Afterlife Idol Chapter 3: 3,3,3!, a harry potter fanfic

A/N: Here it is! Chapter three!

Rating: PG-13, for ideas, innuendos and words.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Alright?

Ch. 3

The next morning was chaos. Complete Chaos. No one could find anything they needed for their song, nor could many of them remember their song. It was amazing that they were even remotely ready when Dumbledore knocked upon the door to take them to the stage.

Each contestant had a bag with his or her costume or props that they were going to use. No one spoke so as to conserve his or her voices. It was a rather solemn looking group. You'd think Albus was walking them down the green mile instead of to a stage with thousands of screaming souls. He tried to calm the nerves of each one, but he only succeeded in making them worse. He was thankful to leave them backstage and get out there to start the show.

"Hello! And Welcome back to Afterlife Idol! Today's the very first round of this competition and I'm sure you're all excited to see these talented people get up here sweat! Before we commence with the singing, let's bring out the Judges and hear what they think will happen today." The crowed cheered and clapped as the three Judges, Voldemort, Umbridge and Michael came out onto the stage and took their seats.

"As you can see, our audience is very thrilled. How do you feel about today?" Dumbledore asked the Judges, taking a seat on his stool with a smile. Umbridge was the first to speak, with her sugar smile,

"I'm rather excited to hear our contestants for the first time and can't wait to critique them to help them get better!' The crowd laughed and Albus nodded,

"No doubt you are. What about you, Lord Voldemort?" He asked.

"Let's just get this madness over with." He was booed but he didn't care, just scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Michael?"

"Well, I'm psyched to be here and ready to help the next generation of performers make their way on the road to stardom." He said in his soft voice, and he did what looked like a smile, but no one can be too sure.

"I guess that means it's time to get our first act out here!" The audience cheered and Albus silenced them, "First up, we have Ginny Weasley, performing 'Get the Party Started'!"

The lights went out and the music started. Ginny came out in a black tube-top and baggy pants, they both complemented her hair, which was in a high ponytail with wild streaks. She had a microphone and her energy was high.

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

On a Saturday night

Everybody's waitin'

For me to arrive

Sendin' out the message

To all of my friends

We'll be lookin' flashy

In my Mercedes Benz

I got lotsa style

Got my gold diamond rings

I can go for miles

If you know

What I mean

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

Pumpin' up the volume

Breakin' down to the beat

Cruisin' through the west side

We'll be checkin' the scene

Boulevard is freakin'

As I'm comin' up fast

I'll be burnin' rubber

You'll be kissin' my ass

Pull up to the bumper

Get out of the car

License plate says

Stunner #1 Superstar

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

Makin' my connection

As I enter the room

Everybody's chillin' as

I set up the groove

Pumpin' up the volume

With this brand new beat

Everybody's dancin' and

They're dancin' for me

I'm your operator

You can call anytime

I'll be your connection

To the party line

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

I'm comin' up

So you better you better

Get this party started

Get this part started right now

Get this party started

Get this party started right now!

The audience cheered her for about a minute and she bowed then went over to the Judges, it was nerve wracking to be the first act, you set the standard for the rest. Umbridge went first,

"Your energy was great, Ginny dear. But I don't think you quite had the sense of the song. I would've made sure that I was in the proper mindset for a party, you seemed to, well, sexy, for this kind of song." Ginny gave the audience a glance, trying to fight back a laugh. Umbridge sat back and Voldemort just glared,

"You were horrible. That was a terrible song and you look hideous." He continued to glare at her, she just shrugged. Michael nodded a bit,

"Nice song for your personality. You really seemed to get the energy. I am worried about your image though, you might want to tone things down for your next piece. Not that you don't look great, but you don't want to be too strong too soon. You get me?" She nodded and smiled. The crowd cheered her once more and she left the stage. Albus took center once more too announce the next act,

"Here we go with Cho Chang singing 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun'!!"

Cho came out onto the stage and they cheered. She had on a black glow in the dark body suit and glowsticks everywhere.

I come home in the morning light

My mother says when you gonna live your life right

Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones

And girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun

The phone rings in the middle of the night

My father yells what you gonna do with your life

Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one

But girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have -

That's all they really want

Some fun

When the working day is done

Girls - they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun

Some boys take a beautiful girl

And hide her away from the rest of the world

I want to be the one to walk in the sun

Oh girls they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have

That's all they really want

Some fun

When the working day is done

Girls - they want to have fun

Oh girls just want to have fun,

They want to have fun,

They want to have fun....

She bowed and the audience clapped she was slightly out of breath as she turned to the Judges.

Umbridge looked slightly annoyed, or was that constipation?

"You just don't have what it takes..." Voldemort scowled,

"Please leave now." Michael gave her a long look,

"I think you have the right idea, but maybe try something a little more low key. The glow in the dark thing was cute, but not with this song. It's too well known." She nodded and left. Albus reappeared,

"Now we have our first guy, Fred Weasley, performing 'Flavor of the Week!" Applause erupted as he took the stage, his hair was scruffy and his clothes obscured. Enough to make any girl go absolutely mad with desire. The music started and he blew them all away.

She paints her nails and she don't know,

He's got her best friend on the phone.

She'll wash her hair, his dirty clothes,

Or all he gives to her.

And he's got posters on the wall

Of all the girls he wished she was.

And he means everything to her.

Her boyfriend,

He don't know

Anything

About her.

He's too stoned,

Nintendo.

I wish that I could make her see,

She's just the flavor of the week.

It's Friday night and she's all alone,

He's a million miles away.

She's dressed to kill, but the TV's on,

He's connected to the sound.

And he's got pictures on the wall

Of all the girls he's loved before,

And she knows all his favorite songs.

Her boyfriend,

He don't know

Anything

About her.

He's too stoned,

Nintendo.

I wish that I could make her see,

She's just the flavor of the week.

Yeah.

Her boyfriend,

He don't know

Anything

About her.

He's too stoned,

He's too stoned.

Her boyfriend,

He don't know

Anything

About her.

He's too stoned,

Nintendo.

I wish that I could make her see,

She's just the flavor of the week.

Yeah she's the flavor of the week.

She makes me week.

Fred bowed to his fangirls and turned to the Judges, who looked thoroughly entertained. Well, not Voldemort. Umbridge gave him a special clap,

"I am very impressed. I think we can expect great things from you!"

Voldemort sighed and glared at him,

"Cut your hair. Wear clothes that fit, and do us a favor and don't sing every again." Michael did his little head nod before speaking once more,

"I like it. The look, the sound, it really works for you. You picked a good starting song. Let's see how well you'll do in the next round."

Fred thanked them, blew a kiss to his girls and left the stage. Albus came back on,

"Well, I think we're off to a great start! What do you think?" The crowd cheered and he grinned, "Perfectly put. Now let's continue! Next up we have Mr. Sirius Black with 'I wanna be Sedated'!" If Fred was hot, it was nothing compared to the blood-traitor. His hair tousled in just the perfect way, black slacks, white button-up shirt, only done halfway and an undone tie. The music started and the crowd died.

Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I wanna be sedated

Nothing to do Nowhere to go I wanna be sedated

Just get me to the airport And put me in a plane

Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane I can't control my fingers

I can't control my brain Oh no oh ho

Just put me in a wheelchair And get me to the show

Hurry hurry hurry before I go loco I can't control my fingers

I can't control my toes Oh no oh ho

Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go I wanna be sedated

Nothing to do Nowhere to go I wanna be sedated

Just get me to the airport And put me in a plane

Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane I can't control my fingers

I can't control my brain Oh no oh ho

Just put me in a wheelchair And get me to the show

Hurry hurry hurry before I go loco I can't control my fingers

I can't control my toes Oh no oh ho

He finished the song, winked at a lucky girl in the front row, gave a bow and proceeded to the Judges. Who were just as impressed.

"Well Mr. Black, you certainly aren't anything like you record states. I mean, who would believe that his man was in Azkaban for mass murder?" Umbridge was booed and even had to dodge a hex from a rabid fangirl named Nicole. Sirius gave her a smile and she fainted.

Voldemort looked borely,

"This is the one said to be my right hand? I certainly would be in a sorry state if that were true. You're the best so far, but you're still bad."

Michael managed an actual smile, one that was recogniseable.

"Well done. Well done. You're certainly going to be some competition. If you don't win it here, give me a call and I'll hook you up. You have the energy and persona I like." Sirius took the slip of paper Michael handed him and thanked him. With a bow, he too left the stage.

Dumbledore reappeared and looked quite blown away,

"We're going to hear a word from our sponsers now, so don't go away, we'll be right back with the next four contestants!" The lights dimmed and the audience applauded. A voice was amplified over the invisible speakers, it was a spokesperson for the Hell's Angels, one of the prominate Quidditch Teams in the Afterlife.

"You've seen the games, witnessed the brilliance. Now you can take home the excitement of a Hell's Angels game in the luxury of your very own cloud, or firey pit. That's right, on sale as we speak are every game the Angel's have played. You don't want to miss out on this spectacular opportunity to own part of Quidditch History. Available where ever things are sold. All rights reserved. Limitations may apple. Yada yada yada. Now Back to Afterlife Idol!"

The lights came back up on the stage and the crowd was met by Dumbledore as usual,

"Now our next act is Severus Snape with 'Satisfaction'!" Bewildered, the crowd clapped as he took his place. In all black as usual and his hair looked rather greasy, his pale skin looked transparent under the light. He began, no energy, no pizzazz, nothing but his voice.

I can't get no satisfaction

I can't get no satisfaction

'Cause I try and I try and I try and I try

I can't get no, I can't get no

When I'm drivin' in my car

And that man comes on the radio

He's tellin' me more and more

About some useless information

Supposed to fire my imagination

I can't get no, oh no no no

Hey hey hey, that's what I say

I can't get no satisfaction

'Cause I try and I try and I try and I try

I can't get no, I can't get no

When I'm watchin' my TV

And that man comes on to tell me

How white my shirts can be

But he can't be a man 'cause he doesn't smoke

The same cigarrettes as me

I can't get no, oh no no no

Hey hey hey, that's what I say

I can't get no satisfaction

I can't get no girl reaction

'Cause I try and I try and I try and I try

I can't get no, I can't get no

When I'm ridin' round the world

And I'm doin' this and I'm signing that

And I'm tryin' to make some girl

Who tells me baby better come back later next week

'Cause you see I'm on losing streak

I can't get no, oh no no no

Hey hey hey, that's what I say

I can't get no, I can't get no

I can't get no satisfaction

No satisfaction, no satisfaction, no satisfaction

He finished, to which they were very glad and he didn't bow or acknowledge anything, merely waited for his critique.

Umbridge sniffled and let out a sigh,

"I wanted more, Severus." She said looking rather disdainful.

"What the bloody fuck are you doing here? You were a terrible spy as a mortal and you're no better in the afterlife. Get out of my sight." Voldemort bellowed. Snape didn't even flinch.

"Severus, right? Do you want to be here? If not, continue this way, but next time, let's see some energy at least." Snape bid them goodbye and left the stage, not a sound in the crowd.

"Well now. That left a lot to be desired." Dumbledore said, looking off after Snape,

"Moving right along. Next and hopefully the one to pull us out of this slump, is Miss Lily Evans with 'Don't Say You Love Me'!"

Lily walked onto the stage and was cheered, she smiled out at them and started into her song.

Got introduced to you by a friend

You were cute and all that

Baby you set the trend, yes you did oh

The next thing I know we're down at the cinema

We're sitting there, you start kissing me

What's that about?

You're moving too fast, I don't understand you

I'm not ready yet, baby I can't pretend

No I can't

The best I can do is tell you to talk to me

It's possible, eventual

Love will find a way

Love will find a way...

Don't say you love me

You don't even know me

If you really want me

Then give me some time

Don't go there baby

Not before I'm ready

Don't say your heart's in a hurry

It's not like we're gonna get married

Give me, give me some time

Here's how I play, here's where you stand

Here's what to prove to get any further than where it's been

I'll make it clear, not gonna tell you twice

Take it slow, you keep pushing me

You're pushing me away

Pushing me away...

Don't say you love me

You don't even know me

If you really want me

Then give me some time

Don't go there baby

Not before I'm ready

Don't say your heart's in a hurry

It's not like we're gonna get married

Give me, give me some time

Don't say you love me

You don't even know me baby

Baby don't say you love me, baby

Give me some time...

Don't say you love me

You don't even know me

If you really want me

Then give me some time

Don't go there baby

Not before I'm ready

Don't say your heart's in a hurry

It's not like we're gonna get married

Give me, give me some time

They cheered her and she gave them a bow, then eagerly went over to the Judges. Umbridge smiled at her,

"Very nice, my dear." Was all she said. Very helpful.

Voldemort felt the need to curse her, but since he couldn't kill anyone, it wasn't worth the effort.

"Must you give me a reason to kill you in this life, Lily?" He asked and she just shrugged. Not like he could do anything to her. She being dead and everything.

Michael gave her a thumbs up, but not much else. She waved and left. The lights dimmed once more, another sponsor to make an announcement.

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Dumbledore was onstage as the lights came back up, he had a knowing smile on his face,

"Here we are, ready to start the next group. So without further ado, let's bring out Luna Lovegood who'll be performing 'You Drive Me Crazy'!"

Miss Lovegood smiled at Dumbledore as she took her place. She was in a pleated skirt and knee-high boots. She had on a white shirt and look looked like a catholic schoolgirl. For the sick old guys in the audience, it was a dream come true.

Baby, I'm so into you

You got that somethin, what can I do

Baby, you spin me around

The Earth is movin, but I can't feel the ground

Every time you look at me

My heart is jumpin, it's easy to see

You drive me crazy

I just cant sleep

Im so excited, I'm in too deep

Ohh...crazy, but it feels alright

Baby, thinkin of you keeps me up all night

Tell Me, you're so into me

That i'm the only one you will see

Tell me, i'm not in the blue

That i'm not wastin, my feelings on you

You drive me crazy

I just cant sleep

Im so excited, I'm in too deep

Ohh...crazy, but it feels alright

Baby, thinkin of you keeps me up all night

Crazy, I just can't sleep

I'm so excited, I'm in too deep

Crazy, But it feels alright

Every Day and Every Night

You drive me crazy

I just cant sleep

Im so excited, I'm in too deep

Ohh...crazy, but it feels alright

Baby, thinkin of you keeps me up all night

You Drive Me Crazy (You drive me crazy baby)

Ohh..Crazy, But It Feels Alright

Baby Thinkin of you keeps me up all night

They applauded her and she couldn't help but grin. Of course, no one really knew why. Odd choice for an opening song, but she didn't to a terrible job. Maybe it was the shock of seeing someone like her doing such a stereotypical song. Who knew.

Umbridge tsked a few times before speaking,

"You're too weird for something like that. Stick to your kind my dear." Voldemort raised an eyebrow at her but didn't comment, instead he just sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Please. Someone get me some Excedrin." Michael leaned forward and looked at her,

"Your voice is good. The song is bad. Try something a little more different next time."

Luna smiled and left the stage. Dumbledore once more greeted the audience,

"Now we have James Potter, who'll charm us with 'All Star'!" The Fangirl section went wild, just as with Sirius and Fred before him. I mean, what can I say? These boys were cute! He was in a pair of denim pants and loose shirt, comfy and Jameies.

Somebody once told me the world's was gonna roll me,

I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed.

Well she was lookin' kinda dumb with her finger in her thumb in the shape of an L on her forehead......

Well the years start comin' and they don't stop comin',

back to the rules and I hit the ground runnin'.

didn't make sense not to live for fun,

your brain gets smart, but your head gets dumb.

So much to do so much to see,

so whats wrong with takin the backstreets.

you'll never know if you don't goi,

you'll never shine if you dont glow...

Hey now your an allstar,

get your ganme on go play.

Hey now your a rockstar get your show on get paid.

(and all that glitter is gold)

Only shooting stars break the mold.

Its a cool place and they say it gets colder,

your bundled up now, wait till' ya get older.

But the media man makes the differ'

judging by the hole in the satelitte picture.

The ice we skate is gettin pretty thin,

the waters' gettin' warm you might as well swim.

My world's on fire, howabout' yours.

thats the way I like it cause i'lll never get board......

Hey now your an allstar,

get your ganme on go play.

Hey now your a rockstar get your show on get paid.

(and all that glitter is gold)

Only shooting stars break the mold.

(Music in between verses...)

Hey now your an allstar

get your game on go play,

hey now your a rockstar, get your show on get paid.

(and all that glitter is gold)

only shooting stars....

Somebody once asked

could I spare some change for gas

i need to get myself away from this place.

I said yep, whatta' concept,

i could use a little fuel myself

and we could all use a little change......

Well, the years start comin'

and they don't stop comin'.

Back to the rules and I hit the ground runnin',

it didn't make sense not to live for fun,

your brain gets smart, but your head gets done,

so much to do, so much to see,

so whats wrong with takin' the backstreets.

You'lll never know if you don't go(GO!),

you'll never shine if you don't glow....

Hey now your an allstar,

get your ganme on go play.

Hey now your a rockstar get your show on get paid.

(and all that glitter is gold)

Only shooting stars break the mold.

(and all that glitter is gold) only shooting stars break the mold, (and all that glitter is gold) only shooting stars break the mold!

He bowed as the music stopped and waved to his fainting flock of fangirls. Pretty Alliteration! The Judges motioned him over because he had rather enjoyed the response. Umbridge looked at him as though she wanted a Percy or Filch, but got him instead.

"I don't quite agree with your song choice, but your voice is good." She sniffed and Voldemort turned green, apparently loathing carries on into the other world.

"If I could kill you again. I would." James gave him a wink, and both Michael and Dolores had to hold him back from attacking the soul named James. Michael merely said "Cool." James shrugged, winked to the fangirls and left the stage. Dumbledore waved as the lights went down once more.

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Damn these sponsors certainly were windbags. Anyway, we're back to the next part of our game!

Dumbledore actually ran onto the stage. I guess being dead gives you back your old spunk,

"Hey there! I've just been talking with a few of our contestants to come and you're in for a real treat. So here you are, Rachel Kerrington with 'Love is a Battlefield'!" She came onto the stage, a camo skirt and tube top, combat boots and her hair was pin straight.

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love Is A Battlefield

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love Is A Battlefield

You're beggin' me to go, you're makin' me stay

Why do you hurt me so bad?

It would help me to know

Do I stand in your way, or am I the best thing you've had?

Believe me, believe me, I can't tell you why

But I'm trapped by your love, and I'm chained to your side

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love Is A Battlefield

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love Is A Battlefield

We're losing control

Will you turn me away or touch me deep inside?

And before this gets old, will it still feel the same?

There's no way this will die

But if we get much closer, I could lose control

And if your heart surrenders, you'll need me to hold

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love Is A Battlefield

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love Is A Battlefield

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love Is A Battlefield

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love Is A Battlefield

They loved her. Not only was the performance simple enough for the look to work, her voice gave a new depth to the song. She got quite a few catcalls from some guys in the audience and she shined. Blowing them all kisses she went over to the Judges.

Umbridge sniffed slightly and looked reprovingly at her,
"I'm sorry. That just wasn't very good." Rachel scoffed at her, and the crowd agreed. Voldemort had gotten his Excedrin it seemed and just looked at her,

"I hate that song." Which from him was the closest thing to a compliment one would get.

"You would give Pat a run for her money my dear." Michael said with a grin, "I hope you grow upon this. You gonna be kickass in the end, I know." She smiled and winked and left. Albus came back on grinning as usual,

"Well let's see if our next act will top that! Please Welcome Draco Malfoy with" He was just as sexy as usual and the girls went wild. It was obvious these boys would stick around for a while, even if only for their looks.

I will dedicate and sacrifice my everything for just a seconds worth of how my story's ending.

And I wish I could know if the directions that I take and all the choices that I make won't end up all for nothing.

Show me what it's for.

Make me understand it.

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

Is there something more than what I've been handed?

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

Help me carry on.

Assure me it's ok to use my heart and not my eyes to navigate the darkness.

Will the ending be ever coming suddenly?

Will I ever get to see the ending to my story?

Show me what it's for.

Make me understand it.

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

Is there something more than what I've been handed?

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

So when and how will I know?..

How much further do I have to go?

How much longer until I finally know? Because I'm looking and I just can't see what's in front of me, in front of me!

Show me what it's for.

Make me understand it.

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

Is there something more than what I've been handed?

I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer.

He nodded and turned to the Judges, who seemed slightly uncomfortable. Maybe it was the fact that Draco looked just like Lucifer that they were afraid to anger him. Umbridge nodded and said 'Nice job."

Voldemort sighed, "I'm afraid we'll see more of you." And Michael eyed him rather oddly, or so it seemed, "Haven't I seen you before?"

Draco just scoffed and left the stage. That was helpful. "Next up is Ron Weasley with 'I Want You'!" Came Albus' voice.

He resembled Fred with his hair, only Ron's was shorter and more messy. He was formal, but relaxed in his attire and his eyes shined.

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes

And I am taken to a place

Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings

Take up shelter in the base of my spine

Sweet like a chica cherry cola

I don't need to try to explain

I just hold on tight and If it happens again

I may move so slightly to the arms

And the lips and the face

Of The Human Cannonball that

I need to I want to...

Come stand a little bit closer

Breathe in and get a bit higher

You'll never know what hit you when

I get to you

Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but

Ooh I'd die to find out

Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but

Ooh I'd die to find out

I'm the kind of person who endorses a deep commitment

Getting comfy getting perfect is what I live for

But a look and then a smell of perfume

It's like I'm down on the floor

And I Don't know what I'm in for

Conversation has a time and place in the interaction

Of a lover and a mate but the time of talking

Using symbols, using words can be likened

To a deep sea diver who is swimming with a raincoat

Come stand a little bit closer

Breathe in and get a bit higher

You'll never know what hit you when

I get to you

Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but

Ooh I'd die to find out

Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but

Ooh I'd die to find out

Ooh, ahh...

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes

And I am taken to a place

Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings

Take up shelter in the base of my spine

Sweet like a chica cherry cola

I don't need to try to explain

I just hold on tight and If it happens again

I may move so slightly to the arms

And the lips and the face

Of The Human Cannonball that

I need to I want to...

They cheered him and his ears went pink as he sheepishly went to the Judges,

"That was very nice Dear." Dolores said.

"We have an endless supply of red hair and weasels." Voldemort stated and Michael gave him a thumbs up. Ron left the stage to be replaced once more by the tedious Dumbledore,
"Now we have our favorite Lycanthrope, Remus Lupin, with a rather ironic song, 'Hungry Like the Wolf'!" His response was better than Lucius or Snape's, but it wasn't quite up to par with Sirius or Fred.

Dark in the city night is a wire

Steam in the subway earth is afire

Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

Woman you want me give me a sign

And catch my breathing even closer behind

Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

In touch with the ground

I'm on the hunt I'm after you

Smell like I sound I'm lost in a crowd.

And I'm hungry like the wolf.

Straddle the line in discord and rhyme

I'm on the hunt I'm after you.

Mouth is alive with juices like wine

And I'm hungry like the wolf

Stalked in the forest too close to hide

I'll be upon you by the moonlight side

Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

High blood Drumming on your skin it's so tight

You feel my heart I'm just a moment behind

Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo

In touch with the ground

I'm on the hunt I'm after you

Scent and a sound. I'm lost and I'm found

And I'm hungry like the wolf.

Strut on a line it's discord and rhyme

I howl and I whine I'm after you

Mouth is alive all running inside

And I'm hungry like the wolf.

Hungry like the wolf

Burning the ground I break from the crowd

I'm on the hunt I'm after you

I smell like I sound. I'm lost and I'm found

And I'm hungry like the wolf

Strut on a line it's discord and rhyme

I'm on the hunt I'm after you

Mouth is alive with juices like wine

And I'm hungry like the wolf

He bowed and gave a thankful smile to the audience and turned to the Judges. Umbridge was frowning, Voldemort looked remotely interested and Michael was nodding.

"Half-breed!" Umbridge spitted out, and someone threw a shoe at her.

"Would you be interested in heading my Werewolf Army?" Tom asked, Remus kindly declined. And Michael continued to nod,

"Good job." With a nod, Remus left the stage and the audience clapped. Dumbledore announced that they were to hear another sponsor and the group moaned collectively.

"Looking for some peace and quiet, away from the humdrum's of the Afterlife? Well come on over to Avalon Gardens. The Afterlife's number one resort. We have people certified in alignment of your soul, sunray wraps to get rid of those awful cloud blotches. And many other services our guest may need. Avalon Gardens is centrally located in the middle of the Golden city. Just walk through those pearly gates and take a streetcar named desire to the Avalon! See you there!"

"Now we have another Weasley, George this time with Jenny 8675309!" He looked identical to his twin, much to the happiness of the fangirls in the front row. He smiled and started.

Jenny Jenny, who can I turn to?

You give me something

I can hold on to

I know you think I like the others before

We your name and number on the wall

Jenny, I got your number

I need to make you mine

Jenny, don't change your number

8675309 (8675309)

Jenny Jenny, your only girl for me

You don't know me, but you make me so happy

I tried to call you before

But I lost mind

I tried my imagination,

But I was disturbed

Jenny, I got your number

I need to make you mine

Jenny, don't change your number

8675309 (8675309)

I got it (I got it)

I got it

I got your number on the wall

I got it (I got it)

I got it

For a good time

For a good time call

Jenny, I got your number

I need to make you mine

Jenny, don't change your number

8675309 (8675309)

Jenny, Jenny, who can I turn to?

(8675309)

On the bright side,

I can always turn to you

(8675309)

8675309

(8675309)

8675309

He finished and bowed, a little out of breath and grinning from ear to ear. The Judges were unimpressed.

"You're just like your brother." That was good, Umbridge. He has two in this competition.

"You all suck. Get off the stage." Tom told him. Michael shrugged,

"Didn't hate it, didn't like it." George left the stage and the girls shrieked in protest, but Albus silenced them,

"Now, now girls. You'll get them back, all back I promise. Next up we have Blaise Zabini with 'You Oughta Know'!" They crowd cheered and she walked out onto the stage.

I want you to know, that I am happy for you

I wish nothing but the best for you both

An older version of me

Is she perverted like me?

Would she go down on you in a theater?

Does she speak eloquently

And would she have your baby?

I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

'Cause the love that you gave that we made

Wasn't able to make it enough for you

To be open wide, No

And every time you speak her name

Does she know how you told me

You'd hold me until you died

Till you died, but you're still alive

And I'm here, to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair, to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful

I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know

Did you forget about me, Mr. Duplicity?

I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner

It was a slap in the face

How quickly I was replaced

And are you thinking of me when you fucked her?

'Cause the love that you gave that we made

Wasn't able to make it enough for you

To be open wide, No

And every time you speak her name

Does she know how you told me

You'd hold me until you died

Till you died, but you're still alive

And I'm here, to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair, to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

Ohh... aah... ahh... ahh...

'Cause the joke that you laid in the bed

That was me and I'm not gonna fade

As soon as you close your eyes, and you know it

And every time I scratch my nails

Down someone else's back I hope you feel it

Well, can you feel it?

'Cause the love that you gave that we made

Wasn't able to make it enough for you

To be open wide, No

And every time you speak her name

Does she know how you told me

You'd hold me until you died

Till you died, but you're still alive

And I'm here, to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair, to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

The song ended and she waved, turning to the Judges, who were shifting uncomfortably in their chairs.

"That was quite mean, my dear. The boy probably had a good reason to do something like that..." Umbridge said meekly. Voldmort snorted,
"If I was your boyfriend, I'd cheat. Whore."

"You seem to really connect to this song. Plus your voice was good. We'll see more of you I'm sure." Michael grinned slightly and she thanked them then left.

Dumbledore came back out,

"Hermione Granger, everyone, with 'Heartbreaker'!"

Hermione was apprehensive coming out, she'd never performed in front of a crowd this large before. But the music started and she relaxed.

Your love is like a tidal wave

Spinnin' over my head

Drownin' me in your promises

Better left unsaid

You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasies

The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around with me

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around, no no no

Your love has set my soul on fire

Burnin' outta control

You taught me the ways of desire

Now it's takin' its toll

You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasies

The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around with me

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around, no no no

You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasies

The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around with me

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

Love-taker, don't you mess around, no no no

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

love-taker, don't you mess around with me

You're a heartbreaker, dreammaker,

love-taker, heartbreaker!

Umbridge was back and smiled at her,

"You did marvelous." Voldemort scoffed,

"I can't believe they let you in. God what is the world coming too."

"Mighty fine, my girl!" Michael said and winked at her. She nodded embrassedly and left the stage. Albus was still clapping as he took center once more.

"Well, that was much better! Now, we only have one more act. The Golden Boy himself, Harry Potter!" He came out onto the stage in a getup straight from the 80's. The music started and he began.

We're a happy family we're a happy family we're a happy family me mom and daddy

Siting here in Queens eating refried beans we're in all the magazines

Gulpin' down thorazines we ain't got no friends our troubles never end

No Christmas cards to send daddy likes men daddy's telling lies baby's eating flies

Mommy's on pills baby's got the chills I'm friends with the President

I'm friends with the Pope we're all making a fortune selling Daddy's dope

Siting here in Queens eating refried beans we're in all the magazines

Gulpin' down thorazines we ain't got no friends our troubles never end

No Christmas cards to send daddy likes men

We're a happy family we're a happy family we're a happy family me mom and daddy

We're a happy family we're a happy family we're a happy family me mom and daddy...

He bowed to the fangirls and the rest of them, then turned to the Judges, the familiar twinge of pain in his scar as Voldemort glared at him.

"You need to stop telling lies. I thought we'd discussed that in your fifth year." She tutted and folded her hands in her lap.

"Avada Kedrava!" Voldemort bellowed, a green light shot out at Harry, who grinned. It bounced off him and hit Voldemort.

"Déjà vu." He muttered and sulked back. Michael smiled,

"Good job. You have talent." He nodded, gave Voldemort a wink and left the stage. Dumbledore came back on,

"Well, that concludes today's competition, you all have seen the contestants, now you must vote! The one with the least votes will be gone. You have until next week when the 15 remaining ones will perform a country song for us. Come on back!"

The lights went black and the crowd started to mill about, trying to get to one of the voting booths. Hopefully they'd be able to get the butterfly ballots. Wouldn't want something like the 2000 presidential election to happen. Next, we'll see how the contestants felt about their first performance and see what's brewing in the Afterlife Idol house.