"I know those two…I just can't seem to place them," Haldir said to Rumil, who was busily staring holes in the closed talan door. Cries and moans could be heard coming from the talan, and Rumil was NOT HAPPY. 

"I am NOT HAPPY," he said to Haldir, ignoring Haldir's previous comment. 

"You're not Sneezy, Doc, or Sleepy, either, but you remind me a great deal of both Grumpy and Dopey," Haldir remarked, whacking Rumil on the arm. "Will you PLEASE pay attention! I was saying that those two…whatever they were…are very familiar to me." 

"Have you seen them around the bathing pools? Maybe at the last Midsummer Festival?" Rumil said distractedly, still trying to see through the door of the talan. 

"No…let me think a minute…of course! That was Teleporno and Orgasm-O! It just so happens that I had a copy of just that particular comic go missing today…right after Celeborn left my talan!"  

"Celeborn? Really? I didn't think he was that, er…well endowed." 

"He'd have to be to keep Galadriel happy…anyone else would have to strap a two by four to his ass to keep from falling in that harlot's cavern." 

"Why would they be dressed up like two superheroes? And who's the Elf dressed as Orgasm-O?" 

"I'd be willing to bet next month's pay that it's Elrond…he's been having some problems with Celebrian. As for Celeborn…well, it's common knowledge that it's Galadriel's time of the year…when that woman goes on the rag, she's bloody dangerous." 

"So what's that got to do with my Elleth?" 

"Nothing in particular…they're just out to get their Elfhoods a workout." 

"Couldn't they possibly work-out with someone else's Elleth? I'm having enough problems with mine as it is." 

"Yeah, I heard about that…sorry, bro." 

"I've just been under a lot stress lately…it's no big deal." 

"Yeah, I've heard THAT too…" Haldir chuckled, earning a rather malevolent look from Rumil. "Listen little brother, why not let the gruesome twosome in there make your Elleth happy? It'll give you some time to recoup." 

Thoughtfully, Rumil pondered for a moment, then realized Haldir was right…the caped crusaders would take care of his Elleth's little problem, while Rumil could go soak in the baths and relax. Smiling, he gave Haldir the 'thumbs up' sign. Together, they climbed down the mallorn to the forest floor, whistling as they made their way to the baths. 

------------------------------------ 

When Celeborn and Elrond had finished with Rumil's Elleth, Celeborn flipped his cape dramatically behind him, pointing toward the roof of the talan, yelling, "To infinity…and beyond!" Rumil's Elleth was too busy panting and trying to regain rational thought to wonder at the rather bizarre exit speech. 

The two Elves approached the window of the talan, but, remembering their last attempt at drama, and the hard landing that followed, they opted to use the door.  

"We really need to come up with a better catch phrase and exit," Elrond said to Celeborn as they stood outside Rumil's Elleth's talan. "I also wanted to talk to you about my costume…these leggings are a pain in the ass to get up and down." 

"For Eru's sake, Elrond, stop complaining. No wonder my daughter threw you out if all you do is whine like this! Just take a knife and cut a hole in them." 

Celeborn put out a restraining hand, adding "I'd wait until after you've taken them off, Elrond." He gently took the knife from his friend's hand, shaking his head.  

"I think we should head to Rivendell now, Celeborn…Haldir seemed awfully suspicious…and Rumil did not seem happy at all…" Elrond commented as they made their way down to the forest floor. 

"I agree…it's time Rivendell was introduced to Teleporno and Orgasm-O! Dum Dum DUM!"  

"What the hell is 'Dum Dum DUM'? Elrond asked, his eyebrow shooting up above his mask 

"Theme music." 

"Oh." 

Together the two Elves walked toward the stables to get horses and supplies for their trip to Rivendell, singing their new theme music, taking little flying leaps along the way, their capes fluttering behind them.