Somehow I managed to talk McGonagall into conjuring up two chili dogs and a
can of Sierra Mist.Naturally,she was quite perplexed by my interest in
"muggle" food,
but I simply feed her a load of shit about how I admired muggles like
Arthur Weasley.One might question why I'd select a can of muggle soda when
I had the once in a lifetime opportunity to taste a butterbeer,but I can't
go two hours without sucking down a can of diet pop.
I sat at one of the ridiculously long tables in the great hall,a greedy pig with a chili coated face and my hand wrapped around the soda can like it was about to fly away.
Just then the double doors opened and Quirrell walked in carrying a tray.I quickly set down the can,grabbed a knapkin and rubbed furiously at my face until it was red and sore.As he approached the table I dropped the napkin and watched him sit down. On his tray was a turkey sandwhich,a cauldron cake,and a butterbeer.He smiled nervously.
"A-A b-bit c-cold in here,eh?"He asked,his shaky fingers working the top on the butterbeer.
"Yeah,kind of."
I took a sip of soda,watching him closely.
"So,....t-tell me a little a-about yo-yourself."
I shook my head.
"Nothing interesting about me.I'd love to hear about you though,Professor.I hear you went to Albania.What did you do there?See anything interesting?"
"Y-You mean Romania?"
"Right,Romania.Did you meeet anybody interesting there?"
A spasm of fear flickered across his face.VOLDEMORT was written all over it.He took a bite of his turkey sandwhich and stared down at his tray.
"I thought It'd be n-n-nice to g-get some first hand experience w-with the sort of creatures you don't n-normally see around here.Hags,vampires,all sorts."
I nodded and decided to take it another step further.
"I heard you never stuttered until you returned.Why do you stutter now?"
He looked even more nervous,no matter how much he tried to hide it.I was asking a bit too much.
"W-Well.....it was hard.I saw a fair share of d-d-disturbing things on my travels. F-For one,a hag went at my throat.I-I thought t-that was the last of me,what with her hands around my throat.O-Only one of several disturbing things.So...I guess I'll never be exactly t-the same."
I nodded with genuine sympathy.
"I like it."
He looked up from his sandwhich,puzzled.
"H-Hmmm?"
"I think it's very cute.Adorable.A lot of chicks dig guys with stutters."
I swear at that moment I could almost hear Voldy cracking up back there.
"O-Oh,you think so?"
"Mmm hmm."I decided to take it another step further.At this point,with him sitting in front of me,me with the upper hand,I was ready to tell Carla to kiss my ass.
"And you've never married?"I asked,taking a last sip of soda."Honestly now,I find that one hard to believe."I leaned forward,my eyes gleaming mischeviously."You see,I always assumed that's what drop dead gorgeous men do.Get married.Maybe I was mistaken."I leaned a little closer.
He backed his chair up quickly.I'd obviously invaded his space.
"N-No....never...n-never married."He gave me a strange look and quickly grabbed his tray with shaking fingers."I-I'm gonna go up to my office.L- Lotta work still left to do..for tommorow."
I nodded,slightly embarrassed.
"Alright.It was nice talking to you,Professor.See you tommorow."
He nodded and walked out the double doors.
I sat at one of the ridiculously long tables in the great hall,a greedy pig with a chili coated face and my hand wrapped around the soda can like it was about to fly away.
Just then the double doors opened and Quirrell walked in carrying a tray.I quickly set down the can,grabbed a knapkin and rubbed furiously at my face until it was red and sore.As he approached the table I dropped the napkin and watched him sit down. On his tray was a turkey sandwhich,a cauldron cake,and a butterbeer.He smiled nervously.
"A-A b-bit c-cold in here,eh?"He asked,his shaky fingers working the top on the butterbeer.
"Yeah,kind of."
I took a sip of soda,watching him closely.
"So,....t-tell me a little a-about yo-yourself."
I shook my head.
"Nothing interesting about me.I'd love to hear about you though,Professor.I hear you went to Albania.What did you do there?See anything interesting?"
"Y-You mean Romania?"
"Right,Romania.Did you meeet anybody interesting there?"
A spasm of fear flickered across his face.VOLDEMORT was written all over it.He took a bite of his turkey sandwhich and stared down at his tray.
"I thought It'd be n-n-nice to g-get some first hand experience w-with the sort of creatures you don't n-normally see around here.Hags,vampires,all sorts."
I nodded and decided to take it another step further.
"I heard you never stuttered until you returned.Why do you stutter now?"
He looked even more nervous,no matter how much he tried to hide it.I was asking a bit too much.
"W-Well.....it was hard.I saw a fair share of d-d-disturbing things on my travels. F-For one,a hag went at my throat.I-I thought t-that was the last of me,what with her hands around my throat.O-Only one of several disturbing things.So...I guess I'll never be exactly t-the same."
I nodded with genuine sympathy.
"I like it."
He looked up from his sandwhich,puzzled.
"H-Hmmm?"
"I think it's very cute.Adorable.A lot of chicks dig guys with stutters."
I swear at that moment I could almost hear Voldy cracking up back there.
"O-Oh,you think so?"
"Mmm hmm."I decided to take it another step further.At this point,with him sitting in front of me,me with the upper hand,I was ready to tell Carla to kiss my ass.
"And you've never married?"I asked,taking a last sip of soda."Honestly now,I find that one hard to believe."I leaned forward,my eyes gleaming mischeviously."You see,I always assumed that's what drop dead gorgeous men do.Get married.Maybe I was mistaken."I leaned a little closer.
He backed his chair up quickly.I'd obviously invaded his space.
"N-No....never...n-never married."He gave me a strange look and quickly grabbed his tray with shaking fingers."I-I'm gonna go up to my office.L- Lotta work still left to do..for tommorow."
I nodded,slightly embarrassed.
"Alright.It was nice talking to you,Professor.See you tommorow."
He nodded and walked out the double doors.