Anyway, guess what? This is the last chappie. Indeed. Thanks to all of you who've been following up with this fic, and by God, it's the longest-running one I've ever written (I'm more of a short-story kinda person). Hahah. Thanks all of you! It's been real fun!
And oh yes, before we go on to the story, my usual thanks to those who last reviewed:
auggy1984-- Yeah, it sucked indeed. Lol.
whoopiepiez-- :) Aren't most males clueless? (Hahah, kidding kidding)
beama-- Yep, Hana's Mom died. Sorry if I didn't make that too clear, but I mentioned it in Chapter 4 (Ignorance is bliss) :p. Let's see what Ephram does.
colorado2-- Well, I hope you're satisfied with this ending. Hope you all are!
Hana sat on those steps in the dark for a long time, not knowing how much time had passed. She wondered if Ephram was looking for her. She wondered if he was still staring at Amy. What was holding him back, she wondered. Why couldn't he just go over to her and say whatever it was he needed to say?
It was then that Hana decided. If she couldn't have him, the least she could do was help him as his friend. She would make them talk.
She took a few deep breaths and released them. Thankfully, she hadn't cried too much. Boy, that would've made for a lot of trouble for her, trying to cover up the mess she would've made to her face. Getting up to her feet, she brushed off the back of her dress and took her time walking back to the auditorium. Once she got there, the music slammed into her senses. She slowly made her way past the rows of white-clothed tables, until she finally reached theirs. But Ephram wasn't in his seat. Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder and she spun around. It was him.
"Where have you been?" Ephram asked with furrowed brows, his voice worried. "I've been looking for you all over".
So he had noticed she was gone. Hana forced a small smile, concealing her true feelings. "I just stepped out for some air".
"Oh". Ephram studied her concernedly. "You okay?"
"Yeah," she nodded. She swallowed the stubborn lump that tried to rise in her throat and turned her face away from him.
"Come on, let's dance!" she exclaimed brightly over the music, pretending, and pulled him along, disregarding whether he liked it or not.
But just as they reached the dance floor, the fast song that was playing ended and a slow one started. The two of them looked at each other uncertainly for a moment, lost, then Ephram shrugged his shoulders carelessly and laughed. He pulled her closer and took her hand, placing it over his shoulder. Hana gulped as he put his other arm around her waist.
"S-sorry," she stammered nervously.
"Sorry?" he asked her softly, not understanding.
"Yeah...I've never slow-danced before, so sorry if I'm terrible at this," she confessed with an embarrassed smile.
"It's okay...neither have I," he admitted with a laugh. Hana broke into a grin at this, feeling a little better, but not much.
As they continued to move with the music with the rest of the people on the dance floor, Hana began to relax. Against her own inner turmoil, she sighed and rested her head against his shoulder, wondering why of all people, he had to be the one she'd had to fall for. She felt so safe in his arms, his warmth like a cradle enveloping her.
"Never thought you knew me
Never thought of you with me
Always fighting in the dark before
Never got to tell you
I don't know what I mean to you
No need to explain anymore"
For a moment then, buoyed by the music, she could let herself believe that he felt the same way about her as she did about him. She closed her eyes as they moved their feet to the melodies, letting them wash over her.
"But I'd cry
I would die if I lost you
I'd cry..."
She couldn't help it. The music, everything, was getting to her. Tears squeezed out from beneath her tightly-closed lids and fell, staining onto his suit jacket. Hana was horrified, but all of a sudden she couldn't hold them back.
"Hana?" Ephram said, feeling her warm body tremble slightly against him. But she didn't look up. Well...perhaps it would be easier for him to say the words he wanted to tell her this way.
"Hana...I have a confession to make..." he whispered into her ear and stopped, nervous. Hana still didn't respond. Tell her you coward, he pushed himself on. "The reason why I'd wanted to come tonight was...was so that I could see Amy again. I don't know..." he laughed bitterly at himself. "I guess I thought tonight would somehow magically change things. That Amy would finally see me". He sighed and breathed in the scent of Hana's hair as comfort, wondering if she'd noticed.
"But the thing is," he continued slowly, "I realised just now that I've been really dumb. I've been so busy trying to catch the attention of someone who doesn't even care that I exist that I haven't noticed something that's been staring at me in the face".
What was he trying to say? Hana wondered. She refused to look up at him for fear that he would see her tears.
"I guess...what I'm trying to say is..." he drifted off again. "Hana will you please look up?" Ephram pleaded and tilted her chin up towards him. Hana winced and tried to turn away but it was too late. He'd already seen the tears on her face. "What's wrong?" he asked, shocked.
"I'm sorry...I'm really trying my best to be your friend, Ephram, but I just can't do it. I can't," Hana exclaimed, dismayed that he had caught her out. She pulled herself away from him, stepping back.
"I can't because...because I love you," she confessed, not believing what she'd just said. But there. She'd said it. And now her whole world would crumble. Ephram was stunned. Horrified, she turned away to leave with what was left of her dignity, but just then, she felt his hand pull on her arm, not letting her go.
"Stop," she heard him say. "Hear me out, Hana," he swallowed. She took a deep breath and turned herself around to face him defeatedly. What could he possibly have to say?
"I wanted to tell you that it's not Amy I care about anymore, Hana. It's you". He came in closer, willing for her to listen. "All this while, you've been the one that truly cares about me, not her," he implored, his green eyes burning with intensity. "Amy's not real, Hana, you are".
Hana's breath caught with shock. She'd never expected in a million years that this was what Ephram had wanted to say. "You're telling me...that you're choosing me over Amy?" she whispered. Ephram nodded solemnly and wiped the tears from her face with his fingers, not even caring that her make-up was smudged. In fact, it only made her seem more vulnerable and endearing.
Right then, Hana did something that she'd wanted to do for a long, long time. She leaned in towards Ephram, closed her eyes, and gave him a sweet lingering kiss on the lips. She was pleasantly surprised to find that it was better than she'd imagined it would be. And the most amazing thing was that he was kissing her back. Warm delicious tingles ran through her body to the tips of her toes. Hana laughed then, happy and relieved, and he pulled her tighter against him. They continued to dance, and this time, she didn't cry.
"And you know you held me up
Held me to the sun when I was yours
And I know I let you down
Let you down the day that I was gone"
Unbeknownst to them, Amy witnessed all this, and she smiled at them over Colin's shoulder as he held her. She was glad that finally, everyone had gotten their happy ending.
Hana sat down at Ephram's desk, reading the very essay that had been the catalyst that had brought them together in the first place. She hadn't realised that there had been more that she hadn't gotten to read when Mrs Hemingway had interrupted her.
My Fatal Flaw continued:
"It probably won't work out that way, though, since things will keep changing. That's one thing I know a lot about: whether you like it or not, stuff keeps happening all the time. And not always for the better. Usually not, it seems. But maybe it gets easier.
Hopefully that first change doesn't hurt too much, it doesn't kill you, you don't lose any limbs or an eye -- or a friend. Then you figure you can do it again. It's like when you have to move something really heavy, like a couch, or a car that ran out of gas. You can hardly budge it at first, but once it finally starts to move, it gets a lot easier to push the rest of the way. As long as you don't stop pushing. So I guess you can keep changing... a little at a time, once you get started. You sort of have to, because if you don't -- if you stop and freeze up again -- then you still have that same flaw you started with after all. So you just have to take a chance. Push yourself. Take that first step outside the box and hope it's not too horrible.
And enough small changes can eventually add up, until finally you really are different. Even enough for other people to notice, not just you. That probably has something to do with growing up".
That pretty much summed up Hana's entire past year. "Hey".
Hana looked up as she heard Ephram's voice, and saw him poke his head out over the edge of the doorway to look at her, green eyes twinkling.
"Ready to go?" he asked her with a smile. He was already wearing his jacket for their ice-skating expedition at the frozen lake.
"Yeah," Hana replied and got up from the chair. She kissed him on the lips and grinned, looking into his eyes. "Let's go".
She couldn't wait to see what Senior year would hold for them, but right now, they were going to have the best time of their lives.
The End.
Lyrics from Cry by Alex Parks.