Two Squids, Just for You
It's finally here! Another chapter! I don't like this one as much, it's kind of a transition chapter, and next chapter you find out exactly where the title of the story comes from. No guessing, don't want to give it away for everyone else. I'm also writing a new story, and am looking for beta-readers. Anyone??
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Chapter 4: More About James
"What do you think of James, Lily?" Remus asked as he and Lily strolled the corridors a few nights later. The moon was only a crescent shape, and thus Remus was feeling quite well and in the mood for a bit of snooping.
"I'm not sure Remus." Lily answered softly, her green eyes were staring straight ahead, glazed over and distracted.
Remus glanced at his watch. It was only nine thirty, and they had patrols till eleven. He assumed that Lily had quite a bit on her mind to be so silent, and was kind of hoping she would tell him about it, so time wouldn't go by so slowly. They were close, he and Lily. Not as close as Cynthia and Sirius when they weren't mad at each other (which they still were), but they had been good friends since first year, when Lily first ran into Remus on the platform. He liked to think of himself as her older brother of sorts.
"Talk to me." Remus stated simply.
It was like a dam had burst, and words began spilling out of Lily's mouth at an alarming rate. "I really don't know Remus, I mean, I used to think he was just an ignorant, egotistical, bullying jerk, but now we're trying to be friends, and he's nice, and funny... I just don't get him. Is that why you're friends with him? He's different when everyone's not watching?"
Remus grinned. So Lily had noticed a slight change in James' persona. Well, truly it wasn't a change; she was just seeing a different side of him. "Yeah, he is. He's himself when only people he trusts and cares about are around."
"Why isn't he himself all the time?" Lily asked.
Remus was lost for words. It would be somewhat hard to explain to Lily, who was a muggle-born, and he couldn't use that as an excuse without offending her. "Err... well, James's family has high expectations."
"Of what?" Though she had insulted, yelled, and shared a common room with him for five years, Lily realized she knew very little about James. And she insulted him constantly, when she knew nothing about him, it obviously wasn't fair of her to judge. It was then that she decided to apologize to him the next time she saw him.
"Of him. Of his friends." Remus answered. "He grew up learning that he was better than everyone else, and for his first four years at Hogwarts, he believed it."
"And then..." Lily said, indicating for him to continue.
"His sister Laura got sick. Before she died, she broke free from the family and did everything they ever told her not to. She told James that he wasn't better than everyone else and that 'that Lily Evans girl' was completely right when she – you I mean – told him he was an arrogant prat." Remus said softly, as they turned the corner and began walking down the Charms corridor.
"And he still acted like one afterwards because?"
"Keep up the concept that nothing was wrong with him, and that Laura's death didn't affect him." Remus said solemnly.
"Oh."
Silence engulfed the pair for a moment, Lily staring at the floor lost in thought once more, Remus staring at the side wall, catching fleeting glances of the moon as they passed each window. Lily glanced up and caught Remus watching the moon.
"When's the next full moon?" she asked softly.
Remus grimaced. "Not for a while. Happened just last week-end. But I still feel like such a monster."
Lily had first guessed of Remus's condition in the third year after a lesson on werewolves, and he had confirmed it for her in the fifth year, when they were both made prefects and he had to excuse himself from rounds and meetings once a month. Lily, having grown up a muggle held no prejudice towards him, so they had grown closer.
"You're not a monster, Remus. And soon they'll find a cure, don't you worry." Lily said with a reassuring smile, linking arms with Remus. Remus smiled half-heartedly for a moment, before silence reigned over the two again.
"You know how jealous James would be?" Remus asked with an amused tone after a few minutes.
"Jealous about what?"
"This." Remus said, lifting his arm, which was linked with hers. Lily snorted.
"I doubt that, Remus. It's just this dumb infatuation he has, he'll get over it." Lily said knowledgably.
"I don't think it's a dumb infatuation, Lils." Remus said cautiously. "And if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were developing feelings for him too."
Lily sighed softly. "I can't Remus."
"Why not? I know he can be a prat, but James is really a great guy." Remus protested, untwining their arms and making Lily stop walking and face him by grabbing her shoulders.
"I know he is, Remus." Lily said quietly, looking toward the floor yet again.
"Then why aren't you giving him a chance?!" the volume and intensity of Remus's voice was rising steadily, and Lily's face was beginning to crease with fear.
"I can't, Remus." Lily said quietly.
"WHY THE BLOODY HELL NOT?!?" Remus demanded.
"I said I can't, Remus." Lily insisted, keeping her voice even, before checking her watch. "I think we're done now Remus."
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Remus entered the sixth-year boys dormitory to find it relatively deserted, except for James. Frank was obviously off somewhere with Alice Prewett, and he wasn't sure where or what Sirius and Peter were up to, and frankly he didn't care. He was still teeming from his (rather one-sided) argument with Lily, but James didn't seem to notice. In fact, James Potter had his nose in a book. A rather large, dusty, probably illegal book.
"What you reading, Prongs?" Remus asked as he sunk into his bed across the room, not really caring but hoping to distract him from what Lily had said.
"A book." James replied casually.
"I can see that." Remus replied, somewhat sarcastically. "What kind of book?"
"A Transfiguration book." James answered as casually as possible. James was easily the best Transfiguration student in the year, let alone the school; he had a natural knack for it, so why he would need a book was already indicating something.
"A Transfiguration book?" Remus repeated. "Why would you need a book on your best subject?"
"This is going to be slightly harder than I thought." James admitted.
"What is?"
"This spell I'm looking up. It's something I'm going to do for Lily." James said sheepishly.
"I think you should give up on Lily, James." Remus said quietly. He was treading on weak ground; James was very emotional about Lily and normally Sirius would talk to James about Lily since Remus was slightly biased in his 'big brother' role.
"Pardon?" James asked, looking unconvinced. Normally Remus would give his relative consent about James's feelings, the same with Sirius, and suddenly both were backing out on him.
"I think you should give up on Lily, James." Remus repeated.
"Why?" James asked, with a look that mixed anger and disappointment on his face.
"Because I don't think she'll ever consider you more than just a friend." Remus muttered inaudibly.
Not hearing Remus's response, James decided he didn't want to, and that he needed the advice of one of Lily's friends. Picking up his book, he left the dormitory and journeyed down to the common room, where Joanne sat quietly by the fire, reading, as always. He slumped down into the armchair across from hers, startling her.
Clutching her chest, eyes widened, Jo visibly relaxed when she realized who it was exactly who had sat down. "Jesus, you fucking scared me!"
James grinned. For being the quietest of Lily's group of friends, Jo did have quite the mouth on her. "Sorry bout that. I wanted to talk to – "
"You just missed Lily." Jo said automatically.
"No, I wanted to talk to – " James began again.
"Cyn refuses to talk to anyone who is friends with Sirius Black." Jo responded again quickly.
"I actually wanted to talk to you, or Alice." James chuckled.
Jo smiled awkwardly. "Oops. What about?"
"Lily." James answered simply. Jo put on a mock grimace.
"Her? Again?"
"Do you think she likes me?" James asked seriously.
"I think... she's warming to you." Jo answered honestly.
"So you think I stand a chance?" James asked earnestly, pleased with her first answer.
Not knowing about Lily's status as an untouchable, Jo nodded with a small smile. "I think you might, Potter. But make sure you don't screw up acting like a prick again."
One of the dormitory doors creaked open and within a few moments, Lily could be seen climbing down the girl's stairwell. Her eyes were slightly red, her hair pulled up in a messy ponytail, and in a pair of boxers and a tank top. Both Jo and James looked up to see her, but she only noticed Jo.
"Jo, you coming up?" Lily called as she reached the foot of the stairs. Seeing James her smile faltered slightly, but he was too busy looking her up and down to notice. Jo frowned slightly, seeing James might already be ruining his chances.
"Err... yeah, I s'ppose." Jo gave a quick smile to James. "Goodnight James."
Jo stood and walked up the stairs, Lily turning to follow.
"Lily! Could I err... talk to you for a minute?" James asked lamely.
"Uh, sure. About what, P-James?" Lily asked, turning and joining James by the fire in Jo's old seat. She was still in her old habit of calling James by his last name, and as she tried to correct it, it had become an odd mixture.
"Do you believe in love?" James asked bluntly.
Lily frowned slightly. "I think so. Under the right circumstances, yeah, I guess."
"How long does it take to fall in love with someone?"
"I'm not sure, P-James, it really depends. I mean, you probably have to know a lot about the person..."
"Like what?" James persisted, ignoring how awkward Lily looked.
"I'm not sure. What they like, I s'ppose?" Lily offered.
"I guess that makes sense." James concluded.
Lily smiled. "Is that all you wanted, James?"
"Yeah, thanks Lily."
Lily pulled herself up from her chair and began to climb the dormitory stairs.
"Lily!"
Lily leaned over the banister to look at James questioningly.
"What's your favourite type of Bertie Botts?"
"Err... Not telling."
"Not telling?" James asked in amusement. "It can't be that bad."
"Yes, it can." Lily said, blushing slightly. 'Don't you dare blush Lily Evans, don't you dare. You do not like this boy. No feelings other than friendship. None.'
"Come on, tell me. It'll be our secret." James said with a grin, not noticing the portrait hole swing open.
"Fine. I like... the grass flavoured ones. Happy?" Lily asked, her face now a shade of crimson.
"Yes, I am."
"Good night James."
"Good night, Lily."
Lily soon disappeared up in the girls' dormitories, and James sat, deep in thought, by the fire for a few moments longer, before he too went up to bed. It was then that Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew removed James's invisibility cloak, both still looking gob smacked.
"Peter, I do believe that James feelings for Lily are beyond a redhead fetish now." Sirius announced solemnly.
"How do you know?" Peter asked cluelessly.
"He's still completely infatuated after learning that she likes grass flavoured Bertie Botts. Who likes grass flavoured Bertie Botts? For chrissakes!"
"I like the grass ones. And the cool caramel-coloured ones." Peter protested.
"The caramel-coloured ones?" Sirius asked incredulously.
"Yeah. They're yummy!" Peter defended.
"Wormtail, man, those are earwax flavoured"
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"Ooh Cynthia!" Sirius called cheerily as he entered the Great Hall the next morning. Cynthia grimaced. Not only was it Sirius, who she was still very mad at, but also, being the 'none-morning' person that she was, Sirius was acting much to chipper for her.
Jo and Alice giggled, while Lily smiled.
"What, Black?" Cynthia replied sharply as Sirius dropped onto the bench next to her and draped an arm over her shoulders.
"I have something very funny to tell you." Sirius said with a grin.
"Oh?" Cynthia replied nonchalantly as she reached for some more bacon.
"Yup. I bet you can't guess what Wormtail's favourite flavour of Bertie Botts is." Sirius said, grinning broadly.
"By Wormtail you mean Peter, correct?" Lily asked from across the table, joining the conversation after finishing a letter from her parents.
"Yes, Evans, get with it." Sirius replied, pretending to be annoyed. Lily rolled her eyes. "Now guess!"
"It's too early to guess, enlighten me, Black." Cynthia said in a bored tone.
Sirius paused for dramatic effect. "Earwax!"
All four girls and Sirius broke out into hysteric laughter, Cynthia choking on the water she had just swallowed, Alice hitting the table and causing the plates to rattle slightly, and Lily and Jo hunched over. There was nothing like laughing at Peter's stupidity to get your friend to forgive you and have a good laugh.
Peter entered the hall only moments later, sending the five into a fresh bout of laughter before Remus joined them and got them to shut up, only to spare what was left of Peter's ego.
"So, Cynthia, is your dearest mother coming to my dearest mother's party this week-end?" Sirius asked, a broad smile still playing on his lips. Most of the girls in the hall were now staring at him hungrily, but for once he didn't notice. He didn't want to get on Cynthia's bad side again already.
"No, I'm afraid they've had a bit of a spat." Cynthia answered.
"Tragic, really." Sirius said solemnly.
"Yes," Cynthia agreed. "Almost as tragic as Peter's taste in sweets."
Cynthia and Sirius chuckled to themselves once more, but Alice, Jo, Remus, and Lily were able to contain themselves for Peter's sake. The poor boy was still bright red in the face and muttering wildly about different people having different tastes, unaware that no one was listening to him.
A small boy who was probably in first year tapped on Lily's shoulder. He was short, with bright red hair and a vast number of freckles, and he swung his arms as he spoke, obviously nervous. "Lily Evans?"
"Yes. Can I help you?" Lily asked, switching into Prefect mode much to the dismay of the now re-united Cynthia and Sirius.
"I'm Bill Weasley. I'm meant to ask for your help in Charms." The boy said quietly, his voice shaking out the words.
"Of course, Bill, I'd love to. How's Wednesday evenings after dinner?" Lily asked kindly, mentally running through her calendar.
"That would be good." Bill said with a shy smile.
"Then I'll see you then, alright?"
With a quick thank-you, Bill scurried off to join his first-year friends, and Lily had a feeling of satisfaction, helping someone in need. Cynthia shook her head distastefully at Lily's pleased expression.
"Honestly, Lily." Cynthia said, shaking her head and helping herself to more pumpkin juice. "I don't know how you get fulfillment out of helping some thick first years learn a levitating spell."
"I'm helping them, Cyn. Knowing they'll do better in a subject because of me makes me feel helpful." Lily reasoned.
"If that floats your boat." Cyn muttered.
James entered the hall quite late into breakfast, having slept in after staying up half the night compiling a list of things he knew about Lily. It now had a mighty 20 tidbits of information, including her favourite Quidditch team, favourite flavour of Bertie Botts, what her family was like, and other things he had learned from their conversation. He sat down next to Lily and gave her a quick smile before helping himself to some eggs and bacon.
"James," Lily said quietly as the rest of the group moved on to other topics of discussion, such as Peter's hopelessness at Astronomy.
"Yeah?" James replied, looking up from his breakfast.
"I wanted to apologize." Lily said slowly.
James frowned. "For what?"
"For calling you names and judging you when I didn't really know anything about you." Lily said softly, causing James's face to light up in a smile.
"No, really Lily, most of it I deserved." James insisted.
"But it was really daft of me – " Lily began, before James placed a finger on her lips to silence her.
"I'll forgive you if you finally give me a chance and go out with me."
Lily's eyes widened. She could feel her heart wrenching about in her chest. James was looking at her so hopefully, and she truly did want to give him a chance, he was getting so much better... "I'm afraid you can't forgive me, James. I'm sorry, I can't." Lily stood abruptly, grabbing her bags and swiftly exiting the hall. Alice looked at James curiously, before gathering her things and following.
She found Lily hunched against the wall up by the Prefect's Bathroom, sobbing quietly. Joining her friend on the floor, Alice rubbed Lily's back quietly, waiting for Lily to be ready to speak. After a few minutes of Lily sobbing, Alice spoke softly.
"What's wrong Lils?"
"James, he asked me out again... And this time I actually wanted to say yes, but I can't!" Lily said sadly, looking at Alice and wiping the tears from her eyes. "The worst part is, I can't tell him why I can't go out with him."
"Aww Lils, I'm sorry." Alice pulled her friend into a hug, and they remained in such a position for most of first period Potions. Alice whispered softly to Lily, while Lily sobbed and tried to remember exactly what the contract had said, and how she might find a loophole to telling James about it.