"Circles"

By Aeryn

Chapter 6

The next morning he felt better; he was certainly acting like he felt better, anyway; whistling while he got ready for work, skipping down the hallway at puke time, doling out fresh toothbrushes and wiping her face with a cold wash cloth, infuriatingly cheerful the entire time.

After her third run-in with the porcelain god she leaned back against the wall and glared at him. "Why are YOU in such a good mood?" she said, irritated. Nothing more annoying than a man who sings "maybe I'm amazed at the way you're puking all the time" in your ear while you're puking.

He paused in the middle of putting toothpaste on her toothbrush. "You know, I'm not sure. Maybe it's because I'm married to a beautiful, grouchy, pregnant woman, and we won't have to hide that anymore."

"That's right, isn't it? No more sneaking around."

"No more quickies in the broom closet."

"That never happened."

"No, but I wouldn't have minded. You about ready?"

"Let me brush my teeth for the zillionth time."

"Please do."

She glared.

He set her toothbrush down by the sink and scurried out of the room. Whistling.

The SGC was abuzz. Rumors swirled and eddied, speculation tried to swim the English Channel, and the truth sat in a dark corner waiting to be discovered.

"Hammond's here!" "What? Why?" "O'Neill's retiring." "No!" "I HOPE he's retiring." "Oh, he's not that bad." "He's done a great job, considering he's a dumbass." "I'll tell him you said that!" "Don't you DARE!" "You're just mad because he made you take all those stupid hamsters home." "They were nice hamsters!" "Not very hygienic." "I took very good care of them, cleaned out their cages every day!" "Yes, but keeping them in the KITCHEN?"

At 1000 hours (10 a.m. in regular people time) Hammond called all those personnel who weren't busy or off-world or busy AND off-world to a large lecture hall on one of the upper levels. The members of SG-1, past and present, sat in the front row, the married part of the team looking at one another warily.

"This is it," Jack said.

"Guess so."

"Ready?"

"That'd be a huge NO."

"Feeling all right?"

"That'd be another no. I wonder if he's going to want us to say anything?"

"Well, I know Hammond very, very well, and I have NO idea."

"He didn't say anything to you about this?"

"Not that I could hear over all the noise that Scotch was making."

Daniel leaned over. "You're in trouble, you're in trouble!" he chanted, grinning.

Sam glared. "Don't YOU start."

Behind them the buzz of the crowd was getting buzzier.

"So, Hammond's here, eh?"

"Yep. Bet he's here to bounce O'Neill out on his ass."

"Probably. O'Neill's muscle. O'Neill's all muscle. His brain is muscle."

Jack turned around and glared. Cols. Sanderson and Cossairt, leaders of SG-4 and SG-7, sat there and grinned. They'd known him for years; had served with him in the Gulf, and had no compunction about giving him hell, rank be damned.

He turned back around and sighed. "This oughta be fun," he said.

Sam slunk down in her seat.

Hammond entered finally, making his way to the lectern at the front of the hall.

"We have several things to cover today and I know you're all busy, so let's get to it. Gen. O'Neill and Col. . . .Carter?"

That last bit was a question, and she'd been thinking about the answer for a long time.

"O'Neill, sir. Col. O'Neill."

BZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZZZZBZZZZZZMARRIED?!BZZBZZBZZZZZBZZZBZZ

Jack stared at her. When had THAT happened? Then he grinned, 'cause he felt all warm and fuzzy and manly and crap.

"Right," said Hammond. "Gen. O'Neill and Col. O'Neill, I believe you have an announcement to make?"

They looked at one another, inhaled deeply, then stood up to face the crowd.

He nudged her. She nudged him back. He pushed her forward. She ducked behind him.

He sighed.

"An announcement, yes," he said. "Aherm. Col. Car-, I mean, Col. O'Neill and I have gotten married."

GASPBZZZZZZREGS???BZZZZZBZZZZABOUTDAMNEDTIMEBZZBZZZZZBZZ

They slunk back to their seats.

Hammond looked at them. "Nothing further you'd like to say?"

Sam shook her head vigorously. It was one thing to get pregnant out of wedlock, not that big a deal, really, but not something one wanted to announce in front of hundreds of people. That rumor would make its way round soon enough.

"Very well, then. I'm sure you're all wondering about violations of the fraternization regulations. I've discussed the matter with the President" (name-dropping BIG names always helped knock the buzz level down a notch or two) "And we came to an agreement on how to deal with the situation. I can assure you we've acted in strict compliance with the regulations and appropriate actions have been taken."

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbzzzzz

"Firstly, Col. O'Neill has been removed from SG-1."

GASP!

"She will continue her work on base, answering to me. Secondly, Gen. O'Neill has been removed from his position as commander of this facility . . ."

DOUBLEGASP!

"And will resume his position as leader of SG-1. And finally, I will be resuming command of the SGC."

Wild applause and a couple of yippees from somewhere in the back. Jack started to glare but gave up and just sulked.

"Aw, Jack, it's not you. You did a great job. They just missed Hammond, everybody loves Hammond," Daniel yelled above the roar of the crowd.

"Nobody loved me." Pout.

Sam ginned. "Walter does."

"I do," Daniel said, waggling his eyebrows.

"I love you as well, O'Neill," Teal'c said.

THAT stopped him in his metaphoric tracks. He looked at Teal'c. "You DO?"

"Indeed."

"Well . . . uh, I love you, too, Teal'c."

Teal'c bowed his head and tried not to smirk.

Jack turned to Sam, who was giggling.

"What about you?"

"Me? Oh, no. I just use you for your body."

Sulk. "Not lately."

She smacked him on the back of the head and they all returned their attention to Hammond.

"Now that we're all clear on the situation, we can all get back to work. Dismissed."

Sanderson and Cossairt leaned forward. "Married? Never thought I'd see the day."

"Doesn't deserve her."

"Nope, way too smart for him."

"And too beautiful."

"Now, she'd been perfect for ME . . ."

Jack whirled around and grabbed Sanderson by the lapels. "You knock that shit off, colonel!"

Sam was giggling again.

"Lighten up, Jack," Sanderson said, grinning. "And congratulations, you grouchy old bastard."

"Yeah, you bastard, congratulations," said Cossairt. He leaned down to Sam and whispered loudly. "Good luck, colonel. You sure as hell are gonna need it."

They hurried out of them room before Jack could kick any ass.

The bits and pieces of SG-1 looked at one another.

"Guess that's it."

"Guess so."

"You guys had better not have any fun without me," Sam said.

"Oh, we won't."

"Not one teeny tiny bit."

"I shall endeavor to make sure no fun is had."

She sighed. They were gonna have tons of fun, she just knew it. "Back to work then. See you guys later." She headed off for the lab.

Jack hopped up. "I've gotta go see Hammond."

"Mission tomorrow, Jack."

He paused. A mission! Part of him jumped up and down in glee, another part worried he'd get his ass killed and leave a baby without father, a wife without a husband. Bleargh. He pushed the thoughts away.

"Yeah, I know. Meet you guys in my old office in fifteen."

"Sir?"

"Hey, Jack, come on in."

"Listen, sir, I didn't get a chance to clean out the desk."

"Don't worry about it, I'll have it taken care of."

"And I've been having trouble with one of the drawers . . ."

Hammond grasped the handle of said drawer and it slid open with ease.

"Ah-HA! I KNEW it!"

"Knew what, Jack? And what is all this stuff in here?"

Jack sighed.

"Jellybeans."

Poke.

"Jack."

Poke.

"Jack?"

Poke, poke, poke, poke, POKE.

"Mmmf! Wha . . .?"

He rolled over and looked at her. A candle was burning on the nightstand.

"What is it? Donuts? Deviled eggs? Everything okay? Why are you looking at me like that? What is wrong with you? Are you GROWLING?"

She pounced.

"Eeeeeek!"

She straddled him and squirmed against his crotch.

"Did you just scream like a girl?" she asked.

"No, I screamed like someone who was scared his pregnant wife was about to eat him."

She grinned. "I am."

"Hey! You're all naked and stuff, Mrs. O'Neill!" He still couldn't get over that part. Warmfuzzywarmfuzzy . . .hey!bighard-on!

"And you're not."

He quickly took care of that situation and she slid back on top of him.

"Remember the other day when I said I was hornier than I'd ever been in my life?"

"Oh, yes."

"Well, now I'm even hornier." She grinned.

"What a coincidence! Me, too!"

"I can tell." She smiled wolfishly, then attacked.

A bit later, after having a very nice time, twice, she collapsed beside him. "God, that was . . .zzzzzzzzzz."

Wow. Asleep already. That beat even his best record; at least he could complete a sentence before dropping off after sex. He smiled.

He kissed her and pulled the covers over them both and blew out the candle.