Ch 10 - Oh! Then I see that Queen Mab hath been with you.

By the end of the day, Sam Carter was in absolutely no mood to have another conversation about her little problem. Not with Daniel, or Teal'c, and certainly not with Colonel O'Neill. She was exhausted from the long day of crouching in the dusty sand in the scorching sun, and she couldn't remember the last time she had a decent night's sleep. All she felt like doing was taking a hot shower and curling up in her bed at home. Climbing into her grimy sleeping bag still covered with a fine layer of sand was not exactly inviting. Plus she knew she'd be so paranoid about sleeping around the guys tonight she wouldn't be able to at all. At least they were going home tomorrow, she thought grumpily as she took the MRE Daniel handed her. She didn't even feel like eating. All she wanted to do was sleep.

The Colonel came over with his own ration and sat down loudly next to her. "Hey, Carter, are you recording the Simpsons for me?"

She restrained herself from rolling her eyes, but just barely. "I wasn't aware that was in my job description, sir."

"It's not," he said casually, not bothered by the irritated tone of her voice. "I was just hoping you might be. I still can't get my Tivo to work right. Maybe you could come have a look at it when we get back?"

She felt her cheeks get hot as she remembered part of one of their imaginary conversations that had led up to quite a good kiss. Swallowing the mouthful of whatever it was she was eating, she said, "Sure."

"Good. Actually, I was kind of wondering if you wanted to go back now."

"What? Why would..."

"You just seem like you could use a break. I mean, you're obviously exhausted, it's not like we're in a dangerous situation here. I don't think Hammond would mind if..."

"Well, nice to know I'm not even needed," she snapped, suddenly not even caring that she was being insubordinate. She stood up quickly, tossing her MRE back at Daniel, who was watching them both in a shocked-into-frozen position, and glanced at her CO as she stomped off away from their campsite. He looked completely stunned at her behavior.

She was certain she would be stunned herself once she cooled down, but at the moment she was too irritated by everything in the world to care. She crashed angrily through the forest, not even minding where she was going. Suddenly it occurred to her she was near the lake they had checked out on their first day, which fortunately, according to the MALP, did not have any fish in it big enough for O'Neill to bother about trying to catch. It was freezing cold, but she felt so grimy and frustrated at the moment that she was suddenly glad of the fact.

Knowing she was blatantly defying protocol, she sat down on a rock and started pulling off her boots. She was glad the planet was orbited by two large and relatively close moons; it made visibility even the dead of night possible. She stripped down to her black underwear and bra, sure that at some point Daniel would probably come find her and therefore reluctant to remove anything else. Oh well, she would just go commando after she got out of the water. She scrambled out onto one of the larger rocks that jutted out into the lake and dove off of it.

She hit the icy water so hard that it knocked her breath away. She knew it was cold but hadn't been expecting it to be that cold. Teeth chattering, she started swimming on her back, hoping to get used to it fast. At least she had got all the sand and sweat off of herself. It suddenly occurred to her that it had been incredibly stupid to dive off a rock into an alien lake without any knowledge of how deep it was or anything. Oh well. Nothing had happened, except that she was now so cold she doubted she'd ever be warm again.

She was about to head back over to the rock and haul herself out when the last voice she wanted to hear at the moment suddenly barked, "CARTER!"

She looked up at her CO, who was standing on the edge of the rock she had just jumped off of. "Sir, in case you couldn't tell, I came out here to be alone!" she yelled. Well, she had already committed major insubordination, might as well say what was on her mind.

"Tough!" he called back. "Get up here, now."

"With all due respect, sir," she said icily, "I will come up when I'm ready to." Which would have been five minutes ago if you weren't standing there, she thought to herself as she tried to keep her teeth from chattering.

"That was an order, Major. Get up here right now."

"You're standing between me and my clothes," she argued.

"Ohforcryinoutloud... You're going to freeze. I want to talk to you." At least he had stopped barking at her. She knew she was playing a dangerous game; he was on the verge of losing his patience, which was never a pretty thing. He'd never lost it with her before though... maybe if she stayed in the water just a little bit longer, the part of her brain that kept making her have those damn dreams would freeze too...

Her thoughts were interrupted by a loud splash nearby. She turned angrily to her CO as he surfaced right next to her, swearing and wiping his face angrily. "Dammit Carter this is freezing!"

"That's why I didn't ask you to join me!"

"Do you mind telling me what the hell is bothering you so much that you felt the need to throw yourself off a very dangerous looking rock in the middle of the night?"

"Actually, yes, I DO mind as a matter of fact," she said, swimming towards the rock. He grabbed her ankle and pulled her back.

"Let go of me," she said evenly, turning to glare at him. He let go of her leg, but the look on his face warned her not to try and swim away again or he'd just do the same thing.

"Okay then, how about this. Do you mind telling me what it is that I appear to have done to piss you off so much?"

She was freezing, this was ridiculous. He wanted to know, fine. "You KISSED her. Right in front of me. Do you have any idea how weird that was to see? It was bizarre... I don't know what to do with that..."

"You're acting insane because I kissed your twin?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes."

"I don't understand... what's the big deal?"

Now she was even more frustrated than before. Even as she was about to say it, she knew she was now even more upset than ever before that he was about to make her utter possibly the biggest cliché female line of all-time: "Well, if you don't know, I'm not going to tell you!" she said, trying to swim away from him again.

He grabbed her from behind and spun her around to look at him. Their legs kept knocking together as they both trod water. He was ignoring it; it was irritating her more than ever. "What the hell is that supposed to mean, Sam? You know I'm an idiot. You're going to have to spell it out."

"It means..." Suddenly she was positive she was about to burst into tears, and that was unacceptable. "I don't know what it means," she confessed. "I just can't stop... thinking about it."

"Jealous?" he asked teasingly with a big smug grin.

She rolled her eyes and pushed him, but he grabbed her arms again and crushed her to him. As soon as their freezing lips met she forgot how cold she was. This kiss was ten times as intense as any of the others she had imagined in her sleep. It seemed to go on forever... finally, part of her brain became coherent enough to remind her she should still be swimming, or they'd drown, and she should breathe at some point, or she'd die...

And suddenly she was coughing and spluttering, and two familiar voices were talking near her, and big hands turned her over onto her side and rubbed her back, and she kept coughing up water. When she finally stopped, someone rolled her onto her back again, there was a lot of talking, somebody was pushing her hair out of her face, she felt herself being wrapped up in something warm, and she recognized her CO's voice, sounding really far away, saying, "Teal'c, carry her." Then everything went fuzzy.

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A/N: Points to people who work out which bits were real and which weren't.