Author: The Chibi Hime
Author's notes I know you've all been Dying to read this grin so I figured I'd finally stop being lazy and Html it so you all can enjoy. It's been written, just being me, I am a pro procrastinator. If it were a living, It would be my ideal job. So enjoy, your lucky I did it. lol
Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha or Kagome, they are their own man..wait..what?
Chapter four: like then
Kagome sat on her knees, looking down timidly at the ground, examining the dirt patterns in the grass. She had InuYasha there, after all her whining and dramatic scenes, she had him..now she lacked the words to tell him just how much she'd wanted to talk to him. She could feel his gaze upon her, although she couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes, so she instead chose to stare at the ground and shift uncomfortably every few minutes.
Her eyes finally darted upwards, not being able to stand the tension any longer, to find him staring straight at her, as she had thought. However, as soon as her eyes met his, his immediately focused on another spot conveniently right behind her.
Kagome braved a small smile. He sat there, in a squat, almost like a dog. The look on his face made him look as if he hadn't a clue what was going on, like that of a dog's. Although, the look in his eyes seemed a bit sad, seeing he, himself made her feel a little better.
She watched as his head cocked to the side when she smiled, which made her smile grow to a grin.
"What?" He finally ventured to ask.
"Nothing" She replied, still smiling at him.
This time, It was InuYasha who shifted uncomfortably.
"The well wouldn't let me." He blurted out rather unsuspectingly, even for himself.
"Where did that come from?" Kagome's smile faded slowly.
"That's what you wanted me to say isn't it?" He mumbled.
"What do you mean? I was just being happy. Is that such a bother to you?" She mumbled in a reply, folding her arms stubbornly.
"That look. The smile was just concealing the real hurt look in your eyes...boaring into me, as if You wanted me to admit it. so there you are." He said a tiny bit louder, looking her in the eyes again.
'Am I really that obvious? Was I really doing that..I- I didn't mean to..I think...' Kagome stared back, dumbfounded, a look of confusion on her face, no words escaping from her open lips.
"Sorry..I didn't know..It just-" InuYasha looked away, feeling as if he had humiliated himself enough for the time being.
"Sorry for what? It was my fault.." She mumbled.
"Now it's your fault?" He groaned "Make up your mind!"
"Make up your mind! Your the one changing your tune!" She snapped. "You really haven't changed."
The last remark seemed to leave InuYasha speechless. He turned his head, a hurt look in his eyes.
"I never realized you wanted me to change" He grumbled, trying to hide the fact that her last comment had effected him what so ever. "I'm not going to change, and if that is what your looking for..well you've come to the wrong place. I'm not your pet anymore." With that he stood and turned away readying himself to leave, the only thing Kagome was able to see was the glare of the afternoon sun in her eyes and InuYasha's flowing silver strands of hair.
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that!!" She cried " I never thought you were my pet! I can't believe you'd say that!"
"Join the club" InuYasha growled stubbornly, his back still towards her.
"Look, I said I was sorry. Please, would you sit back down already!" Kagome growled in a sad attempt of a nicer tone, feeling agitated, as if he weren't even listening to her. By now, she figured she would never get out what she'd been longing to tell him. She figured the day she'd see him again would be more rejoiceful than this, but instead, they stood there bickering like children. Just like they had before. It was "refreshing" to act like a little kid with him again sure, but it wasn't exactly the perfect planned moment Kagome would have liked.
With a grunt, InuYasha sat down as she had asked, although his attitude remained.
"So..." Kagome sighed nervously.
"So what?" InuYasha mumbled.
"So what about that? About what you said..." She sighed again, fading off at the very end of her sentence.
"What'd I say?" InuYasha looked puzzled.
"Your impossible" Kagome slapped herself in the forehead in frustration. "You know exactly what I'm talking about!"
"I don't" He crossed his arms stubbornly.
"Don't act like it didn't happen! Your making this alot more difficult than it should be!" She growled, raising her voice.
"Making what more difficult? You are the only one being difficult." He growled in reply.
"ME? ARGH!" Kagome clenched her fists to stop herself from hitting him. If she still had the power to sit him, she would have.
When she had restored the life of the maiden priestess, she had also removed the prayer beads from InuYasha's neck, setting him free of the charm. She thought she was doing the right thing, when apparently it wasn't. If there was anything InuYasha deserved right now, it would be a good 'sit'.
Before she could stop herself, the words, "Ouswari", seemed to escape from her lips.
Seconds after this happening however, Kagome clamped her hands over her big mouth, feeling both idiotic and embarrassed. The look on the hanyou's face showed that he also had mixed feelings about this. He looked as if he couldn't choose whether he should be amused or offended.
"Don't exactly miss that" He rolled his eyes, feeling the spot on his neck where the prayer beads would have been lying if they were there, without even thinking about it.
"You do miss everything else, don't you?" Kagome blurted out. If she was ever going to get the point, she may as well make a fool out of herself in the process of doing so, if that is what it took.
"What is this, an interrogation?" InuYasha crossed his arms stubbornly, his dark eyebrows narrowing.
"S-so you don't miss any of it?" She whimpered, starting a fake cry. Soon, her sniffles seemed to fill the air. She was even more proud of herself when she managed a few fake tears.
"Don't cry..I do miss it! I do! Just stop that!" He let his arms relax and fall to his side, in a pathetic attempt to soothe her. He never was very good at it.
"So then why didn't you come to see me?" Kagome asked at a more serious note.
"I told you already" He grumbled.
"aha! So you do remember saying it!" Kagome announced proudly, thrusting an accusing finger towards the annoyed hanyou.
"Saying what" His eyelids were now only half open as his golden brown eyes glared at Kagome.
"Why you. Stop avoiding it!" A sound as if a twig were breaking erupted into air. Startled, Kagome's eyes grew wide with amazement. She found her own hand held out a foot from InuYasha's face. ON his face was a dark red mark in the shape of her own hand.
Her hand stinging, she withdrew it timidly and placed it in her lap, massaging it with her other hand. The hanyou looked more than startled. He looked terrified for the first few seconds until the usual ticked look reappeared on his face.
"WHAT WAS THAT FOR!" He screamed, his right hand shooting up to cover up the embarrassing red mark and to soothe the sharp stinging feeling that still remained, minutes after the collision of Kagome's hand and his cheek.
"You know exactly what that was for" Kagome replied coldly, crossing her arms and sticking her nose in the air. " I Just wanted to tell you how much I missed you..but apparently you've been doing fine without me. I'm going to go." Kagome got to her feet, and turned sharply in the direction towards the village.
"Bye bye, InuYasha" She grumbled as she began to stomp away. Her feet made obnoxious crunching noises as they made contact with the ground. She hoped that he would stop her, but he didn't..she wanted to turn and look at him, but her gut wouldn't allow her.
Her stomach twisted into knots as she grew closer to the village and still no cry came from that spot in the woods where she left him. With a deep heartbreaking sigh, Kagome's head shot towards the spot she left him to find he wasn't there.
Feeling useless, Kagome turned forwards, taking another step to find something in front of her, too late for her to react. Whatever it was, she had collided with it hard and was sent backwards, losing her balance, and hit the ground with a thud.
Looking up, she found that 'it' was InuYasha, holding his hand out to her. Reluctantly, Kagome took it, allowing him to pull her to her feet. Now fully standing, Kagome's eyes met his again. They stood there for quite some time, gazing into eachother's eyes.
Try as she might, Kagome was unable to look away.
"Fine.." He sighed "After you restored kikyou's life, I thought that maybe you'd stay..at least for a while. Instead you left, without any warning.Naturally, I was heartbroken...I seriously doubted that you would come back. I waited by the well, day after day like a moron. Just staring into it, But,After while, I grew tired of waiting and tried the well myself...It wouldn't work. I only found dirt and remains of dead Youkai at the bottom. I figured it was time to face realitly...you liked the way things back home were and no longer wished to see me...So to the best of my ability, I went back to my life..With Kikyou.."
"As I told you..My old life doesn't even compare to my life here..with you...You have no Idea the hell I've gone through, thinking maybe you'd come back for me..but you didn't...I felt as if I were cold and dead now that Kikyou was alive and well." Kagome continued to stare transfixed into the hanyou's eyes, looking emotionless " I don't care if you have feelings for kikyou...or even if you don't feel the same way about me..it doesn't matter anymore..I love you...I always had."
"You do? After all I've put you through..I thought It would be impossible to love someone like me..." His voice was soft, somewhat like a whisper.
"Of course I do..What do you mean "someone like me"...You are a wonderful person..and there is no one else like you..that's good, you know." Kagome's eyes seemed to sparkle, as her pink lips curled into a tiny smile. This, along with her age, made her look more like Kikyou than ever.
To Kagome's surprise, with a swift motion, InuYasha swept forward unsuspectingly and grabbing hold of both of Kagome's wrists, he yanked her forward into a tight embrace. She could feel him trembling. 'It really must be hard from him..until now I've been too stupid to realize it...'
Kagome pressed the side of her face to his chest and wrapping her arms around him, she returned the hug, feeling so happy she felt as if she were ready to cry. The spot in her heart seemed as if it had been finally filled.
They stayed there for quite some time before either of them would let go. Kagome hadn't told him exactly how much she had missed him, but she didn't care. As a matter of fact, all her cares in the world seemed so irrelevant at the moment, and she wished they would all go away.
Kagome was the first to pull away from the hug, a misty look still in her eyes, as if perhaps she thought she'd dreamt the past few minutes.She had yet to clear things up. common sense flowing through her body once more, she overcame her wishes for ridding herself of her cares, and took a deep breath, readying herself to continue.
"I'm sorry" Kagome sighed.
There was a long silence , The only things moving were the wildlife around them.
"I should have never left. It's all my fault all of this happened. I only left because I was afraid.." Kagome paused, the tree's seemed to stop flowing in the breeze and freeze completely, hanging on her every word as she spoke to the ground "I was afraid that you wouldn't want me around anymore, since we had no reason to be by eachother's side anymore. The jewel is gone and Kikyou isn't. So I fled this place...vowing to forget it all.. Deep down, I knew I couldn't, and deep down I still hoped that I could go back without any regrets.."
"So that's why you left?" Receiving a "Duh" look from Kagome, he took another breath to continue, but failed to do so. The words had escaped him "Kagome..."
The silence filled the area around them once more, before she had realized she'd been doing it, Kagome began to hum a sweet lulling tune softly under her breath. Her foot moved back and forth idly as she drew little pictures in the dirt on the ground with the toes of her shoes. This had gone so well, that Kagome had begun to think that perhaps avoiding the subject all together was the brightest of her choices and continued to do so.
She had reached the highest point of her tune, the suspense growing with each note. She had actually gotten so into it, that she'd been on the tip of her toes waiting for the next note herself.
"What are you doing?" A low voice pierced through the everlasting silence.
Kagome's heart did somersaults in her chest as she nearly yelled, the suspense in her own little tune fitting so well with the moment, she'd actually forgotten he was there. Half because of her backround music and half because of the startling sudden tone in his voice, she'd felt like someone and snuck up behind her and slapped in the back of the head.
"Enjoying yourself?" InuYasha fought back a grin, the slight curl in the sides of his lips still obvious.
"Yes!" Kagome snapped, feeling her cheeks redden. Feeling foolish, she could only imagine how she looked to someone who was watching her.
She turned to the opposite direction so she could silently laugh at herself in peace. Her usual empty frown had curled into a grin and her dull lifeless eyes had sparkled with the light of all the stars in the evening sky.
'So..this is what it's like to be truly happy?' Her mind questioned 'It seems so unfamiliar to me..perhaps this is my true "Therapy". As long as I'm here, I'm fighting back each moment that I'm destined to go insane.'
The colors in the sky seemed to be smeared endlessly acrossed it. Throwing her head back, Kagome looked straight upwards. She felt that the world could just tip at any moment and suck her up into the never ending abyss. Perhaps now she truly was insane..(the kids at home would be pleased to know that their accusations hadn't gone to waste)..but if insanity felt so good, perhaps it wasn't so bad after all..
A comforting hand placed itself on her shoulder. Looking over, she could see InuYasha gazing upon the setting sun. The moon was becoming ever more noticeable and the darkness seemed to roll in slowly. Kagome was determined to stay there by his side well after this point. It didn't matter. Since Insanity was indeed a good thing, cherishing it seemed to be the reasonable thing to do.
Her knees aching Kagome slowly brought herself to the ground, the hand and the Hanyou attached to it followed.
Knees curled comfortably beneath her, her head felt heavy and useless. Drooping to the side, she let it rest on InuYasha's shoulder. It seemed more comfortable than any pillow she'd ever imagined. Her eyelids began to give in to her exhaustion reluctantly, and began sliding shut.
She took one last look at the hopeful look in the hanyou's eyes as he watched the glowing moon, before her eyes closed completely and her mind drifted off into a peaceful slumber.
There, happy? At least it's not as bad as last time, I left you in a clean good ending rather than a nasty cliff hanger. Of course..still, it makes you wonder..doesn't it?