Shine On Me

AN: Here's my first A Walk To Remember fic. It's a short one because I felt I wanted to focus entirely on certain things. So here you go! Reviews are very much appreciated.

Disclaimer: I don't own A Walk To Remember, but only my imagination.

Here is my thought
This is my plea
Lord let your holy light shine on me
I wonder will you

Hear my prayer
I know I'm not worthy, but I need your help
Lord shine your light
Shine it this way

Shine it so I can see which way to take
My faith is in you

To bring me through
I have one question...

I have gone through that song a thousand times like a broken record since Jamie slipped away. It was the first time she caught my eye and truly captivated me. The way she moved, how her confidence radiated, how she sounded...

Whenever Jamie opened her mouth, words of deep meaning and sheer bliss floated out of those sweet lips and held me prisoner. The sounds were all different but somehow the same. They moved me in a way I had never felt before Jamie and her faith, and yet they still hold all of me.

That is why I still look for a meaning to this song. A reason why she chose to sing that song to me so I could become her prisoner. It holds so many different meanings.

My first idea was that she was a pathetic nerd with a silly little crush. I mean, I couldn't ruin my reputation by actually giving into her lullaby and risk social suicide. So I continued to look uncomfortable but keep an ear open for her precious voice. The voice that kept me going when I was a pathetic rebel that had nothing better to do than ruin Clay Gephardt's teenage life.

Of course her gaze lingered, soaking up all of me. And later on when we slowly became closer, did I realise that her gaze still lingered and her faith was in me. And that the song she sang was no coincidence, but it was made for me.

When I found out that Jamie had leukaemia, the world stood still and everything just felt wrong. I no longer thought about myself, but about Jamie and how she felt. I prayed for her every night and hoped that she would live or at least die a happy and peaceful death.

And my prayer was answered; she did. She died with loving faces surrounding her and God looking down at her calling to her with his peaceful voice. That night, I saw a shooting star and I knew that was Jamie's pathway to heaven with her mother.

I always wondered whether she found peace. Did she now sing to God on his golden throne? Did she indulge other people in her faith and blissful ways? But most of all, did she get her miracle? Was it to go up to heaven?

So I went to find my answer. I went to Reverend Sullivan, Jamie's father, so I could get my peace and answer so I could move onto things that Jamie would have liked me to do.

"I'm sorry she never got her miracle."

"She did... It was you."

And that was when I found my light. My light in the darkness that had began to surround me. But when I was driving back to my flat, one song filled my head.

The song that Jamie had first sang to me. And one line made me think:

I know I'm not worthy, but I need your help...

That was Jamie's silent plea. It wasn't to God, but to me. She wanted me to become her miracle so that she could feel love before she made her way up to heaven. She wanted me to hear her prayer and shine my light on her so that she could show me the wonder's of this world. Wonder. Beauty. Love. Joy. Things that I had never experienced in my meaningless life, and now here was my silver angel giving me all these things so I could have faith.

So that is why I am now at peace. Why I now look at Jamie's picture and feel all those things and no longer feel sad, but happy. And when my precious daughter, Jessica, reaches a certain age, I will teach her all about faith and how you should never judge a person on their looks, but by what they teach you.