Ah…. Well, this is my first attempt at a Yaoi/shonen-ai fic, and I'm kind of nervous… The basic plot takes place after the battle with Haku and Zabuza. What I'm really trying is to build a relationship between Sasuke and Naruto this chapter and next (and perhaps the one after… sigh), then I have plans on skipping ahead to the future. I am kind of upset, because the plot isn't moving as quickly as I would have liked, but I decided to put the first chapter out to see if I had any reason to keep writing (in other words, Please review!). FYI, There is also a Kakashi Iruka element to the story.

Embrace of Solitude: Part One?

The sun rose gently over the morning sky, lazily seeping into the shadows and corners, working the darkness out. Naruto squinted in frustration as the sun found its way into his small apartment. Defiantly he rolled over and tried to push the inevitable away, but the sun persisted, and eventually won out, as Naruto dragged his weary eyes open. "Morning, huh?" He said in a dead-pan tone. Ever since that day, two weeks ago, he had secretly been wishing that one day he could just go to bed and not wake up again... Not that he'd been getting more than a couple hours of sleep a night at most.

Naruto shook the unhappy thoughts from his head as he forced himself through his daily routine. Off with the old clothes, on with the new... Sniff... They were starting to reek. 'Of course, I haven't done any laundry since we got back, unless that smell is..." He looked around. The apartment looked as bad as he felt. Week-old Raman cups lay here or there, none of them were eaten. At least he was making the effort to prepare the food. It was an improvement from last week.

Dressing quickly, he stepped out of his apartment. Once it had felt like the only refuge he had in an uncaring, lonely world. The only place to really be by himself, but recently he was thinking too much to be comfortable alone. Visions of death haunted his waking mind. Zabuza, Haku… and Sasuke... Over and over his mind played these visions, and there was something more. The fox's power flowing through him, the desire to kill, the ability to kill- Naruto shook his head before allowing the dark thoughts to enter his mind again. Anything would be better than that.

As Naruto passed through the Market Place he heard the familiar whispers, "Look, it's THAT kid..."

"Shush, he'll hear you..."

"He's so... shabby-looking. Why doesn't he take care of himself?"

"It probably has to do with the you-know-what, I can't imagine that animals take very good care of..."

"Hush! You'll get in trouble!"

Yes, anything was better than that, but not by much. Still, when he was around others he could distract himself. As he would have before, Naruto ignored the woman's gossip, pasting a large, false grin on his face he approached the bridge that he was due to meet the rest of his team at. Distractions... That was what he needed, especially from-

"Ohayo, Sakura-Chan!" Naruto waved energetically, blocking the thoughts. Sakura waved back to him, somewhat less enthusiastic. As usual, Sakura and Sasuke were already there, Kakashi-sensei was nowhere to be seen.

"Mou... Where is Kakashi-sensei? He's really late today." Sakura moaned sadly.

Naruto smiled really big, 'Time to do what we do everyday.' "He's always late! What do you suppose he does? Maybe he's peeping at the ladies bath..."

"No way!" Sakura said, in shock. "He would never do something like..."

"Yeah, but he's always reading that perverted book..." Naruto insisted. 'Thank God... I can think about this, I don't need to remember. Not while I'm with them.'

"Dobe." Sasuke's cold voice broke in. "that's something you would do."

"I would not!" Naruto's voice rose high, "Sasuke, teme..." 'Why did you save me..? I hated you... I never asked for your help... NO!' With tremendous effort Naruto pushed the thoughts back down. 'No.' He thought again, calmer. He pointed his finger at Sasuke. "You bastard! What do you know about anything?" In typical over done Naruto fashion he began storming around, making a fuss.

Sakura raised her hands. "Come on, Naruto, he was only joking. Ne, Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke glared at Naruto, death in his eyes. "You got a problem with it?" His body moved ever so slightly, proclaiming he was ready to fight.

Naruto's eyes gleamed, "I'm ready." Inwardly he was sighing. He really didn't care what Sasuke said, in fact the truth was that he HAD snuck into the ladies Baths a few times to master his Sexy-no-Jutsu and to help Konohamaru master his. But before that mission he would never have let that remark go unanswered. He couldn't let his teammates know that something was wrong. He couldn't.

"Ohayo!" Kakashi appeared between the two boys. "I'm sorry I was late, I saw a kitten drowning on my way here and-"

Naruto and Sakura yelled in unison, "Liar!"

"Well, then..." Kakashi's eye smiled at his students. "How about some training for today?"

"Hai!" Naruto called loudly, running quickly to Kakashi. "Ano sa, ano sa, where are we gonna train? Huh? Huh?"

"Well, I figured we'd go into the East Forest a bit and-"

"Great!" Naruto jumped into the air and spun in the direction of the East forest. "Sakura-chan, watch me beat Sasuke there!" As the words were said Naruto was already running far ahead of the group.

"Heh." Sasuke grunted, but was that a hint of a smile Sakura saw on his face? "Baka." Sasuke leapt after the yellow haired boy quickly.

Kakashi shrugged and followed at a lazy pace, and Sakura folded her hands in front of her and followed her sensei. "Ano... Sensei?"

"Yes, Sakura-chan?"

She fidgeted slightly. "Have you noticed... Anything weird... About Sasuke recently?"

Kakashi rolled his hidden eye. Sasuke? Yeah, he'd been acting weird. He was worried about the change in Naruto, for Sasuke that was amazingly strange. He wondered briefly if all young girls were like this, or just the ones obsessed with Sasuke. "No, I wouldn't say weird. At least, not any weirder than normal." He smiled kindly at her.

"Oh..." Sakura trailed off slowly. She squinted her eyes, the boys weren't even in seeing distance any longer. "Shouldn't we try and catch up?" Kakashi didn't answer. "Sensei?" Sakura asked again and again she was denied a reply, she stared at the older man in frustration. What was he looking at, anyway? Following the Jounin's eye she saw a large group of Ninja hopefuls. In the front of the group stood Iruka-Sensei. "Oi! Kakashi!" Iruka called, waving his hands.

"Good morning, Iruka-sensei." Kakashi's visible eyes was curved happily. "My team is ready when you are."

"Great! Just let me..." Iruka's eyes traveled over his young students before flashing back to Kakashi. "Speaking of your team... Where's Naruto and Sasuke?"

Kakashi's eye curved again, "They went on ahead."

Iruka smiled and nodded. "Let's go catch up with them, then. It's been so long since I've seen Naruto..."

Inner Sakura was boiling with anger. What was this? It didn't take someone of her genius caliber to tell that there was a level to this conversation that wasn't being spoken. 'WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?'

Sasuke smirked as he easily passed up Naruto and arrived at the forest first. "Oi, dobe, who was going to beat me here?"

Naruto stuck his tong out at the other boy, then looked around. "Heh, doesn't matter... Sakura-chan and Kakashi-sensei aren't here yet!" He folded his arms behind his head.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You're planning on lying to them, aren't you?"

Naruto flashed him an innocent and at the same time devilish grin.

"Huh, see if I care." He watched as Naruto grinned at him deviously. 'He's acting the same as before...' Sasuke followed Naruto out of the corner of his eye, feigning disinterest as the boy pointed at something in the river. 'But that's all it is... acting. Is he still hurting from that mission?' Unbidden the memories surfaced to his mind. The tree climbing training, saving Naruto from the first set of enemies they encountered, the final battle against that boy... The battle in which he almost lost his life trying to save Naruto. Naruto's smile when he realized that Sasuke hadn't really died... Sasuke smiled slightly. These were the thoughts that flashed into his mind whenever he had nothing else to keep himself occupied. He glanced quickly at his blonde teammate... 'I guess I have a... friend...' His countenance darkened as he let that thought roll through his mind. Friends were a needless complication.

"Oi, Sasuke! Look at that stupid-looking fish!" Naruto waved his hands at his teammate. "Doesn't it kinda look like Iruka-sensei?"

"Baka!" Sasuke watched as the old, kind, carefree look returned to Naruto's face and then drained away, letting him glimpse momentarily the darkness that must be plaguing the young ninja. Then the mask was firmly back in place. 'Then again... maybe a little complication wouldn't be so bad right now... for him either.'

"BASTARD, SASUKE!" Naruto's annoyance was growing. It was bad enough to have to play this happy charade; did he really have to take Sasuke's insults, too? He wanted to just walk away, but he'd never do that. Never just walk away. Not if he wanted to be Hokage... Maybe he should have just stayed home today. He was feeling kind of dizzy- NO! With a shake of his head he balled his fists.

"You wanna do something about it?"

"Anytime!" Naruto growled as he jumped into the air. 'My body... So tired...'

Sasuke moved to intercept. 'Does that idiot really think that he could beat me with those kind of openings?' He easily jumped over Naruto's head, slamming his fist into the back of the blonde boy's head. "Too slow!" Naruto's body went slamming into the ground, hitting it with a sickening thud. Sasuke landed a few feet away from the other boy, still in defensive pose. "Oi! Come on! Are you just gonna lie there?" Naruto remained on the ground, showing no signs of motion. "Come on, you think I'd fall for that old trick? You're such a coward... GET UP AND FIGHT ME!" After a long, unresponsive pause, Sasuke finally began to worry. "Oi! Naruto..." He cautiously walked closer to his enemy's body. He was breathing, but it was shallow, his face had dropped the mask, pain etched itself across the suddenly fragile looking features-

The sound of shuffling in the trees reminded Sasuke of his approaching sensei, "Kakashi-sensei! Something's wrong with Naru-"

Before the words were completely out of his mouth both Kakashia and Iruka were jumping into view. Iruka jumped quickly to Naruto's side. Sakura jumped from a tall tree branch as well, looking at Sasuke with worried eyes be fore glancing to Naruto. "Is he OK, Iruka-sensei?"

Iruka looked up at Sakura. "He just has a small bump on his head. It's nothing compared to the kind of beatings he gets for fooling around. I think Naruto just passed out from exhaustion." He glanced at Kakashi. "Has he been sleeping recently? He looks like he hasn't been eating, either."

Kakashi gently pried the boy from Iruka's grip. "Hai, well, I'll just take him to the hospital now, shall I?"

Iruka gave Kakashi a dark look as the Jounin carried Naruto away. "I'll meet you there in an hour." Turning to his students with an apologetic smile he said, "Gomen, mina, but we'll have to end training here for today."

A little boy with a ridiculously long scarf stepped up, "Iruka-sensei? Is Naruto-niicahn going to be OK?" Sakura nodded. That was Konohamaru, Naruto's little playmate.

Iruka smiled and nodded, "The doctors will be able to help him, Konohamaru."

"Demo..." the boy insisted, "He looked really sad..." The boy fixed his gaze on Sasuke. Finger out stretched, he called, "This must be your fault! Kisama! Naruto-nii wouldn't loose to someone like you!"

"Ma, ma!" Iruka stepped in, holding his hands up in a pacifying gesture. "Sasuke had nothing to do with this, Konohamaru. Naruto is just a little sick, ne, Sasuke-kun?"

"Whatever." Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Sasuke turned in the direction of town.

"Hey, wait up, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura called, chasing after him quickly.

Iruka looked at his dozen students. 'I somehow got left taking the kids home alone.' With a sigh he began rounding the children up.

Sasuke growled in annoyance. Two hours had passed and the idiot Sakura girl was still following him. He had been hoping to loose her and then head to the hospital, but if she hadn't given up yet, he was starting to loose hope. Of course, he could have just hid from her, but... She might cheer up Naruto. That decided Sasuke turned in the direction of the hospital.

"Where are we going, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked, slightly annoyed. The only thing in that direction was the hospital, and, although she was worried about Naruto, she wasn't eager to end her personal time with Sasuke...

"I want to see how Naruto's doing." Sasuke said in a tone that implied she really need not follow.

"Yeah..." Sakura was slightly shaken by his tone. "I'm worried about him, too." Sakura followed the dark haired boy, not really paying attention to what was around her. 'He's with me and he's thinking about Naruto! What the Hell?' Inner Sakura stormed, but part of her knew, to Sasuke, who cared only for power, Naruto was far more valuable than she was. Sakura was so lost in her own thought that when Sasuke suddenly stopped walking she slammed right into his back. "Sa-" Her words were cut short by a hand over her mouth.

Sasuke put his finger to his lips, then pointed around the corner of the hospital. Sakura's eyes landed on Kakashi and Iruka. Motioning for her to be quiet, Sasuke crept closer to the two men, who were apparently in heated discussion.

"Two weeks, Kakashi." Iruka said, in a tone filled with emotion. "Two weeks since he ate. At least. Considering his high constitution, I'd bet it's been more like a month. And he hasn't been sleeping..." As they crept closer Sakura thought she could see the man shaking.

Kakashi placed his hand on the other man's shoulder. "It's not your fault, Iruka-"

Iruka shook the gloved hand off. "Don't tell me that. I'm the closest thing to family that boy's ever had, and I didn't notice that he needed me? How could I have missed something like him not eating? How long has it been since I bothered to stop by his place to check up on him? How long since I treated him to some ramen? Gods! I'm so stupid. I've been so busy with... everything else that I neglected the only person that really needs me."

"That's not true." Kakashi said gently.

Iruka glared at him defiantly. "No? I've been a terrible brother figure to Naruto recently. Do you know how much PAIN just existing must cause for him? The adults in this town treat him like a monster, the children learn and react to their parents fears. But I've never heard him complain, never seen him cry... Not about what he should feel really upset about. The loveless childhood, the hatred directed at him, just because the people of this town are terrified of what he reminds them of..." Sakura could definitely see the man shaking now, large tears poured freely down his face.

Kakashi's arms snaked out and encircled Iruka, the shorter man accepted the embrace. "Don't blame yourself, Iruka. Please." Kakashi's voice also sounded filled with emotion. "Don't regret what we've worked so hard to build this last month..."

"I don't regret my time with you, Kakashi, really, but... Couldn't I have had time for both? There's room in my heart for more than one person, right?"

"I hope so," Kakashi responded, voice a little lighter. "because I don't want to be pushed out." Sakura's eyes widened in surprise.

Iruka gave a teary laugh. "Small chance of that happening." He wrapped his arms around the taller man's neck.

"I certainly hope so, koi," Kakashi pulled his face mask down, "I hope so..."

Sakura felt a hot blush cover her face as she watched the two men lean together for a kiss. 'I-I shouldn't be watching this... I never knew that they... HOW THE HELL COULD I HAVE MISSED THAT THE TWO OF THEM WERE IN LOVE?' Sakura scrapped her jaw off the floor and glanced over at Sasuke. His face was collected as he motioned that they should leave the men alone, but there was a line in his forehead. Someone that spent as much time following and thinking about Sasuke as Sakura did knew that meant he was agitated about something. She wondered briefly, blushing furiously as she did so, if Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei's relationship bothered him.

Once they were a discrete, out of sight, distance from the lovers Sasuke turned to glare at Sakura. "Don't talk about this to anyone."

Taken slightly aback, she could only nod. He was being shorter than he usually was. "Good," Sasuke replied. "Go home. I want to talk to the moron alone." And with that Sasuke turned and left a bewildered Sakura standing at the entrance to the hospital. Her mind was too full for even Inner Sakura to put up a fight, so she turned and headed home, a blank look in her eyes, and a faint blush on her face.

Sasuke nodded. It was easier to get rid of that girl than he thought.

Naruto let the curtain fall from his hands as Kakashi and Iruka deepened their kiss.

"It's about time." Naruto jumped and spun around on his bed. The speaker was leaning against the door frame, arms crossed. "Don't you think?"

"Sasuke! Bastard! How dare you scare me like that?" Naruto screamed, finger aimed, mask slipping back into place.

"Stop it, idiot." Sasuke walked to the edge of Naruto's bed, tentatively sitting down.

Naruto's head dropped, for a moment Sasuke thought the boy was crying, but then he raised his eyes to stare strait at Sasuke. The usually detached boy's eyes widened in surprise, this was a completely different Naruto. The face was still the one he saw every day, but the expression, the eyes, so dark, so serious… so sorrowful... It was the first time Naruto ever lowered his defenses in Sasuke's presence. "Idiot? Yeah... I am." He moved his eyes away from Sasuke, glancing around the room without really taking anything in. "I guess I never said 'Thank you' for what you did for me that time. So..." He dragged his eyes back to Sasuke's face, and then bowed his head deeply. "Thank you." Rising his head back up, "But don't EVER do that again. You can't die until you acknowledge that I'm stronger than you."

"Heh." Sasuke was glad that even this Naruto preached the same thing. "It'll be a million years before you beat me if you keep acting like a moron." Noting the fact that Naruto seemed to understand what he meant Sasuke continued. "I'm not good with this sort of thing, but... You've been having problems since that mission, right?" Sasuke waited for some affirmation before continuing. "You're going to have to get used to it. In the future we will have to kill and watch people die, it's not avoidable. When we enter the Chonin exam we may meet people from other villages, later we may have to kill those we meet... One day we may even have to fight each other." Sasuke moved slightly closer to Naruto and sighed, "I guess what I'm getting at is it's not getting any easier from here on in. If you don't want to see people you care about getting hurt, stop here."

Naruto shook his head viciously. "I'll fight." A determination in his eyes froze Sasuke to the bed, shaking him to his very soul. "So that those I care about don't have to die. I don't want to ever see two people with so much life ahead of them die again, I don't want to ever see a child grow up alone because their parents were killed in some dumb battle, and I don't want to see you die by jumping in front of an attack that was meant for me. Ever again."

Sasuke watched helplessly as the blonde began to shake, burying his head in his knees. Tentatively, he reached a hand to touch the shaking boy's back. "I'm sorry."

Under the warmth of Sasuke's hand Naruto's body seemed to relax completely. He allowed Sasuke to push him backwards, so his back rested against the frame of the bed, and scooted over a bit. Sasuke immediately settled himself onto the bed next to the blonde. In no time, the exhausted boy's head had dropped onto Sasuke's shoulder; breathe evening out to that of a deep slumber.

Sasuke wasn't sure how long he sat that way, with a sleeping Naruto on his shoulder, but he found himself watching the boy's face. "He looks so angelic this way, doesn't he?" Sasuke managed to stop himself from jumping in surprise and glared at the intruding speaker.

Iruka was not about to let his former student intimidate him. "Thank you for sitting with him, Sasuke. You can go home now, if you want."

"What I want is some answers, but that can wait." Sasuke gave the sleeping Naruto a pointed glance, then returned his glare to Iruka, who magically had a Kakashi suddenly peek over his shoulder.

"Hai, Hai, Sasuke-kun." Kakashi intoned, pulling something shiny out of his vest. Sasuke's eyes widened as Kakashi snapped a quick photo of Naruto cuddling to Sasuke's chest.

A low growl emitted from Sasuke's lips, a warning of what he would do if Kakashi allowed that picture to be distributed. Kakashi laughed and held his hands up, "Don't worry Sasuke, this picture is for Iruka's eyes only. He was just commenting that he didn't have enough pictures of Naruto and now here he is, looking so angelic. I couldn't pass up the chance to make Iruka happy, now could I?" His only visible eye hadn't glanced at Sasuke once while he spoke, all his focus on Iruka's suddenly happy blush. With a small wave Kakashi escorted his companion out the door. "Maybe I'll make a copy of the picture for you. Later."

Sighing Sasuke settled a bit more comfortably in the hospital bed. "You know, Naruto, for someone that isn't used to sleeping around other people, you sure assimilated to it quickly."

Anyone who's reading this for the second or third time may notice that I have edited out my author's notes for this chapter. That was because, in the first chapter, I felt they were not necessary. I think they distract the readers… anyway, I'm in the process of re-editing each chapter, so I can re post them, that's all. By the way, when you finish this, make sure to read its sequel, Exodus!