After his completely insane encounter with Left Hand, Alucard made his way to the woods along the edge of the field. He wondered if perhaps he'd been laying out in the field in the sun, and that's why he couldn't remember anything after going to bed at the inn. Maybe the sun had only recently gone behind the cloud cover, allowing him a chance to come to. That could explain why the meeting with Left Hand had been so very odd. Maybe he had sun-sickness. Thinking of that, he wondered where D was. How could he see Left Hand and not see D? Something bobbed up from the shrubbery ahead, right next to the path he was walking on.
"D-Demon?!" Alucard asked. He was going to try to walk by the strange creature quietly before he realized why it looked familiar. Demon normally wore a lizard skin loincloth and this creature was garbed in what appeared to be a multi-color circus tent, but the pitchfork he held certainly looked like the one Demon carried, and there was something familiar about the way the creature appeared when he tried to look around the distracting striped pantaloons and hyper-colored puffy-sleeved shirt. Alucard closed his eyes tight, but the outfit was so "loud" it seemed as if it had left an afterimage on his retina.
"Boss, uhm, no! I'm Tweedledemon!"
"No! That would make me..." another voice cried out in protest.
"Tweedledum!" Demon cackled. "You got it!"
"I might be forced to wear this ridiculous outfit, but there is no way I'm going to be Tweedledum!" Sword floated up into view. Sure enough, as his words forewarned, Alucard's most powerful weapon was also hideously garbed in the fashion only a demented seamstress could have dreamed up. No, maybe the seamstress was merely delusional. And utterly color-blind.
"Whoa, partner! Your train of thought is a run-away!" Alucard blinked at Dracula, as the Lord of All Vampires appeared again in front of him.
"Now, Tweedledum," Dracula's voice was soft, but the emphasis on the name was as steel, "no more protesting the lovely matching outfits, hmmm? And of course your name has to correspond with that of your brother, Tweedledee." Again, the emphasis paid to the last syllable of the name.
Both of Alucard's familiars glared sullenly at Dracula and kept their mouths wisely closed against their twin protests, but Sword jostled rudely up against Demon so Demon shoved him back hard enough to send Sword staggering a few feet away.
"Now, why don't you two go run off and play?" Dracula suggested merrily, waving his hand airily in a "shoo" gesture. He watched, shoulder to shoulder with Alucard as Demon flitted off obediently enough, but Sword grumbled and floated after much less enthusiastically.
"In heavy traffic," Dracula finished. Alucard snickered, the comment was nothing he'd ever heard his father utter before, yet was utterly like him in a way. He turned, thinking to ask Dracula what was going on, to be confronted by only the fanged smile again. He watched as it disappeared, presumably following its owner.
"Did I just see -- whiskers?!"
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Author's notes -
::wince:: I probably shouldn't even try to write humor in the first place, and here I am attempting to carry it off with angsty dhampirs! What on earth is wrong with me?!
Next chapter teaser - Chapter Three - Tea, Thee and ? (I wonder just who this could be?)
Reviews, comments and constructive criticisms are always welcome! Please feel free to email me also if you see something awkward that needs to be clarified or fixed. I need all the help I can get!
stargarde (at) stargarde (dot) com