~*Summary: Buffy wakes up with Spike next to her and relives the memories
of her actions, the previous night. She wonders if she's in love with Spike
and deciding that can't be she leaves him to wake up alone. *~
~*Chapter 5: Is It Love?*~
"Mm"
Buffy sat up on the bed and stared around the room. "Where the hell am I?" she whispered. That was when she spotted the gorgeous vamp beside her. She tightly placed the blood red blanket across her chest.
~*~*~*~
[Memory]
"Spike" Buffy moaned.
"Slayer"
"Spike"
"I love you."
She placed a fierce kiss on the vampire's lips and tasted his mouth. She left his lips and stared into his eyes as he continued his movements.
"Oh God" she screamed.
~*~*~*~
[Buffy's Thoughts]
Why would I? ...Do I love him.Spike? No! No! I can't he's...I can't. He's everything I'm supposed to hate. Everything I stand against.
So what I stand against love? What sense does that make?
I can't. I just can't love him. No matter what he's done for me. He's wrong. I'm wrong.
~*~*~*~
Buffy sends one last glance to her one-time-lover and notices his arm wrapped protectively around her waist.
She carefully moves his arm and he grunts with disapproval.
She searches the floor for her garments and sends one last glance in Spike's direction before changing and leaving. ~*~*~*~
"Slayer, Slayer, open the door, Buffy!"
Willow answered the door looking as calmly as possible after what Buffy had told her happened.
"Spike, what are you doing here?"
"Out of the way, Red. Need to have a few words with the Slayer."
~*~*~*~
"Hey you didn't knock first protested Buffy as she remained looking at her magazine.
"We need to have a little chat, Slayer."
She looked up and saw the anger etched on his face. He was torn apart and clearly not n a state to be messed with.
"Spike"
"That's right, Spike. You know the vamp you shagged senseless three nights ago?"
"I don't want to talk about that now."
"Well I bloody well do. How do you think it feels Buffy? I looked for you and called your house and no one answered. You didn't get the bloody messages? You didn't even go out to patrol. I didn't want to come over here yelling the way I am to you so your friends could hear but you gave me no choice. How do you think it feels? Being left alone and treated like a one- night harlot?"
"It meant nothing, Spike."
"Oh it meant nothing? That's why you come over my crypt every night to sleep? That why you suddenly began to confide in me? That why you let me tell you I love you and for once you didn't kick me in the ass about it?"
"Just let go, Spike. It was good but it was only a one time thing it meant nothing."
"Who made you believe that? Did Xander or one of the Scoobs tell you that?"
"Just let me go!"
"I can't! I love you."
"No you don't."
"You think I haven't tried not too? You think I just welcomed these feelings with open arms? Let me tell you something. You welcomed me with more than open arms and that skimpy little outfit."
"Spike, please just go."
"No I admit it. You've had me by the shorthairs. I love you, you know it. But I know that you felt something last night. I just don't know you convinced you otherwise."
Without thinking Buffy did what she always did when she was upset. She hurt those who loved her most and kicked ass.
She let her fist fly into Spike's face and he sent her a sad look.
"Fine you won't admit it but I know you love me. So I'll just go."
He slammed the door shut and left Buffy standing there as a tear rolled down her cheek.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Author's Note: Well I personally just wanted send a big congratulations to WilliamsGirl on the conclusion of her story 'As You Wish' and to Zarrah for no real reason in particular. But enough with me and my thoughts, here's what's next!
Next on 'Pain is Love' //Chapter 6: Lost Little Girl//
Buffy can't tell what's real. All she knows is that Spike is the only one who doesn't ask anything of her. But in all this chaos a demon comes to town and it seems to want Spike out of the picture.
~*Chapter 5: Is It Love?*~
"Mm"
Buffy sat up on the bed and stared around the room. "Where the hell am I?" she whispered. That was when she spotted the gorgeous vamp beside her. She tightly placed the blood red blanket across her chest.
~*~*~*~
[Memory]
"Spike" Buffy moaned.
"Slayer"
"Spike"
"I love you."
She placed a fierce kiss on the vampire's lips and tasted his mouth. She left his lips and stared into his eyes as he continued his movements.
"Oh God" she screamed.
~*~*~*~
[Buffy's Thoughts]
Why would I? ...Do I love him.Spike? No! No! I can't he's...I can't. He's everything I'm supposed to hate. Everything I stand against.
So what I stand against love? What sense does that make?
I can't. I just can't love him. No matter what he's done for me. He's wrong. I'm wrong.
~*~*~*~
Buffy sends one last glance to her one-time-lover and notices his arm wrapped protectively around her waist.
She carefully moves his arm and he grunts with disapproval.
She searches the floor for her garments and sends one last glance in Spike's direction before changing and leaving. ~*~*~*~
"Slayer, Slayer, open the door, Buffy!"
Willow answered the door looking as calmly as possible after what Buffy had told her happened.
"Spike, what are you doing here?"
"Out of the way, Red. Need to have a few words with the Slayer."
~*~*~*~
"Hey you didn't knock first protested Buffy as she remained looking at her magazine.
"We need to have a little chat, Slayer."
She looked up and saw the anger etched on his face. He was torn apart and clearly not n a state to be messed with.
"Spike"
"That's right, Spike. You know the vamp you shagged senseless three nights ago?"
"I don't want to talk about that now."
"Well I bloody well do. How do you think it feels Buffy? I looked for you and called your house and no one answered. You didn't get the bloody messages? You didn't even go out to patrol. I didn't want to come over here yelling the way I am to you so your friends could hear but you gave me no choice. How do you think it feels? Being left alone and treated like a one- night harlot?"
"It meant nothing, Spike."
"Oh it meant nothing? That's why you come over my crypt every night to sleep? That why you suddenly began to confide in me? That why you let me tell you I love you and for once you didn't kick me in the ass about it?"
"Just let go, Spike. It was good but it was only a one time thing it meant nothing."
"Who made you believe that? Did Xander or one of the Scoobs tell you that?"
"Just let me go!"
"I can't! I love you."
"No you don't."
"You think I haven't tried not too? You think I just welcomed these feelings with open arms? Let me tell you something. You welcomed me with more than open arms and that skimpy little outfit."
"Spike, please just go."
"No I admit it. You've had me by the shorthairs. I love you, you know it. But I know that you felt something last night. I just don't know you convinced you otherwise."
Without thinking Buffy did what she always did when she was upset. She hurt those who loved her most and kicked ass.
She let her fist fly into Spike's face and he sent her a sad look.
"Fine you won't admit it but I know you love me. So I'll just go."
He slammed the door shut and left Buffy standing there as a tear rolled down her cheek.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Author's Note: Well I personally just wanted send a big congratulations to WilliamsGirl on the conclusion of her story 'As You Wish' and to Zarrah for no real reason in particular. But enough with me and my thoughts, here's what's next!
Next on 'Pain is Love' //Chapter 6: Lost Little Girl//
Buffy can't tell what's real. All she knows is that Spike is the only one who doesn't ask anything of her. But in all this chaos a demon comes to town and it seems to want Spike out of the picture.