Story 1 of...I'm not sure yet.

Author's note: Here, I have written, to the best of my ability, a story of love, angst, and male pregnancy. The plot…well, there is no plot. The characters…hmm. But there us this really great sex scene that would turn Michael Jackson on (Check off my criteria box for "random Michael Jackson insult.")

(How Time Consuming.)

It was a dark an really rainy day cus that's the best way to introduce my story about Hairy Poter, whose name I will continue to misspell throughout this story. Omg, Heary Pooter was this like, really cool guy and he was even cooler than Josh Nickolson who plays quarterback on our school football team evn thoug he goes out with Jamie Holdson who is this lyk, big hor who slept with my boyfrind Tommy and that made me really really sad and I cried for days…

(Author goes to regain her composure. Readers apparently, do not care in the least)

…And Harri was so cool because he was this wizard, right? And so he had this cool stick that shot shit out of it…omg, not like that, LOL ROFL LMAO! But omg, he was so fucking hot because he was also Daniel Radcliff and he lived in this house with his uncle who was fat and his aunt who was mean and his cousin Dudley who was fat and mean and ...(Insert overused adjectives often associated with Dudley Dursley's name here.)

So omg, haray wanted to go to see his girlfriend-that-the-reader-is-not-familiar-with-and-whom-they-assume-is-a-mary-sue but his aunt and uncle said this which in my worthless opinion was so fucking mean:

"No."

So then hairay pawtah was like, so fucking sad and he didn't even get to go to his girlfriend's house and so then, for like, no apparent reason besides the fact that the author has to move the story along, he decided to kill himself and it was so sad.

But omg, draco, who conveniently renounced his pompous jackass ways, miraculously happened to barge in and he lyk saved harey and then the started to take each ohteras clothes of and then they fawked lyk animals and then they said they lovedd each other and thjens, they got maried and it was like, such a sweet thing, only they couldn't have kids cus they were men…

(Spell Check works furiously to catch up with each grammatical and spelling errors.)

…But then so miraculously, Draco became pregnant! Even though he was a man! Because that's what happens in male pregnancy fiction! Go figure!

And then like, 9 months later because I really don't know what happens in between that time frame cause I didn't get to take the sex ed class, draco pushed and he pushed and out poped a baby! And ti was really blonde and had hairy' s eyes and they named it Greg because that's the name of my new boyfriend at school to totally kicked my cheating boyfriend's ass in a fight and I laughed so fucking hard my sides, like…ached!!!!!!LMAO! Omg, it was so funny u shoulda been there…

(The reader feel their IQ drop about 20 points during this time.)

...And then …

(Author doesn't update for a long while because she is grounded from the computer for failing English class, ironically enough.)

...Greg grew up and Haiey and draco died lyk, a looooong time ago because I never got to include this previously in the plot and then, I made a sequel!!!!!! And now the story is about greg! OMFG!LMAOROFL!!!!

…

OMG!

The end