing amount of bodies in the room.
Ken's latched onto Ran's arm tightly.
"God…it's…packed…"
"I didn't think you'd notice!" They had to yell to hear each other over the noise. Ran looked up into the above balcony to see what he could. He was starting to feel drops of perspiration slide down his sides already, and the smell of smoke, alcohol, and sweat was making him dizzy.
"Come on! Let's go to the bar!" Ken pulled Ran in the direction of the glowing bar. Ran tripped a few times, but managed to get to the edge of the metal contraption without hurting himself.
"What'll ya have?" said the girl standing behind the bar. She had bright blue hair – no, now it was green – no, now it was red. Ran decided that she had white hair and it was changing color with the lights. In any case, she had too much makeup on and an array of clothes that made Ran not want to look anywhere below her face.
"Just a soda," Ken told her. "Ran? You want something?"
"Uh…the same."
"What?"
"I said the same thing!"
"Okay. Two sodas."
"Gotcha, KenKen." The girl moved to get their drinks. Ran looked at Ken oddly.
"What?" The brunette shrugged. "Like I said, I'm down here with the team sometimes. They make sure people know who I am."
"But…KenKen?"
"It's a nickname."
"I figured."
The girl returned with their sodas, and Ran took his in one hand. It felt good against his palm, ice cold and dripping water. He pulled the tab and took a long drink. Ken did the same.
For awhile, they watched the groups of bodies pulse with the music. Girls and boys alike gyrated wherever they could find a separate place; couples danced wildly; people threw themselves across the flashing dance floor. More than once did a crash occur and a fight broke out. These occasions were quickly quelled by the massive bouncers who threw kids out more than once.
The heat eventually seeped deep into Ran's body, and he was forced to take off his trenchcoat. He caught Ken staring at his bared arms, which were marred by the old burn marks. But in the changing lights those scars were almost invisible.
"Ran…you…I never saw…you've got…"
The redhead sighed and waited for the usual remark that came with people seeing his scars.
"…you've got some nice muscles."
Ran stared at Ken.
"What…did you say?"
"You've got nice muscles. Do you work out at all?"
"No…"
"You're lucky, then. Most people don't have these kinds of muscles naturally." Ken leaned forward a little. "They're not too big, but you don't look wimpy…"
"I'm flattered."
"What are these?" Ken frowned and ran a finger along some of the twisted burn scars. "They don't…I didn't know tattoos went into your skin."
"They don't. Those are burns."
Ken looked up at Ran, who refused to meet his gaze.
"…Oh…I'm sorry. I didn't mean…to invade…"
"It's ok." Ran glared across the crowds.
Ken was quiet again, but quickly spoke up.
"Want to dance?"
"What?!"
"Dance. Do you want to?"
"No. I mean, I don't want to. I mean, I want to, but I can't dance. I've never danced before."
"It's not hard. You just kind of…throw yourself around. I mean, look at the other kids."
Ran glanced at the nearest pair of dancers.
"That looks painful, if you ask me…"
"You don't have to be that enthusiastic," said Ken with an annoyed tone. "And you don't have to dance. It was just an offer."
The brunette turned back to the bar. Ran didn't want to look at him, but his mind screamed at him to do it, so he eventually glanced back.
Ken was slumped against the bar, glaring at the bottles five feet away. His face glowed in the lights. A feeling twisted hotly inside Ran. He tried to force it down, but it was to no avail.
"Um…Ken…?"
"What?"
"I'll…if you teach me, I'll try."
Ken looked over at Ran, then shrugged and stood up.
"Ok. I'll teach you."
With that, Ran found himself being dragged onto the dance floor.
"Look at the people around you."
"That's not hard. I don't even have to turn my head."
"So it's full. So what? Watch what they do and then turn to your own style."
"My own style…?" Ran watched the groups of kids around him dance. Some had their arms in the air, others were spinning, some were just standing and shuffling their feet. Some of them were even dancing in pairs, but that looked really painful.
"Yeah. Go on, try it."
"I'll look like an idiot."
"Do you think anybody's going to see it?"
"You will."
"I promise I won't laugh."
"You laughed before."
"I didn't promise then."
"…you go first."
"Fine." Ken pulled off his jacket, revealing a t-shirt under it, and tied the brown thing around his waist. Then he started in on his own way of dancing to this kind of music.
Ran watched him.
Ken's style was obviously influenced from his soccer playing skills. The way he moved was mostly done with his entire body and not just his arms or his legs. Goalies had to be ready to spring into action and block the ball with everything they had. Like some sort of spirit that had sprung out of nowhere, Ken twisted his entire body and pushed off with his feet. He hit Ran and grinned up.
"C'mon! Try it!"
The music seeped into his head, the lights flashed in his eyes, Ken melded in with the other dancers. All Ran saw was a blur of colors and shadows, but in the mess of all that, he saw bright flames shooting up through the floor. Seven foot tall apparitions made of fire spun and threw their heads back, causing even more apparitions to appear. They surrounded him, caressed him, pulled him into their wild, psychotic dance.
He didn't see Ken anymore. He didn't see anyone anymore. Everything around him had melted into one big striped shape. It was like being inside a lava lamp, only with more colors and black water. The music was no longer just something he heard, it was part of his entire being. It swirled around in his head like the colors all around his body. Without him knowing it, he had started dancing and was pulling Ken into it.
Outside his head world, Ken caught sight of Ran's erratic patterns and copied them somewhat. Suddenly he was pressed body to body against Ran, his chest to Ran's, and they were moving together. He seemed as lost in the music as his redhead counterpart was. He was still coherent, though, and realized that Ran was really getting into this. What caused it had yet to be determined.
Flashing colors
and spinning flames
and writhing shadows
with a body
against his own.
Heat
on every part of him
dripping off him
glowing like the colors
like an aura
of his own.
Another one
bound within his
tied by a string
held by fate
twined forever
like kindred spirits
or just friends?
~~~
"Ran?"
Ken felt the hand on his shoulder sliding down his arm.
"Ran, are you ok?"
The other hand was latched almost painfully tight on his hip, and he winced when it clenched even harder around the bone.
"Ran…that hurts…" Ken tried to pull away, but Ran only held him closer. This was bad…
"Ran, what are you doing? Let go of me!" Ken jerked away from his partner's hold and looked right into those violet eyes.
He didn't see any more violet.
It was a twisted mass of glimmering lights and dark, dark purple. Red hair was plastered by sweat to Ran's face, and his entire body shone with sweat. For a moment, the two of them stared at each other.
Then Ran seized Ken by the wrist and dragged him off the dance floor, away from all the people, into a corner where there were only blind drunks.
"Hey – Ran – stop! What are you doing? Let go of me!"
Ran didn't seem to hear him. He pulled Ken so the brunette was in front of him, forced him against the wall, and without any warning, kissed him.
Ken was so shocked by the action that he failed to do anything in the first few moments of the kiss. Then he started fighting back. He turned his head away as well as he could.
"R-Ran…no! Stop it!"
He was silenced when the redhead forced yet another kiss onto him. Ran's grip on his wrist tightened; the other hand made its way under Ken's already loose t-shirt.
Part of Ken told him to fight back, to get away, to get out of the club. There was something wrong with Ran, something seriously wrong. It could result in something bad happening. If he didn't get away now, he wouldn't be able to get away at all, and then…what would happen…?
The other part of him, however, said so what if Ran was hallucinating? Look what was happening! A kiss from the only guy Ken had ever really liked, and just look where that other hand was going! This could result in something great!
Common sense won over. Ran was either drunk or drugged.
Unfortunately, Ran was stronger than Ken by a long shot, as the boy had determined earlier. When he tried to turn his head away, the very force of the kiss kept him in place. One of his arms was pinned next to his head, and the other was trying to push Ran off with little success. The hand under his shirt was doing things to him that Ken had felt more than once in his life.
Then that hand moved down, and suddenly Ken was forced to the floor, Ran kneeling between his legs. The kiss was broken off. Ken stared up at Ran.
No…
"Ran, stop! You bastard, wake up!"
His voice went unheard. Ran's was completely out of it, and his hands were working the belt to Ken's jeans.
"Ran, get off me! Let go!"
His voice was silent.
"Stop it! Ran! Snap out of it!"
His hands were useless.
"Can't you hear me?!"
His struggles were lost.
It seemed he wasn't entirely ignored, though; Ran suddenly dropped one hand where Ken's legs met, freezing the brunette in place. Roughly that hand moved back up to join the other one in pulling down Ken's pants.
"Oh, God…" Ken shut his eyes tight and groped for a nearby bottle. "Ran, forgive me for this…"
Ken grabbed the neck of the bottle and smashed it against the side of Ran's head.
Ran was knocked unconscious instantly.
"I'm sorry, Ran, but I had to." Ken picked the redhead up off the floor and draped him partially over one shoulder. "We're leaving now. I'll get you home. We've been here long enough."
The time was 8:00.
The cold night air was enough to wake Ran up, and as soon as the redhead managed to see again, he groaned and rubbed his head. God, what a headache…
"Ran?"
Ken's voice peeked tentatively into his consciousness. Ran glanced to his left to see Ken.
"Huhn…?"
"Are…you ok?"
"I'm…my head hurts like a bitch…but I'm ok…"
"I hope so. Can you walk?"
"I think so." Ran tried to walk, but Ken ended up supporting him to the nearby park. They sat down on a bench – or rather, Ken sat down. Ran collapsed and slumped onto Ken's shoulder. "My head…"
"Did you get a drink while I wasn't looking or something?"
"No…but the soda…tasted weird…"
"…I wonder if she gave you a beer or something instead of a soda."
"Huh?"
"It is kind of hard to see things in that light."
"Oh…"
They stared at the smoggy night sky for awhile.
"…Ran…did you…see anything…while you were dancing?"
"I saw…" Ran furrowed his eyebrows, then shut his eyes altogether and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I saw fire. And I saw…I saw…"
"…lights?"
"Yeah. Lots of lights, and…shadows."
"…did you see…anything else?"
"I saw someone that was part of me. They were dancing with me, and I…"
"…you…? What? What did you do?"
"I can't remember."
Ken gave Ran a grave look.
"…I think I know."
"Huh?"
"I was dancing with you. Then
you were looking at me all weird, and then you dragged me off the dance floor."
Ran was silent.
"You did more than that…you tried to…"
"…what did I do to you, Ken?"
"You tried to do the one thing to me you promised you'd never force onto me."
Ran shut his eyes tight. He'd hoped that wouldn't be the answer.
"…I'm sorry…"
"It's ok…you were drunk." Ken closed his eyes. "It was still scary, though."
"Mm."
They were silent again for a long time, just listening to the wind in the trees and admiring the buildings around them. Finally, Ken said he had to go home.
"I should really get going. I'll just tell him that we got thrown out for reckless behavior. He'll like that."
"Like it?"
"He likes things like that. You know, chaos, destruction, the works."
"Oh…" Ran pulled his head of Ken's shoulder and groaned. "Yohji'll never let me forget this one."
"He wanted you to go?"
"Always did." He sighed. "Well, now that I've gone, he can rub it in my face all he wants. The bastard."
"Well…it was fun for awhile. Thanks for coming, Ran."
"Uh…you're welcome."
Ken suddenly leaned in and kissed Ran on the lips. It was so quick and so sudden that Ran hardly had time to realize what had happened before Ken had vanished into the shadows of the night.
When the sensation finally reached him, though, he brought his fingers up and touched his lips.
"…Ken?"