Don't Stand So Close to Me
Chapter 5
The Trouble With Beaches
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Snape had decided, with utmost reluctance, to enjoy himself.
The main problem with this was that a beach was no place to forget about someone.
For one thing, romance was practically shoved down your throat. Restaurant advertisements showed a couple dining, hands intertwined. Sailing advertisements showed a nearly identical couple laughing happily together. The boat was probably anchored, Snape thought sourly.
Being alone walking on the beach didn't help at all. The sand was pleasantly soft – he had unbent enough to go barefoot. After all, no one knew him here. The air was cool and sharply salty, he could taste it. At first, he had found the endless crashing of the waves to be distracting. But it had gradually grown on him, and now it was almost soothing. The oceans persistent roar drowned out some of the lingering screams in the back of his mind.
But not the memories, never the memories.
Snape stepped into the water and winced. His spoiled feet were sensitive to the saline water – it stung, but still felt invigorating. He could now almost see the sun on the horizon.
As he waded, he let his mind relax for the first time in years. Yes, he was still alert – that would never leave. But no one was demanding anything of him. No lives depended on how well he did. No students were there to gripe about him. No one had any expectations of him that he had to fulfill.
It was freeing. It was frightening.
And here, maybe, he could rid himself of this terrible side-effect of an errant potion!
Snape walked down the beach, so immersed in his thoughts that he almost didn't notice the huge rocks jutting out into the sea. They were beautiful in that intimidating way – harsh, unyielding...
Snape left his reverie with an almost audible snap.
There was a girl on top of the rocks, perched comfortably, reading. A girl with her bushy hair pulled back into a knot to keep it from flying in her face. If Snape squinted, he could make out a faint glow from the pages of the book she was reading. And that, if nothing else, convinced him that this was indeed the person he wanted to see last at this point in time.
Hermione Granger flipped the page of her book. She could feel someone watching her, but it was probably just another lonely, desperate guy hoping that she was available. Which she absolutely was not, at least as far as they were concerned. Finally, getting tired of the relentless gaze, she wrenched her eyes from her book in irritation. There, standing below here, was...
Professor Snape?!
In ... a bathing suit?
Though privately, he did look pretty damn good. This image was not going to be very helpful as far as focusing on Potions went. Sure, he didn't have killer muscles. But then again, he did spend most of his time brooding over simmering potions.
Snape had equally disconcerting thoughts running through his mind. They all involved Hermione. In various positions.
Her slim figure made him painfully aware of his physical flaws, particularly the flab he had examined in the mirror earlier. Sure, Hermione's hair was not particularly smooth and silky, but that...that was endearing! His nose was in no way endearing, and didn't even come close to 'cute.' If he ever had the nerve to kiss her he'd probably poke her eye out.
"Professor Snape?" she said hesitantly, sitting up. Some of her hair escaped from its tangle and fell over her face – he just wanted to –
Severus Snape! Control yourself!
"Hello, Ms Granger," he said coolly. Or at least, he tried to make his voice chill. He wasn't sure how well it worked.
"I'm simply ecstatic to see that you remember your teachers' names," he said drily. Oh, Merlin, did she see that my hands are shaking?
"What, precisely, are you doing out here?" he inquired, perhaps more sharply than he intended to keep the quaver out of his voice. She wasn't dressed like most of the people were – she was wearing a huge shirt over her bathing suit. Snape thanked his lucky stars for this – had she been wearing a bikini and nothing else, it would have been even more difficult to sound normal.
"I'm taking a vacation with my parents," she said rather indignantly. She had that look on her face – the you-ignorant-bastard look she seemed to reserve especially for him. It was terrible. It was disgust and contempt and irritation all rolled into one look and thinly masked. It was...oddly like the looks he gave people. That in itself was almost enough to make him turn tail and run.
Ahhh! Snape, you ass, you're doing it again! the ass in question resolved to not let himself get carried away again. He nodded to Hermione (Miss Granger!) and made what would be best called a strategic retreat, repeating the mantra in his head all the while –
She's a student, Severus, she's a student, she's a student, she's a student...
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He was no closer to achieving his goal. And he was uncomfortable.
Snape was lying on a towel, on a beach. He had tried to work in his hotel room, but the amorous couple next door was more than a little distracting. Didn't they have any consideration for the rest of the continent, who was forced to listen to their activities?! Not even a bloody soundproof wall worked, because as soon as it kept one couple's racket out, the children in the room on his other side started throwing temper tantrums. He finally gave up and left, hoping that the beach would be more peaceful. It was better, despite the delighted shrieks permeating the air. He had brought along a towel to lie on, and had cast a Cooling Charm over himself. Snape had a pile of books sitting beside him, all with Familiarity Charms on them. It was a particularly useful charm Snape had picked up ages ago; it turned something unusual into something the onlooker expected to see. He imagined muggles looking at his books would see muggle novels or something similar. He had everything worked out perfectly. So he should have been having a relatively successful day.
He definitely was not. For one thing, there was absolutely nothing in these books about how any potion of his could have inadvertently had the effects of a love potion. In fact, from what he had read, it was pretty much impossible. How the bloody hell was he supposed to find out what was going on, then? For the first time, books had failed him. He was at the end of his rope.
He muttered in irritation, cursing fluently in several different languages he had picked up over the years. After a few minutes of this, he relaxed. Obviously, he was getting too worked up about this. Maybe he would just lie here for a bit...
Maybe it was the sun – Snape was a Slytherin, after all, and snakes loved to lie in the sun. Perhaps it was because he had had a long day yesterday. It could even have been that because this place was so blatantly muggle, it didn't invoke his paranoia like most places seemed to.
Whatever the reason, Severus Snape was fast asleep, lying on the beach.
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A/N
I'm terribly sorry this one is so short. See, Severus told me he wants to stay on the beach, and I'm trying to make him move his greasy little ass, because I have excellent things planned for him later. But he told me all he wants to do is relax on the beach, because his parents never let him even see the ocean when he was younger, and didn't ever let him play at the beach...
As I'm sure you can guess, Sev is actually quite petulant with me. Quite the pain in the ass, really.
Snape: (indignantly) I am not!
Grand-Illusion: snorts
Anyway, the point of the matter is that exciting chapters will return as soon as I knock some sense into him. And yes, I know that I promised comments to reviewers...
Kerichi – Yes, that occurred to me that Hermione might not look so hot. But for three reasons, she does: 1 – she dances. 2 – to fit the song better. 3 – she's naturally thin feels jealous You an I have similar evil cogs in our minds...that bit about tans is coming up next chapter. It was actually one of my reasons for making him go to a beach. snicker yes, as you can see, I'm dealing with my headstrong characters.
I'm happy for all of you who reviewed that you loved the Snape-in-a-bikini scene. Glad you enjoyed it!
Thanks to Natsuyori and Nelys1 for continued support.
Jenn – thanks for your encouragement! feels head swell I think we have similar ideas about what makes a good story...I DO try...
Please don't irritated about chapter length! I write as it comes. If you have an issue with that, take it up with my muse or Sev.