Wow! My review box is nice and full! I had to make extra food for Forte
and Jack, seeing as they get one food item per review. :)
Forte: You have alterted me to the dangers of the burritos. I will be MUCH more careful around Taco Bell now... I never knew what danger I was in! Anyhoo, so very glad you like. Take all the food you want.
Jack: Better wipe off your computer, seeing as it's all wet and that will make it mad at you. And I don't want to take credit. *hides* Your reviews make me very happy, thanks a ton!! FOOD GALORE!
Well, onward we go, to that Cheatu-type-place thing. FINALLY I get to put the Twins in!!!! *grins like a maniac* Also, in case you don't know, "Mero" is short for "Merovingian." Now it will make more sense.
~*~
Mero: Welcome.
Lupe: 'Sup Frenchy.
Morpheus: Blah.
Mero: Blah blah.
Morpheus: Blah blah blah.
Mero: Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah..... cause and effect.... blah blah blah....... cake...... blah blah blah blah blahblah. Le Blah.
Lupe: Zzzzzzzz.... mmm cake... zzzzzzzzz........
Mero: Blah blah blah blah blah. Blah. Blah blah blah.
Morpheus: Makes perfect sense.
Albino dudes sitting in corner: *snicker*
Lupe: Hi!!!! *waves*
Neo: Don't go there. *smacks Lupe*
Mero: Blah.
Lupe: Hey Merovervore... merofuzz..... whatevertheheckyournameis..... you're French, right?
Mero: Yeez.
Lupe: So what do you call French toast? Just toast?
Mero: Um.... I don't know.... I never eat ze toast, I prefer ze waffles.....
Lupe: Riiight. But what about French bread? Do you call that bread? And then what do you call regular bread? Bread bread? Normal bread? American bread? And how about the French horn? And-
Neo: Brain.... imploding..... *attempts to duct tape Lupe's mouth*
Lupe: *kicks him* I mean, really. And do the people from Belgum eat Belgian waffles? And do they eat English muffins in England? And how about-
*Suddenly there was a noise like an imploding jelly-filled waffle being pulled through a VCR filled with talking hotdogs, as something strange happened to the fic! Dum dum dum......*
The Twins watched the proceedings from their corner table, peering over identical pairs of sunglasses. The conversation between the Merovingian and the newcomers was proving interesting, especially when the teenaged girl got into the action. They kept a close eye on her. She was the one the Merovingian had assigned them to kidnap, and they were waiting for the oppurtune moment.
"What's with her?" One said as the girl began ranting about French toast, for reasons he could not fathom.
"We don't know," Two replied, running a hand through his silvery dreadlocks. Both watched in scilence for a while. Then the girl looked back over her shoulder. Eyes met sunglasses, and-
"Hold on a minute!" Morpheus screechd, making an incredible jump to land between Lupe and the Twins. "Something's up here!"
"What do you mean?" Two asked, extremely puzzled.
"It's obvious," Morpheus continued. "The writing style's changed, the details have increased, and YOU TWO are about to become a major part of the plot, which is degrading into the generic kidnapp-the-teenage-girl, author- wish-fufillment thing. This can only mean one thing."
"And what's that?" Neo added, stepping over to join the conversation, because the Merovingian's "cause and effect" speech was about to put him to sleep.
"It means-" Morpheus began, "That THE AUTHOR'S A FANGIRL!!!!! WE'RE ALL DOOMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" shrieked Neo, Trinity, the Twins, the Merovingian, Persephone, and several random customers who had no idea what was going on, but thought they should join in anyways.
"There's only one thing to do," Morpheus stated. Then he punched Lupe right in the stomach.
"Ow! What was that for?" Lupe said, clutching her midsection.
"Well, seeing that this is a major self-insertion fic, YOU are essentially the author, and this is the only way I can knock some sense into her!" With that, he whacked poor Lupe again.
Suddenly, with a loud ZAP and a smell like strawberry-kiwi yogurt, the AUTHOR spoke to the rebels!
"Why are you punching me?" she boomed in a voice like thunder, or like two metal pot lids smashing together, whichever is louder.
"Because this fic is degrading into a hopeless act of fangirlisim!" Morpheus shouted back. "We want you to turn this fic back into a good, stable dialouge-type-thing. And get those two," he added, pointing at the Twins, "out of the picture, except as the secondary characters they were meant to be."
"And what if I don't want to?" the author said, rather brattily.
"Then THEY-" here Morpheus grabbed the Twins by their dreadlocks- "are going out the window!" As luck would have it, there was a window next to them, and beneath it was a pond of hydrochloric acid filled with piranahs and sharks with freakin' laser beams on their heads.
(I knew that would come in handy, the Merovingian thought)
"Nooooooo!!!" the author shrieked. "Fine, then!" With a sound like a malfunctioning purple typewriter being eaten by a yak, the fic returned to normal.
Morpheus: Much better.
Author: You're mean. *sniffs*
Morpheus: Tough.
Author: I wouldn't say that to the author if I were you. I can do anything I want to! It's my fic.
Morpheus: Oh yeah?
Author: Yeah!
*Suddenly Morpheus is wearing a fluffy pink bunny suit*
All: *laugh*
Morpheus: *blushes* Fine, I'm sorry.
Author: Good.
*Morpheus's bunny suit vanishes. Now the Merovingian is wearing it*
Author: But the Twins get to be in this fic. I promise it won't be fangirly anymore.
Morpheus: Fine.
Mero: What about ze bunny suit?!?!?!?!?!
Author: You're stuck with it! hahahahahaha!
Trinity: It suits you.
Mero: Yeez, I find it matches my pink slippers.... I mean, Hey! Shut up!
Lupe: Hey, Author, if you're me, and I'm you, then..... that would mean... we... I mean I.... I mean you...... I mean...... *collapses from brain overload*
Morpheus/Neo/Trin: LUPE!
Author: Don't worry, she'll be.... I mean I'll be... I mean... we.... us..... it..... um.....*collapses from brain overload as well, which is rather difficult seeing that she is a disembodied voice*
Twin 1: And we thought our speech inpedement was confusing.
Twin 2: *rubs head* That Morpheus is mean! Our hair hurts!
Twin 1: We knew we should have gotten a buzz cut.
Morpheus: Oooookay. Well, let's get out of here. *grabs Lupe*
Neo: Wait, we need the Keymaker.
Trinity: Right.
Persephone: I can lead you to him. But you have to give me something first.
Neo: What?
Persephone: A kiss.
Neo: ............
Trinity: Hey!
Persephone: That's all I'm asking. One kiss. Then you can have your keymaker.
Trinity: *snarls*
Lupe: *wakes up* Wait! I have an idea........
~*~
CLIFFHANGER!! Oh, man, I'm evil. *heh heh heh*
Review and you get quiche. This is a food with cheese and veggies and eggs in it. It causes practically no gas and is much more unique then cookies. Yay!
Forte: You have alterted me to the dangers of the burritos. I will be MUCH more careful around Taco Bell now... I never knew what danger I was in! Anyhoo, so very glad you like. Take all the food you want.
Jack: Better wipe off your computer, seeing as it's all wet and that will make it mad at you. And I don't want to take credit. *hides* Your reviews make me very happy, thanks a ton!! FOOD GALORE!
Well, onward we go, to that Cheatu-type-place thing. FINALLY I get to put the Twins in!!!! *grins like a maniac* Also, in case you don't know, "Mero" is short for "Merovingian." Now it will make more sense.
~*~
Mero: Welcome.
Lupe: 'Sup Frenchy.
Morpheus: Blah.
Mero: Blah blah.
Morpheus: Blah blah blah.
Mero: Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah..... cause and effect.... blah blah blah....... cake...... blah blah blah blah blahblah. Le Blah.
Lupe: Zzzzzzzz.... mmm cake... zzzzzzzzz........
Mero: Blah blah blah blah blah. Blah. Blah blah blah.
Morpheus: Makes perfect sense.
Albino dudes sitting in corner: *snicker*
Lupe: Hi!!!! *waves*
Neo: Don't go there. *smacks Lupe*
Mero: Blah.
Lupe: Hey Merovervore... merofuzz..... whatevertheheckyournameis..... you're French, right?
Mero: Yeez.
Lupe: So what do you call French toast? Just toast?
Mero: Um.... I don't know.... I never eat ze toast, I prefer ze waffles.....
Lupe: Riiight. But what about French bread? Do you call that bread? And then what do you call regular bread? Bread bread? Normal bread? American bread? And how about the French horn? And-
Neo: Brain.... imploding..... *attempts to duct tape Lupe's mouth*
Lupe: *kicks him* I mean, really. And do the people from Belgum eat Belgian waffles? And do they eat English muffins in England? And how about-
*Suddenly there was a noise like an imploding jelly-filled waffle being pulled through a VCR filled with talking hotdogs, as something strange happened to the fic! Dum dum dum......*
The Twins watched the proceedings from their corner table, peering over identical pairs of sunglasses. The conversation between the Merovingian and the newcomers was proving interesting, especially when the teenaged girl got into the action. They kept a close eye on her. She was the one the Merovingian had assigned them to kidnap, and they were waiting for the oppurtune moment.
"What's with her?" One said as the girl began ranting about French toast, for reasons he could not fathom.
"We don't know," Two replied, running a hand through his silvery dreadlocks. Both watched in scilence for a while. Then the girl looked back over her shoulder. Eyes met sunglasses, and-
"Hold on a minute!" Morpheus screechd, making an incredible jump to land between Lupe and the Twins. "Something's up here!"
"What do you mean?" Two asked, extremely puzzled.
"It's obvious," Morpheus continued. "The writing style's changed, the details have increased, and YOU TWO are about to become a major part of the plot, which is degrading into the generic kidnapp-the-teenage-girl, author- wish-fufillment thing. This can only mean one thing."
"And what's that?" Neo added, stepping over to join the conversation, because the Merovingian's "cause and effect" speech was about to put him to sleep.
"It means-" Morpheus began, "That THE AUTHOR'S A FANGIRL!!!!! WE'RE ALL DOOMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" shrieked Neo, Trinity, the Twins, the Merovingian, Persephone, and several random customers who had no idea what was going on, but thought they should join in anyways.
"There's only one thing to do," Morpheus stated. Then he punched Lupe right in the stomach.
"Ow! What was that for?" Lupe said, clutching her midsection.
"Well, seeing that this is a major self-insertion fic, YOU are essentially the author, and this is the only way I can knock some sense into her!" With that, he whacked poor Lupe again.
Suddenly, with a loud ZAP and a smell like strawberry-kiwi yogurt, the AUTHOR spoke to the rebels!
"Why are you punching me?" she boomed in a voice like thunder, or like two metal pot lids smashing together, whichever is louder.
"Because this fic is degrading into a hopeless act of fangirlisim!" Morpheus shouted back. "We want you to turn this fic back into a good, stable dialouge-type-thing. And get those two," he added, pointing at the Twins, "out of the picture, except as the secondary characters they were meant to be."
"And what if I don't want to?" the author said, rather brattily.
"Then THEY-" here Morpheus grabbed the Twins by their dreadlocks- "are going out the window!" As luck would have it, there was a window next to them, and beneath it was a pond of hydrochloric acid filled with piranahs and sharks with freakin' laser beams on their heads.
(I knew that would come in handy, the Merovingian thought)
"Nooooooo!!!" the author shrieked. "Fine, then!" With a sound like a malfunctioning purple typewriter being eaten by a yak, the fic returned to normal.
Morpheus: Much better.
Author: You're mean. *sniffs*
Morpheus: Tough.
Author: I wouldn't say that to the author if I were you. I can do anything I want to! It's my fic.
Morpheus: Oh yeah?
Author: Yeah!
*Suddenly Morpheus is wearing a fluffy pink bunny suit*
All: *laugh*
Morpheus: *blushes* Fine, I'm sorry.
Author: Good.
*Morpheus's bunny suit vanishes. Now the Merovingian is wearing it*
Author: But the Twins get to be in this fic. I promise it won't be fangirly anymore.
Morpheus: Fine.
Mero: What about ze bunny suit?!?!?!?!?!
Author: You're stuck with it! hahahahahaha!
Trinity: It suits you.
Mero: Yeez, I find it matches my pink slippers.... I mean, Hey! Shut up!
Lupe: Hey, Author, if you're me, and I'm you, then..... that would mean... we... I mean I.... I mean you...... I mean...... *collapses from brain overload*
Morpheus/Neo/Trin: LUPE!
Author: Don't worry, she'll be.... I mean I'll be... I mean... we.... us..... it..... um.....*collapses from brain overload as well, which is rather difficult seeing that she is a disembodied voice*
Twin 1: And we thought our speech inpedement was confusing.
Twin 2: *rubs head* That Morpheus is mean! Our hair hurts!
Twin 1: We knew we should have gotten a buzz cut.
Morpheus: Oooookay. Well, let's get out of here. *grabs Lupe*
Neo: Wait, we need the Keymaker.
Trinity: Right.
Persephone: I can lead you to him. But you have to give me something first.
Neo: What?
Persephone: A kiss.
Neo: ............
Trinity: Hey!
Persephone: That's all I'm asking. One kiss. Then you can have your keymaker.
Trinity: *snarls*
Lupe: *wakes up* Wait! I have an idea........
~*~
CLIFFHANGER!! Oh, man, I'm evil. *heh heh heh*
Review and you get quiche. This is a food with cheese and veggies and eggs in it. It causes practically no gas and is much more unique then cookies. Yay!