Warning: mature subject matter, suggestiveness, and plain old weirdness.
I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its theme song, no matter how many times I wish it so. I do however own Takashi. He's MINE! Mine I tell you!!! MiNe!!!!!!Anywayz, enjoy!
You've Bought A Broken Disk part1
It was just another day on destiny island. Sun was shining brightly over them, the ocean was as blue as ever and there was a slight breeze blowing along the whole of the island. Sora watched some fish as they swam by.
"Better not move Sora, or the fish will think your whopping feet are after them, hahaha."
Sora looked into the eyes of his rival Riku.
"Well, not before they hide from your face Riku!"
"HA HA HA HEE HEE HEE HO! Was that a joke??" Riku fell to the ground holding his sides.
"You guys! We need to finish this raft! Sora, you need to get those supplies!"Kairi said out of nowhere.
"Okay Kairi, but only after you pull down your skirt and run around the island twice."
CRACK!
Selphie cracked Sora over the head with her whip, and knocked him out.
"How dare you Sora! That would kill my eyes, I would much rather Riku do it instead!"
She eyeballed Riku up and down.
"Yeah, baby!"she said to her self and licked her lips.
"Erm.....I think not...."said Riku.
He dashed away across the sand followed closely by Selphie.
"Wait Baby! I just wanna talk!"
"I guess I'm gonna be doing this on my own....."Kairi went on to get the supplies for their trip.
---------------- 3 hours later -------------------------------
"Huh......wha???"
Sora rubbed his head as he came to his feet.
"Where is everyone?? Where the hell am I??" he searched the desolate wasteland he was standing on for some sort of clue.
Large sign------------- You're in the middle of Nowhere,
How you gonna get out?????
"Oh, hell....."
------------------------Back on the island:
"Kairi, please tell me the raft is finished!!" Riku said as he came around the island for the 10,507 time.
"Almost Riku, I'll call you when it's done."
----------------- 5,000 rounds later ------------------
"I'm finished Riku, now go get Sora!"
"Where is he?"
Riku fell flat on his face, and was attacked by Selphie.
"Stop playing around you guys! Where is Sora?"
"I dunno"Riku got up looking like he got mauled by a bear.
"Kairi, she kissed me EVERYWHERE!"he said, his eye twitching.
"Sora........"Kairi looked out to the horizon.
The Kingdom Hearts theme song started from thin air.
-You're giving meeee.....
"What the Hell??!!"
-Too maaanny things......
"Where is....."
-Lately.........
"That crap coming from???"
Just then they saw something dropping from the sky...
"OH MY GOD, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!"
The thing uncurled itself from ball position.
"It's a boy!"
"OH MY GOD, HE'S GOING TO DIE!!!!!"
"Shut up Riku!!" Kairi said watching the person drop.
Selphie was laying in the sand tired from her kiss fest.
"You have got to try that out sometime Kairi!"
"PLEASE MOMMY NO! DON"T LET THE CRAZY GIRL KISS ME AGAIN!!!"
"Calm down Riku its over!"
"Fingers......lips......probing.....NOOOOOO!!!!!!!"
Kairi rolled her eyes.
"What on this Island is taking this dude so long to fall!?"
Kairi sat down pulled out some paper and doodled Sora's name, over and over.
"My gosh! This is taking too long!"
The boy crashed into Kairi and knocked into the sand.
"Oops, mah bad......"
"YOU KILLED KAIRI!!! YOU BASTARD!!"
"It's not my fault she was sittin' there!"
-tick........tock-
"You're right......anywayz, my name's Riku!"
"I'm Takashi."
They shook hands, but Riku didn't let go.
"My, My, you've got a strong grip don't you........"he grinned.
"Whoa! Sorry fella, I don't go that way!"
"We'll see about that......heh heh heh......"