Hey! I hope I updated fast enough for you all :D Thank you all for the reviews!! I hope you enjoy this… not quite sure of your reactions!

Please review!

The Truth Behind The Scars

The girls climbed the stairs to Ross and Rachel's apartment, after Chandler had left they meet up with Phoebe for lunch and now they had given up on shopping for the day.

"Hey guys…" Ross greeted girls as they walked in.

"Hi honey…" Rachel smiled, kissing his cheek softly.

"Where's Chandler?" Noticing that he wasn't there.

"We sent him home early, he didn't look to good." Rachel told him.

"Is he okay?" He asked Monica.

"I don't know anymore…" She sighed, "I thought he was doing better since everything with his Dad but these last few days…"

"Maybe you should talk to him…" Phoebe suggested.

"Yeah, I will later." Monica agreed.

"Coffee?" He offered, the others.

They all accepted and he went of to make, leaving them to carry on gossiping. The phone stopped him and he reached over to answer it, carrying it into the kitchen where it was quieter.

"Hello… oh hey man… What?!" Panicked took over him as they listened to the caller, "What the hell happened?! Yeah, yeah, okay we're on our way!!"

XxXxX

Joey paced up and down the hospital corridor; tear stains visible on his cheeks. He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to work out what was going on.

"Joey?!" He heard Monica call out tearfully, racing towards him with the others close behind.

"Oh thank god, you guys are here…" He whispered.

"Why? What's going on?!" Monica demanded, "Where's Chandler?!"

"I don't know…they won't tell me anything…" Joey said, nearly breaking down again.

"It's okay, Joe…" Ross put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "take your time, tell us what happened."

"I came home earlier, I felt guilty because Chandler was going to start work on the baby's room on his own…" He took a deep shaky breath before continuing, "I found him passed out of the floor in the nursery."

"Oh my god…" Monica cried, gripping tightly onto the Ross for support. "Why? What's wrong with him?"

"I don't know…" Joey shook his head, "the paramedics think it might have something to do with the paint fumes but I haven't been told anything…"

"Paint fumes?" Phoebe questioned.

"He didn't have the windows or doors open…" He explained quietly.

"I'm going to find out what's going on!" Monica harshly brushed away her tears, telling herself that it wasn't serious.

They watched her walk away, looking each other, not knowing what to say. Ross sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"He'll be okay…" He stated, "it just routine, they'll make sure there's no damage to his lungs or whatever from the fumes and he'll be out of here by tonight…."

"Ross, I don't think its as simple as that…" Joey looked over at him; his eyes filling with unshed tears.

"What do you mean?"

"He wouldn't wake up…if it was just the paint fumes he would have waken up or stirred or something when I dragged him out!" Joey told them, "I tried for 20 minute but he didn't move once…. I thought he was dead!"

"Oh my god!" Rachel covered her mouth as she let out a small sob, realising the seriousness of the situation.

Ross closed his eyes, pulling Rachel closer to him. As more nervous took over him the more he began to fear the worse. He should have done thing, he should have noticed. Chandler had been his best friend since college, he should have helped him.

He only opened his eyes when he heard footsteps coming towards them.

"Mon, what did they say?"

"Said the doctor will come and talk to us in a minute…" She said quietly before looking up, tears spilling from her eyes, "Why won't they let me see him? What's wrong with him?"

"Nothing, Mon…" Rachel put a comforting arm around her, "He'll be fine…okay?"

She didn't reply just simply nodded, before starting to walk off again.

"Where you going?" Ross stopped her from going any farther.

"I've gotta phone Mom to let her know what's going on…I was meant to pick Robbie up 10 minutes ago…" She told him, "and we need to get hold of Nora…."

"Mon, sit down…" Ross pushed her gently into a chair, "I'll deal with it."

She opened her mouth to argue but then changed her mind, realising she needed to here in case the doctor came.

"Okay, thank you…" She mumbled, looking to the floor.

Ross crouched down and pulled her into a hug. "He'll be okay, I promise…"

She nodded again and dried her eyes, as he stood back up. He hugged Rachel and Phoebe quickly and patted Joey on the shoulder before going to find a payphone; silently praying that he was right.

"Where is he?" Nora came running towards them, 10 minutes after Ross had called her to let her know what was going on. "Where's my Baby?!"

"We haven't been told anything yet…" Ross sighed, looking down into his cup, where his coffee had long gone cold.

"He's going to okay, though isn't her?" She pleaded.

"We don't know…"

"Oh my god…" She whispered, crying.

Before anyone could say anything or do anything to comfort her a doctor stopped in front of them.

"You here for Chandler Bing?" He questioned.

"Yes, I'm his wife…" Monica jumped up.

"And I'm his Mom.." Nora added, as the rest of them all stood up, waiting for news.

"How is he?" Joey asked. "Is he okay?"

The doctor sighed and looked over the group of concern people, he turned slightly so he was facing Monica and Nora, "We should go talk were it more quiet, follow me…"

They all shared worried looks before walking after the doctor.

"I'm sorry but only family are allowed…" He said sympathetically to the other 4.

"They are family!" Nora stated firmly, telling him that that they should be there to hear what he had to say.

"Okay then…" He sighed again, showing into a small room.

"So, what's wrong with him?" Monica asked once they were all seated. "He is going to okay, isn't he?"

"He'll be fine…" The doctor gave them a reassuring smile.

"Oh that's great… can we see him?!" Nora asked.

"Not yet, I would like to talk him first…"

Ross frowned, "Why did he collapse him the first place then?"

"That's what I need to talk to him about," the doctor told him.

"Please, can I see him?" Monica begged, she need to see for herself that he was fine.

"I'm sorry but in these kind of situations it's best if I talk to him first…" He explain, "I'll be back soon to let you know more."

The gang fall silent as the doctor left her room; they all clung onto each other for support. They were all relieved that Chandler was okay but also worried about the reasons why he was there in the first place.

"What does he mean, 'this kind of situation..' what's he trying to say?" Joey broke the silence.

"You don't think…you don't think he did this on…on purpose…." Rachel stuttered out, not really wanting to say the words.

"No, no, no…Chandler wouldn't do that!!" Joey stated but then quietly added, "Would he?"

"I knew there was something wrong with him!" Ross stood up and started to pace around the room, angry with himself for not doing anything. "I should have done something about it!"

"Ross, honey this isn't your fault…" Nora cried, she couldn't believe that they were in this situation. "Chandler's never been good at talking about his problems."

Monica heard what they were saying but couldn't bring herself to say anything. She wanted to shout at them for being stupid, there was no way Chandler would do this to himself but she was to scared of what the real reason behind it was to do anything other then sit and pray, holding one hand on her stomach.

"I know he's been through a lot lately…" Phoebe started, trying to keep hold of her emotions. "But suicide…why? Why would he do it?"

"I don't know, Pheebs…" Ross told her, as Joey tried to comfort her.

"He should have talked to us!!" Rachel cried, anger rising inside her. "Why did he do this? What help is it?!"

"Alright, Rach…calm down, okay…" Ross soothed, pulling her into his arms.

"I'm so angry with him!" She admitted, crying quietly, "I know I shouldn't be but he shouldn't have done this…I don't want him to die…why would he put us through this?!"

"Rach, none of us wants him to die…" Ross said, "Maybe it was just a cry for help…"

"Stop it, stop it, stop it!" Monica screamed, jumping up. She couldn't take it no more, she couldn't listen to them talking about Chandler like that.

"Mon…" Rachel moved towards her, but she back away.

"This is ridiculous, this is Chandler we're talking about!!" She glared out them, cries streaming down her face, "Y'know, my husband? Your friend? Your Son? How can you think like this!?"

"We know its hard, Mon but he has been through a lot lately…" Ross started.

"No, no!!" She cut him off, "He wouldn't do this!! He might have been through a lot but he was happy!!"

"I'm with, Mon…" Joey stood up and walked over to her, "Its not Chandler."

"He was happy!" Monica stated again, "I mean, we're having a baby next month…you tell me he's not happy!!"

"Oh god…Mon, I'm so sorry…" Rachel cried, thinking it over. "I shouldn't have said those things, I know Chandler would never do something like this!"

They all turned around when they heard someone clear their throat.

"Am I interrupting anything?" The Doctor from before asked.

"No, no..please just tell us what's going on.." Monica begged.

"Okay, first off…I heard what you were talking about…" He started, "I'd like to clear up that this was not a suicide attempted."

"I know…" Monica said straight away, not for once thinking other ways, while the others looked around guilty for not having faith in their friend.

"Your husband collapsed from a mixture of exhaustion and stress…" He explained.

"So, it wasn't the paint fumes?" Joey questioned.

"Well, that didn't help but he would have collapsed anyway…so no, it didn't…" He told them.

"When can I see him?" Monica asked, "When can he go home?"

"You can see him in a few moments but I want to keep him in a few days just make sure…"

"Right, okay…" Monica nodded, as the others all started mumbling their relief to each other.

"I'm also going to request that he sees a psychiatrist before he leaves…"

Everyone fell silent and looked at him.

"What?" Joey demanded, "He might have pushed himself a little hard lately but he doesn't need a shrink!!"

"I'm sorry but I think that there is more a problem then it appears to be…." The doctor firmly stated, "and it's not just a case of him pushing himself to hard."

"Then what is the case?!" Nora asked.

"The reason for the exhaustion this that Chandler has not had a nights sleep for a month."

"What?" Monica went white as she slowly sat back down.

"That's crazy!" Ross exclaimed, "are you tell me that a month ago, Chandler decided he didn't want to sleep anymore?!"

"I haven't be able to get him to talk about it much but the way I see it is he's been having nightmares…" The doctor told them, the statement making Monica look back up. "He's been waiting for everyone to be asleep before sitting up all right, drinking coffee…"

"You can't be serious…" Nora looked shocked.

"I'm afraid so.…" He said sadly, "it appears anytime he would fall asleep, he would force himself awake in fear of having nightmares…"

"When did all this start?!" Ross asked.

"I'm not sure…"

"The day of the funeral…" Monica told him, cutting the doctor off, everyone looked over at her.

"You knew he was having nightmares?" Rachel asked.

"The night of the funeral, he woke up screaming..crying…I thought it was just some kind of delayed shock to his Dad's death…" She cried, "after a week, they stopped…I thought he was fine…"

"When in fact, the nightmares didn't stop, he just stopped sleeping…" The doctor sighed, "and to keep himself awake he would drink enormous amount of coffee plus do something to keep his mind working."

"Oh god…"

"I think it might be best if you all go to talk to him…" The doctor advised, "let him know you're there for him."

"We're here for him no matter what!" Joey whispered, tears burning in his eyes.

The doctor nodded, "Okay and try and get him to talk about…he's told me a bit but he won't open up about what the nightmares are about."

"He doesn't like talking about things that scares him…" Nora added, "he never has…whenever anything frightened him when he was little, he wouldn't come to me and tell me…he would go hide under his bed and wouldn't come out until it was safe."

The other 5 looked at each other, at any other time they would laugh at the thought of Chandler, huddled up under his bed but they couldn't…not at a time like this.

"Follow me and I'll show you were he is…" The doctor said gently.

They all silently walked into Chandler's, they all thought back the tears as they saw him sleeping peacefully; all of them feeling guilty for not noticing or doing anything.

They moved forward when they saw Chandler's eyes flutter open.

"Mon?" He looked around at her.

"It's okay…I'm here…" She smiled at him; tears of relief spilling down her face.

"Please don't cry…" He whispered, reaching up to brush away her tears.

"I was so scared…I thought I was going lose you…"

"I'm so sorry…" His eyes filled with tears, "I didn't mean to hurt you…"

"Chandler? Why did you do it?" Nora asked, taking hold of his hand.

He looked around at them, his wife, his mom, his friends, the doctor…all-waiting for him to explain.

"I…I…do..don't know…" He stuttered, looking down at the white blanket that covered him.

"Chandler Bing, I know your lying!" His mother said sternly. "Was it because of the nightmares…"

Chandler simply nodded, his eyes still looking downwards.

"What were they about…" Monica asked gently.

Again Chandler remained silent, tears lined his eyes but he refused to let them fall.

"Were they about your father?" She asked, waiting for a reply but only got a single nod.

"Chandler? Is this about what you said in the tree?" Joey asked, everyone looked confused at him, even Chandler. "Y'know about you telling him that you hated him just before he died?"

Chandler thought back to when he told Joey that and then he thought about the nightmares he had, with his Dad blaming him for his deaths.

"Chandler, he knew you did hate him…" Monica squeezed his hand, predicting that this was all about the guilt Chandler felt. She was shocked when Chandler pulled his hand away from hers.

"I did hate him!!" He said, "I still do!! I hate him… he's dead and he's still ruining my life!!"

"Okay, Chandler…"

"NO! Its not fair!!" Chandler whispered, "I just wanna get on with my life…"

"Well to do that, you need to talk about this…" The doctor interrupted him, "you need do that to get over this…"

"What's there to talk about?!" Chandler asked, annoyed, "he ruined my life whilst he was alive and now his even came back to haunt me!!!"

"Tell me about these nightmares, Chandler…" The Doctor said.

"What? Tell you how damn terrified that if I sleep I'll have them? Tell you how every time I do have them I think they're real? That I'm going to die? That something going to happen to Robbie and Mon? What the hell do you want me to tell you!?" Something inside Chandler snapped, he couldn't hold it all in anymore. Not only has it been eating him up inside from since his Dad's death but also for his whole life, he just hadn't noticed it before.

Monica grabbed his hand again and held it tightly; she had never seemed him this scared before.

The other exchanged glances, shocked by his outburst as the doctor moved forward, eager to get Chandler to open up.

"Why do you think you're going to die?" He asked, Chandler stared at him. "Your Dad? Has he ever hurt you?"

"He left when he was 9 and then came back into his life a few years ago…" Ross started to explain when he realised chandler wasn't going to say anything. "They were meant to go travelling but his Dad pulled out last minute…"

Te doctor nodded, "okay, so he's hurt you've mentally…what about physically?"

Chandler closed his eyes tightly, hoping that it would stop the tears from falling but one managed to escape and roll down his cheek slowly.

"Chandler?" The doctor prompted gently.

He took a deep breath and slowly opened his eyes again, he look straight at the doctor. The others looked concerned at each other, never seeing that look in eyes before. He didn't look like their friend Chandler; he looked like a scared lost child.

"I'm not meant to talk about it…" He mumbled, nearly unheard before he turned on his side to face away from them.

TBC

Please review…like before… the more reviews the faster I update :D