Hello guys! I'm back...lol

As I said... here's an update for you guys...

Sorry if it took me quite some time to update this thing. Coz for some reason I just don't seem to be in the mood to write anything. And I can't think well enough of the dialogues. So I'm very sorry if it's really lame and boring. I was planning on writing this chapter to clear out some of the confusing and blank parts of the story so I wrote a timeline as well as their ages to help you out.

Sakura – 16

Syaoran – 16

Tomoyo – 16

Meilin – 16

Yukito – 21

Touya – 21

4th grade to 6th grade – card capturing days

6th grade – sakura started to fall in love with syaoran

7th grade – meilin transferred to their school (tomoeda), sakura confessed her feelings to syaoran

10th grade – current grade, where the story takes place

Also, I changed Meilin's last name to "Rae" instead of "Ling" which I used in the previous chapter since I read that this was the name he used in the western version of card captor sakura.

Once again I would like to thank those who reviewed my fic. You guys really brighten up my day. And perhaps I would continue writing this fic.

Melonheart – hehe sorry I was just kidding with that part... I won't kill sakura...lol. And don't worry I won't make Syaoran's confession cheesy... coz I also didn't like cheesy stories... and besides I'm not even sure if I could write something like that... thanks for constantly reviewing my fic and I hope you'll continue reading this...

Meow-Blossom – don't worry Sakura didn't really commit suicide. I was just kidding on that part... sorry if I confused you. Hope you'll like this one as well... thanks for the review!

Amasaki Reyoko – Thanks! I was really glad that you like my fic. I'll continue writing and make them better. Though I apologize if you won't like this one. But I'll try my best on the next chapters so please continue reading and writing reviews. Thanks! )

Sakura Potato – don't worry I'm not offended by the word "cute" coz I also used them when I'm reviewing other fics. And since you requested... perhaps I'll continue writing more of the story. And thank you for your kind offer. I really appreciate it, and I'd be glad to hear your opinions and suggestions for my story. So here's an update for you. Hope you'll like it. Though it's just a "bridge" chapter. Thanks! P

And here goes the dreadful formalities...lol

Discalimer: I don't own card captor sakura! Got it? So don't sue me. But Christmas is really getting near so why not give it to me as a present? Lol I'd be glad to accept it! :D

I'm changing the format of my story writing coz I realized that the previous format was kind'a confusing and I hope to lessen it with this new one...

Current POV

"Dialogues"

Flashback

'thoughs'

Letter

(Author's notes)

Last Chapter:

"My lady..." He said sounding really serious, though his insides had been really turning upside down.

"The moment I laid my eyes upon you... I knew it was love..."

Meilin listened as he started to play with his charade.

"Every waking moment I thought of nothing else but you. Your eyes, piercing through my soul..."

"Your hair... flowing radiantly like silk...

"And your lips... tempting and kissable drives me to my sanity..."

"And most especially your face... filled with serenity, kindness and beauty..."

He was surprised how it came naturally from his lips without him even stuttering. Probably because what he was saying was true and was coming from his heart.

"My lady I never believed in love until I saw you..."

"I love you so much... would you bestow me the honor of your love?"

He said finally releasing a sigh of relief. He wished that this was real. That he was really proposing to her. But then if this was real he probably would be turned down by her anyway.

After a few seconds of silence they both broke into fits of laughter holding out their stomachs. Their acting looked so real that if anybody saw them doing that would actually believe that it was true that they were really in love with each other.

Believe Me When I Say I Love You

Chapter 4: Of Memories and Acceptance...

Sakura POV

Last night was the worst day of my life. After I heard Syaoran's confession, I just ran and ran. It was stupid, I know. I didn't even wait to hear Meilin's answer. Who knows, she might even had rejected that 'baka'. But still I can't hold my tears.

I ran towards the garden. Good thing nobody's there or it would be really embarrassing. I was crying my eyes out when I felt Tomoyo sat beside. For some reason I felt that the place was mourning with me. It was sad. Cold winds blowing my skin. The darkness shrouding the glimmer in my eyes. All in all it was perfect for my heart. It seems as if everything was in perfect sync. For Meilin and Syaoran it was perfectly romantic, since they were in-love. But for me it was perfectly devastating. (Yah, I know she's kind' a dense not to notice that it was all just an act. But believe me, if you were on her place, you would've felt the same)

If it wasn't for Tomoyo's warm hand on my shoulder I wouldn't probably be feeling a little better now.

She was right there beside me as I sat silently weeping my eyes out. It's as if my tears have life of their own. They just keep on falling, never pausing. I leaned on her shoulders as she rubbed her warm hand on my back. At that moment I was really thankful for her. I felt so alone but still I was thankful for the silence. I was still not ready to speak up.

Anyway, we were there sitting for how long, I don't even remember. I was still sobbing, though I felt a lot better now when I heard my phone ringing. Thank god my brother was already there to pick me up. So I wiped my tears and calmed my heart for a couple of minutes hoping that my brother would not notice the redness in my eyes. Though I doubt he wouldn't. He might be a jerk at times, but he's really sensitive whenever he sees me like this. I wouldn't want him showering numerous questions at me. And as I have said earlier, I'm still not ready to speak up about it.

After a few minutes I stood up, Tomoyo eyeing me worriedly. I smiled to reassure her that I'm fine, though I'm really not. Then I turned on my heels and headed for the gate. As I board the passenger's seat Touya gave me that 'what-happened-with-you look'. But I just smiled at him and he gave out a sigh then finally started the engine. I noticed how he was stealing glances at me along the way. With his brows tied together and that popular 'whoever-made-you-cry-is-dead-meat' look on his face.

Finally we arrived home and I went straight to my bedroom. Good thing Kero was already sound asleep. I changed into my pj's and went down on my bed. Today is just another bad day, I thought as I closed my eyes hoping that tomorrow will be a lot better.

I woke up this morning feeling a lot better. I changed into my daily clothes and sat on my desk. We don't have classes today and for the hundredth time I thanked the heavens. I really needed a break especially after what happened last night. Otousan probably left already since it's already 10 in the morning. And Touya has probably gone to his work. So I'm probably alone now. I wondered where Kero has gone to. I stood up and headed out my room and went downstairs. I saw him lying on the couch. As usual drooling as he watches one of those cooking shows. I chuckled as I headed back to my room once again sitting in front of my desk.

Then I remember, I haven't written on my diary yet. And I definitely have a lot to write about. So I opened my drawer and took out my diary. Grabbed the key underneath my bookshelf and put it through the lock. I twisted it and the latch opened. I haven't really written on it since I was in the 7th grade. That time when I confessed to that 'baka' (she's referring to Syaoran P) but he thought I was still joking. And after that I don't know why I never wrote anything else. Maybe because nothing really interesting happened after that. Well except that time when Meilin transferred to our school and the baka was all over her. So was every guy in class. I wonder why I didn't write about that. Maybe because I don't want to remember about that day.

But when did I actually start liking that baka. I remember it during our Clow card capturing days. Boy I missed those days...

It was so fun back then. We were so close that Tomoyo even thought we were secretly in-love. But we were really just good friends. But when did I really start falling for him? I don't know...

I remember that time when we got stuck on an elevator after we went to the bear kingdom...

Syaoran and Sakura sitting on the elevator floor when suddenly the elevator moved. Floor numbers messing up and suddenly the floor tilted as Sakura went sliding towards the wall. The floor broke behind her and Syaoran stood up as he attempted to grab her hand. But he failed to catch her. He was mourning for her loss and shouted her name. "Sakura!!!!!!!" he yelled with passion and concern in his voice. Sakura then appeared carried by the float card. He looked at her with relief and concern all over his face as he wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace."

That was the first time he called me by my first name. I was so glad that I called him later and asked if I could call him by his first name as well. And he said yes. I thought then that he probably has feelings for me too... but I guess I was wrong.

He was always there for me, and I was really glad for his company... especially that time. That painful moment at the Seijou high festival. When I confessed my feelings to Yukito...

Sakura, Syaoran, Tomoyo and Yukito were walking together when they saw a sign near the entrance saying "Path of the stars".

"Oh this is our class exhibit, want to go inside?" Yukito asked as Nukuru Akizuki greeted them and lead them towards the entrance. Sakura said "yes" and Nakuru shoved them inside together leaving Tomoyo and Syaoran behind. It was marvelous. Miniature stars glimmering brightly as they walked together inside.

"Amazing!" Sakura exclaimed in pure joy and wonder.

"This is really wonderful" she said as they continued to walk towards the main feature of the exhibit. It was a large open space with stars hanging in the dark ceiling and walls forming different constellations. She then remembered about her resolve of finally confessing her feelings.

'I want him to know my true feelings' she thought as she called his name.

"Yukito-san..."she said and he turned towards her.

"Nani?" he said in a soft voice.

Turning a bit red she started... "Yukito-san..." she said as he smiled at her.

"Yukito-san... watashi... watashi..." she stuttered.

"Yukito-san... watashi... watashi... Yukito-san ga suki desu!" (Yukito-san I like you!) She ducked her head as he saw him face her.

"Sakura-chan wa suki dayo" (Sakura-chan I like you too) he answered.

"Demo..." he said looking down at her.

"I'm not the person you like the most."

"Huh?" she answered as Yukito went down and stared at her.

"Sakura, you really like your father, right" he asked.

"Hai..." she said in a soft voice while looking on the floor.

"What about me?"

"Suki desu" She answered as she looked up at him.

"Aren't those two the same feeling?" once again he asked her.

"That feeling that you really like your father...and the felling that you really like me. Aren't they similar?" he continued as Sakura closed her eyes and thought about it. She thought of her feelings for him and his father.

"They're similar..." she said after a moment as she opened her eyes.

"It's because I look a lot like Mr. Fujitaka"

"It's not that I'm trying to treat you like a child and not to answer your feelings..." he said.

"Hai... did you know all along, Yukito-san?" Sakura nodded as she asked him.

"Hai... and I was very happy that you thought of me like family, Sakura-chan." he replied with appreciation in his eyes.

I never cried in front of him but I was really in pain. But I don't want to cause him any trouble so I just smiled and said goodbye when we left that day.

I was really sad then that all I wanted to do was sit and cry my heart out. Syaoran offered to walk me home and I asked if we could drop by the park. We sat on the swing and there I cried really hard as I told him what happened. He gave me his handkerchief and once again I was glad for his presence. He just stayed with me and said he understood how I was feeling.

"Today... I told Yukito-san that I like him" Sakura narrated as she looked on the ground.

"I... I see..." Syaoran replied taking his eyes away from her.

"But Yukito said... that he wasn't my number one person..."

"He asked me whether or not my feelings for him...and the feelings I have for my dad were similar..." she continued, her eyes looking sad.

"They were...really similar..." she muttered, Syaoran now looking at her.

"But... there was another kind of 'like' for Yukito-san too..." she turned to him with a smile on her face.

"Just a little bit, but a different kind of 'like' from that of my dad..." she said once again looking sad.

Slowly she swayed the swing back and forth as she continued narrating her confession.

"Yukito-san already has someone he likes the most..."

"And that is someone that I really like too..."

"And I'm sure that person likes Yukito-san the most too..." She said still slowly swinging.

"So...I thought Yukito-san's number one doesn't have to be me..."

"And that I would be happy if Yukito-san could be together with the one he liked the most. Then I would also be happy as a result..."

Syaoran now looking at her intently with great concern.

She continued narrating still swaying back and forth.

"Tomoyo had told me before... that the biggest happiness is to see someone you really like stay happy..."

"I thought so too... that if Yukito-san is happy... that would make me the happiest..."

"But..." she said now with tears forming in her eyes.

"I'm not really sure why it is... but just a little bit..." now tears streaming down her face.

"I feel like tears are going to fall..."

"But if I cry or make a sad face... I'm sure that Yukito will be troubled..." She said now sobbing really hard.

Syaoran, unable to hold it off any longer, stood up in front of her.

"I hate this... why do these tears come out?"

"I really understood what Yukito-san wanted to say, I really did..."

"I really think that if Yukito-san is happy, everything is okay—"she said as she continued to wipe her tears with her fingers."

"Wakatta!" Syaoran cut her off as he handed her his handkerchief.

She looked up at him, tears still falling from her eyes.

"I understand, I know about it..." he said as Sakura held his hand and took his handkerchief.

"Arigato..." She said as she stood up and faced him.

She stared into his amber eyes and placed her head into his chest.

"Yukito-san...said that someday I will find someone I like more than anyone else..." she said while sobbing softly.

"And that person will like me more than anyone else too..."

He held her gently, placing his hands on her shoulders and said "It would be nice if you found him..."

"It's alright... I'm sure you will find him..." He said in a soft voice as they held onto each other.

That was probably when I started really falling for that baka. Back then he was so sweet and caring. Though he liked teasing me, he always has an air of gentleness and kindness in him.

It was really fun then... until that they that Meilin transferred to our school...

"Okay class... I'd like to introduce our new transferee... Miss Rae Meilin... please come in." Terada-sensei said extending his hand to signal the new student to step inside the room. (Okay guys... I'll be changing Meilin's last name to "Rae" coz I thought that it sounded a lot better and it would probably be less confusing that way since "Rae" was her last name on the Western version.)

Everyone stared wide eyed as a crimson-eyed student with a long silky black hair tied in two buns stepped inside the room.

"Ooohs and aahhs" were heard as they eyed her from head to toe. (Lol...they're not perverts!)

"Miss Rae, please tell us something about your self." The sensei said as he turned around and wrote the new student's name on the board.

"Hello everyone... I'm Meilin Rae. 13 years old. My family just moved here. We travel a lot since my dad is a businessman. My favorite subjects are Music and PE. Yoroshiku onegai shimasu!"

And from that day on... everything has changed. The 'baka' seem to have forgotten me. He was so besotted over her that he was probably thinking of her every waking moment. Before he would probably have recognized if I was still joking or if I'm really serious. But now, it's as if he doesn't really care at all. He screams at me when he was on a bad mood but before he probably would have just teased me back when he's annoyed.

Worst of all was he didn't even notice the pain in my voice when he laughed at me during my so called "confession" when we were in 7th grade.

Sakura and Syaoran walking together on their way home as they left Tomoyo's house. Today was Tomoyo's birthday party and it was already late so Tomoyo asked Syaoran to walk Sakura home. They passed the Penguin Park when Sakura asked if they could sit for a little bit. They sat on the swing. Sakura looking a bit nervous sighed then turned towards Syaoran.

"Ne... Syaoran-kun..." she said looking a bit red on the face.

"Huh?" He replied as he swinged back and forth.

"Ano... we've been friends for quite a long time already..."

"And I feel that we're really close..." she said nervously pulling the ribbon in front of her dress. It was a knee-level dress. Pink in color with ruffles on its hem and sleeves and a sailor style collar. It has a big red ribbon on its front with a green oval brooch attached to it.

Syaoran looked at her with confusion on his face raised his brow as if in question as to what her point was for starting this conversation.

"Ano... I... I think... I..." she stuttered trying to summon enough courage to bring out his feelings.

"Hey... quit mumbling and say it already!" He said sounding a bit annoyed.

"I really like you Syaoran-kun!" She said continuously as her face turned as red as a tomato.

Syaoran was silent as if assessing what he had just heard.

Then all of a sudden he laughed. A big and loud laugh as he stood up and clutched his stomach trying to get air from too much laughing.

"Whahahahaha! Nice one Sakura-chan! You almost got me there!" he said still clutching his stomach.

Sakura's eyes opened wide, eyes shimmering in disbelief. She just confessed to him and he just stood there like a big jerk laughing so hard as if his life depends on it.

"Okay you can come out now Daidouji-san!"

"That was a nice trick! How long did you two planned this?" he asked now finally calming his breathing after laughing so hard.

Sakura unable to believe what he said looked down in disbelief and silently walked away.

Syaoran however didn't seem to notice Sakura leaving as he scans the place thinking that there was probably a hidden camera somewhere in the area. (I know... he is a big jerk! P)

Dang it! He's such a baka! But then he never really took me seriously. Even after that he acted as if nothing happened. He really thought we were just making fun of him. But it was my fault anyway. I never really stopped teasing him.

I sighed in resolution as I opened my dairy.

I grabbed my pen and stared at it for a couple of seconds before finally starting to write.

March 26, 2004

Dear Diary,

Last night was the worst day of my life. I just heard Syaoran propose to Meilin but I never really got to hear her reply. I was a coward and all I did was run away and cried my eyes out.

That event though, I feel, made me stronger. I realized something as I woke up this morning. I really should not dwell on my past. From now on I'll be stronger. I won't be a coward and ran away from everything. If Syaoran doesn't like me, then I'll accept it with a smile on my face and face a new day with confidence. I remembered that Yukito-san said that someday I will find the person that will love me the most. And that probably wasn't Syaoran. I promise to myself that I'll definitely find that person no matter what. So from now on... I'll be a different person. Good bye Syaoran-baka, though I thank you for making me stronger. I'm already over you... and you know why? Because at this moment, I just grew up...

Always,

Sakura

TBC...

baka - idiot

suki - like

yoroshiku onegai shimasu - glad to meet you

demo - but

So how was it? I hope you liked it...

Though it is a bit lame and boring I hope you'll understand. This chapter is just a bridge chapter to enlighten you guys with the real sense of the story. Next chapter will be a bit different as the real story unfolds itself.

Btw, I was just wondering how you would like the story to go on... or should I even continue writing it. Would you like it to be long or short? And how many chapters would you like it to have?

Now please do me a favor and click that button below...

Your reviews really inspire me a lot and make me want to make more stories so please review )

Comments? Suggestions? Violent reactions? Constructive criticisms are all welcome (even flames too... though I hope there'll be none)