Date begun: 15th October, 2004
Date finished: 9th November, 2004
Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to the writer, they remain property of Channel Seven and Southern Star
Song Credits: Kim O'Leary and John Farnham
Dedication: For all the Susie and Jonesy fans out there, especially Steff, and for Em and Elle. Also for the one and only Simone McAullay who was just the best when I met her at Telethon 2004. Thanks for making my night! This is for you!
© Riss 2004
Every Step
Susie couldn't work it out. Why didn't things ever go her way? She had thought that moving to Mt Thomas would be a fresh start, after all the drama and struggles she and brad had gone through since Brad's accident on the job. And for a while it was good. The quiet little country town, its little cop shop and a new flat for the two of them.
Everything fell apart though soon enough, and it all seemed to crumble so quickly. Brad had never been quite the same after the accident anyway, and moving to Mt Thomas hadn't done as much for Brad as it had for Susie. It was simple – she fitted in and he didn't. It was so obvious that Susie had never been able to see it.
That was until Susie finally begun to realize it was all unraveling, and at an alarming rate. Ben shot Brad, and she lost her husband forever. She lost the man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with, the man she had married.
She knew it wasn't Ben's fault, like she so often reminded herself. Brad had changed. He wasn't the same person, and Ben had had no choice. And Brad had wanted to die anyway, Susie knew that now. He was never meant to be as inactive as being a paraplegic made him. And then Lisa. They had never really seen eye to eye. It didn't help that Lisa was so close to her brother, and didn't like the way Susie took a lot of his attention away from her when he and Susie married.
At the time, Susie couldn't believe her ears when Lisa spat out the nonsense about a secret affair between Susie and Ben. And so there was no one more surprised than Susie, when the very next year, not even twelve months after Brad's death, Susie found herself in a relationship with none other than Sergeant Ben Stewart. It had been so unexpected. Grief did that to you. Grief had taken over Ben's conscious, and it soon did Susie's. Ben had a way of making people fall for his 'heart on sleeve' persona. And Susie missed Jo in much the same way Ben did. They had a little connection through that fact, and although it was faint, Ben grabbed a hold of the connection with a vengeance.
That was why they became a secret couple not many weeks after the bombing. And then before she felt comfortable with it, Ben made their relationship public knowledge and then everyone knew about them. It was the last thing Susie had ever wanted.
Nobody, not even Ben, had noticed that Susie hadn't returned quite to her old self after the bombing. Susie didn't know about anyone else, but she was still struggling to cope with what had happened. She hid it from everyone, too embarrassed to ask for a shoulder to lean on. But when she was alone she had nothing else to think about but what she had lost. She cried and cried, because she missed Jo so much. They had been so close, really good friends, the only girls of the station, and then, out of the clear day, she was gone. And Susie missed her friend more than anything. That was the thing with death, she thought. You never really had a chance to say a proper goodbye, and sometimes that was what hurt the most.
She sat alone in her room in the Imperial many nights and thought about all the other members of the station. Did they feel like this too? Did they miss Jo the way she did? And furthermore, did they long for the old days of their old station when Mt Thomas was just a quiet, peaceful country town that was a pleasant place to be?
And Ben, she always inwardly groaned whenever his face came into her head, he wasn't helping. He was so suffocating! But Susie didn't have the heart, much less the strength, to break it off with him.
Susie felt so drained. Was it too much to ask for a break? Surely she deserved one. She didn't feel like she had the strength to deal with Ben, to deal with Jonesy and Donna, to deal with her emotions over losing Jo. It was all feeling like too much.
Susie felt like this for weeks, but then, just when she felt things were never going to get better, a surge of renewed energy at last bought her out of her dark haze and back to the surface. She had little idea of where the new energy came from, but was happy it was at last making her feel better, and back in control. She gained the strength to confront Ben, and told him their fling was finished. She had expected it would hit him hard and she wasn't wrong. It looked like he went into the dark haze quickly, the dark haze Susie knew so well.
Susie didn't show it, but she worried about Ben. And she worried about herself. Was it possible for a person to take on too much? Worry about too much? Just how much could one person take? She had only just overcome her grief about losing Jo, and then she broke off her 'obligation' to Ben and he spiralled down into a deep hole of depression. And Susie knew it was a dangerous thing to be overcome by. So she did what she couldn't help but do. She worried. And it felt like a lead weight on her shoulders.
And she was getting over Jo's death slowly, day by day, but it was still there. A little thing that always just nagged at her and impossible to ignore. She was stronger these days, she knew that. She could feel it in her bones. But Ben was still there, still reminding her of all the problems in her life, like a sore tooth you keep touching with your tongue to see if it feels better. Of course, it never does.
She didn't want all this to affect her job. She loved being a copper, she had always loved it, and she didn't want her emotional state to affect the way she worked. She wished it could all just go away, go back in time to a year ago when work was something to look forward to everyday and Jo and Brad were still alive.
Some of her colleagues did notice her change in mood occasionally though. PJ, the ever sensitive soul, was one of the first to notice. "You ok Suse?" he asked one day in the mess room, his hand on her shoulder, a concerned look on his face.
It bought a small smile to her lips. "I should be asking you that," she looked at him intently.
He just smiled in response, waiting for a proper answer from her. His hand remained on her shoulder as he willed her to tell him the truth.
She relented at last. "I'm ok," she whispered as she turned her attention back to her cup of coffee.
"You'll get over it," PJ said, wandering away. It was such a simply statement, one that hadn't intended to offend or anger Susie, but that was how she took it.
Susie whipped around. "That's a bit premature isn't it?" she snapped.
PJ stopped in his tracks by the door. He turned around slowly. "I didn't mean it like that Suse," he said quietly, trying not to let her words shake him.
Susie exhaled. "I know," she sighed. "Sorry PJ," she hesitated for a moment, then walked across the room and hugged him. Susie buried her face in the leather of PJ's jacket, and he held her tight. Tighter even than when Brad had died, she noticed, surprised. In his arms she felt an urgency for love.
He missed Jo more than he was letting on.
Susie's days were only stopped from getting brighter by Ben's becoming darker. What she had feared might happen to her in recent weeks had happened to Ben. His emotions began to affect his job, and Jonesy nearly lost his life as a result. Ben was cracking under the pressure.
Susie felt powerless as to what to do though. Was Ben's spiral down her fault? Was this happening because she had broken it off with him? Probably, she mused.
In bed at night she racked her brain trying to figure out how she could right the situation. More often than not she fell asleep in the darkness, exhausted, and not having resolved a thing.
The atmosphere at work was certainly of no aid to Susie. Feelings were tense between Susie and Jonesy, thanks to his brief relationship with the now notorious Donna Maitland. Susie had been pinning perhaps too many of her hopes on her and Jonesy getting back to being the good mates, perhaps even more, that they once were, now that Donna was out of the equation. But she had been wrong.
Tension was also evident between Ben and Jonesy. Ben, still obviously reeling and deeply hurt by the sudden ending of his and Susie's relationship, was doing all he could to prevent any interaction between Susie and Jonesy, hoping that nothing would develop between them, so that his feelings would not be crushed even further.
This at times infuriated Susie, and was even obvious to all of her colleagues, but Susie knew that if she were to go out on a job with Evan, the right words would not come out of her mouth, if any would come out at all. Her mouth felt dry at just the thought.
But Ben didn't always get his way. Mark was a sergeant too, and before she knew it, and before Ben had a chance to protest, and think up a reason for her to stay in the station, behind her desk, or in the interview room, Mark had sent her out on patrol with Jonesy.
They sat in the car, the silence deafening between them. Susie glanced out of the corner of her eye at Jonesy as he drove. His fingers kneaded the steering wheel, his eyes staring directly ahead. Susie sighed inwardly. They had to work together, so they had to communicate, and there in the patrol car they were getting nowhere. Each one was waiting for the other to speak.
Finally, as they approached an old, dusty road, with paddocks on either side, Susie knew she had to say something. What she was going to say still hadn't come to her, but she decided to just see what came out of her mouth when the time came.
The road was like any you would find in a farming district. Sunburnt Australian land as far as the eye could see, and further. But neither Susie nor Jonesy took in the landscape. They each searched their conscious for the right words to say. Words that would break the ice. And then it came to them both at once.
"Look, we have to work together..." Susie began, at the same time Jonesy spoke.
"Look Suse, about the Donna thing..."
Evan blushed, embarrassed, and his fingers continued to knead the steering wheel as the nerves raced through his body.
"You go first," Susie managed a smile. Evan took a deep breath, trying in vain to control his nervousness.
"OK..." he began, glancing briefly at her. "About Donna, it's over now, I know you know that, but I want you to know that I just want to forget about her and focus on us being mates again," he exhaled slowly, looking at her again. She wasn't looking at him though; she was looking at the speedo. He was barely doing forty k's.
"Do you want to stop Jonesy?" she gave a little laugh. "We're not really getting anywhere with the speed you're going anyway."
Again, Evan felt his cheeks grow hot. He pulled the patrol car over to the side of the road and unbuckled his seatbelt gratefully, as if it had been restraining him a bit too much.
Susie did the same and shuffled around in her seat until her right shoulder was leaning against the seats back and her head on the headrest. She looked cautiously at Jonesy. "Can we go back to the way we were? Can we really?" Susie questioned him.
"Well I mean we were great mates Suse, before Donna and Theo entered the picture," he paused. "Don't you want to be mates?" his eyes went downcast.
"Of course I do Jonesy, but what about what else we had?" Susie sat up, leaning towards him in earnest.
"Oh you mean...?" Evan nodded, but had to go on. "Look Suse, a lot of women have screwed me around in the past."
It was not what Susie wanted to hear. "What are you saying? That just because I have feelings for you, I've screwed your whole life around?" she asked angrily.
Jonesy shook his head violently. "No no no, Suse, you've got the wrong idea...wait," he suddenly stopped. "You've got feelings for me?"
"You seem surprised," Susie replied coolly. Jonesy still looked as puzzled as ever. "God you're so dense Jonesy! Do you think we wouldn't have almost kissed on countless occasions, wouldn't have gone out together and wouldn't have worked so well as a team if I hadn't had feelings for you? And for that matter, if you hadn't have had feelings for me? Was all that nothing? Did it not mean anything to you? Cos it sure as hell meant the world to me!" she exclaimed, exhausted after such a long, in depth spiel. Yet she still held a steady, unbreakable gaze with his eyes.
Jonesy tilted his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes. "I thought all that meant nothing to you," he said quietly.
"Meant nothing to me? Why in the world would it mean nothing?" Susie asked, shocked.
"Because of Ben," Evan replied.
"Ben?"
"Yeah, you dived in head first to that, I thought all we had shared was long gone and forgotten."
"It was never forgotten," Susie whispered.
"So what was Ben then?" Evan asked, curious as ever.
"Ben was nothing...did you think it was more?"
"Well I didn't know, you and Ben were suddenly like a bloody married couple Suse, presents, dinner, the lot. I didn't know what to think. This is what I meant about women screwing me around. I never know what's going on – what's the real deal and what's not," Evan did look genuinely puzzled Susie easily observed.
"So you thought that what we once had was nothing?" Susie asked, scared, knowing it was partly her own fault.
"Well...yeah," Evan replied. "I know I didn't help the situation with Donna. You probably thought that I thought what we had was nothing too," Susie nodded – she had been thinking that, and it hurt her more than she would say. "So I'm sorry," Evan took her hand and held it.
Susie looked down at her hand in his. Her eyes stung with tears over the heat of the conversation, and the realisation that yet again, things had not gone according to plan, much like her whole life in Mt Thomas hadn't seemed to go according to plan either.
"But are we going to be able to go back to the way we were? Will it work again? Is there still a spark?" Susie was sceptical.
Evan shrugged helplessly. "I don't think either of us can really say that yet," he admitted sadly. Susie knew he was right, she just wished he wasn't.
That night Susie lay in bed, no covers on her, as the night was a typical summer one where the sheets always just got kicked off. Her hands rubbed at her eyes and then she linked them behind her head. She thought hard about the deep and meaningful she had shared with Evan earlier that day. Had it helped at all? Were they now better off? One step further along? Or had they taken one step back? How Susie wished she knew. The days events had exhausted her though, and she was soon asleep, her thoughts and worries drifting from her head and out the window to the warm summer breeze, enabling her to have some proper rest at last.
The next day started off like any other, but she had little idea that it would carry with it a big change. Any efforts to make it a 'normal' day would most certainly prove fruitless. It didn't actually really hit Susie until she, Evan and PJ came across the car Ben had been driving. Ben wasn't in there and its emptiness scared Susie. Where was he? Her mind raced as she peered into the car, seeing Ben's police diary on the dashboard, and sat down in the drivers seat to open it up.
"Tell my kids I love them," she whispered as she read Ben's familiar scrawly handwriting. Susie's heart fell – this was what she thought it was. How could Ben feel this low?
But then there he was, walking towards the patrol car, a smile on his face. He seemed to come out of nowhere. Susie smiled briefly when she saw him. She hadn't seen him smile for such a long time. It was the old Ben back at last.
She knew his resignation was the right way to go. He wasn't happy here, he didn't belong in the job anymore, it was plain to see, and they all knew how close he was to his kids and how much he missed them. Susie could easily imagine how much it must hurt to be away from those you love. But the thought of not having Ben in the station was so strange. He wasn't going to be her sergeant anymore. Yes, there were times when she had wished Ben wasn't apart of her life, usually during those long lonely nights when she cried into her pillow, but she knew deep down somewhere that she didn't really mean it. Ben was a great friend, one of her best. He was such a kind and caring human being. The deaths of his colleagues and friends over the years had shown the world just what a sensitive, friendly, giving person he was by the way he reacted to their passing.
So Ben was gone. She couldn't blame him. Now that he'd made the decision to be near his kids, why not go as soon as possible? Susie knew he would be happy in Perth with Maddy, Emma and Josh.
And so the station changed a little. Evan and Susie were working together each day, but things were still unspoken between them. The more she thought about what she and Evan had discussed, the more unsure of everything she became. Even though Evan had said he cared about her, wanted to be mates again, maybe even something more, she wasn't sure Evan knew her enough. Problem was, he probably thought he did. This seriously nagged at Susie.
And it came to a head a few nights after Ben left Mt Thomas. Susie sat at a table by the dart board in the public bar with Amy. They chatted easily, something they had only just discovered the past night or two ever drinks after work. Amy was only a few years older than Susie, and they got along well. They were talking about a new café in St Davids when Evan came downstairs and ordered a drink at the bar.
"Jonesy!" Amy called out, seeing him lean against the bar amongst the throng of patrons all demanding Chris's attention. She waved at him, beckoning him over. "Join us," she pulled out one of the spare wooden chairs for him. He smiled, grabbed his freshly poured beer and headed towards Amy and Susie.
He sat across from Susie, by the window, and to her own surprise, she shuffled in her seat uncomfortably. She sipped her drink and looked at anything but his face.
Much to Amy's disappointment, all that was spoken between the three of them was small talk – the weather, work, Chris's steak sauce. It was brain numbingly boring. Amy had a sneaking suspicion Jonesy and Susie couldn't talk properly with her sitting there with them, and so after just a few minutes, she politely excused herself and made her way out of the bar and home to her flat.
Susie watched her leave, slightly annoyed. How could Amy just leave her here with Jonesy? It was hard enough to maintain normal conversation when Amy was there, never mind when she had left and Susie and Jonesy had no-one to talk to but each other. It reminded her all too much of their conversation in the patrol car. They had not spoken about that day since the day it happened and Susie was almost afraid of broaching the subject again.
"How's that new bush walking trail hey?" Jonesy tried to make normal conversation with Susie. A new walking trail in the national park had recently been opened to the public, but was long, winding and difficult and was proving a headache for the Mt Thomas police as they seemed to be inundated with missing persons calls daily. The national park did not want to let the bush walkers know of the people that went missing for hours on end sometimes, until the police found them that is, sunburnt and tired, as they felt it would put walkers off appreciating the native flora and fauna. The police were not impressed, to say the least, but there wasn't much they could do. Still, it didn't help that it was not the first time the Mt Thomas Police and the park rangers had come to loggerheads.
"Yeah," Susie replied. "Never been one for bush walking much myself," she laughed lightly, but was embarrassed to hear it sounded artificial and rehearsed. Her cheeks grew pink.
"Oh?" Evan was surprised. "I always thought you were a bit of an outdoorsy sort of girl."
"Well you were wrong," Susie answered. "You don't know everything about me Evan," Susie sipped her drink again and looked away, not catching the confused look on his face. He was shocked. She never called him Evan. Never.
"I know I don't Suse," Evan whispered in reply. "But I thought I knew you pretty well, we're mates aren't we?"
"Well sometimes I just don't know," Susie got up angrily and walked out of the bar, and padded quickly up the stairs to her room. Entering, she let out a breath she felt like she had been holding for an eternity. She quickly brushed at a few tears that had begun to form in her eyes, sat down on her bed, rested her elbows on her knees and held her head in her hands. Why did she and Evan always fight? It wasn't the way she wanted it to be.
A knock came at the door. "Suse?" Evan's voice sounded timid. He pushed the door open slowly to see Susie with her head still in her hands. She looked up at him with a forlorn look on her pretty face.
"You don't know me Evan, not enough," Susie said, sweeping her blonde hair out of her eyes. Evan moved a little closer.
"Don't I?" he whispered. "I think I do." He was persistent, she'd give him that.
Susie stood up, anger beginning to run though her veins. "You don't know me! Don't assume!' she yelled. "And if you think you do, then just remember, a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing."
Evan didn't stick around for much longer to hear anymore of what Susie had to say. He'd heard more than enough, and didn't want her harsh words to make him visibly angry. He slammed her door as he left her room and stomped down the hall to his own room, positively fuming. How dare she speak to him like that? He did know the inner workings of Susie Raynor, maybe not entirely, but he knew a fair bit. Probably more than she thought. They had worked together for a year now, and a lot could happen in a year. And a lot had. Evan had uncovered a lot about Susie, simply through observing her. Working with her, training with her, and talking.
What was the problem? He didn't understand and it was so frustrating. He cast his mind back to the corrupt St Davids cops siege and its thankful ending when his colleagues had burst in the door, pistols drawn and found the culprit at last. He remembered it so vividly because it was the first time in a long time he had felt connected to Susie again. And despite the situation and his injuries at the time, it made him feel so good. When the action was over it was his arms she had chosen to fall into. And it had made him so happy.
The following morning Susie and Jonesy headed to work with very different attitudes. Jonesy was eager to get to work and get his mind on the job rather than on Susie. Susie, on the other hand, was dreading her shift, and laid in bed that morning, the room silent around her, trying to think of the best excuse to give to Mark for not coming into work. Everything she came up with though was weaker than weak, and she knew he would never believe her. Knowing she had no other choice, she poured herself out of bed, the sheets unsticking from her skin and walked slowly to the window. Upon reaching it she leant her elbows on the sill and stuck her head out into the sunshine. The warmth felt like soft, delicate kisses on her skin and she bowed her head, closing her eyes, and without realising it, a few lonely tears swam down her cheeks and fell off her face into nothing.
An overwhelming sense of sadness, stronger than ever before, swept over her as she leaned out the window. She felt like she had nobody and she didn't know how to change that heart breaking realisation. Everybody needed somebody. Everybody. Even her, even though she knew that sometimes she didn't merit a soul mate. Someone to hold her tight always.
How was she going to face Evan at work? She'd been so awful to him the previous night and knew he'd be hurt. But she didn't know what to say to make it up to him. She wished she could find the right words. Despite all this, she walked in the back door of the station at 8am that morning. As she reached for the door handle, she felt a presence behind her, and she knew it was Evan.
But he brushed past her quickly, not saying a word and Susie was left alone in the doorway. He really was hurt, goddammit, Susie yelled silently to herself.All day Evan worked in a way he had never before. He spoke to his colleagues in a staccato manner – quickly, rarely, bluntly and to the point. It didn't take the rest of the members long to get a bit agro about it, and so, sensing everyone elses moods, mark tried desperately to find something for Evan to do outside of the station, away from everybody else. And so when a call from the rangers at the national park came in about yet another missing bushwalker, mark sent Evan to investigate alone. This was not usual policy. Members almost always went with a 'buddy' on jobs. It was the safest practise. But Mark could tell Evan needed to be out in the fresh air, and was clearly in desperate need of some solitude to sort out whatever it was that was bothering him. It was a move mark would later regret.
Evan hopped gratefully into the four wheel drive and headed towards the national park to face another episode of the 'inexperienced bushwalkers'. It was becoming a daily occurrence, and usually required an hour or two of their time, tops. Although he wanted to be away from Susie, he headed to the park with a heavy heart. This bushwalking thing was starting to get on his and everyones nerves.
He drove in the entrance, actually beginning to appreciate Mark's thoughtfulness. He parked, hopped out, and took a deep breath of the scented air. He smiled as the smell of wattle, gum trees and bottlebrush met with his senses. Not too much later though, he found himself loaded down with water, food, band-aids and spare boots and trampling through the bush's trails. It was pleasantly quiet, and Evan wondered why the rangers couldn't find their bushwalkers themselves, rather than using up police manpower. He shook his head as he walked along, keeping an eye out for the young woman missing.
After half an hour his legs were beginning to hurt and he feared he had gone off the track somewhat. There had been no sign of the young bushwalker either, which had him worried. He radioed in and told mark he would continue looking for another half an hour, and if he hadn't come across her by then, reinforcements would have to be called in, and the SES would have to join the search.
Jonesy wondered along at a steady pace. He tried to ignore the pain in his legs, cursing himself for giving up footy and not renewing that gym membership. He was losing his touch.
Time crept along slowly as he walked and he began to notice the trial getting bumpier, steeper and more difficult. No wonder people were piking it on this trail, he thought. It was tough, and he wondered why the national park had opened it in the first place.
Then suddenly his foot kicked something on the trail. He looked down and saw that it was a red plastic drink bottle, now empty of its contents and covered partly in dust and dirt, not to mention a few stray beetles and bugs. He bent down to pick it up and looked it over. The name Renae Kavanagh was written on the side in a thick black marker. This was the girls! Evan's heart leapt and his legs seemed to give a cheer. The park rangers had said her name was Renae.
He walked along at a faster pace and soon came across a faded Billabong visor resting on top of a pile of leaves, like it had been frisbeed there. Evan knew the girl must be close now.
He came to a steep embankment, padded out with rocks and towering gums. His hands on his hips, he stood on the edge and looked down the slope, no longer needing to shield his eyes as the midday sun was not so bright anymore. His eyes fell upon what he had been expecting to see. A crumpled lump at the bottom of the slope, backpack only metres away.
Evan made his way carefully down the slope, almost losing his own footing. The slope was steep and as much as he wanted to race down to the injured girl, he had no choice but to tread slowly and carefully.
At last he reached the bottom of the embankment and crouched beside the bushwalker. To his surprise she was conscious, her eyes open, but just laying there silently like she had lost the strength to move any body part. He put his hand to her sweaty, clammy face.
"Hey," he said, leaning in towards her, concerned. "Are you ok? Where does it hurt?"
The girl lifted her head slightly, and a tear rolled down her face as she scrunched up her face in pain. "My ankle, it cains," she whimpered.
"All right, well we'll get you out of here Renae," Evan scooped her up into his arms with ease.
The girl looked confused. "How do you know my name?" she asked, wrapping her arms around his neck.
"Found your drink bottle," he smiled.
"Arrgghhhh how embarrassing," the girl cringed, her face turning pink and her mind off her ankle for a minute or two. "Mum still insists on labelling every bloody thing I own. God I'm 17!"
Evan just smiled, his eyes scanning the landscape. They were in thick, dense bush, and Evan couldn't see an easy way back up the embankment.
"Hey Renae, I'm just going to set you down again ok?" Jonesy said. Renae nodded and settled back on the leafy ground cover. Evan reached to his belt and pulled off his portable and pressed the button on the side, speaking into the mouthpiece.
"Mt Thomas 509 to Mt Thomas station," Evan tried to keep the urgency out of his voice so as not to frighten Renae.
The response was nothing but static, but even so, Evan tried again. Again, static was the only response. "Must be too far from a signal," he murmured to himself.
"You don't happen to have a mobile do ya Renae?" Evan asked hopefully.
"Yeah," Renae replied, reaching for the zipper pocket by the knee of her pants. "But I don't know if it'll work after my fall," she retrieved the phone and handed it to Evan.
He dialled the station, as it was the only number he could remember. He put the phone to his ear and crossed his fingers. For a moment there was no sound and he thought the mobile was damaged as Renae had said or was too far out of range, just like his portable had been.
But then it rang, and his hopes soared. After just two rings the phone was picked up by PJ. His voice was crackly.
"Mt Thomas...olice...Hasha...speakin..."
"PJ!" Evan spoke loudly. "Can you hear me?"
"Yeah mate," Evan moved towards a clearing where he could hear PJ better. "What's up?"
"I found that bushwalker, she's got a broken ankle I think, and some cuts and bruises," Evan replied, eyeing Renae as he spoke.
"She conscious?"
"Yep," Evan answered. "But my portable doesn't work, so I need you to get an ambulance here, maybe even a chopper to get her out."
"Well
where are you? On the new track?"
"Yeah a bit off it I
think. I had to go down a pretty steep embankment to reach her."
"Well can we use the SES instead of the chopper?" PJ asked.
"Hmmm yeah probably. I don't think it'd be too difficult, as long as they can get down to us," Evan looked up the slope again, sceptical.
"OK, we'll get em there asap, just hang tight," PJ reassured Evan.
"Thanks PJ," Evan answered, breathing a sigh of relief. "But it's going to be dark soon, yet the temperature's still up there, so make sure they're not too long if you can mate," Evan hung up after saying goodbye, almost reluctantly.
Evan reassured Renae the SES would be there soon to take her to the hospital. Renae was calm, for which Evan was grateful.
Evan had thought the SES would be an hour, at most, and so settled against a wide tree trunk next to Renae and chatted with her. They spoke easily, like they had been friends all their lives. Renae was friendly, funny and interested in Evan's career in the force and his somewhat police dynasty family history.
An hour ticked by, and it was reaching 4pm. The heat still radiated down on them, but Jonesy surrendered his food and water to the tired bushwalker to keep her comfortable.
"You got a girlfriend? Wife?" Renae figured someone as good looking as him would be well and truly taken. Damn her parents for having her in 1985!
"Well..." Evan replied hesitantly. Did he really want to discuss his relationship problems with a seventeen year old girl? "Yes and no."
"How can it be yes and no?" Renae laughed, trying hard not to move her foot, which was resting on top of Jonesy's pack.
"It's complicated," Evan sighed, not wanting to go any further into it.
But Renae was more persistent. She leant back and closed her eyes. "I can't wait to be with that special person. Mr Right you know?"
"Yeah," Evan replied, looking off into the distance.
"So this girl you are with but you're not with at the same time, how does she feel?" Renae probed.
"I don't really know," Evan replied. "Like I said, it's complicated," Evan was hoping Renae would take the hint.
Luckily Renae was smart, and picked up on his hint immediately. "Just don't let her go hey? You'll never know how devastated she'll be. Look I know chicks, I'm a chick myself," she smiled knowingly at him, raising her eyebrow at him humourlessly. "And if you've had something with her, even just a little something, it'll shatter her if you throw that away. She's holding onto that little something with you. It's all the hope she's got," Renae turned back to lean against the tree trunk and closed her eyes once more.
Evan leaned back too, Renae's words running through his head over and over. Was she right? He supposed she was. After all, she knew chicks, he smiled. Maybe Susie was right, maybe he didn't know her as well as he thought.
The time ticked away, and Evan constantly eyed his watch. By 5:30pm he was starting to get worried and Renae was tiring and had become quiet as her ankle throbbed. She was trying not to be a pain, and didn't mention it to Evan, but he could tell.
Where was the SES? He couldn't let himself think that he and Renae had gone far off the track. Thankfully the heat had started to falter, but it meant only that mosquitoes replaced the buzzing flies of the bush. Evan couldn't decide which he hated more.
"Jonesy?" Renae spoke up, breaking the silence. "My ankles really hurting and..." she hesitated. "There's no more water left," she winced.
Evan sighed. "Don't worry 'Nae," he reassured her. "They'll be here soon."
"I thought you said they'd only take an hour," Renae's composure was beginning to waver as she worried about her injury and the almost upon them nightfall.
Evan suddenly remembered a crucial factor. He hadn't given PJ Renae's mobile number. He had no way to contact Evan, and the skies were growing darker by the second, the night animals coming out of their hiding places. "I'm going to try and call the station again," Evan stated, grabbing the phone beside him. He stood up and walked into the clearing, dialling the stations number as he walked, preying it would work.
This time Tom answered. "Jones!" Tom's voice had relief as well as surprise in it. "We can't find you anywhere! The SES have been searching since just after three. Where on earth are you?"
"Boss, we haven't moved all arvo," Evan's voice full of worry and apprehension. "Where have they been looking?"
"All over Jones!" Tom's tone leapt up. "Are you sure you haven't gone further off the track than you thought?"
"It's possible I suppose, but we can't be that far off it," Evan replied urgently. "Hang on," Evan placed his hand over the mouth piece and turned to Renae. Do you think we're far off the original track?" he asked her.
Renae tilted her head, thinking hard. "I'd walked almost to the extreme point of the track when I fell I think. And I remember the rangers saying that that was about a k from Langara creek," Renae seemed more certain the more she said, which calmed Evan.
He turned back to the clearing. "Renae reckons we're about a k or so from Langara creek."
"I'll tell the SES. They must be close," Tom answered. "Shouldn't be too much longer."
"All right, thanks Boss," they said their goodbyes.
Evan walked back over and sat next to Renae once more. He patted her good leg and began digging a hole into the ground with a twig he had laid his hand on when rejoining Renae. "They're almost he–"Evan stopped and gasped in pain as a bolt of electricity shot up his right arm. He pulled it up, a reflex all humans have. A person always pulls away from whatever has hurt them.
Evan screamed out in agony. An eastern brown slithered away into the shrubbery just as quickly as and discreetly as it had appeared.
"Jonesy!" Renae gasped, taken by surprise at his sudden yell. "What's wrong?"
"I've been bitten!" Evan screamed, still reeling from the pain.
"Bitten by what?" panic came through in Renae's voice.
"A snake," beads of sweat were beginning to form on Evan's forehead as he gripped his right wrist with his left hand and stared at it wide–eyed in shock.
"Shit," Renae whispered hoarsely. "What do we do?!"
"I need something to put pressure on it, quick look in my pack will ya?" Renae lifted her foot painstakingly off the backpack it had been resting on and undid the buckle, reaching in. Her hands fell upon a small cold metal box. Pulling it out she was relieved to see that it was a first aid kit. Inside she found tweezers, an eye patch, mosquito and insect ointment, slings, safety pins, band aids, scissors and everything imaginable, except for a bandage.
Evan watched as she went frantically through the kits contents. "I can't believe this! How can a first aid kit, packed by bloody park rangers of all people, not have a pressure bandage in it?!" he yelled.
"I dunno, I dunno," Renae replied, panicked as can be. "Wait...there is one here, it's ok!" she pulled it out from the depths of the box.
"Well get it out!" Evan tried not to sound rude towards Renae, as she was probably as panicked as he was.
She crawled over to him, dragging her now immobile ankle through the dirt, and knelt awkwardly by his side, and began wrapping the bandage tightly around the snake bite. Renae and Evan couldn't possibly ignore the look of the bite and how swollen it had become so quickly. It was tinged red and looked nasty. Evan tried to remain confident that the pressure bandage would do its job though.
As Renae finished wrapping the wound Evan reached for the mobile. "Renae, you need to call the station again, tell them I've been bitten by a...a...an eastern...brown...I think," Evan rasped out his words breathlessly. He managed to tell Renae the number and she limped awkwardly, with tears squeezing out of her eyes from the pain of her own injury towards the clearing to dial, her ankle throbbing painfully all the while.
"Mt Thomas police," Mark picked up the phone this time.
"Hi hi, ahhh my name's Renae, I'm with Jonesy," Renae said quickly.
"Renae," Mark sounded relieved. "I'm Mark, where's Constable Jones?"
"He's been bitten by a snake, an eastern brown he reckons...where are you guys?" Renae almost shrieked down the phone.
"Renae Renae calm down," Mark soothed. "Listen to me, the SES are almost there, hold tight."
"That's what they said to Jonesy two hours ago!" Renae cried into the phone.
"I know, I know, but I promise you they're almost there. Now have you done anything for the bite?" Mark's responsible sergeant attitude kicked back in after calming Renae down.
"I put a pressure bandage on it, what else can I do?"
"Not much I don't think," Mark replied dejectedly. "The SES will be there soon and they'll treat him further if they have to, they might even have an anti venom on them."
"OK, but tell them to move their butts and find us!" Renae hung up.
Renae was scared. Even though the pain was still persistent in her ankle, she had almost forgotten about it. That was because Jonesy was beginning to space out. He was losing it. It had been only about 5 minutes since she had hung up with Mark and ever since then Evan had been complaining that he was dizzy and that his stomach hurt. Renae didn't know what to do and she put her head in her hands, leaning against the tree trunk. Why was this happening? It was supposed to be the strong policeman looking after the lost bushwalker, not the other way around. And Evan did look strong. In normal circumstances, she thought, he was probably a powerhouse of fighting energy. But not here in the bush, slumped next to her. He was anything but. She laid him down, in a bid to end the dizziness he was feeling, and whispered soothingly to him.
And then a torch beam hit the ground a few metres away, brightly lighting up a small kangaroo paw. "Can anyone hear me?" came an echoing voice. Renae straightened up from looking down at Jonesy, excited to hear the rescuers at last.
"We're down here!" Renae yelled, but her voice was hoarse from the lack of water and the hot conditions.
Renae cast her mind back remembering a book she had read once that said if you ran out of water in a situation such as this, you should suck on a pebble to create saliva. She screwed up her face, and ran her hands over the ground, searching for a small rock to put in her mouth, and hoping feverishly that she wouldn't put a rolled up slater or snail shell in her mouth by mistake.
Then her fingers fumbled in the darkness on a pebble of perfect size. She bought it up to her mouth, not believing she was about to do something so disgusting, and dropped it in, rolling it around with her tongue. Her face became distorted as she tasted the bitterness of dirt and who knows what else that had come in contact with that rock. Trying to ignore the taste, she rolled it around for a few more seconds, and then spat it out gratefully. Her saliva now at least partly renewed, she took a deep breath and got ready to scream to the rescuers.
"We're down here! Down the embankment!" she yelled loudly. "Down here! Down here! Come and get us! He's got a snake bite!" she knew that would make them come even faster, and the faster they came the better.
She heard a rustling of leaves and then footsteps and twigs snapping as the searchers ran not so delicately down the slope. They tumbled to the ground, five of them in total, and some even fell over and somersaulted themselves as they reached the bottom where Evan and Renae lay, due to the steepness of the slope. But they recovered quickly, being the seasoned professionals they were, and huddled around Renae and Evan. Quick as a flash, and without wasting too much time talking, they had fed water to Renae and put both her and Evan onto stretchers and half ran half walked them into a clearing several hundred metres away, where a Royal Flying Doctor Service chopper had just landed.
As they loaded Evan and Renae on, and climbed aboard themselves, one SES member squeezed Evan's good hand and was close enough to hear him whisper one word. "Susie."
Susie was waiting anxiously by the emergency entrance of the hospital. The Boss had informed her that Evan and the bushwalker were being airlifted and then transferred by ambulance to the hospital.
Susie wandered back and forth by the door, her hand always on her portable that was connected to her belt, on the verge of contacting the Boss again to pester him for details. But she held herself back, knowing he would just get annoyed at her. She couldn't blame him really – she'd called three times in the last ten minutes alone.
Then at last there was a squeal of tyres as the ambulance pulled up into the emergency bay. The doors flew open as the officers lifted Evan out. Even from where she stood, at least ten metres away, Susie could see the mess that Evan's snake bitten hand had become. She ran to his side as they wheeled him towards the emergency entrance doors.
"Jonesy!" she said breathlessly, her eyes connecting with a still Jonesy lying on the trolley, his eyelids only fluttering weakly.
"He's going to be fine," a nurse beside her said. And with that he was wheeled away to let the miracles of anti venom take affect.
An SES member came to find Susie later that night in the waiting room, where Susie was trying unsuccessfully to get comfortable in the hard plastic chairs. He sat beside her and smiled. "My name's Euan," he said politely, sticking out his hand to her. "You wouldn't happen to be the 'Susie' Constable Jones mentioned would you?" he smiled again, a warm, friendly, reassuring smile.
"He said Susie?" she looked at him intently, her eyes full of hope.
"As we were loading him into the chopper, yeah," he answered. "My colleague Steff was holding his hand and he just squeaked out that one word. Your name."
A tear came to Susie's eye. "Really?" she breathed, unaware a whole group of SES volunteers had just walked in the waiting room, looking for Euan.
Euan stood up, patting Susie's shoulder. "You must be pretty special to him," he said. And with that Euan was gone, like an angel leaving a fleeting message.
A week later Evan was out of hospital and back at work, fully recovered from his snake bite ordeal. Susie had been too frightened to talk to him about what Euan had told her that night at the hospital. When Euan had left, Susie had gone into Evan's room and held his hand lightly while he slept it off. He had woken the next morning in an empty room, but Susie had accidentally left her police hat on the floor by the chair and it was the first thing Evan's eyes had fallen upon when he had woken up.
And now, a week later, Evan was wondering why she hadn't mentioned the hat thing to him, or even mentioned the bushwalking fiasco at all. Meanwhile, Susie was upset over the fact that Evan hadn't said anything to her about his single, rasped, semi-conscious word on the helicopter.
They worked through their days speaking very little to each other. They went overboard communicating with their other colleagues, which resulted in Susie and Amy's friendship being further cemented. And the closer Amy and Susie got, the more Amy's detective skills were twigged. Her antennae were up and buzzing and she could see what Susie was feeling. It was pretty obvious after all, or maybe it was just the detective in Amy that picked up on it. Amy approached Susie in the mess room one morning to talk to her about what she had been sensing.
"You haven't talked to Jonesy have you?" Amy asked, leaning against the bench as Susie poured milk into her coffee.
Susie put a teaspoon in her cup and stirred it, trying to ignore Amy's folded arms. "Nah," Susie whispered in reply. She so badly wanted to blurt out everything that was swimming through her head to Amy, even better to Evan, but she couldn't do it. It would probably be of little use to anyone anyway, and it sure wouldn't change anything if she did. She had become used to keeping her feelings inside, and felt it was the way things had to be now.
"You can talk to him you know Suse," Amy said with a smile. "He's not going to bite, and I think he deserves to know what you're feeling, don't you?"
"I don't know, that's the whole problem," Susie sighed, a lump forming in her throat.
"Well just talk to him and then you can find out!"
"But why hasn't he talked to me?" Susie sighed again, feeling like a schoolgirl with a stupid crush. "He hasn't even mentioned what he said on the chopper," a sad, let down look shadowed Susie's pretty face.
"Suse," Amy patted her back.
"I think that he just doesn't care anymore, he really doesn't," Susie's voice wavered. "He's just wants to forget completely about anything we ever had," Susie's hand went to her eyes, shielding the tears from her friend, and her shoulders trembled as the tears began to fall.
Amy could say nothing, as nothing seemed to be quite fitting enough. So she just put an arm around her friend and let Susie cry.
The next day a smiling visitor hobbled into the foyer and rang the bell. Amy, Susie and Jonesy were the only people in the station as the rest of the team had knocked off early for the weekend.
Susie, sitting bored at her desk, trying to catch up on her paperwork, jumped up, grateful to escape her paperwork for even just a few moments. She opened the door and entered the foyer, smiling at the girl, who leant heavily against the counter, two crutches propped against the counter beside her. "Hi," the girl stood up a bit straighter when she saw the blonde policewoman.
"Hi," Susie replied. "How can I help you?"
"I'm just here to see Jonesy," she stated. "Is he in?"
Susie was taken aback slightly. What did this girl want with Jonesy? As far as she knew Jonesy didn't know too many teenage girls. She shook her head out of her daze quickly though – she and Jonesy didn't know a lot of things about each other anymore. It was how things were, and she hated it.
Susie studied the girl, trying not to look critical or snobby. She was tall and slender, with a body like a dancer. She had sparkling blue eyes and her brown hair was streaked with what looked like natural blonde, obviously from the sun, as Susie also observed her beautiful tanned skin. She had a nice smile and a kind face, and the only thing that ruined the girls image was the chunky cast on her ankle.
Susie pushed back her feelings of jealousy. This girl was probably only 16 or 17, she told herself, but she could easily pass for nineteen. "Ahh yeah, I'll just get him for you," Susie stumbled on her words, making her flush with embarrassment. "Can I tell him who it is?"
"Renae Kavanagh," she smiled. "Renae from the bush," Renae chuckled to herself.
"Ohhhh," Susie at last made the connection and her mind eased for a moment. "Just take a seat," she said to Renae, gesturing to the seat with her right hand. "And I'll get him."
She walked back into the desk area and approached Evan's desk. He could hear her walking towards him and his heart did a little rhythmic tap dance in his chest, hoping she would say something he wanted to hear. Something he'd wanted to hear the whole time he'd been in the bush with Renae and ever since.
"Renae Kavanagh is here to see you Jonesy," Susie's voice was weak, and even though she wanted to say more, she didn't, and went back to her desk and buried her head in her paperwork. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jonesy rise from his chair and go into the foyer. And even though she knew she shouldn't, she couldn't help but watch him and Renae in the foyer via the surveillance camera screen that was mounted on the wall near her desk, enabling all in the desk area to see what was happening in the foyer.
Jonesy sat down next to Renae near the stations main entrance and they began to speak earnestly after sharing a hug. It was obvious they'd become close during their ordeal. How Susie wished she could get sound out of that surveillance camera as well as picture. She longed to hear what they were saying.
Jonesy and Renae talked on and on and before Susie knew it, it was 5pm and the end of her shift. She got up tiredly and shoved her incomplete reports into her desk drawer, deciding they could wait until Monday. Usually she didn't mind talking some work home with her, but not this weekend. She'd had enough of work, of everything, and just wanted to get away from it all. She felt like she'd been trying to run away from everything all week but had always been held back. But, now that it was the weekend, she could run at last without being held back.
After gathering her belongings from her locker, she decided to leave by the main door in hope of catching some of Jonesy and Renae's conversation. However, they were too quick for her, or perhaps too smart, and stopped talking and just watched as she walked into the foyer, came out from behind the counter and walked past them and out the door. Susie had blown her chance to eavesdrop, she knew and she cursed silently as she walked away.
As Susie exited, letting the door slam loudly behind her, Jonesy and Renae turned back to each other. "That's her isn't it?" Renae asked him, a sly smile on her face.
"What? Susie?" Evan blushed, looking down at his hands. "Yeah," he mumbled. "How did you know?" Evan was curious; women were such a mystery to him sometimes.
"Just by the look on your face," Renae smiled her kind smile. "She's pretty...why aren't you doing anything about her?"
Evan shook his head, feeling helpless, lost and frustrated, and not for the first time. And how in the world did Renae pick up on all this? How could she know exactly what he was feeling when sometimes he didn't even know himself? He shrugged his shoulders sadly at her.
"You're always thinking about her aren't you?" Again Evan shrugged, but he began lifting his head.
"Did you think about her when we were in the bush?"
"Yeah," Evan replied at last, looking Renae in the eye. How was it this girl knew him so well?
"Well then Jonesy, how many more excuses do you need to talk to her?" Renae laughed, taking the light hearted approach, even though she was certain it didn't feel like that for Evan. "She's not going to wait forever, trust me," Renae had that 'I know chicks' look in her eyes again, and Evan let loose, shook his head, and smiled."I know," he replied, sighing.
Later that night the group gathered for their usual feast in Chris's dining room, as they did most Fridays. A constant level of chatter was always buzzing around the table, but two members spoke very little, picking at their food instead.
Amy eyed Susie, who pushed her scraps of roast beef and potatoes around her plate with her fork. Susie's blonde hair hung delicately around her face, and Amy couldn't help but notice that it looked like Susie had done her hair nicely and then, now, judging by the look on her face, she had realised that she had no-one to do her hair nicely for. Amy felt sad all of a sudden as her heart went out to her new friend.
Amy shook her head though, breaking her stare towards Susie, and went back to her meal, joining in once again with the conversation that was going on between her colleagues. And Susie continued to push her food around her plate. She was waiting for the last person to swallow their last mouthful – then she could excuse herself and leave the table for the quietness of her room.
When at last PJ gulped down the last of his roast beef and gravy, Susie pushed back her chair, smiled and told the troops that she was having an early night. They all wished her goodnight and she walked away quickly from the chorus of goodnights and seeya Suse's.
She reached the stairs to the guests rooms, but then suddenly changed her mind and, deciding she needed some of that summer air she had got a taste of when walking home earlier that night, she headed to the beer garden at the back of the hotel.
It was surprisingly empty, but then Susie remembered everyone was inside where the sports channels were replaying the cricket on Chris's tv screens. Susie wondered over to the two long benches that sat by the edge of the beer garden, near a large bush of lavender.
She laid down on one of the benches and put her hands behind her head, and looked up at the stars. They shone brightly against the purple black sky of the summer night and after a while Susie closed her eyes, breathing in and letting the fresh night air fill her lungs. She lay like that for almost half an hour, the warm night air almost making her fall asleep. Just as she was about to drift off there on the wooden bench, a figure laid down on the other bench. Susie could hear their breathing quietly in the stillness of the night.
They didn't say anything as they lay there and neither did Susie. She even closed her eyes again, hoping whoever it was would just go away and let her stare at the stars by herself.
They lay there sharing the sky for several minutes. And then they spoke. "You left your hat in my room at the hospital," of course it was Evan. Susie should've known.
Susie jumped, but said nothing, so he continued. "In the bush..." Evan began, his voice hesitant. He took a deep breath and had another go. "In the bush, when I was out there, I was thinking about you...about you and me," he sounded so nervous and he knew it.
"Were you really?" Susie whispered. Susie wasn't sure where this was going to go. Would they just end up fighting again? That seemed to happen every time they got into a close situation such as this. Would things ever change between them? Was this the bend in the road where things changed between them? Susie had no idea.
"Yeah," he said no more, as if he couldn't find a way to put his feelings into words. He stared back up at the stars for a moment, wishing he knew what to say.
"I waited for so long at emergency waiting for them to bring you back," Susie whispered. "And then they whisked you away so quickly, I barely got a chance to see you," Susie shuffled uncomfortably on the bench as she spoke, remembering. "Euan told me what you said in the chopper," she said after a pause. She sat up and hugged her knees to her chest, connecting her gaze with Jonesy's at last. "Why didn't you ever say anything about it to me?" a tear slipped down her cheek.
Evan frowned, his forehead creasing. He sighed. "I meant too," he answered softly. "But I didn't know what to say, and I didn't know what you'd think."
Susie heaved her own sigh in response. "Haven't we had a conversation like this before?" she asked, remembering back to the day they shared such a similar conversation in the patrol car on that dusty road on the edge of town. It seemed like so long ago now.
"I know Suse, I know," Evan sighed. Evan's lack of explanation frustrated Susie, even though she knew it was difficult for Evan to expose his feelings. Something inside her made her want to try and sort out this thing between her and Evan though – they had been pussy footing around for way too long now, and Susie didn't know about Evan, but she didn't know how much more she could take.
"Is this ever going to work between us?" Susie asked with a sad sigh. "I care about you..." she paused, almost in desperation. "Don't you care about me?"
Evan was taken aback by Susie's heart felt question. His own heart ached, because for a moment he was hurt that Susie thought such a thing. There was no one on this earth that he cared about more than her. He sat up and faced her, taking in her sad features that glowed in the moonlight. "Of course I care about you," Evan replied strongly. He reached for her hand and held it.
"Then why didn't you say anything about the chopper to me?" she asked. "It's all I've been thinking about," her voice now just a whisper.
"I just...I just...don't know what to tell you," Evan's face showed how he felt inside, but Susie barely noticed. They weren't words.
"So when you said my name in the chopper, it meant nothing?" Susie asked, silently holding down the lump that was forming in her throat. "I mean when Euan told me that you'd said my name, I thought that it was because you'd been thinking about me when you were out in the bush. That out of anyone you could've asked for, you asked for me. I thought that meant something," Susie explained, pushing her insecurities and reservations aside and letting her feelings show. "I thought it was something special."
"It was," Evan whispered. "I just didn't know how to tell you how special – I still don't know how Suse, I wish I could tell you how special it was, and how special you are to me," he sighed, feeling defeated and low because he couldn't tell Susie what he wanted her to hear.
Susie heaved a sigh also and stood up. Evan stood up with her, hoping she would say something, rather than just walking away and leaving him there feeling even more defeated. She squeezed his hand. "I know I'm not making it easy, pressing you with all these questions, but I just want to know how you feel, so that I know if there is a future for us," she squeezed his warm hand again, and leaned over to kiss his cheek softly. As she pulled away, their skins brushing against each other, she smiled and looked deep into Evan's eyes.
He put his hand up to her face and looked just as honestly into her own eyes before Susie pulled away and let go of his hand. She walked slowly back to the pub, her arms swinging by her sides and her head down. As she reached the door she stopped, her hand on the wooden door frame, and turned back to Jonesy. He was facing away from her, not having moved from where he had been standing when she kissed him. "Jonesy," Susie said. He turned around to look at her. "When you know, when you're ready, you know where I am," and with that she disappeared into the hotel.
Several days later Evan and Susie found themselves alone in the mess room. Susie sat at the table, slumped slightly in her chair, stirring her tea intently. When Evan walked in, he gave her a tentative smile, as if he was afraid of what her reaction might be. But she simply smiled back in return and continued to give the teaspoon a workout.
As he stood with his back to her at the bench, Jonesy tried hard to gather some strength from within. He knew Susie was still just hanging in there and waiting for him, and she couldn't wait forever as Renae had so often reminded him.
Taking his freshly made cup of coffee, he sat down at the table next to Susie. Setting his mug on the table he said nothing, just reached over, cupped her delicate face in his hands and kissed her softly on the lips. Susie closed her eyes, tasting all the sweetness Jonesy's lips contained and she felt her heart give a flutter and her whole body got that warn tingly feeling all over. Evan pulled away and looked at Susie's face. Her eyes remained closed for a few fleeting moments as she revelled in the feeling she had needed for so long and finally got from the right person.
Her eyes fluttered open, and she saw Evan smiling at her, his eyes sparkling. Her eyes went to half mast as she smiled back, falling more and more in love with him with every second that passed. "There was a reason I said your name in the chopper," he whispered to her, grinning.
"WHERE IN THE WORLD IS SUSIE?" they could both hear Amy yell from the main area of the station. Susie immediately jumped up, her attention brutally dragged away from this special moment at exactly the wrong time. She headed to the mess room door, knowing Amy had a job for her. Evan jumped up out of his seat also, but didn't follow Susie. Instead he just stood by the table. "Suse, wait," he called out as she reached the door. Susie turned around, the smile still on her face. "Have I ruined it?" he was worried that his kiss had been at the wrong time, too soon, too rushed, and that was why Susie had said nothing.
Susie understood his concern. "No, you haven't," she whispered. "But I still just...I just need you to tell me...tell me that you love me," he smile a little weaker this time. And then she flew out the door.
After she left with Amy, Evan smiled. He knew what would make her believe it.
An hour later Susie radioed back to the station, telling Mark that she and Amy were at an old, derelict property near Widgeree, searching for stolen goods. Their estimated time of arrival back at the station was forty minutes.
It was just enough time, Evan thought happily. With PJ out, Evan went into his office and closed the door for privacy before picking up the phone and punching in a familiar number. The man he had been hoping for, an old friend from the Academy named Marty Wylde, answered Evan's call. Evan smiled. "Mate, it's Jonesy. I need a huge favour..." Evan began.
Susie sat back comfortably in the passenger seat as she and Amy headed back to the station. They had just left the property, seizing a truckload of the stolen goods Amy had been hunting for for weeks and it had put Amy in a great mood. So great in fact, that she had offered to drive, a task she usually left to a uniform.
She eyed Susie as she drove, noticing quickly the smile that kept creeping onto her face, and the way Susie's mind was a bit up in the clouds. "Did something happen Suse?" Amy asked, curiously. "Something good?"
Susie opened her mouth to answer, but was cut off by the radio as it crackled into life. "This is a general broadcast to all units in the Widgeree, Mt Thomas and St Davids area. We have a very important message for Susie Raynor from Evan Jones," Susie gasped in shock at what she was hearing.
"Susie, Evan wants to tell you he loves you more than heaven on earth, and he said your name in the chopper that day because he didn't want to be with anyone else but you from that moment on," the tears streamed down Susie's cheeks and Amy, equally as gobsmacked, pulled over to the side of the road.
She turned to Susie incrediously. "Suse," she whispered, beaming.
Susie cried tears of happiness. "He really means it. He really does," she cried, smiling through her tears. "He's finally told me he loves me," Amy reached over to hug Susie, whose body was limp from the shock and happiness.
"General broadcast to Widgeree, Mt Thomas and St Davids back on channel," the radio went back to sleep but then a moment later a song came on, drifting over the police radio airwaves.
'There will be changes in our lives again
Fortunes a wheel, it just likes to spin.
Round and around, we get spun around,
Till you don't know where you're going
But every step, every step of the way
Deep in my heart, I feel your love everyday.
When the curtain falls on the final applause
I will be there every step of the way
There are no maps for the journeys we make,
Running on wishes and visions and faith.
One storm in the journey can blow you away.
Till you don't know where you're going.
But every step, every step of the way,
Deep in my heart, I feel your love everyday.
When the curtain falls on the final applause,
I will be there every step of the way,
I will be there every step of the way.'
Susie listened, a lump in her throat and her eyes overflowing with tears. The song was right – there were no maps for life, and she needed someone to make those journeys with her. Someone to be there every step of the way.
Amy put her foot down then and sped towards the station, silently cheering at this turn around for her two friends. She stole a few glances at Susie as they drove and she smiled as she saw the look of joy present on Susie's face.
Evan sat outside on a bench by the station. The sun shone down on him, warming his shoulders. But it wasn't the suns warm rays that kept the smile on his face as he waited for Susie.
Then he heard a squeal of tyres and the silver Commodore, so often driven by PJ, roared up the side of the station, just metres from where he sat. The passenger door opened slowly and Susie's long legs stepped out of the car and she straightened up, squinting in the sunlight and looking in Jonesy's direction.
When he stood up and the smile Susie loved so much spread across his face, she knew she hadn't been dreaming. It was for real. He meant it.
She grinned ecstatically at him and ran into his arms. He lifted her up clear off the ground and held her, spinning her around. In a tight embrace, they kissed each others lips with all the passion and love their bodies possessed.
