Disclaimer: All characters ('cept Tina) belong to Fox, Joss, etc... a.k.a., not me.

Pairing: B/A, B/R

Rating: PG-13

A/N: Remember that time when I said the next update should be in a few days? Look at how I lied! I cannot apologize enough for the complete lack of updates lately (as in a year), and I have no excuse. Please oh please bitch-slap the frell out of me, I'm willing to take it. I will work so hard at being disciplined, and I will try my best to update at least every week. I will finish this story whether it kills me or not. Preferably not.

By the by, the word 'frell'? Not mine. From "Farscape". Watch "Farscape". Be Happy.

Thanks to: Pretty much everyone that is still reviewing even after a year has gone by. Alicia08 and Emba in particular, thanks ya guys! Big hug! Unless you don't like touching people.

Dedicated to: Oy, to Jill Valentine. The-disciplined-one. She who writes fic nearly every hour of every day! All hail the Depp-lover!

You know, so many people completely overlook the importance of ice cream and its healing capabilities. Take cookie-dough for example. Your day goes by, anger and heartbreak mounts with each passing minute. Yet one lick of this delectable treat sends you into a creamy heaven, the dough blocking any pain that might reach you.

But even four scoops of Chocolate-Chip-Cookie-Dough isn't enough to overcome the amount of crap that I had to go through today. I met my mother's lover, her dish on the side, her private pool boy, her secret boy-toy that she only takes out when Daddy's away on business. He, Mr. Angel O'Connor, wants me to confront my mother about their "situation". Tonight. As in right now . How? How the frell am I gonna be able to do this? I don't know what to say, how to act... should I be blunt and throw it in her face? Or should I be gentle and pretend that I'm okay with it? Whose feelings should come first: mine or hers?

Just to let ya know, I really, really want mine to be first.

So I'm gonna take another route completely, and find out why things have gotten so bad between my parents. I don't really know much about their past, or how they even met. I've always pictured my dad seeing her across a flowery-meadow, and everything gets really fuzzy (since that's always what happens when you meet your soulmate), and then they would feel a magnetic pull towards each other as their hearts cried out as they finally found their mate.

"Hey mom," I ask, while she stuffs her face with cookie-dough-fudge-mint-chip ice cream.

"Yeah?"

"How'd you and Dad meet?"

She looks up slowly, surprised by the question.

"I dropped a bunch of books on his head."

"Oh," well, there goes the fuzzy-scenario. I can't help but feel disappointed, since, as their daughter, it is my duty to come up with the most un-realistic possibility for the both of them, shooting all that true-love fluff into every corner of the story. Too bad it's just that: a story.

"Tina, is everything okay? You've been pretty withdrawn lately, did something happen at school?" she questions, and I can't help but wonder how dumb she thinks I am. Because lets face it, she's not the Queen of concealment, it's not that hard to notice mom's pathetic excuses. Uncle Giles always said that she was the worst liar he ever met.

"It's mainly stress. You know that ten-page research paper due next week?" I asked, and she nods her head. "Yeah, I should probably start that."

"You probably should."

Okay, now we're steering off course here. I'm gonna change the subject immediately, especially before she asks about my last physics project. "So, when you and dad met, was it like love at first sight?"

She looks at me again, and I can tell she's getting uncomfortable with the conversation... too damn bad. I'm gonna get answers and I'm gonna get them NOW! Boy, when did I become so assertive?

"Well," she begins, "Kind of. I mean, your father was really nice. He made a joke, and it was funny. I can't remember it right now, I'd have to ask Willow. She was there with me when it happened. But love at first sight?" She shook her head. "I had just gotten out of a really deep, long relationship just a few months before. When I met Riley, I don't know. I just wasn't looking for something new. Your father just kind of landed on my lap. Figuratively speaking, of course."

Figuratively? I hope so.

"What happened in your last relationship? Did he turn out to be a big dud?" I'm really trying not to notice the light in her eyes when I asked that. Was she talking about Angel? He seems fairly dud-ish, but one might say that I'm just a tad bit bias. Ooh, look at that chunk of cookie dough, I'm gonna eat it.

"Oh, it was just a relationship. You know, fell in love, things got hard, we broke up. Typical boyfriend-girlfriend stuff," she says, casting her eyes downward. Me-thinks mommy's hiding something. Gosh, whatever could it be?

"So you and dad, how'd you finally get together?"

She raised her eyebrow at that, "Where are all of these questions coming from?"

"My never-ending well of curiosity, oh dear mother of mine. I mean, I have a right to ask these questions, right?"

"Of course you do, honey," she says quickly, placing her hand on top of mine. "It's just, you've never been interested before, I was just wondering."

"Uh-huh. So, how'd you and dad finally get together?"

She retracts her hand off of mine, and it looks like she's thinking back to when she was nineteen. "We became friends at first, although I think your Dad always had a bit of a crush on me. Who can blame him?" she smiles, and continues, "I just started seeing what a great guy he was, and we ended up on a few picnics and dates. Our relationship just kinda grew out of that. And it became good, and stable."

And boring. No fuzziness. No magnetic-pull. Dang.

"When'd you know that he was the right guy for you? The one that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with?"

Her eyes grew dark and sad, with a tinge of.... fear? "Tina, I don't think..." she cut herself off, looking deep into her melting ice cream, watching it drip onto her manicured-hand. "It wasn't really a decision we made, Tina. Some things just sorta happen."

Gee, can she vague that up for me a little?

"Like what things?"

She takes a deep breathe, folding her arms into her lap. "Tina, I love you. You know that right?"

I nod, of course I know that. That's at least one thing I've never had to question.

"To go cheesy on you, you're the light of my life. The best friend that I ever had. Nothing can ever, or will ever, change that. Please keep that in mind."

I nod again, fear gripping my vocal chords. I don't see what mom and dad's beginnings have to do with me, and I don't know if I want to know.

"Your father and I were just starting our relationship, and we were having fun. Then I skipped a period, and things got different."

Oh. My. God.

"You married dad because of me? Because you got pregnant?" I ask, hardly believing it. I knew she was a young mother, but I thought I had been planned. I want to be planned. My parents are both perfectly sensible, they know how dumb it is to give birth to a child without having a plan. Especially for a baby like me-- Christina Joyce Finn, the personification of fussiness.

"We didn't marry just because of you, we still really enjoyed each other's presence, and we thought... knew it could work out. You were just a bonus."

I don't believe her.

"Mom, I don't believe you. Were you and dad seriously ready to get married? Like, seriously, seriously?"

She took a bite of the goop-formerly-known-as-ice-cream before she answered. "No, we were not ready. And yes, technically, technically , we got married because of you. Because I was pregnant with you. But we really wanted you. And we did really care for each other, and we still do!"

No. No mom you don't care anymore. At least, not about dad. Because if you did, if you seriously, seriously did, then I wouldn't have had a male-substitute tell me today about your affair with him. This hurts, this hurts really, really bad.

Why-oh-why won't the earth swallow me whole right now? I need to tell her, I can't put it off anymore.

"Mom, please, just stop."

She looks concerned, "Stop what?"

"Lying! Quit lying to me," I shout, my voice rising to the ears of the other patrons. "Quit lying to me, mom," I whisper, my shoulders slouching in defeat.

"What are you talking about?" she asks, her voice shaking.

"I know mom. I know it all."

"Know what? What are you talking about Tina?" she asks again, and I can practically see her grasping for imaginary straws.

"Angel. I know about Angel. About what you've done, what you do," I can feel my lips quivering, and I'm once again wishing for that hole to take me to Wherever Land.

She just sits there in stunned silence, her little pink plastic ice-cream spoon crashing on the metal table in front of us. The spoon makes a loud clashing sound, rouring in my ears as I look up to meet her eyes.

The ice cream has failed tonight, as both my mother and I feel a brand new wound ripping open. I doubt it'll heal soon.

TBC... for real this time! So, what'd you think? Have I lost my spunk? Oh, and good 'ole B/A action is just around the corner, but I gotta push through mother-daughter depressing stuff first.