My Only Love Sprung from My Only Hate
Chapter Four: Trust
She floated in an abyss of nothingness. Her bonds had been severed from reality, and the eternal hands of time had stopped. The silence of this place was all-consuming, and the darkness stretched out to unknown horizons.
Anger, sorrow, happiness...she felt neither one. Her mind was at a state of peace. The conflicting emotions beneath her seemingly indifferent countenance were at harmony, at least for the time being.
Without warning, the silence gave way to the sounds of the ocean waves, and she could feel a cool breeze wrapping itself around her. Patches of light began to disrupt the reigning darkness, and she was slowly drifting away from the abyss...
The sound of her stomach growling had brought her back to earth. Because she was used to intense meditation, fasting was something Raven could deal with.
But even after two days and two nights without having anything to eat, she was bound to get hungry.
She stopped levitating and landed on the ground. The cliff that she stood on overlooked the glistening ocean and the formations of jagged rocks that jutted from the waters. The ocean wind whistled through the strands of her short hair as she made her way back to the castle. Even if only two days had passed, it seemed that the temperature had dropped. She pulled her cloak closer to her until she entered the castle. Although the hallways were still cold due to the fact that there was no such thing as heaters in the middle ages, the torches still provided some warmth.
Raven only knew where the entrance was and the location of her room. She had avoided Rorek since she had last spoken to him on the beach that one afternoon, so she had to find her way around this castle herself. She knew that she could very well ask him, but she felt uncomfortable about it. Even if she did want to ask him, he was nowhere to be found. It seemed that he had taken every precaution to stay out of her way as well.
After wandering around the intricate maze of hallways, she had found a room with a fireplace built in it. An iron cast cauldron hung on top of a pile of ashes and unused wood. There were cabinets and cupboards lined with dust, and a basin stood against the wall. A long table was in the center of the room along with several chairs.
Seeing how the kitchen was probably never used for a thousand years, the possibility of finding any edible food was nonexistent.
Raven felt her eyes beginning to water and she had the urge to sneeze. It must have been from all the dust that blanketed the entire place. She was used to living in dirty conditions because Beast Boy and Cyborg were her roommates, but stacks of unclean dishes and the changeling's toenail clippings on the coffee table couldn't compare to this.
She spotted an old broom and bucket in the corner of the kitchen, and she decided to get to work.
He watched her cloaked figure follow the path back to the castle. The ends of her cape billowed in the ocean breeze, revealing her slim figure underneath. A stray strand of her hair swept across her young face, but she brushed it back with her hand. Soon, she disappeared from his view as she entered the castle.
Rorek looked away from the window since there was nothing outside to keep his interest. For the past three days, he had stayed in his room and watched the empath meditate at that very same spot on the cliff that protruded over the beach. Her body would hover for countless hours until nightfall, and then she would go back to the castle to rest.
He didn't know any women from his era who showed the same self-discipline that the girl had. Then again, she was very different to begin with.
He was concerned when she had said that she wanted to be alone. He was not sure how she would handle what he had told her, so he obeyed her wish. Although he could understand why she would need some time by herself, he did not comprehend how meditating for two days straight would make the situation any better. He felt frustrated that he could not do anything to help her, for that was partially the reason that he had wanted to break the curse that bound him to the book.
His hand involuntarily went to his knee, which brought back memories of that one day. That was when she had used her powers to heal him. Her hands were warm as she cast her spell, but her face was so expressionless, even during the time she took to interrogate him.
He was aware of the means she had to go to in order to keep her emotions from slipping out of her control, but how could she live without even allowing herself to be happy or sorrowful? A life of watching people express their emotions when you cannot risk doing the same must have been a heavy burden on her shoulders.
His hand left his knee, and he closed his eyes and murmured a spell. White bolts of energy encircled his right arm, and then they disappeared after a few moments. Once again, he was regaining his strength and if his guest wished it, he would send her back home tomorrow.
...and if she still wanted to, she could seal him back into the book. Rorek had always been a man of his word, and this time was of no exception.
Usually, the cooking was left to Cyborg or Beast Boy. Raven wasn't picky about her food, and she could even tolerate one of Beast Boy's tofu dishes on occasion. However, she had never done anything that was culinary related save for boiling a kettle of water on a stove.
But hunger would drive you to cook your own meals as Raven had found out. While she was cleaning the dust-covered kitchen, she had discovered an old, thick booklet filled with recipes. She figured that if she had a guide of some sort she was less likely to burn down the castle.
She had chosen a recipe that looked the easiest, which had directions to cook a type of soup. The produce that it required were obtained by whatever she found in the garden in the back of the castle. How there were vegetables and herbs that weren't even in season yet that were ripe for the picking was something she decided to think about later. There was also a well in the garden that she used to get the fresh water for the recipe.
She had cut up everything and boiled the water in the cauldron. She added the vegetables and herbs like the recipe said, and now she was just waiting as the soup simmered.
So far, the soup had smelled decent. Feeling brave, she dipped a ladle into the soup and tasted. She blinked, and found that it wasn't half bad. It didn't taste anything like the concoctions that Starfire created, which was a big plus.
"Lady Raven..."
The smooth English voice sounded behind her, and sure enough the wizard was there with a look of astonishment on his face.
"I see that you've found the kitchen."
"It's not a problem, is it?"
He shook his head. "No, of course not. Please, make yourself at home. I'm afraid that I've been a rather poor host for not providing you anything to eat during your stay."
She shrugged, stirring the soup. "It's not a big deal. I can take care of myself."
Another tense silence settled between them as the soup bubbled. Raven stole a glance at him from the corners of her eyes. He did look a bit better after a few days of rest, but exhaustion still wore at his features.
She bit her lip, and then said, "It's about ready. If you get two bowls and spoons out, I can start serving it."
He gave her a guilty look. "I cannot, I did not even help you prepare it—"
"You're not going to get any better if you starve yourself," she reasoned. "You have to eat something."
Hesitating a bit, he finally went over to the cupboards and got out two bowls. Walking over to her near the cauldron, he handed her one of them and she filled it with the soup. He gave her the second one and she had done the same. For a short moment, the flesh on their hands brushed against one another's, and Raven felt her stomach doing flips.
Hurriedly turning away from him and doing her best not to express alarm, she rationalized the strange sensation by convincing herself that she was hungrier than she thought. She set the bowls onto the table, and Rorek took a seat across from her, placing the spoons between them as he did.
"It smells wonderful," he remarked.
Not being used to comments, especially about her cooking skills, Raven brushed it off and didn't say anything. She reached towards the center to get a spoon, but before she could even begin eating, something had stopped her.
Her eyes latched onto the wizard who was across from her, the spoon falling back onto the table with a clatter.
He had removed his scarf, revealing a perfectly sculpted nose and jaw line and a pair of thin lips. His face was unblemished and handsome, and in short, he certainly didn't look like he had been trapped in a book for a thousand years.
Raven could feel herself slightly blushing as she continued to stare at him in awe.
"Lady Raven, are you all right?"
Snapping back to her senses, she quickly retrieved her spoon and cleared her throat. "Yeah, I'm fine."
She began to eat, and when he saw her doing so, Rorek started to.
"It tastes as good as it smells."
Her cheeks were getting warm again, but she did her best to keep her impassive expression. "It wasn't hard to make."
"Still, it's very good," he replied.
She said nothing, hoping that they could continue their dinner in silence. She wasn't accustomed to getting compliments, especially from an attractive boy. Eating as quickly as she can, she got up as soon as she was finished and abruptly left the kitchen before Rorek could stop her.
Upon seeing his entire face for the first time, she could feel her stomach tying itself in knots.
"What's happening to me?" she asked herself. The way she had acted back there was something that she wasn't very comfortable with, especially after she had just undergone almost three straight days of uninterrupted meditation.
Her heart still pounding and her mind in a state of restlessness, she decided that she needed to meditate more. She left the castle and returned to her spot on the cliff that overlooked the vast ocean. The crescent moon smiled at her from its corner in the black sky, and the ocean wind swept through her cloak and her hair.
She levitated above the ground and crossed her legs. Her hands rested at her sides, and she took a deep, calming breath. Her mind somewhat at ease, she closed her eyes and began chanting.
"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos...Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos..."
The chant loomed in the night air as she meditated, and she could already feel herself becoming more tranquil. The strange feelings that she was experiencing began to subside, and she was again under the peaceful trance of meditation.
Until, of course, she had heard footsteps behind her.
"Lady Raven?"
She sighed irritably and stopped levitating. Putting her hood over her face, she turned around to face her host.
And to her surprise, she felt slightly disappointed that he was wearing his scarf again.
"What is it?"
"You just left in such a hurry. Is everything all right?"
"I told you before, I'm fine."
She turned her back on him, trying to be interested in the ocean below her instead. However, even the majestic movements of the water couldn't ease her anxiety. Raven expected to hear footsteps pacing back to the castle, which would indicate to her that he was going to leave her alone.
However, she heard no such noise. He was still standing motionlessly behind her.
"Why are you still here?" she asked.
"Forgive me, but may I ask you something?"
"If I answer it, will you leave me alone?"
There was silence, but then he replied, "If you wish me to."
"Then what's your question?"
"...why do you dislike me so much?"
She was taken aback by the sheer bluntness of his question. "What?"
"The past couple of days, it seemed that you have gone to every mean to avoid me. Is it because you dislike me?"
"It's not a matter of disliking," she snapped.
"...then is it a matter of trust?"
Not even Starfire was this straightforward. As if he hadn't caused her so much agitation tonight already!
...but why would he care whether or not she trusted him? What would it matter?
"I apologize," he spoke again. "You have already answered my first question. I will leave you alone as I said I would."
She could hear him leaving now, but the questions that ran through her mind refused to let him go.
Turning around, she questioned, "Why did you bring me here in the first place?"
He halted in his steps, and he looked back at her.
"You had a reason, didn't you?" she prodded. "Tell me what it is."
The faint moonlight illuminated his long mane of silver hair, and his crystal blue eyes stared at her from under his long bangs. Her heartbeat had increased a bit at the sight, but she did her best to disregard it.
"...I brought you here because I want to help you."
Her resolve to maintain her emotionless appearance crumbled right then and there. Her eyes had shown her disbelief; she was sure of it.
Much to her relief, Rorek didn't comment on it and continued. "Lady Raven, I know that you have been trying to suppress your emotions for fear of losing control over them. I know that what Malchior has done to you runs deeper than any flesh wound ever could."
Before she could even protest, he had cut her off. "The night that I had broken your curse, you were in danger."
Her dark eyes widened and were suddenly transfixed on him.
"Ever since you sealed Malchior back into the book, I have sensed it. There was a demonic presence that wanted to take over you, and you were trying to fight it."
Memories of a taunting voice and a whirlwind of dark energy crossed her mind. She remembered feeling helpless, feeling as if her mind had snapped in two and there was a darkness that had tried to suffocate her...
"You are trying to fight it even now, are you not?"
She stared at him, both of them knowing very well what the answer was.
"Like you, many people were victims of Malchior," he said. "He has broken many lives beyond repair, and I was unable to stop him because I had failed to slay him."
She sensed the bitterness in his last words, and she noticed that his hands had tightened into fists and were slightly shaking at his sides.
"Lady Raven..." he finally spoke, "I want to help you, and I will do everything in my power to do so if you allow me."
No more words were exchanged, and Raven's eyes left him and returned to the view of the ocean. She said nothing and listened as he walked back to the castle, his footsteps fading away in a matter of a few minutes. She was left alone again with her thoughts as her only company.
As much as she hated to admit it, Rorek was right. Although she had defeated Malchior, feelings of animosity and frustration still lingered after his betrayal. She had to spend more time meditating to keep her emotions in check, and she became more withdrawn from her friends than she normally was.
There was something that was slipping away from her control, and she feared that if it did, she would be unable to restrain it.
But how could Rorek help her? More importantly, how can she trust him when she didn't know him and vice versa? If there was a way that he could help her, what did he intend to gain from it?
...then again, Rorek didn't give her any reason not to trust him. If he truly was Malchior, he could've transformed into a dragon and continue his plans of world domination. And as she had concluded earlier, she would be of no use to Malchior if he was able to free himself from the book.
Taking another deep breath, Raven left her spot on the cliff and drifted downwards onto the beach. Her blue boots lightly padding across the wet pebbles, she walked along the shore while the water lapped at her feet.
She had a lot of things that she needed to think about.
He awoke early in the morning. He looked out his window and saw that the light of the dawning sun was just beginning to eat away at what was left of the night.
This would probably be the last time that he would see the sunrise. Four days have passed, and he promised the empath that he would send her back home.
Even if she decided not to accept his help, he would hold no resentment for her. He still hated himself for not being able to kill Malchior a thousand years ago, and she did not blame her if he had hated him as well.
He was not lying when he said that he wanted to help her. He knew the damage that Malchior was capable of. In fact, many people found it difficult to recover from what he had done to them. There were even some who did not recover at all.
He did not want her to be like that. He did not want her to spend the rest of her life carrying scars that will never heal, not when there was so much for her. He did not want her to suffer the fate that so many have experienced at Malchior's hands.
With one last look at the dawning sun, he left his room and headed downstairs. Perhaps he could enjoy a walk on the beach before he would have to teleport his guest back to her home.
When he had reached the beach, he found the young girl standing at the edge of the water already. She was still wearing her long cloak, but her face was not hidden underneath her hood like always.
"Good morning," he greeted her.
She returned his greeting, but there was something that told him that she had something more important to say.
"I have fully recovered, and I am ready to take you back whenever you want—"
"I need to talk to you."
He was surprised at her directness, but recovered quickly. "What do you wish to talk about?"
Her round, amethyst eyes glistened gently in the sun's faint rays as she looked at him silently before speaking again.
"I've decided not to go back just yet."
His eyes widened at her remark. "Does that mean...?"
"You said that you would help me, right?"
He nodded solemnly. "Of course. I swear on my honor that I will."
"You understand that if you betray me—"
"If I do any such thing, you can drown me in this very ocean."
She regarded him silently with her dark, mysterious eyes and said, "Then I'll hold you to that."
He knew that she was not being amusing, but neither was he. However, despite the seriousness of the situation he could not help but feel that her acceptance of his aid was a sign that she was gradually beginning to trust him.
A small smile formed from underneath the black cloth of his scarf at the thought.
"Oh, and another thing."
"Yes?"
She looked at him gravely with the blank expression he was already familiar with.
"Just call me by my first name from now on."
AUTHOR'S NOTE
Yay, another chappie completed!
Hehe, thanks again for your support everyone! I'm really happy that people like reading this story 'cause I've put a lot into it!
Oh, and Kanaye, I know about the whole debate about whether or not Malchior or Rorek was the one who deceived Raven. Although I respect your opinion, I believe that it was Rorek, and that's how it's going to be kept in my story. I mean no offense to you or anyone else, but I thank you for your criticism and your kind words.
Until next time, take care everyone!