Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation.

Your Worst Nightmare

Chapter 04: What is this?

Watch him laugh, with all his cruelty. Watch him gently smile, before crushing all my love.

Why is it, that when I can only tell him how I feel, he just tells me that I am stupid, or just simply wasting my words? What is it, inside of him, that makes him so cruel? And why is it, that he has to be that what to -me-? I tell him all the time... I always let him know... That I love him. But all he gives me in return is a horrible remark.

Hiroshi says that he believes that Eiri really does love me; even if he never says it. But if Eiri -does- love me, then why wont he let me know? It makes no sense at all.

Damn.

Why did I have to leave like that? Why couldn't I have done what I always do? Just deal with it and wait for Eiri to be in a better mood. But it's so hard!

Maybe I should just rest for a little while. Yeah, I'll just rest my head down on this pillow here.

So nice of Hiro to let me stay with him for a while...

-

"Shuichi?"

"Nng... Go away! I'm tired," Shuichi whined in response.

"Shuichi. Wake up."

"Eiri?" Shuichi opened his eyes and sat up on the couch. He blinked a couple times to focus his vision. He looked up at Eiri, an expression of worry on his tired face.

"Eiri?" He questioned. Eiri let out a sigh, then kneeled down to capture Shu's lips in a soft kiss.

When the writer pulled away, he said, "You know that I'm not very good with saying how I feel, and shit like that."

Shuichi nodded, smiling up at his lover. "Yes, I know," he said in reply.

Though words were soon forgotten, as the two were lost in another kiss. This time though, Eiri was a little more forceful.

-

Soon, Shuichi found himself under Eiri's naked form, moaning softly from Eiri's light kisses down his neck.

"No, Eiri," Shu told him. "We can't do this on Hiro's couch." Eiri shook his head. And made a shushing noise. He continued to lay his soft kisses down Shuichi's small body. "Eiri," Shu whined. "Why can't we just go home to do this?"

"Quiet, Shuichi," Eiri whispered in his lover's ear. Shu has chills up his spine from it.

"But we don't have any lube, it'll hurt too much without it. So let's just get out clothes on and do this at home. Please?"

But Eiri just chose to ignore Shuichi's words. Shuichi made whining noises, closing his eye's tightly, trying to be quiet and let Eiri do what he wanted.

Soon, Shuichi's legs were up on Eiri's shoulders, and Shuichi just knew that he was going to be in pain soon. And soon was sooner than he thought, as he felt Eiri's erect cock pushed into his body. Shu couldn't help but yelp out in pain. It really hurt!

"Eiri, please don't! It hurts!"

Memories of when Eiri had first decided to take Shuichi fled into Eiri's mind. How he whined, telling him to stop. But he pushed those thoughts away so he could think of Shuichi, and only Shuichi.

To Shu's surprise, it got much more gentle. He didn't understand why, but it was nice. Feeling Eiri move in and out of him was a delight. He'd missed this over the time he and Eiri we fighting, even though it really wasn't that long.

A loud moan of pleasure passed through Shu's lips as his forceful orgasm hit. He heard Eiri moan quietly.

"Shuichi, you need to get up, you'll be late," Eiri told him. Shuichi gave him a look of confusion.

"What?" He asked.

"You're going to be late for work, Shu. Come on, wake up."

Shuichi's eyes snapped open as he was looking up at Hiroshi. "Hiro?" He asked.

Hiro smiled down at his friend. "Geeze, Shuichi. Having a good dream that you didn't want to wake up from?"

"Good dream indeed," Shuichi mumbled quietly.

Hiro ignored the remark. "Well, get dressed and lets go."

-

"It just seems that in my dreams he's getting to be a lot more kind to me. I like the dream Eiri a lot... Y'know?"

"So your nightmares are turning into what you want your life to be like?"

"I guess that's a way to explain it," Shuichi said, then sighed before continuing. "It seems more like my -real- life is a nightmare!" He was joking, and to show it he laughed a little.

Hiro just shook his head. "When's Suguru coming back?" He questioned, looking over at the clock. "He said he'd be gone for five minutes... It's been fifteen."

Shuichi shrugged. "Maybe he got caught up in something," he suggested. Suguru then came in the room.

"I got caught up in nothing," the boy snapped angrily.

"Okay, then where were you?" Hiro asked, tuning his guitar up idly. Suguru scoffed and didn't answer. Shuichi looked from Suguru to Hiro.

"Let's just work on the song," Shuichi suggested with a nervous smile. Both Hiro and Suguru nodded quietly in agreement. "Good," Shu said.

"Though, I did get an idea for you Shuichi," Suguru said quietly, pulling out a piece of paper from his folder. "On the lyrics... I was looking over the chorus last night, and thought maybe it would be a good idea to change something."

Shuichi stood up and walked up behind Suguru, looking down at the sheet. It was the lyrics for their newest song, 'Poisoned Kiss'.

Suguru pointed to a line. "I think you should change, 'It's a poison I love and want. I long for your kisses, while hoping to survive your poison.' to 'The addictive poison is what I want, and I long for your kisses, while hoping I will see the light of tomorrow.' What do you think?"

Shuichi had an irritated look. He had never liked when Suguru had ideas to change lyrics. Especially when Suguru's sounded better. "Do whatever you want. I don't care."

Both Hiroshi and Suguru looked at their friend with a hint of shock. Usually Shu and Suguru would end up in an argument, Hiro pulling them apart.

Shuichi walked out of the studio, and walked through the halls of N-G. 'It doesn't matter. They can do what they want with the song. I don't feel like doing anything with it.'

Ryuichi was skipping through the hall, holding tightly onto his Kumagorou. He was also singing a bright and happy tune. Though he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Shuichi. "Eh? Shuichi! What's wrong?"

Shuichi stopped in his tracks. "Oh. Hi Ryuichi," Shuichi said with no tone in his voice.

"Hm? Are you okay? You don't look good, na no da!"

"I'm fine. I just need to go take a nap or something."

"Oh! Well, Tohma is sending me home. Kuma-chan was a very bad bunny!" Ryu said, holding his Kumagorou up, looking at it with a glare. "I told you not to play with Tohma-kun's things! Bad Kuma-chan!" He scolded. He then looked back to his pink haired friend. "You can come take a nap at my house if you want!"

"I'd like that," Shu mumbled, turning to leave the N-G building. Ryu quickly began following his friend. "And when you wake up, we can play video games! Pika pika na no da!"

Shuichi usually would have smiled at his older friend, but not this time. Ryu knew something was bothering the younger man. At this, his attitude changed. He said in a very serious tone, "Shuichi-kun, what is it that's bothering you?"

"It's nothing, Ryu," Shu told him. "Nothing's bothering me." But Ryuichi shook his head.

"I know it's something. You're not glowing today."

Shuichi looked up at his friend with tears in his eyes. "Oh Ryuichi! It was Eiri! He was so me-"But Shu stopped, his eyelids starting to fall. He crashed to the floor, unconscious.

-

"Shuichi. Come on! Wakey, wakey!" Ryuichi called into Shu's ear. Shuichi woke, and looked up at Ryuichi.

"Before you ask the cliche, 'Where am I?' you're in my house in Tokyo," Ryuichi told him. Shuichi smiled up at his friend.

"Thanks, Ry-"

Ryu cut him off, "I called Yuki-san. He's using the toilet right now. He'll be out in a minute. He was really worried about you and came here right away."

"Eiri's here?" Shuichi asked.

Ryuichi nodded. "Hai! I called him and he sounded worried, na no da! So he came here as fast as he could, and he was also being a big meanie! He said bad words to me!"

Shuichi smiled slightly. "Thanks for calling him. I re-"

"Get up and lets leave, brat." Shuichi looked up and saw Eiri standing there.

"Oh... Eiri. I'm so-"

"I told you to get up." Shuichi nodded and got up. He smiled at Ryuichi and then left with the author. When they left Ryuichi apartment, Eiri's arm wrapped around Shuichi's waist and the taller man brought the smaller one closer to him.

Shuichi looked up at his lover as he thought, 'Is this a dream or not?'

---

I'm SO sorry for the long wait! My computer has been so messed up! But there is your update and I'm working on the next! Leave reviews!

Thanks!

-Reiven a.k.a Ryoko