So, Who Stole the Marshmallows?
By Pyrasi
Gaspeth! The third chapter is officially here! Well, not really, since I'm just about to write it and by the time I finish two days will probably pass (yea, I'm that slow. What's it to ya? Eh? Wanna make something of it, punk?). But oh well, we can ignore that, right? Good. Anyways, I'd like to thank everyone for the reviews! You guys are wonderful! Superb! Rockin' da house, yo! (note: I would never, ever say that in real life. I'm just feeling all uppity and hyper, due to all the Halloween candy I've just consumed. Hence, craziness might ensue. Hoo boy).
…-sweatdop- err, well then! On with the chapter!
"So, let me get this straight," Hiro said, scratching the back of his head, puzzled by the current situation (and how in the world and beyond he got into it, for that matter). "You two are girl scout leaders? From Canada? Who came to Japan with your troops to go camping on Mount Fuji? …Err, isn't that a 3776 meter high volcano?"
"Sure is!" Marilyn-Susana said cheerfully, munching on a Granola bar (courtesy of Squirrel, who, oddly enough, had a duffel bag full of them).
"So… Wouldn't it be kind of a bad idea to go there?"
The young girl blinked naively. "Hmm… Hadn't thought of that..."
Hiro raised an eyebrow, pondering about the security of Canada's Girl Scouts organization.
"So, erm… Where are your troops, then?" Suguru was trying hard to make sense of everything that had happened, but so far, he seemed to be failing miserably.
"Well… We were on a train… And then part of it made a click sound and went far, faaaar away from the rest of the train… And now we dunno! Pass the pretzel bag!" Marilyn grinned happily and delicately popped one of the salty snacks into her mouth.
…As she continued to eat, anyone in the 'happy little group' who had at least a drop of common sense in them proceeded to stare at the girl, questioning in their minds if she hit her head falling off the train, or something along those lines.
"…So, what are you going to do now?" Hermione broke the silence. It was getting a bit awkward, sitting in a circle like they were, without a clue what to do next.
"Umm… Now, I'm gonna put another pretzel in my mouth! These things are yummy!" Marilyn giggled, accidentally dropping a pretzel onto the ground "Aww, darn! Now it's all icky! I'm not touching that!"
"Marilyn, think about the trees, man…" Squirrel walked over to the pretzel, picked it up carefully and putting it in a plastic bag with a recycling sign on it. "Littering is bad… 'Cause like, an animal might choke on the garbage… And like, we need to be in harmony with the natural world… And yea…" she trailed off, eyes having a distant look.
Hermione laughed nervously, not really sure what to do with herself at this point. "Um… Uh, what about the Girl Scout troops that were with you on that train? Aren't you worried for them? After all, you two were… well, separated from it. Was there another responsible adult on the train? …And how do you two plan on getting back?"
Marilyn paused her pretzel feast for a moment, expression turning mildly thoughtful. "A responsible adult? Um, there was that person who was driving the train… He had the cutest doggy suit! So fluffy!" she squealed in delight.
Hermione took that as a 'no' to the responsible adult question.
"Well… What do you plan to do about the girls?! I mean, they're in a foreign country, all alone! It's you're responsibility to take care of them, after all! Think of their parents!!" Hermione went from being tongue-tied to enraged in a matter of seconds, wondering why young children would be put in the hands of these… people. Dog suit? That was going too far.
"Chill out, dude... They're probably, like, fine…"
"And what makes you say that?!"
"Take life in ease, man… Worrying ain't worth it… Mother nature is like, takin' care of 'em now…" obviously, Squirrel was a very logical person.
Hermione shook her head and sighed. People these days, she thought to herself bitterly as she turned to Ron, a sort of pleading expression on her face.
(…Wow, you know something's wrong when Hermione looks to Ron for comfort in a nutty situation.)
But much to her dismay, Ron was staring at Marilyn in awe, and from what Hermione could tell, that was not the holy-crap-you're-fucking-insane kind of awe.
"She… She… She's a… Veela…" he suddenly stuttered, eyes nearly as wide as saucers.
Now Hermione was really mad. Her anger was suitably expressed with a slap on Ron's cheek. "RON!!! HOW IN THE WORLD CAN YOU LET YOUR HORMONES TAKE OVER AT A TIME LIKE THIS?! UGH!!" she buried her face in her hands, mumbling something about being lost and missing Mother's special turkey feast for thanksgiving.
"Err, no need to panic," Tohma said, sweatdropping. Clearly, the camera crew was not about to arrive, so he decided to take matters into his own hands, considering everyone else was either off their rockers or… well, just not doing a thing. "I suppose we should set up camp, and gather some wood for a fire. We can sleep on the matter and come up with a way to get out of this mess tomorrow, when our thinking is a little clearer. I say we organize ourselves into groups and start preparing everything."
Sakano was practically glowing with pride. Mr. President always knows what to do, he thought to himself, once more feeling incredibly lucky to work in NG.
…Y'know, I've always suspected that Sakano built a shrine for Tohma… He may even consider himself a Tohma-ist. Who knows?
"Whee! Camping! I hope I get to share a tent with Yuki-kun…"
Malfoy swore he could see little hearts in Shuichi's eyes as the pink-haired singer said this, and needles to say, he found that just a little creepy.
"Woah, dude! It's like, a badger!" Squirrel stated joyfully as if she had found gold, running after the furry creature.
"Hey Squirrel! Come baaaack!" Shuichi yelled pleadingly. "Help us collect wood! I'm getting splinters! Owwie…" he rubbed his thumb tenderly.
Malfoy rolled his eyes. Pink hair, hearted eyes, high voice, whining over splinters… To him, the boy seemed as queer as can be, and it was making him uncomfortable. Picking up another piece of wood and sticking it in his sack, he wondered how he was going to get through this little camping trip, if he was going to get through it at all. I can see it now, right in The Daily Profit: Draco Malfoy, son of the respectable Lucius Malfoy, died a week ago in a freak camping accident, surrounded by annoying do-goody Gryffindors, a pair of mentally ill Girl Scout leaders, and a bunch of Japanese locals with abnormal hair colors, he thought to himself.
But a loud shriek from in front of him cut his morbid train of thought short. He spun around, wondering what had happened and exactly how it was going to affect him, only to realize that Shuichi had dropped an especially large piece of wood on his foot. Seeing this didn't have any influence on his state of being whatsoever, Malfoy continued to pick up scraps of wood, rolling his eyes at the boy.
But, said boy kept sobbing pitifully, and after approximately thirty seconds, Malfoy decided that he had to do at least something about it.
"You really suck, you know that?"
…Yes, that something was throwing a half-assed insult. Could've been full-assed, but Malfoy didn't want to waste his vocabulary.
Shuichi blinked. "Actually, Yuki says I'm really bad at it."
"…What?"
The boy sighed. "I try, but he still says I can't do it right! Tatsuha offered to teach me, but getting help from him would mean being unfaithful to my Yuki…"
At that, Malfoy decided it was silly to think seeing hearts in one's eyes was creepy, since this, by far, took the cake (and a few chocolate bars, to boot. Possibly a candy cane). This in mind, he proceeded to get as far away from the singer as possible without loosing track of the campsite.
…Clearly, Shuichi wasn't very familiar with the fine art of English slang.
"WATCH WHERE YOU AIM THAT THING, K!!"
"Oh god oh god oh goooood I am never coming out of this alive…"
"AGGGH, FUCKING BIRDS!! TAKE THAT!!"
Wisps of smoke rose into the otherwise clear forest air as K added to the wonderful sounds of nature by shooting a pair of birds who were, for some mysterious reason, 'disrupting the fragile process of putting up tents.' But, as usual, the trigger-happy maniac had gone just a tad overboard with his shooting, and, well, forced poor Hermione and Hiro to duck and hide for cover.
"FORGET ABOUT THE BIRDS K, WE'VE GOT TENTS TO BUILD!!" Hiro yelled, hoping that his manager would listen to him this time.
"Ah, s'ok, the birds are already gone," K replied happily, evidently proud of his work. "Y'know, we can use 'em for dinner…" he turned to the small tree Hermione was crouching under. "Hey, kid, can you go fetch those birds over there?"
Said 'kid' wrinkled her nose in disgust, but, a little afraid to argue with K at that moment, she obeyed without an argument.
"'Kay, just tie this rope around this piece of wood, and I'll hammer it into the ground." the manager said, handing Hiro a scruffy old cord, a hammer in his other hand. As he pounded the wood into the ground, Hiro, who was watching the task being done, started to wonder. There were only four medium-sized tents… but there were just about sixteen people. Which meant… Oh, crud… The redhead groaned inwardly, realizing what arguments would arise about who'd be sharing tents with who. Shuichi would obviously want to go with Yuki, but he had a suspicion that Tohmamight want to go with Yuki as well… But Sakanowould probably want to go with Tohma, which would make Tohma, Yuki, Sakano, and Shuichi share a tent… He shuddered at the thought of Sakano and Shuichi together, both of them being rather jumpy. And if they were to go together… He would be stuck with K (who slept with his gun), Tatsuha (who would probably try to do something 'funny' to Ryuichi in his sleep), and Ryuichi himself (and who knew what kind of sleeping habits he had?! Or if the hyperactive pop star slept at all, for that matter)… But then, what about the Girl Scout leaders and the other kids? The guitarist's head spun at the thought of all the combinations.
"Err, here they are." Hermione said in a slightly disgusted tone, one of her hands holding her nose and the other holding two dead birds. "Are you sure you want to eat them…?"
Harry sighed and rested his chin on his knees, hugging them to keep from getting cold. The fire Tatsuha and Ryuichi had started (which nearly burned down the forest, much to the dismay of Squirrel) was large indeed, but even its flickering wisps of heat couldn't keep poor Harry warm. He was, after all, rather skinny, and his last good warm sweater was ruined by Dudley as a birthday present last summer.
"Hey Harold!! You look really cold! Want a blanket?" Marilyn walked over to Harry, handing him a pink quilt with glittering rainbows and unicorns.
"Uh, it's Harry," the young wizard said, eyeing the blanket.
"Oh, OK Archibald!" the girl 'corrected' herself. "Well, do you want it or not? It's a special blanket. One of my royal maids gave it to me as a present."
"Royal… maids?"
Marilyn grinned. "Yup! My royal subjects like me lots!"
"…You have royal subjects?" Harry questioned, raising an eyebrow.
"Sure do! I'm Princess Marilyn-Susana Oralie Etincelle, soon to become ruler of the Netherlands!" flipping her perfectly-groomed hair, the girl's eyes seemed to sparkle as she revealed her royalty.
…The group stared. And stared. And stared some more, for good measure.
Until Hermione broke the (rather awkward) silence, that is.
"You're… Royalty?"
Said royalty nodded, delicately putting yet another pretzel into her mouth (pretzels and snacks was all the group had, since they decided against eating the birds K shot, for obvious reasons).
"So… If you're a Dutch princess, what were you doing in Canada, leading a Girl Scouts troop?"
"Oh, well, mixing with the commoners is always a good thing. I like to see how you peasants are doing from time to time." The princess replied, clearly believing she was doing an immense favor to the world around her.
Yuki raised an eyebrow. She's got a nice body, but the girl's dumb as a rock, he thought, taking another smoke from his cigarette (his second pack, already. Tsk tsk).
Ron's eyes were beyond saucers at this point. "Princess… Veela… Netherlands… Marshmallow…" he mumbled, undoubtedly bordering incoherent.
Seeing this, Hermione began turning redder by the second. Oh wonderful, the dumb bimbo thinks she's a princess! she thought, a wave of anger coming upon her. The prefect suddenly fumed at the thought of having to deal with this girl (and Ron's behavior around her) for even a minute longer. She wasn't the type to feel such hatred to those she didn't know very well, but this girl... This girl seemed to be an exception, for whatever reason.
"Um… Herm… I think you're a bit too close to the fire…" Harry said as he eyed his friend's face, slightly worried.
"…What? Oh, sorry Harry," Hermione laughed nervously. "I was just… Um… Yes, I think moving away from the fire a bit will do…" she continued, backing away from the clump of flames.
"Say, who's got the marshmallows?" Ryuichi (who had been completely oblivious to the situation so far) asked cheerfully.
Marilyn blinked. "Marshmallows? I think Squirrel has the marshmallows."
Squirrel looked up from the line of ants she was observing. "Yea, I got a ton of marshmallows, man… They were like, for the troops…" she dug into her bag, pulling out packs of Granola bars, sunflower seeds, pretzels, a ukulele(1), some Green Party posters, and other assorted items.
As the group stared wide-eyed at her bag, wondering how in the name of the laws of physics she could fit everything in there (well, those who paid attention in class and actually knew what the laws of physics were, at least), Squirrel made a horrifying announcement.
"Dude, like… The marshmallows are gone…"
Ron looked like he was both ready to cry and burn the forest into ashes when the announcement was made. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'WHERE DID THE MARSHMALLOWS GO?!"
Squirrel blinked behind her sunglasses (…sunglasses? Ye gods, it was almost pitch black outside). "Dude… Like, chill man… It's just marshmallows…"
Ron groaned and buried his head in his hands. "Just marshmallows… Just marshmallows…" he muttered to himself, the realization that he was stuck in the middle of nowhere with no sweets slowly sinking in. "They were the only damned thing that could make this stupid camping shit better, and now they're gone…"
Suguru rolled his eyes (gasp! So did Malfoy! What a coincidence). "Look, if you sit there and whine about food, we are going to get absolutely nowhere." He stated coolly. "I suggest that you get up and refrain from feeling sorry for yourself, because we still have the matter of choosing tents and getting out of here to figure out."
At the sound of 'choosing tents', everyone (including Ryuichi) perked up and listened.
This was it. This was when who would spend the night by who's side, who would suffer who's snoring and drooling, and who would get to see who's eccentric pajamas was going to be decided. It was the moment of decision, the moment of anticipation, the moment of truth…
…And it will be revealed, when we continue on to chapter four.
(1) – for those who don't know, it's a type of guitar. –cough-
Bwahaha! A cliffhanger! Fear the evil authoress! –shakes a pitchfork- …Erm, yes. Anyways, you have no idea how glad I am to finish this chapter! Sure, it was fun to write, but it was giving me quite a bit of trouble. Yarr, I hate writers block. I hope it comes out OK. Sorry if it was OOC, guys. I try, I try… And it can be hard, with all the homework I get. But anyways, it's time to give out the candy for the reviewers! Sadly, I don't have any lemon tart at the moment, but I do have miniature gingerbread houses. Enjoy!