Hey everyone! I'm sorry for taking so long in the update! I was on vacation
with no computer. Also I noticed that I have not been writing notes in the
beginning of the chapters, and I apologize. I would first like to thank
everyone who sent reviews! They are extremely appreciated. I enjoy reading
the praise and the criticism, as long as it's tasteful. Also this chapter
may seem a little dull to you, and I apologize, but I think that it is for
informational purposes, or "revelations." Chapter 5 will continue on with
the unraveling plot, and I assure you that they are many twists and turns
ahead, so enjoy reading and continue your journey into lust and deception.
RATED: R FOR ADULT SITUATION AND LANUAGE
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SAILORMOON BUT THE STORYLINE AND ALL ADDITIONAL ORIGINAL CHARACTERS BELONG TO ME
Usagi let out a low, raspy moan that emerged from the back of her throat, as she gripped Endymion's wide, firm shoulders. She tossed her blonde hair, some of which was stuck to her forehead from sweat, as another orgasm gripped her. She kissed Endymion's arm, which was by her head and supporting Endymion's weight, lightly after she came back down. She studied Endymion's face as he gazed intently at her, his breath was coming in short, labored gasps. She opened her mouth, to call out his name, in an attempt to increase the intimacy and personalize their fucking, but all that came out from her swollen lips was a series of small moans. The reference was completely correct; fucking was what it could most accurately be referred to. They were both satisfying their carnal instincts, as Endymion continued to pump in and out of her small frame. Her chest tightened as her creamy legs did the same around his waist. Could this feeling that stirred in her bosom be love? Of course not. It was not the feeling she got when she was with Ryan. Oh yes, she was in love with Ryan, but right now she was feeling incredible lust for the man that was at this moment, a part of her. And in the battle between the heart and the body, the body had emerged victorious, as it would inexorably be again. She continued to analyze his handsome features, his stormy blue eyes. She could decipher lust and sexual pleasure, but of course they were a given. To her surprise she also noticed that his sapphire eyes contained no remorse or regret, but instead, a surprising look of determination and triumph, as though he completed a mission. However, her surprise was subtle and short lived, for she knew those same emotions was reflected in her face as well. She had triumphed over Ryan, somewhere he was sleeping alone in a cold bed, while she had some of the best sex of her life. She also felt no remorse. She was certain that given the opportunity, she would once again be in Endymion's arms, once again coaxed into his bed. Endymion gave her weak smile as she neared closer to another orgasm. She could no longer count how many she had experienced; they all seemed to have run together. She did know, however, that Endymion put as much discipline and control in his sex as he did to his violin. She felt his muscles tightening as their sweat- slicked bodies continued to move together. She ran her slender fingers through his thick ebony hair, and he let out a strangled moan as he reached his peak, and as she arched up to him, once again reaching hers. Usagi turned her head, to gaze at the face of the man that was now completely on top of her, his chest moving up and down quickly. A seductive smile played on her lips, as she asked in a husky whisper, "Now, who's Ryan's good girl." She gasped as the form on top her turned and she was faced with the delicate features of a handsome man with emerald eyes and dark-blonde hair.
"Now you're my little dirty girl," Ryan breathed.
Usagi shot up in bed with a start, her chest heaving. She ran her hand through her sweat-soaked bangs, as she tried to regain control of her breathing. Her hands searched the blankets around her for some sign that another individual had been indeed in bed with her, but the sheets were unruffled and cool to the touch. Definitely not signs that there had been an old-fashioned romp in this very bed. She looked down and also discovered she was still clothed in the rather revealing nightgown she had adorned for Endymion's viewing pleasure. Usagi placed a hand to her head as she recalled falling asleep in her bed, waiting for Endymion to arrive. "I'm seriously overworked," she sighed to herself. She glanced around the room, and noticed the steady blink of the red light on her answering machine. She reached for the play button with a shaky hand, afraid that it was once again Ryan. "I was sleeping," her voice quivered her explanation to the empty room. To her surprise, it was Endymion's voice that drifted from the answering machine. "Hey, Usa, um Usagi, I just can't-- make it over there tonight, yeah I have to--practice my violin, yes, my violin, big concert soon. Well I think we should, it would be better... *pause*... damn it. Just umm.. Give me a call. I guess, maybe I'll see you tomorrow," came Endymion's stuttering message. A slight smile tugged at her lips, as she thought about the message. Endymion sounded like a virgin schoolboy, talking to a girl for the first time, but as she replayed the message, it became more distinct to her that it sounded like Endymion was having an internal conflict. She shrugged it off, however. "He probably didn't come because I don't satisfy his soul," she said out loud mockingly. Inside she was slightly disappointed, but more relieved that she did not complicate her life by sleeping with a man that was quickly becoming one of her close friends. She looked at her digital alarm clock which flashed 5 o'clock. "I wonder what made him change his mind," she pondered out loud as she twisted her hair and headed to the bathroom in an attempt to start the day, and find some release from the predicament her steamy dream and left her in.
Endymion slowly awoke, groggily pulling the heavy covers off. He managed to pull himself to an upright position, rather stiffly, due to the fact that he had fallen asleep still in the attire he had planned to wear to Usagi's.
"Grr, Usagi," he growled angrily, as all the problems from the night before hit him like a freight train. He placed his heavy head into his palms as he tried to remember what exactly had happened the previous evening.
*FLASHBACK* "All right, I'm coming right over," he whispered gruffly into the receiver before replacing it on its cradle. Endymion quickly ran into his bedroom to change into something more suitable. He slid into the bathroom, and came into a halt in front of his medicine cabinet. "This is it, after this, you can forget everything, this nightmare will finally be fucking over," he assured himself as he applied a slight amount of cologne. He grabbed his keys from the coffee table, and pulled his front door open, but to his surprise, someone was already standing there. "Motoki, what the hell are you doing here?" Endymion demanded of the tall blonde man that now blocked his path to Usagi's bed. "I have to tell you something," Motoki replied as he pushed his way into Endymion's apartment. "I don't know where you got this bullshit story about your aunt's death from, but it ain't true," he continued. "I don't have time for this shit," Endymion breathed impatiently. "Well make time," Motoki bit back. "Okay, what the hell are you talking about?" he shouted. "I know you say that your uncle was totally pissed, but I don't think he disowned you that much that he wouldn't even tell you that your own aunt died," Motoki explained. "I'm listening," Endymion replied, interest creeping into his voice. "So I decided to do a little research. I know where your aunt and uncle live because, you know we kind of grew up together. Anyway, your aunt AND uncle died two years ago, in a car crash," Motoki finished softly. Endymion gulped and looked away. "I'm real sorry man, but I think it's better this way. At least you know that your Uncle doesn't hate you. I also found in the town's records that they're buried side by side. I got the name of the cemetery, just in case you wanted to pay your final respects," Motoki added, handing him a piece of paper. "Thank you man, God I missed you," Endymion choked out as he gave Motoki a hug. "Take care of yourself now, get some rest. I'll call you tomorrow after I get off work. It will be just like old times," Motoki said, giving Endymion a slap on the back. "Yeah, just like old times," Endymion replied softly with a smile as he led Motoki to the front door.
Endymion let out a long sigh as he closed to door after Motoki. He felt more relieved than saddened by his relatives' death since they've been dead to him for many years. He was just happy that they were finally delivered from their suffering. "I least I know my Aunt has a final resting place," he shared with the empty apartment. But that thought brought his mind crashing back to Usagi, who at this very moment was probably waiting for him to give her a nice, good romp. "Oh God," he panicked, slapping his hand against his forehead. He was not going to deny that he wanted her, any straight man would, but if he screwed her then what would Ryan do to her. He stumbled over to the phone and quickly dialed Usagi number, dialing the wrong number twice in his haste. He left a bumbling message on her answer machine, deciding that he would think about his dilemma in the morning, but that having sex with her would definitely not help his situation. "I just need to not think," Endymion whispered as he raced over to the refrigerator, searching it frantically for anything with some alcoholic content. "Damn it," he cursed his strict self-discipline of not drinking, after.. "I told myself I'm NOT going to think tonight," he scolded, as he settled for a Vanilla Coke instead. Unfortunately his mind was choosing to ignore him and decided to generate thoughts anyways. Thoughts that drifted to Usagi, and eventually Ryan. He reached for his cordless phone, got half-way through dialing Ryan's cell phone number, then thought better of it and hung up. Endymion knew Ryan was a ruthless business man and could destroy him. But he was less concerned about what Ryan would do to him than what he would do to Usagi. "What would happen if I just told Ryan I wasn't going to do his dirty work anymore, and he could just shove his lies and deals up his ass?" he pondered, but the answer to his question popped into his mind unpleasantly. Endymion knew exactly what Ryan would do. He would hire some other man, who would bang Usagi in an instant. Then... Endymion shuddered to think what Ryan would do to Usagi then. "No, I can't tell Ryan I won't do it," he continued his thought process out loud. Also an emotion that felt suspiciously like jealously burned in his chest at the thought of another man touching Usagi, but he quickly pushed it aside. Endymion thought hard for a few moments before it came to him. "When Ryan gets back, I'll just tell him that Usagi was a perfectly faithful wife, no lies, no nothing. He'll probably drop this idiotic notion then. All I've got to do is not have sex with Usagi," he said aloud happily, revealing his findings to the uncaring room. Now, with his conscience as clear as it had been in a long time, he fell exhausted into bed.
*END FLASHBACK*
Endymion ran his hand through his thick, dark hair, begrudgingly leaving the warmness of his bed. He glanced at his alarm clock which read 5:30. He wondered if Usagi would be embarrassed of her rebuffed attempts, or if she would come on even stronger. Maybe, everything would just go back like it used to be, just a friendly relationship. Endymion let out a cynical laugh. Nothing ever went back to how it used to be. And he was sure that Usagi had called him for the purposes of sex, he could tell by the aching desire present in her voice. "Only time will tell," he whispered softly, heading toward the shower; however, he was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. "Damn it, Motoki," he swore angrily as he threw his sweatpants back on and headed toward the door. "Motoki, what is it, I was about-" Endymion stopped in mid-sentence however for it was not Motoki at his door. "Usagi it's five-thirty in the morning!" he exclaimed. "Well I woke-up early and I wanted to talk," she said sheepishly. "Come on in," he sighed.
Usagi instinctively made her way to the balcony. She found it very peaceful to stare at the still dark sky and sleeping Tokyo below. "So what's on your mind?" Endymion asked casually as he settled next to her, leaning against the railing. "Us," she replied softly. "What about us," he asked, suspicion creeping into his voice. "Everything, especially last night. I'll be honest with you. I called you because I wanted sex. There, I told you the truth, now be honest with me, did you want it?" she demanded. Endymion gazed into her cerulean eyes that held so much understanding, but still so many questions. "Yes, I wanted you," he replied hoarsely. "What made you change your mind?" she pressed. He looked away. "Endymion, what made you change your mind?" she demanded more firmly. Still no answer. "God damn it Endymion, would it be so bad to let someone in?" Usagi cried. "It was Motoki. God it was everything, just everything that happened." he answered exasperated. "What happened? Tell me everything, about Monique, about your Aunt and Uncle, let me help you!" she shouted. "You wouldn't understand, you'd hate me! You can't help, no one can," he spoke swiftly, with an air of confusion. "Look at me Endymion," she said, turning his face to hers. "I used to be a fun-loving, happy-go-lucky girl. Then I met Ryan, and I become a cold, dull, machine. Everything Ryan said, I obeyed. Last night I talked back to him, I rebuked him over the phone. I defied him by calling you! I disobeyed him by being your friend because I wanted to do it! And it felt good! Also this morning, I sang in the shower, and walked around the house nude, because that's what I wanted to do! It's me! Endymion, it's because of you I'm becoming the girl I used to be, the girl I love. Jesus Endymion, please. Let me do the same for you," she begged. Endymion stared into the dark, early-morning sky. Usagi's heavy breathing, caused by her ranting, was all that could be heard.
"It started in my freshman year of high school, back in Italy," he began. "I was in the music room, it was after school, and I was practicing my violin, the one thing my mother left me after she died in the car accident. I knew I was going to become the best; people everywhere would adore my music as much as I adored making it. So I practiced diligently everyday. It was, perhaps around February, when she came in to see me. She said she heard my playing, thought it was beautiful. I thought she was beautiful. She had long blonde hair that went to the middle of her back and bright blue eyes. She swayed over to me in her impossibly low-hanging jeans and told me she came here to get away from her boyfriend. He was acting like a big jerk, she said. Anyway, after a few minutes I realized who she was. Her name was Gianna, miss perfect. Smart, popular, wealthy, athletic, and her boyfriend was mister perfect himself, captain of the lacrosse team. So I was thinking what the hell is this girl, a senior no less, doing with me, a freshman. I wasn't bad-looking, kinda scrawny, but still not in her league. She asked me to play for her, said it made her relax. Well, everyday she came back after school to listen to me play."
He took a deep breath.
"One day, it was March 18; actually, after I had finished playing, she told me she was going to show me how I made her feel when I played. I remember she lifted her teeny shirt above her head, and we did it, right in the music room. She was my first. And God, everyday she came back, and we did it every time. I completely forgot about practicing, after school became a fuck-fest. That's the only time I saw her, I didn't know she was still dating her boyfriend in the life she had outside the music room. During this time she must have regaled all her friends with our escapades and one of her friends took a liking to my best friend, Motoki. Motoki and I grew up together; he lived across the street from my Aunt and Uncle's. Anyhow, it was this busty chick; I think her name was Nina. She had dark red curly hair, real pretty. Of course, Motoki absolutely adored her, worshipped the ground she walked on. One day, it was late May, because I remember it was a week before graduation. Gianna came in to the music room as always, and I was all ready for another go, as usual. However, this time was different. She brandished her left-hand in front of me which adorned a diamond ring. Supposedly, mister popularity had asked her to marry him, and of course she agreed. She told me that she had no time for little boys anymore. I was just a fun-fuck, a little toy that she had now grown out of. She told me it could have never worked. I was to naive, a little boy who she had tried to make into a man, but I was an obviously failed attempt. That was two major blows, but the most hard-hitting was about to come. She told me she was pregnant, but of course she wasn't keeping the bastard. That's exactly what she called our child, just a bastard. I pleaded with her not to kill our baby, I told her that I didn't need to finish high school; I could play the violin for money, while she finished school, and we'd get by. I always loved children; I couldn't imagine just getting rid of one because of inconvenience. Every night I wonder if right now I would be tucking in a boy or girl, who'd whisper, "I love you Daddy."
Endymion wiped furiously at his eyes before he continued.
"So she left, saying good luck with your violin, something to that effect. I was so upset, I wasn't thinking straight. That evening, I stole the keys to my Aunt's new SUV, she had just brought it. I knew there was a place that people underage could get plastered. I just had to escape. I stayed there for about two hours, drinking anything I could get my hands on. By the time I got into the SUV to get home, I couldn't even walk straight. I was driving home down Main Street; I knew I was going too fast. Supposedly, Gianna, her boyfriend, Nina, Andrew, and Gianna's cousin Monique went out on Main Street that night to celebrate Gianna's engagement. Everything after this, Motoki will have a different version for, something about how it was all Monique's fault but that's a load of bull. Gianna just darted out into the road, I couldn't stop in time and-and I hit her. Oh God, I still wake up to the sound of her body slamming into the windshield, shattering it to a million pieces. She died, that night, lying on the cold pavement."
He was silent for a few moments as he concentrated on the cold concrete beneath his feet. Usagi did not disturb his reverie, even trying not to breathe.
"So of course I went to court. God, there were so many charges. Driving without a license, underage driving, driving under the influence, underage drinking, and manslaughter. Her boyfriend was devastated; all he did was weep so they couldn't put him on the stand. Motoki knew something about Monique, something about the accident, but Gianna's parents wouldn't let Motoki testify. Monique lived with them, and they didn't want their good name smudged. Nina and Gianna's parents must have discussed their story beforehand, but I'll never forget when Nina took the stand. She told the court that even though I was drunk, I had every intention of killing Gianna. She said that Gianna told me she was pregnant. Nina said that Gianna had had sex with me only once, and she was seventeen when the incident happened between us, and that it was a foolish mistake. Nina said that when Gianna told me she was keeping the baby, I couldn't handle it. Also she told the court I was madly in love with Gianna, and couldn't take the rejection of her marrying Marco (that was her boyfriend's name). Nina said that I went mad with rage, and I needed a way to get rid of Gianna, get rid of my problems. She said the opportunity of Gianna crossing the road seemed too great to pass up, so I purposely ran her over. I got up and I screamed every name I could think of at her. Not a good thing to do. I could never hold my tongue. However, Monique did testify, even though she wasn't a match for Nina, who was almost as angelic and beloved as Gianna. Monique, as you suggested, was lovely in my opinion. She had dark black hair that curled below her chin, and deep brown eyes that seemed to capture you. Also she had the most beautiful pale skin, and ruby lips. However, she had no father to speak of, she was the product of one night stand her mother had. She lived with her Aunt because her mother was in rehab, and Monique seemed to be following in her mother's footsteps. She hopped up on the stand, in her tight black tang-top and baggy black pants. And told her side of the story. Monique said that she thought Gianna was a whore, and that there was no way to prove the baby was mine. She said that it could be any guy's that was in this courtroom. She also said that she thought I was completely stable, and that Nina and her Aunt had made up that bullshit story to save perfect-little-Gianna's reputation. Obviously the rebel artist's testimony didn't hold up well against Nina and the public opinion of Gianna. It meant a lot to me though, especially since I really needed Motoki, but he wasn't there. I tried to talk to him before the trial; I thought that he'd support me. Instead he just looked away as if he didn't hear me. I later learned that Nina had forbid him to talk to me. After all we've been through, we grew up together, and it was even because of me Nina had given him the time of day. He betrayed me because of a little whore, but he was sooo in love. They broke up a few weeks later. I hope it was worth it to him."
Endymion let out a slightly cynical laugh, and a rather ugly smirk appeared on his face as he stared out at sleeping Tokyo. He shook his head and continued.
"I got a slight break however. Gianna's family was not as perfect as they seemed. Her father had gambling debts that left them in major financial trouble. They agreed to not press for jail time if they could get a large compensation. My poor Aunt couldn't bear to see my go to jail so she convinced my Uncle to agree, even though I had totaled her SUV. So I managed to skip jail time, but my relatives were left with extreme debt, especially because they didn't have much money to begin with. I couldn't stand being around them. They said they didn't hold anything against me, that people make mistakes, but I knew that they blamed me. So I decided to leave, and follow the path I would have taken if Gianna and I were together and had had the baby. I left with only my violin and ten dollars in my pocket."
"While I was waiting at the bus stop I ran into Monique. She said she just liked to hang there. Whatever. I told her what I was planning to do since the whole fucking town and my aunt and uncle despised me. To my surprise, she asked if she could come along. Monique told me that after what she had said about precious Gianna on the stand, her Aunt and Uncle were throwing her out of the house and the town hated her too. So we traveled around Italy, she knew a lot of places where we could stop and stay, and she knew a lot of people like us. People who were trying to run away from their past. Finally, we got a nice little apartment. We made rent by the money I got playing the violin at odd gigs, and she sold some of her paintings. Rather romantic, right? We ended up having a physical relationship, even though she was older than me. I loved her so much. However, I came home one day, after trying unsuccessfully to join an orchestra, they said that I was too young, and I found her screwing a guy, in our bed. I was so angry I stormed out, but she followed me with only a bed sheet wrapped around her. I'll never forget the sentence she told me after she managed to get me to listen. She said: "How the hell do you think we've been getting money to make the rent." I never forgave myself for making her succumb to selling her body for me. The next day I was determined to give the girl I loved a good life. That's when I meant Malachite. He said I had talent and that he could work with me. He got me good gigs, and everything was going great until I came home and found a rose on the bed along with a letter. They were from Monique. The letter read that Malachite and she were going to Paris because he was going to make her a famous artist. It said that she needed a man like Malachite, not a boy. Someone who could provide for her, so she would never have to do what she did for me. It also said that she had tried to make me man, but she guessed she failed. I left Italy, and went to America, where I made it pretty big on my own. I never made amends with anyone from my past, and now it's too late for my apologizes to my aunt and uncle, they're fucking dead. And I'm still just a scared little boy, still running, instead of facing my problems like a man," Endymion finished, disgust dripping from his voice.
Usagi stared at him for a few moments letting it all soak in. "God, Endymion," she whispered, "I had no idea." "Yeah, well now you do. I suppose you're now going to try to discreetly slip out of the apartment, away from the homicidal maniac," he replied harshly. Usagi had to suppress a smile, Rei's past warning echoing in her head. "Endymion, I don't blame you for what you did. Everybody makes mistakes. And I can't imagine anyone ever wanting to get rid of something as precious as a baby," she said softly, absent-mindedly running a hand over her barren stomach. "So.. You don't hate me," Endymion choked out. In response, Usagi wrapped her arms around him. Endymion rested his chin upon her shoulder, and she felt his warm tears land on her silk blouse as the first rays of sun broke through the dark morning sky, signaling a new day.
Well I hope this chapter cleared up a few questions about Endymion's
past! Also please review, review, review! As before mentioned in my
note at the beginning of this chapter, chapter 5 will focus entirely
on the present, and the romance and temptation that is my story!
RATED: R FOR ADULT SITUATION AND LANUAGE
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SAILORMOON BUT THE STORYLINE AND ALL ADDITIONAL ORIGINAL CHARACTERS BELONG TO ME
Usagi let out a low, raspy moan that emerged from the back of her throat, as she gripped Endymion's wide, firm shoulders. She tossed her blonde hair, some of which was stuck to her forehead from sweat, as another orgasm gripped her. She kissed Endymion's arm, which was by her head and supporting Endymion's weight, lightly after she came back down. She studied Endymion's face as he gazed intently at her, his breath was coming in short, labored gasps. She opened her mouth, to call out his name, in an attempt to increase the intimacy and personalize their fucking, but all that came out from her swollen lips was a series of small moans. The reference was completely correct; fucking was what it could most accurately be referred to. They were both satisfying their carnal instincts, as Endymion continued to pump in and out of her small frame. Her chest tightened as her creamy legs did the same around his waist. Could this feeling that stirred in her bosom be love? Of course not. It was not the feeling she got when she was with Ryan. Oh yes, she was in love with Ryan, but right now she was feeling incredible lust for the man that was at this moment, a part of her. And in the battle between the heart and the body, the body had emerged victorious, as it would inexorably be again. She continued to analyze his handsome features, his stormy blue eyes. She could decipher lust and sexual pleasure, but of course they were a given. To her surprise she also noticed that his sapphire eyes contained no remorse or regret, but instead, a surprising look of determination and triumph, as though he completed a mission. However, her surprise was subtle and short lived, for she knew those same emotions was reflected in her face as well. She had triumphed over Ryan, somewhere he was sleeping alone in a cold bed, while she had some of the best sex of her life. She also felt no remorse. She was certain that given the opportunity, she would once again be in Endymion's arms, once again coaxed into his bed. Endymion gave her weak smile as she neared closer to another orgasm. She could no longer count how many she had experienced; they all seemed to have run together. She did know, however, that Endymion put as much discipline and control in his sex as he did to his violin. She felt his muscles tightening as their sweat- slicked bodies continued to move together. She ran her slender fingers through his thick ebony hair, and he let out a strangled moan as he reached his peak, and as she arched up to him, once again reaching hers. Usagi turned her head, to gaze at the face of the man that was now completely on top of her, his chest moving up and down quickly. A seductive smile played on her lips, as she asked in a husky whisper, "Now, who's Ryan's good girl." She gasped as the form on top her turned and she was faced with the delicate features of a handsome man with emerald eyes and dark-blonde hair.
"Now you're my little dirty girl," Ryan breathed.
Usagi shot up in bed with a start, her chest heaving. She ran her hand through her sweat-soaked bangs, as she tried to regain control of her breathing. Her hands searched the blankets around her for some sign that another individual had been indeed in bed with her, but the sheets were unruffled and cool to the touch. Definitely not signs that there had been an old-fashioned romp in this very bed. She looked down and also discovered she was still clothed in the rather revealing nightgown she had adorned for Endymion's viewing pleasure. Usagi placed a hand to her head as she recalled falling asleep in her bed, waiting for Endymion to arrive. "I'm seriously overworked," she sighed to herself. She glanced around the room, and noticed the steady blink of the red light on her answering machine. She reached for the play button with a shaky hand, afraid that it was once again Ryan. "I was sleeping," her voice quivered her explanation to the empty room. To her surprise, it was Endymion's voice that drifted from the answering machine. "Hey, Usa, um Usagi, I just can't-- make it over there tonight, yeah I have to--practice my violin, yes, my violin, big concert soon. Well I think we should, it would be better... *pause*... damn it. Just umm.. Give me a call. I guess, maybe I'll see you tomorrow," came Endymion's stuttering message. A slight smile tugged at her lips, as she thought about the message. Endymion sounded like a virgin schoolboy, talking to a girl for the first time, but as she replayed the message, it became more distinct to her that it sounded like Endymion was having an internal conflict. She shrugged it off, however. "He probably didn't come because I don't satisfy his soul," she said out loud mockingly. Inside she was slightly disappointed, but more relieved that she did not complicate her life by sleeping with a man that was quickly becoming one of her close friends. She looked at her digital alarm clock which flashed 5 o'clock. "I wonder what made him change his mind," she pondered out loud as she twisted her hair and headed to the bathroom in an attempt to start the day, and find some release from the predicament her steamy dream and left her in.
Endymion slowly awoke, groggily pulling the heavy covers off. He managed to pull himself to an upright position, rather stiffly, due to the fact that he had fallen asleep still in the attire he had planned to wear to Usagi's.
"Grr, Usagi," he growled angrily, as all the problems from the night before hit him like a freight train. He placed his heavy head into his palms as he tried to remember what exactly had happened the previous evening.
*FLASHBACK* "All right, I'm coming right over," he whispered gruffly into the receiver before replacing it on its cradle. Endymion quickly ran into his bedroom to change into something more suitable. He slid into the bathroom, and came into a halt in front of his medicine cabinet. "This is it, after this, you can forget everything, this nightmare will finally be fucking over," he assured himself as he applied a slight amount of cologne. He grabbed his keys from the coffee table, and pulled his front door open, but to his surprise, someone was already standing there. "Motoki, what the hell are you doing here?" Endymion demanded of the tall blonde man that now blocked his path to Usagi's bed. "I have to tell you something," Motoki replied as he pushed his way into Endymion's apartment. "I don't know where you got this bullshit story about your aunt's death from, but it ain't true," he continued. "I don't have time for this shit," Endymion breathed impatiently. "Well make time," Motoki bit back. "Okay, what the hell are you talking about?" he shouted. "I know you say that your uncle was totally pissed, but I don't think he disowned you that much that he wouldn't even tell you that your own aunt died," Motoki explained. "I'm listening," Endymion replied, interest creeping into his voice. "So I decided to do a little research. I know where your aunt and uncle live because, you know we kind of grew up together. Anyway, your aunt AND uncle died two years ago, in a car crash," Motoki finished softly. Endymion gulped and looked away. "I'm real sorry man, but I think it's better this way. At least you know that your Uncle doesn't hate you. I also found in the town's records that they're buried side by side. I got the name of the cemetery, just in case you wanted to pay your final respects," Motoki added, handing him a piece of paper. "Thank you man, God I missed you," Endymion choked out as he gave Motoki a hug. "Take care of yourself now, get some rest. I'll call you tomorrow after I get off work. It will be just like old times," Motoki said, giving Endymion a slap on the back. "Yeah, just like old times," Endymion replied softly with a smile as he led Motoki to the front door.
Endymion let out a long sigh as he closed to door after Motoki. He felt more relieved than saddened by his relatives' death since they've been dead to him for many years. He was just happy that they were finally delivered from their suffering. "I least I know my Aunt has a final resting place," he shared with the empty apartment. But that thought brought his mind crashing back to Usagi, who at this very moment was probably waiting for him to give her a nice, good romp. "Oh God," he panicked, slapping his hand against his forehead. He was not going to deny that he wanted her, any straight man would, but if he screwed her then what would Ryan do to her. He stumbled over to the phone and quickly dialed Usagi number, dialing the wrong number twice in his haste. He left a bumbling message on her answer machine, deciding that he would think about his dilemma in the morning, but that having sex with her would definitely not help his situation. "I just need to not think," Endymion whispered as he raced over to the refrigerator, searching it frantically for anything with some alcoholic content. "Damn it," he cursed his strict self-discipline of not drinking, after.. "I told myself I'm NOT going to think tonight," he scolded, as he settled for a Vanilla Coke instead. Unfortunately his mind was choosing to ignore him and decided to generate thoughts anyways. Thoughts that drifted to Usagi, and eventually Ryan. He reached for his cordless phone, got half-way through dialing Ryan's cell phone number, then thought better of it and hung up. Endymion knew Ryan was a ruthless business man and could destroy him. But he was less concerned about what Ryan would do to him than what he would do to Usagi. "What would happen if I just told Ryan I wasn't going to do his dirty work anymore, and he could just shove his lies and deals up his ass?" he pondered, but the answer to his question popped into his mind unpleasantly. Endymion knew exactly what Ryan would do. He would hire some other man, who would bang Usagi in an instant. Then... Endymion shuddered to think what Ryan would do to Usagi then. "No, I can't tell Ryan I won't do it," he continued his thought process out loud. Also an emotion that felt suspiciously like jealously burned in his chest at the thought of another man touching Usagi, but he quickly pushed it aside. Endymion thought hard for a few moments before it came to him. "When Ryan gets back, I'll just tell him that Usagi was a perfectly faithful wife, no lies, no nothing. He'll probably drop this idiotic notion then. All I've got to do is not have sex with Usagi," he said aloud happily, revealing his findings to the uncaring room. Now, with his conscience as clear as it had been in a long time, he fell exhausted into bed.
*END FLASHBACK*
Endymion ran his hand through his thick, dark hair, begrudgingly leaving the warmness of his bed. He glanced at his alarm clock which read 5:30. He wondered if Usagi would be embarrassed of her rebuffed attempts, or if she would come on even stronger. Maybe, everything would just go back like it used to be, just a friendly relationship. Endymion let out a cynical laugh. Nothing ever went back to how it used to be. And he was sure that Usagi had called him for the purposes of sex, he could tell by the aching desire present in her voice. "Only time will tell," he whispered softly, heading toward the shower; however, he was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. "Damn it, Motoki," he swore angrily as he threw his sweatpants back on and headed toward the door. "Motoki, what is it, I was about-" Endymion stopped in mid-sentence however for it was not Motoki at his door. "Usagi it's five-thirty in the morning!" he exclaimed. "Well I woke-up early and I wanted to talk," she said sheepishly. "Come on in," he sighed.
Usagi instinctively made her way to the balcony. She found it very peaceful to stare at the still dark sky and sleeping Tokyo below. "So what's on your mind?" Endymion asked casually as he settled next to her, leaning against the railing. "Us," she replied softly. "What about us," he asked, suspicion creeping into his voice. "Everything, especially last night. I'll be honest with you. I called you because I wanted sex. There, I told you the truth, now be honest with me, did you want it?" she demanded. Endymion gazed into her cerulean eyes that held so much understanding, but still so many questions. "Yes, I wanted you," he replied hoarsely. "What made you change your mind?" she pressed. He looked away. "Endymion, what made you change your mind?" she demanded more firmly. Still no answer. "God damn it Endymion, would it be so bad to let someone in?" Usagi cried. "It was Motoki. God it was everything, just everything that happened." he answered exasperated. "What happened? Tell me everything, about Monique, about your Aunt and Uncle, let me help you!" she shouted. "You wouldn't understand, you'd hate me! You can't help, no one can," he spoke swiftly, with an air of confusion. "Look at me Endymion," she said, turning his face to hers. "I used to be a fun-loving, happy-go-lucky girl. Then I met Ryan, and I become a cold, dull, machine. Everything Ryan said, I obeyed. Last night I talked back to him, I rebuked him over the phone. I defied him by calling you! I disobeyed him by being your friend because I wanted to do it! And it felt good! Also this morning, I sang in the shower, and walked around the house nude, because that's what I wanted to do! It's me! Endymion, it's because of you I'm becoming the girl I used to be, the girl I love. Jesus Endymion, please. Let me do the same for you," she begged. Endymion stared into the dark, early-morning sky. Usagi's heavy breathing, caused by her ranting, was all that could be heard.
"It started in my freshman year of high school, back in Italy," he began. "I was in the music room, it was after school, and I was practicing my violin, the one thing my mother left me after she died in the car accident. I knew I was going to become the best; people everywhere would adore my music as much as I adored making it. So I practiced diligently everyday. It was, perhaps around February, when she came in to see me. She said she heard my playing, thought it was beautiful. I thought she was beautiful. She had long blonde hair that went to the middle of her back and bright blue eyes. She swayed over to me in her impossibly low-hanging jeans and told me she came here to get away from her boyfriend. He was acting like a big jerk, she said. Anyway, after a few minutes I realized who she was. Her name was Gianna, miss perfect. Smart, popular, wealthy, athletic, and her boyfriend was mister perfect himself, captain of the lacrosse team. So I was thinking what the hell is this girl, a senior no less, doing with me, a freshman. I wasn't bad-looking, kinda scrawny, but still not in her league. She asked me to play for her, said it made her relax. Well, everyday she came back after school to listen to me play."
He took a deep breath.
"One day, it was March 18; actually, after I had finished playing, she told me she was going to show me how I made her feel when I played. I remember she lifted her teeny shirt above her head, and we did it, right in the music room. She was my first. And God, everyday she came back, and we did it every time. I completely forgot about practicing, after school became a fuck-fest. That's the only time I saw her, I didn't know she was still dating her boyfriend in the life she had outside the music room. During this time she must have regaled all her friends with our escapades and one of her friends took a liking to my best friend, Motoki. Motoki and I grew up together; he lived across the street from my Aunt and Uncle's. Anyhow, it was this busty chick; I think her name was Nina. She had dark red curly hair, real pretty. Of course, Motoki absolutely adored her, worshipped the ground she walked on. One day, it was late May, because I remember it was a week before graduation. Gianna came in to the music room as always, and I was all ready for another go, as usual. However, this time was different. She brandished her left-hand in front of me which adorned a diamond ring. Supposedly, mister popularity had asked her to marry him, and of course she agreed. She told me that she had no time for little boys anymore. I was just a fun-fuck, a little toy that she had now grown out of. She told me it could have never worked. I was to naive, a little boy who she had tried to make into a man, but I was an obviously failed attempt. That was two major blows, but the most hard-hitting was about to come. She told me she was pregnant, but of course she wasn't keeping the bastard. That's exactly what she called our child, just a bastard. I pleaded with her not to kill our baby, I told her that I didn't need to finish high school; I could play the violin for money, while she finished school, and we'd get by. I always loved children; I couldn't imagine just getting rid of one because of inconvenience. Every night I wonder if right now I would be tucking in a boy or girl, who'd whisper, "I love you Daddy."
Endymion wiped furiously at his eyes before he continued.
"So she left, saying good luck with your violin, something to that effect. I was so upset, I wasn't thinking straight. That evening, I stole the keys to my Aunt's new SUV, she had just brought it. I knew there was a place that people underage could get plastered. I just had to escape. I stayed there for about two hours, drinking anything I could get my hands on. By the time I got into the SUV to get home, I couldn't even walk straight. I was driving home down Main Street; I knew I was going too fast. Supposedly, Gianna, her boyfriend, Nina, Andrew, and Gianna's cousin Monique went out on Main Street that night to celebrate Gianna's engagement. Everything after this, Motoki will have a different version for, something about how it was all Monique's fault but that's a load of bull. Gianna just darted out into the road, I couldn't stop in time and-and I hit her. Oh God, I still wake up to the sound of her body slamming into the windshield, shattering it to a million pieces. She died, that night, lying on the cold pavement."
He was silent for a few moments as he concentrated on the cold concrete beneath his feet. Usagi did not disturb his reverie, even trying not to breathe.
"So of course I went to court. God, there were so many charges. Driving without a license, underage driving, driving under the influence, underage drinking, and manslaughter. Her boyfriend was devastated; all he did was weep so they couldn't put him on the stand. Motoki knew something about Monique, something about the accident, but Gianna's parents wouldn't let Motoki testify. Monique lived with them, and they didn't want their good name smudged. Nina and Gianna's parents must have discussed their story beforehand, but I'll never forget when Nina took the stand. She told the court that even though I was drunk, I had every intention of killing Gianna. She said that Gianna told me she was pregnant. Nina said that Gianna had had sex with me only once, and she was seventeen when the incident happened between us, and that it was a foolish mistake. Nina said that when Gianna told me she was keeping the baby, I couldn't handle it. Also she told the court I was madly in love with Gianna, and couldn't take the rejection of her marrying Marco (that was her boyfriend's name). Nina said that I went mad with rage, and I needed a way to get rid of Gianna, get rid of my problems. She said the opportunity of Gianna crossing the road seemed too great to pass up, so I purposely ran her over. I got up and I screamed every name I could think of at her. Not a good thing to do. I could never hold my tongue. However, Monique did testify, even though she wasn't a match for Nina, who was almost as angelic and beloved as Gianna. Monique, as you suggested, was lovely in my opinion. She had dark black hair that curled below her chin, and deep brown eyes that seemed to capture you. Also she had the most beautiful pale skin, and ruby lips. However, she had no father to speak of, she was the product of one night stand her mother had. She lived with her Aunt because her mother was in rehab, and Monique seemed to be following in her mother's footsteps. She hopped up on the stand, in her tight black tang-top and baggy black pants. And told her side of the story. Monique said that she thought Gianna was a whore, and that there was no way to prove the baby was mine. She said that it could be any guy's that was in this courtroom. She also said that she thought I was completely stable, and that Nina and her Aunt had made up that bullshit story to save perfect-little-Gianna's reputation. Obviously the rebel artist's testimony didn't hold up well against Nina and the public opinion of Gianna. It meant a lot to me though, especially since I really needed Motoki, but he wasn't there. I tried to talk to him before the trial; I thought that he'd support me. Instead he just looked away as if he didn't hear me. I later learned that Nina had forbid him to talk to me. After all we've been through, we grew up together, and it was even because of me Nina had given him the time of day. He betrayed me because of a little whore, but he was sooo in love. They broke up a few weeks later. I hope it was worth it to him."
Endymion let out a slightly cynical laugh, and a rather ugly smirk appeared on his face as he stared out at sleeping Tokyo. He shook his head and continued.
"I got a slight break however. Gianna's family was not as perfect as they seemed. Her father had gambling debts that left them in major financial trouble. They agreed to not press for jail time if they could get a large compensation. My poor Aunt couldn't bear to see my go to jail so she convinced my Uncle to agree, even though I had totaled her SUV. So I managed to skip jail time, but my relatives were left with extreme debt, especially because they didn't have much money to begin with. I couldn't stand being around them. They said they didn't hold anything against me, that people make mistakes, but I knew that they blamed me. So I decided to leave, and follow the path I would have taken if Gianna and I were together and had had the baby. I left with only my violin and ten dollars in my pocket."
"While I was waiting at the bus stop I ran into Monique. She said she just liked to hang there. Whatever. I told her what I was planning to do since the whole fucking town and my aunt and uncle despised me. To my surprise, she asked if she could come along. Monique told me that after what she had said about precious Gianna on the stand, her Aunt and Uncle were throwing her out of the house and the town hated her too. So we traveled around Italy, she knew a lot of places where we could stop and stay, and she knew a lot of people like us. People who were trying to run away from their past. Finally, we got a nice little apartment. We made rent by the money I got playing the violin at odd gigs, and she sold some of her paintings. Rather romantic, right? We ended up having a physical relationship, even though she was older than me. I loved her so much. However, I came home one day, after trying unsuccessfully to join an orchestra, they said that I was too young, and I found her screwing a guy, in our bed. I was so angry I stormed out, but she followed me with only a bed sheet wrapped around her. I'll never forget the sentence she told me after she managed to get me to listen. She said: "How the hell do you think we've been getting money to make the rent." I never forgave myself for making her succumb to selling her body for me. The next day I was determined to give the girl I loved a good life. That's when I meant Malachite. He said I had talent and that he could work with me. He got me good gigs, and everything was going great until I came home and found a rose on the bed along with a letter. They were from Monique. The letter read that Malachite and she were going to Paris because he was going to make her a famous artist. It said that she needed a man like Malachite, not a boy. Someone who could provide for her, so she would never have to do what she did for me. It also said that she had tried to make me man, but she guessed she failed. I left Italy, and went to America, where I made it pretty big on my own. I never made amends with anyone from my past, and now it's too late for my apologizes to my aunt and uncle, they're fucking dead. And I'm still just a scared little boy, still running, instead of facing my problems like a man," Endymion finished, disgust dripping from his voice.
Usagi stared at him for a few moments letting it all soak in. "God, Endymion," she whispered, "I had no idea." "Yeah, well now you do. I suppose you're now going to try to discreetly slip out of the apartment, away from the homicidal maniac," he replied harshly. Usagi had to suppress a smile, Rei's past warning echoing in her head. "Endymion, I don't blame you for what you did. Everybody makes mistakes. And I can't imagine anyone ever wanting to get rid of something as precious as a baby," she said softly, absent-mindedly running a hand over her barren stomach. "So.. You don't hate me," Endymion choked out. In response, Usagi wrapped her arms around him. Endymion rested his chin upon her shoulder, and she felt his warm tears land on her silk blouse as the first rays of sun broke through the dark morning sky, signaling a new day.
Well I hope this chapter cleared up a few questions about Endymion's
past! Also please review, review, review! As before mentioned in my
note at the beginning of this chapter, chapter 5 will focus entirely
on the present, and the romance and temptation that is my story!