Chapter 5: Next morning
A/N: Hey guys! I'm so terrible sorry that it took me soooo long for this last chapter to post. I had a lot of stress and a few personal problems that bothered me. I want to thank everyone who reviewed, it really meant much to me. And here's finally the final chapter. It's not beta read because my beta reader has problems with her pc, so sorry about my mistakes. I hope you like it and please review! Thanks
Logan was in the Danger room and talked to a few students when she came in. He turned his attention to her at once, just as usually he forgot everything as soon as she entered his mind. Usually she smiled brightly at him, sending his heart to his toes. But not today, he looked at her worried and noticed her swollen eyes and her face that was deathly white. He stared at her but she just went past him, her eyes turned to the floor.
His worry changed into deep confusion. What was going on? What did he do? Was she made because he'd danced with Claire? But before he could open his mouth to ask her that, a student put his hand up and asked him when the lesson would start. He swallowed and decided that it would be the best to let it rest until later.
He started the lesson, explained something about a new defence they would learn today but as much as he tried to concentrate, his mind was with Marie. He just couldn't understand why she would be mad at him. It was not like he was together with Claire, well she was a nice and pretty woman but she wasn't.. well she wasn't Marie. And anyway why should Marie care about this? She'd seemed happy with John last night, she'd never left his side and later they had disappeared and hadn't returned either. Thinking about it made his stomach twist, he didn't want to imagine what had happened between these two while they had been gone. Even if he knew that John wasn't able to give her more than a simple kiss, even that almost ripped his heart into pieces.
He sighed, he knew that he would have to talk to her later. But not just about what bothered her but about everything, about themselves and what they felt for each other. He realized that they had avoided it for too long. He looked up and his sight fell upon her. And suddenly he realized that something was wrong, terrible wrong. She fought against her invisible enemy just like the other students, but her face got paler with each punch in the air and she gritted her teeth every time she tried to move.
"Okay, guys. Short break for everyone", he yelled and his students stopped abruptly and stared at him confused. He used to be as hard as flint while teaching self-defence. Break was a word he refused to say. But then they shrugged their shoulders, glad about his mercy.
But Rogue didn't stop, she continued on fighting against her imaginary enemy. Sweat ran over her face, burning in her eyes. She felt tears welling up in her eyes but the rage made her going on. She was so angry.. at Logan and Claire, at John and mostly at herself. But suddenly someone grabbed her wrist and stopped her. She looked up to see in Logan's worried face.
"Marie.. are you alright"?
"I'm fine", she said and smiled brightly, although the pain in her side made her dizzy. She didn't want Logan to see her suffer. Not while he probably was happier than ever with his beloved Claire. She didn't want to bother him with her little unimportant problems.
But of course he didn't believe her. He shook his head, and she shivered when he softly grabbed her arm to pull her closer. She looked up and his eyes were full of deep worry. "Stop lying. What's wrong.. are you hurt"?
The softness in his voice made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside even if she didn't want it to, the way he looked at her with these big concerned eyes and the way he gently touched her was too much for her. Suddenly she couldn't take it any longer and she sank to her knees. Logan wrapped his arm around her to prevent her from falling down the floor. She groaned and sank against his chest.
It didn't matter to her anymore what was going on between him and Claire, that he didn't love her back or that her own boyfriend had beaten her up. The pain was all that mattered to her at the moment and she wanted it to stop. God how much she wanted this all to stop, this deep love she felt for Logan, the shame she felt for being such a stupid person and the fear of being lonely, of being left alone.
"It's hurts", she whimpered and he looked at her in fear."Where.. tell me where it hurts", he said softly and the students stepped closer, surprised by the softness in their teacher's voice. A softness that neither of them had ever heard.
She pointed at her side and he nodded. She closed her eyes when she felt him lifting her shirt carefully. She knew exactly how he would react. She had been shocked as well as she had seen it in the morning. It really looked bad.
He saw the dark swollen area and gasped as well as the students around them. He didn't need to be a doctor to know that her ribs were broken. He put the shirt down again, fought down a growl full of hatred and rage and carefully pulled her up to her feet. His heart hammered in his chest. He was frantic, the thoughts whirled around in his mind but he knew that he had to stay calm. Questions appeared in his head. What had happened? Why hadn't she come to him at once when it happened? He saw that these injuries were older than a few hours. But he knew he couldn't ask her all this with the students standing around them.
"Can you walk darling"? She nodded and gritted her teeth, took a step but then her knees gave in again and he picked her up without hesitation.
He took a look at the shocked students. "Bobby.. I want you to take over the lesson. Keep on doing your exercises and behave yourselves", he said in his usual gruff and harsh voice but when he saw the worried faces of his young students he quickly added: "She'll be just fine".
Bobby nodded quickly and Logan made his way out of the room. Her head leaned against his chest and she moaned.
"It hurts Logan. Make it stop", she whimpered and she didn't mean just the pain her broken rips caused her. Her soft moaning let him run to the med lab even faster. "Hold on a second darling. Jean's going to give you something against the pain", he said.
She looked at him. There it was again, this word 'darling' that sent a warm feeling through her stomach. For a moment she forgot about the pain and the fear she felt and allowed herself to enjoy being in his arms. God, he made her crazy. And she knew that he would ask questions, and she knew he would find out who had done this to her. But that didn't matter anymore, she wanted to rest... just for a while. She wanted to shut her eyes, to shut everyone out... even Logan. Especially Logan. She wanted the numbness to set in and when they almost arrived the elevator she felt the warm darkness coming over her and she welcomed it. The last thing she saw were his worried eyes which looked down at her and then she slipped away.
A few hours later:
Logan wandered around the room, trying to cool down his tempter. Jean and Storm watched him with adequate distance, they didn't dare to step in his way. He was too enraged. He swore, stopped, started to walk again, swore again and from time to time he hit his fist against the wall.
Scott sat beside Rogue, who laid in a med lab bed motionless and watched him unnerved. "Would you stop that?"
Logan glared at him and stopped in the middle of the room. "Shut up One-Eye. It is your damn fault that happened. Why did you allow here to date this asshole? You should have known that something is wrong"; he swore quietly not wanting to wake her up.
Scott stood up, flushed. "Really? Well, you've been here for 6 weeks and haven't stopped her either. Plus you knew that he hit her before, so you're the one to blame", he replied angry.
Storm held up her hands. "Stop it boys. It's no one's fault, so stop blaming yourself. You're going to wake her up with your nonsense", she whispered and looked at them firmly.
Jean looked at the pale girl and sighed. "I'm afraid that it doesn't matter how loud you are. I don't think that's going to wake her up", she said.
Logan stopped at once and whirled around, as well as Scott and Storm. "What do you mean? You said she would be fine, as soon as she would wake up. Why shouldn't she wake up? You said she is just sleeping", he yelled loudly and he feared his heart could might explore.
Scott stood up and went up to his girlfriend. "Jean? She has a few broken ribs, a concussion and a lot of cuts and bruises, right? But that's not bad enough to fall into a coma, is it"? His voice was full of worry as well. Rogue was more than just a usual student for him. She was special and she meant so much to him.
Jean sighed. "Calm down. All I wanted to say is that she won't wake until she wants to. We can't force her to do so, she has to regain conscious herself. But at the moment it seems to me she doesn't want t wake up, she doesn't want to face this all, or us", she said and looked over to Logan who stared at her with wide open eyes.
"I'm her best friend! She used to trust me more than anybody else, she told me everything, she always came to me for help. Why would she shut me out this time? Why should she hide her feeling from me?"
Storm smiled slightly, even if it wasn't an happy smile. "Maybe she doesn't want to share her feelings with you because these feelings are about you. And maybe she fears that the feeling that you're feeling in the moment when you think about her aren't the same she feels when she looks at you", she softly said and Logan looked at her.
"Why should you know what she feels", he growled at her, knowing that it wasn't fair to be at angry at Storm.
"You're not the only friend she has Logan", she replied and Jean nodded. She knew as well about it. When Rogue realized that Jean wasn't in love with Logan and that Logan had forgotten about her, she slowly began to talk to Jean about a few things. Especially about Logan. And even if she never really spoke it out, Jean and Storm didn't need to read her mind to know what she felt for Logan.
And suddenly Rogue began to move. Logan was by her side at once, trying to forget for a moment what Storm and Jean had tried to tell him and when she opened her eyes and his bearded face was the first thing she saw.
"Hey darling.. how're you feeling"? He asked and the rage that had filled his eyes before was replaced by deep worry. He softly caressed her cheek, not caring about the fact that her mutation could kick in every second. God, her skin was so soft and warm and it made him sick to see that someone had been able to destroy something that beautiful.
She smiled slightly by his expression and then she nodded slowly. "I'm okay", she answered and they all breathed a sigh of relief. Then she grabbed his hand and removed it from her bare skin. "Stop it, or I'm going to hurt you", she said.
He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't care".
Jean appeared by their sides. "Okay, Rogue. I need to check on you, to see how you're doing. It's not as bad as it probably felt, a few broken ribs that will heal in a few weeks. Do you want to tell us what happened"?
She turned her head and stared at the wall. She had known that deciding to wake up was wrong, she had known that these question she didn't want to answer would be asked. No, she didn't want to talk about it. She was so ashamed, for being so stupid, for letting John hurt her like that, for ever thinking he would truly love her.
Logan understood her and she didn't even had to say a single thing. He took her glove hand in his own and smiled. "You couldn't tell that he would react like that, Marie. No one was prepared for him being an lunatic. It's not your fault, alright?"
She sighed deeply and then she smiled at him lovingly. God, how much she loved him for this, for understanding her, for comforting her like this. But still, there was John, there was Logan and unanswered question what he felt for her and if he would run again. "Thank you Logan", she just whispered. Those questions would be answered later, so she hoped.
Then she looked at Jean, Scott and Storm. "How did you know that it was John? How could you tell that I didn't fall off my bed or something like tat"?
They cleared their throats uncomfortable and Scott was the only one to speak. "Well, I guess we weren't that unprepared for him to react like that after all. We couldn't stand him but we feared to tell you because you seemed so happy. And last night, he acted really strange. The way he ordered you around, and the way his eyes shone with pure hate whenever a boy looked at you. It was weird but we still didn't say anything. I'm really sorry about that Rogue, we should have protected you from him. But we failed", he said and sighed.
She shook her head quickly. "No, it's not your fault. You guys were so great. Bu I was stupid, I was blind. I didn't want to see why he did what he did and I always forgave me, although Logan told me to break up with him. But I feared to do so because..", she stated and then trailed off when she saw Logan looking at her.
"Why? Why were you afraid to leave him?" He asked but she didn't answer. He turned around and signalised the others to leave them alone for a while. They quickly understood and moved out of the room.
"Tell us if you need something", Storm said and Rogue smiled weakly.
Logan turned back to her and sighed. "Marie... please tell me why you didn't break up with him. Why don't you trust me, darling? What happened that you stopped trusting me?" he asked.
She stared at him. What was she to tell him? She could tell him that she was scared that John wouldn't let her leave him but that was a lie and he would realize that as soon. So decided to tell him the truth although she feared to do so.
"I.. I was afraid to be alone, Logan. John was the only one who loved me, the only who accepted me even with my mutation. He cared for me and I thought that I if I would lose him then I would lose everything. After you were gone, things became awful. I felt so lonely and alone. And after I broke up with Bobby I had no one to go, no one to speak to. And then came John and I was so happy that I tried to ignore his strange and sometimes violent behaviour. I cant stand to be alone again, Logan, I .. I think I would lose myself in the nothingness", she broke off and looked away, not daring to look in his eyes. She feared to see pity in them and that would make her crazy.
He wasn't able to move, he just stared at her. It was all his fault, he'd done that. He'd left her alone and with that he had rushed her into her own misfortune. He again took her hand in his although he didn't know if she would allow him.
"I.. I'm so sorry Marie. More than you can imagine. But.. but why didn't you break up with him after I came home? I thought you know that I would, never leave you alone, I said that I would stay, didn't I"? While saying that he realized suddenly that it was a lie. He had already left her a few times and he'd never told her that he would stay, he had never told her about the decision he once had made at the gate. He hadn't realized that every time she looked at him she feared that he could pack his things and leave her alone again.
She sighed, she saw it in his eyes when he realized what she had felt over the past few months. But she decided to let it rest and answer his question instead.. "But.. but when I decided to break up with him I saw you and Claire and.. and I was afraid to lose you again to her. She so much better than I am. She's beautiful, intelligent and loved by everyone and I'm just..", he cut her off before she could say anything more.
"Stop it! Marie.. You're the most beautiful woman I know, you're intelligent as well, you do understand me, you the only one I trust, you the only one I need. And I want you to know and never forget that", he yelled.
She sat up, forgetting about the pain and wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you Logan".
He wrapped his arms around her and sighed. He softly caressed her back and rested his chin on her head. God, how much he had missed to hold her like that. And suddenly out of the blue, he began to smile when these confusing feelings he had felt for such a long time now started to make sense to him. All these question inside his mind that wouldn't leave him alone, were answered at once. But before he could open the mouth she spoke.
She looked at him and decided that now was the right moment, the moment for which she had waited for so long. "I love you", she whispered softly and held her breath while waiting for his response.
But suddenly she felt him stiffened in her arms. Her eyes widened thinking that he hadn't been prepared for this. And then pure panic flooded through her when she realized that she would scare him away with that. He would run again, just like he'd done a few years ago when he noticed that their relationship was too close. But this time it was different, this time she couldn't lose him again, she couldn't stand to be without him.
She grabbed his hand and turned him to herself. "Logan! Please, I'm sorry.. I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you off. Please don't go away, don't run..don't leave me alone here. I wouldn't survive that", she sobbed and stared at him full fear.
He looked at her confused. What the hell was she talking about? But he was too tired to ask, all these terrible and exhausting days had been too much and now he just wanted to rest. So he just wrapped his arms around her to show her what he meant. "I'm not going anywhere Marie. I swear.. I swear that I'll stick with you for the rest of my life. I won't leave you ever again", he said and stroke her back to comfort her. And he meant what he said, forgotten all these confusing question that had whirled around his mind for so long. Everything he had searched for for so long was right in front of him.
After she had calmed down and whipped her tears away, she smile slightly. God, now he knew that she loved him, that was so embarrassing. Would they be able to go back to normal, to their friendship that meant so much to her?. Or would this change everything between them, would she ever be able to look in his eyes again?
But then he smiled as well and said those three little words that made her luck complete, that sent her heart to heaven, that made her the happiest woman in the world.
"I love you", he whispered quietly and before he could stop himself he kissed her softly.
Forgotten was John and all the pain, all the fear both of them had felt. Logan knew that it was just right, the Professor had been right all the time. And he was so damn glad that he'd decided to stay and that he didn't run around at the gate. They both knew that there still was a lot to deal with but it didn't matter anymore. They loved each other.
The end
A/N: Okay, I know this ends sucks but I'm not good at finishing my fics. I hope you liked it a bit anyway. Review and I promise... I'll be back g