Disclaimer: It's not mine, I just enjoy messing with their heads, lol!
A/N: YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! But you already knew that right? Of course you did, cause you're all super-duper, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, zip-a-dee-doo-da reviewers and readers! I love y'all a bunch of bananas for all the positive things you said! Now, because I love y'all so much lol, this will be a longer, lovey-doveyness, jam-packed chapter with lots of crapola happening! And there's gonna be some big Severus/Hermione talking parts, and maybe some more smooches, cool huh?
A/N 2: Right now I'm at college and getting all settled in. I apologise that this took so long to get posted, but I've been trying to get my internet working. Actually I still haven't, but I'm using a library computer to post this cause I didn't want to make you guys wait any more. Also, with classes having started, I'm not sure how much I'll be able to write, so let me once again let you all now updates may be slower in coming. So please hang in there, and now, onto the story!
Take Time to Smell the Roses
Chapter Twenty One
The morning after their first kiss, Severus woke up to beams of sunlight dancing upon his face. Moving slowly, he turned onto his side and propped himself on his elbow and stared at the woman lying next to him, still sleeping peacefully. Her hair that she pulled back every night was now frizzy and coming undone. There were creases on one side of her face from the pillow, and the other side of her face was squished against her hand. He thought she had never looked more beautiful then she did right there. Once again moving slowly so as not to wake her, he climbed out of bed and went into the kitchen to make her breakfast. After preparing the tray, he carried it back in and set it on the bedside table.
"Good morning Hermione," he said sitting down next to her, pressing a quick kiss to her brow. "I've brought you your breakfast."
"Ugh, it's too early," she moaned as she stretched, but pushed herself into a sitting position. "But then again, every day starts too early for my liking. But you get major points for bringing me breakfast in bed. Any special reason? You usually just leave it out on the table."
"After what happened the other day I just wanted to let you know I care," he smiled at her look of confusion.
"But I already know that you goose."
"Goose?"
"Yes, you're being a silly goose right now," she said in reply to his comment and raised eyebrow.
"Out of curiosity, how would you describe our relationship right now Hermione?" Severus asked after a few moments of silence. "And honestly please."
"You are one of my best friends Sev," she said without a moment's hesitation. "You seem to care for me no matter what and you have been there for me without question. You offer your support, without asking for anything in return. You make me feel special; like when I need you, you will drop anything, no matter what it is. You've made me feel like I have choices, and that I can make any choice and it will be okay with you. You hold my hand when it needs to be held, and you push me forward when I need to be pushed, but you stay a step behind in case I need to be caught."
"You really think that?"
"Yeah, and you're a killer chef," she smiled, laughter in her eyes.
"Hmph," he gave her a mock glare. "Its comments like that that reminds me you're still a teenager."
"And yet you still love me," she said teasingly, leaning forward and kissing him quickly.
"And yet I do," he replied quietly, completely serious.
"Wait, what?" Hermione sat up straight, dumbfounded and thinking she had misheard him.
"I said I do. Love you, I mean," he became slightly flustered. "I don't think I could have told you with less articulacy if I had tried, but I sincerely believe that I am falling in love with you."
"Wait…In love…With me…Why?" Hermione sat, still in shock, but now her mind was rushing a mile a minute, trying to sort through all the feelings and thoughts that were bubbling up at that simple statement.
"Do you even have to ask? In the short time we've been together, there have been so many things."
"Like what?" Hermione pressed. "Come on, you're allowed to be sappy, I won't tell."
"I don't do sappy," he said distastefully.
"Fine. Then do romantic, or sincere, or heartfelt."
"Fine. Well, I've never told you how beautiful I think you are. I've never told you how your laughter makes me feel warm. I've never told you that I love the way you push back your hair when you're frustrated. I've never told you how I love the way you cry when you are so happy you can't seem to handle it anymore," he smiled gently at her as he wiped a tear rolling down her cheek away with the pad of his thumb. "I've never told you I love the way you talk to me. I've never told you I love the way you twist your ring around on your finger when you're nervous. I've never told you I love how you scrunch your nose when you're studying or reading." He kissed her lips softly. "And now, I love the way you kiss."
"I guess you forgot to tell me a lot of things," Hermione said sniffling and smiling, more tears rolling down her cheeks. "Like the fact you really are a big softie at heart."
"I want to tell you everything now. I want you to tell me everything too," he held her face in his hands, and her hands came up to cover his. He looked deep in her eyes, searching almost, a part of him hoping that the next thing she would say was that she felt the same way as he did. However, he wouldn't press her. He had all the time in the world to hear her say it back, and he would patiently wait that long and longer if that's what it took.
"I already do, but I want you to know I need you. You've become my strength and my rock," she closed her eyes, her emotions overwhelming her.
"Thank you," he replied simply, leaning forward, wrapping her in a hug and kissing her forehead gently. He moved down and pressed a soft kiss to each eyelid, then each cheek, and finally, her lips. "Now, I have a class to go teach, and if I'm not mistaken, which I never am, you do too."
"Why you bastard!" Hermione pulled back laughing and smacked him on the shoulder.
"Maybe so, but you married me!" He smirked as he swept out of the room, her laughter following him out.
OooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooO
The next few weeks they continued to grow closer. Kisses had become something habitual between the two after that initial one. Severus was very much falling in love with her, and even though she consciously wouldn't admit it, she was falling in love with him. However, she just kept telling herself she cared about him as a friend, and nothing else.
"Hey Sev," Hermione called from their room, early in the afternoon on December seventh. "I'm leaving now to go meet Narcissa. I'm not sure how long I'll be, so I may or may not be back for dinner."
"All right love," he called back using a familiar endearment without looking up from the papers he was grading as a knock sounded on the door. "Enter!"
"Hello Professor," Ginny greeted him with a smile as she, Blaise, Harry, and Ron came in.
"Miss Weasley, Messrs. Zabini, Potter, and Weasley," he said courteously. Ginny had come to visit Hermione several times in the past few weeks, and he had grown to enjoy her company when he was around, although she was still too exuberant and bubbly at times for his liking.
"Hey guys!" Hermione greeted as she came out of the bedroom wearing an expensive looking, fitted dark blue velvet robe with faux fur trim around the collar and sleeves. "What are you doing here?"
"We came to drag you to Hogsmede with us for the afternoon!" Harry smiled pleadingly at her. "You don't get out enough."
"Whatever Harry," Hermione laughed. "And I'm already going to Hogsmede, but I can't spend the day with you, I'm sorry."
"Huh? Why not?" Ron wanted to know. "And why are you playing Lady Snape today? You're all dressed up."
"I'm having tea with Narcissa…uh, Mrs. Malfoy," Hermione stated matter of factly. "And don't say I can't. She invited me months ago, and besides, she's sort of family, I can't quite refuse."
"She'll be fine Mr. Weasley. I'm sure she's quite adept at hexes and jinxes," Severus stood up and came over and kissed her quickly. "Have a good time, and be careful."
"I will," she smiled reassuringly at him as he disappeared into the kitchen before turning back to the others, one of whom was staring at her. "What?"
"He kissed you," Ron stated dumbly.
"I know," Hermione stared at him, one eyebrow raised.
"And you didn't run away screaming."
"Of course not, what's your point?" Ginny hid a laugh at Hermione's reply. She wasn't phased, as she had seen the way Snape lovingly treated Hermione in the times she had visited and seen the two of them interact.
"I…I actually don't know," Ron stopped and thought for a moment. "I just didn't realise you two were so…close. Or that you actually kissed each other. Oh god, you kissed the snarky bastard!"
"Ron, I don't have time for this, so let me spell it out quickly for you. He and I are M-A-R-R-I-E-D…get that through your head. He loves me, so of course he's going to kiss me. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm meeting Narcissa in twenty minutes, so I've got to go!" Hermione gave the others a quick smile before sweeping out of the room.
"He loves her?" Harry said aloud to no one in particular.
"Yeah, it's fairly obvious if you know what to look for," Blaise smiled at Ginny and wrapped an arm around her waist. He had been hanging out with her and Harry and Ron more frequently in the past weeks since the two found out about them being together. Ron and Harry were making an effort to befriend him because Ginny cared about him, and they cared about her. The rest of the Slytherin's hadn't been quite so welcoming of Ginny, but Blaise was never one who really cared about the opinions of others. And of course, Professor Dumbledore was delighted with the inter-house relationship, and the others that were now appearing.
"I guess," Harry responded, thinking back. "Do you think she loves him? Or has told him anyways?"
"Knowing Mione, probably not," Ginny said sadly. "You know she's afraid that she'll be laughed at and be hurt. And it was all that bloody bastard Krum's fault."
"Yeah, that would be Mione," Ron agreed as Snape came back into the room.
"You haven't left yet? Detention you two, seven o'clock with me tomorrow," Snape smirked at Harry and Ron. "I have some cauldrons that need to be cleaned."
"But what about them?!" Harry said indignantly, pointing at Ginny and Blaise.
"I like them, now get out!" And with that the four of them left, Harry and Ron rushing out in a whirlwind while Blaise and Ginny said a quick good-bye before heading calmly out of the room.
OooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooO
"Hermione, so good to see you dear!" Narcissa called as she stepped down from her carriage in front of Madame Puddifoot's. "How are you doing?"
"I'm fine Narcissa, thank you," she returned the customary kiss-the-air-by-the-cheek greeting and walked into the tea shop along side of her.
The moment they walked in, several people came rushing over to take their coats and hang them up. Hermione thanked them with a smile, but Narcissa simply stood there, nose wrinkled, looking at them as if they were nothing but dirt under her shoe. Madame Puddifoot herself came bustling out of the back in a flash of bright colours and seated them herself in a private room. She returned a few minutes later with their orders and told them to simply call if they needed anything. Hermione sat through all of this slightly shocked, although in retrospect she shouldn't have been. They were two very wealthy women, from well known and important families, and that commanded a certain respect from many people. Narcissa had been around it all her life, and therefore thought nothing of it. Severus had talked with Hermione about it, but it still surprised her every day.
"Well, now that we're alone and away from all those minimum wage idiots, how are you doing my dear, really?" Narcissa wrapped her long fingered, graceful and smooth hands around her tea cup.
"I'm doing well. A little tired from preparing some upcoming tests for the second and third years, but other than that everything's going well," Hermione took a sip of her peppermint tea, something she had become addicted too, thanks to Severus.
"Well that's good. Oh! I wanted to apologise on behalf of my son," Narcissa shook her head in disapproval. "For his abominable actions against you all those weeks ago. He was severely punished at home, I can assure you. Lucius made sure he wouldn't do something like that ever again."
"It's all right Narcissa. He owled Severus and I an apology," Hermione almost blanched thinking of what Lucius had done.
"Still," she took a sip of her tea while looking at Hermione with a calculating look. "So, how are you and Severus doing?"
"We're fine," Hermione looked down at her cup a moment, debating with herself about what to tell Narcissa before she began speaking again. "He told me he's falling in love with me."
"Really? And what do you think about that?" Narcissa kept her face carefully blank, but inside she was experiencing a degree of surprise. She had never actually imagined he was actually capable of that, as she had told him previously. Well, as they say, never say never. And besides, this would make her news all the more enjoyable to tell.
"I don't know," Hermione said anxiously. She hadn't really told anyone about her and Severus, and she wanted desperately to talk to someone. The fact that their potions professor was in love with her wasn't something many other students cared about. "I do know that I care dearly for him."
"And love?"
"I think it's a big word. It holds a lot of promise, expectations, and responsibilities. It's not something I think anyone should take lightly. It's a scary thing…terrifying really."
"I don't think it's quite as bad as you think it is Hermione," Narcissa said, as gently as she could without disgusting herself. For all the bitch that she could be, (and she would readily admit that she was, most of the time) there were times it was better for her to at least act as if she cared. "Let me ask you something else that might help you figure out your feelings a little better."
"Okay."
"What is Severus' role in your life? And think for a moment before you answer."
Hermione sat there, thinking as Narcissa suggested. Narcissa sat there patiently for several minutes, watching the emotions flicker through Hermione's eyes. She smirked to herself as she watched the girl. Hermione was one of those people who could hide mask her emotions as much as she wanted, but her eyes would always betray what she really thought.
"He…he is my…strength, one of the few people who has never expected me to be something I'm not. There is this part of my heart that he's captured, and that belongs to him," Hermione shook her head, laughing lightly. "It may sound silly, but I'm sitting here trying so hard to explain this to you, and even to myself, and I can't put it into words. I can't explain what he means to me, because his friendship means everything. When I am at my weakest he holds me up. When I am at my strongest, he celebrates that with me. When I am sad, he feels that. And when I'm happy, he's happy with me."
"It doesn't sound silly," Narcissa reassured her, although truthfully, she somewhat agreed. But then again, the girl was just that, a girl, and not quite grown up.
"We just seem to have this connection. When something good happens to him, I feel like it's happening to me. When someone hurts him, I feel the pain and I want to make it go away for him. He is my best friend in every sense of the word. I guess…maybe we've been kindred spirits all along…and never knew it," Hermione's eyes dawned with something akin to realization as she thought over what she had just said. "I'm sorry Narcissa, but I need to leave."
"Oh, before you do," Narcissa smirked. She knew Hermione had probably just had an epiphany and realized she was in love with that old bastard, and wanted to go tell him. "The reason I needed to see you was because of something I came across a few weeks after your marriage."
"Yes?" Hermione stopped walking a few feet away and turned around slowly. She didn't like the tone of Narcissa's voice as she spoke just then and immediately became suspicious. She knew Narcissa hadn't just wanted to chat, and now felt incredibly dumb for sharing everything she just had with her.
"Well, I had been reading the muggle newspaper, checking up on my stocks you know," she stopped and took a long sip of tea. "And I came across the most interesting notice and article."
"Really? What about?" Hermione asked hesitantly, a sense of dread coming over her, although for the life of her she couldn't figure out why.
"It was about this little church in muggle London. The England Alliance Church, and its pastor," Narcissa took another sip of tea, and Hermione wanted to scream at her to get on with it already. "Apparently there was this huge scandal! The pastor there never actually went to seminary to get his degree. He's been posing as a minister because he claimed that's what the Lord commanded him to do. Of course he's now in the local insane asylum, but as I was saying, there was a notice accompanying the article with a list of names of people he had married while posing as an ordained minister. Because he wasn't ordained, anyone he married is actually not married in accordance with England's laws. And imagine my shock when I saw your and Severus' names!"
"Oh my god," Hermione stared at her in shock, one hand slowly covering her mouth. "Please tell me you're joking."
"Sorry dear," Narcissa gave a mock sympathetic look. "Now, I know you had somewhere to run off too so I won't keep you any longer."
"Good-bye Narcissa, I'm sure I'll see you again."
"Yes, we'll have to do this again in the future, it was so much fun!" Narcissa smirked and twiddled her fingers as Hermione rushed out of the room in a panic.
OooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooOooO
"Dammit!" Hermione cursed aloud as she ran towards the dungeons. "Damn Narcissa, damn that minister, damn me for realizing I'm in love with him and damn the fact I'm not even married to him."
"Hermione?" A familiar voice called as she rushed past.
"Severus?" she stopped short and turned around. She went weak with relief and began to cry as her eyes took in him standing there with a look of confusion and concern evident on his face. "We have a big problem!"
"I'm sure what ever it is, it's not as bad as you seem to think it is," Severus tried to calm her as he led her back to their room and sat her down on the couch next to him. He was determined to take care of her himself, without calling in Potter. "What's wrong love?"
"We're n-not, m-m-married!" Hermione burst out in a sob, and after a spell of crying, calmed herself enough to explain what Narcissa had told her.
"Shh, calm down," Severus sat in shock, his mind racing, as he ran his hand comfortingly over her back.
"Thanks," Hermione looked at him as she pulled back slightly, wiping the tears away from her face. "But what happens now?"
"Well, now I guess you're free to live your life as you so choose," Severus stood up and turned away from her, not wanting her to see how truly upset he was about the news. "You know how I feel about you Hermione, but I won't hold you back."
"I…Thank you Severus," Hermione looked down at her hands, feeling guilty. She knew she loved him, and she knew that she loved him even more right now for his complete selflessness, but every time she opened her mouth to tell him, an icy hand clenched tightly around her heart. "Will you still go with me to my cousin's wedding next week?"
"Of course," he said quietly, and as Hermione headed into the bedroom, he began transfiguring some items into blankets and a pillow.
"What are you doing?" Hermione stopped at the bedroom doorway when she heard him and turned to look at him.
"I think both of us need some time to think, away from each other."
Maybe so," Hermione said softly. "Good night then."
"Good night," he replied stiffly, without looking at her.
Hermione went into the bedroom and closed the door. Looking around the room, and more specifically at the bed, she felt a sudden burst of sadness well up inside. And without even changing out of her robes, ran and threw herself on the bed, where she sobbed into a pillow. Outside, Severus too was crying, although not quite so dramatically as Hermione. Both cried themselves to sleep, their last thought being that they had lost the one they loved.
A/N: Okay- there was a sad ending, but don't hate me! Anyways, I told ya in the beginning that this would be a jam-packed chapter, and wasn't it? Lots of stuff happening. Severus tells Mione he's falling in love with her. Then we jump a couple of weeks or whatever to December 7th for the 'tea party' with Narcissa who is once again up to her old tricks. Now they are un-married, and Hermione's mind and heart are battling each other. And now to top it off we have Hermione's cousin's wedding to look forward to, and later; Christmas at the Weasley's and a New Year's Eve party! Don't worry, things will get better for our happy couple, but not before one of two more 'bad' things happen. Anyways, I hope you liked it, because I did. If anyone plans to review saying that Sev isn't in character, then please don't bother telling me. I know he isn't in character, but it's tough to write him 'in character' being in love or romantic, because the only side J.K. shows us is his evil snarky bastard side. So I'm doing my best, and if you don't like it, you don't have to read. Anyways, review if you want, its okay if you don't.