Amy's office 7pm.
Amy is slumped in her chair, smothered in her robe. She's relieved that the day was so hectic. It didn't leave time to wonder about David. Or Bruce. Or the week of hell she endured over her ruling that left a boy to murder his family. She began to think of the family. They had sat in her courtroom. It pained her to think of what they suffered that evening. She was angry with herself. Why didn't she see through that boy? She had seen through so many others. She stopped that train of thought. Just as Bruce had said to her, she is just a judge who has to make decisions based on the facts and what instincts she has. She is not psychic; she has to work with what she's got. She remembers Bruce pointing out all the ones that she did get right. She does grieve for the family and even for the boy, but she is confident that she did the best job she could. It is a horrible way to learn a lesson, but it is a lesson that she won't have to learn twice. She remembers Bruce's words; she is not a good judge just because of what she knows or the work she does to prepare for cases, but also because of what she feels, how she takes the time to listen to all parties involved, outside of what is printed in a file. That is why Bruce really likes working for her: she is one of the few who give it their all.
Bruce...Amy's snaps up in her chair and looks at the clock. It's 7:30pm and she hasn't seen him since he adjourned the courtroom. She wonders, "Did he forget? I mean, he is the one who said we should talk this evening. He suggested making arrangements so we can talk." She gets up and takes off her robe then hangs it up. She thinks that maybe he is making arrangements somewhere else in the building outside of her office and she should respect the man's privacy. That doesn't stop her from worrying so she decides to look for him. She grabs her purse and heads for her door. Just then, it opens and Bruce walks in with "take-out" in his hands.
Amy is relieved and stands back. Bruce asks while standing in the doorway,
"Were you leaving?"
Amy answers him while putting her purse back and heading towards the couch,
"Yeah, I was going to look for you. You didn't tell me you were going for chinese."
Bruce replies as he walks in and gets the food organized,
"Sorry, my mind wasn't right. I took for granted that you understood that I would take care of all the arrangements for tonight. I should've called you since there wasn't time during the day but I've been on the phone with the restaurant, Winnie, and Rebecca. I ran right after court was adjourned so I could bring Rebecca to Winnie's and catch the restaurant on the way back –getting everything done within an hour, so you wouldn't have to wait too long."
He sits next to Amy on the couch. He looks at her; she smiles back at him with a questioning look. He can tell she is very interested in what he has to say. His nerves are all on edge. He has a lot to tell her but he isn't sure where to start and how much to really say. She deserves to know everything, but he's afraid to put her off by saying too much. He cares too much about her not have her in his life, and not be in hers. He realizes that part of his moodiness recently is because they haven't been involved like they usually are in each others lives. He loves her loyalty and how she always supports him. He even loves how she puts him in check when he needs it, even though he lashes out at her for it sometimes. He hates when he does that.... He decides to let her start some dialogue,
"So here we are."
Amy is smiling at him, a nervous smile. She is wondering if her rant this morning has put him off. She is scared that he will tell her something along the lines of ending their friendship. She feels so alone and considers him her only true friend in the world. Sure she has Donna, but it's not the same. Bruce comforts her. He always knows what she lacks and needs. She reminisces to when she broke up with Barry. Barry couldn't picture himself running away with her to Spain. But Bruce could -without Amy explaining a word to him. When her world falls apart, Bruce is always there to help her pick up the pieces. Sometimes he picks them all up for her. She thinks that if she were ever to have a soul mate; this is the man. However, everything is so wrong about them. He works for her, they've had to fight accusations of impropriety. She is white, he is black. He is very religious, she isn't. She believes love conquers all, he believes he should date within his race. Yet they have so many things in common. They both are single parents with daughters the same age. She wants a respectable father figure for her daughter as he would like an intelligent, compassionate woman as a mother for his daughter. For the most part, they share the same humor and ideals. More than anything else; they are always there for each other. She responds,
"Yep, here we are. I said a lot this morning and we had a busy day. Did you have a chance to take that all in? I understand if you need more time," she said, hoping that more time would prevent him from making a hasty decision. She really hoped that it sounded nicer than all the demands she had made in the morning. She buries her attention and energy into the chinese food.
"No Amy. We've really needed to talk for some time now. We've had a disastrous time every time we've tried to really talk about things lately. I know I apologized before but I want to tell you again. I'm sorry for being a jerk our last time out. I was in turmoil because of Mia and I took it out on you. You've done nothing but support me and have helped me make wise decisions when it comes to her. That was not a way of repaying a friend." He looks at her. She is gazing at him and he brings his guard down. Amy can always get to him. Just with a look. She is looking at him with wonder, compassion and understanding. He loves to look in her eyes.
"Well, thank you Bruce. But I accepted your apology before and nothings changed. ("God," she thinks and pauses, "No other man in my life always tries to make things right like he does.") It did hurt what you said to me that night, but I am completely over that. After all, it was the truth and I understand that you were going through a rough time. I know you were very angry because Rebecca is caught in the middle. I know you wish Mia would be more stable for her sake, if not for your own."
Amy reminisces to the time when Bruce was talking about not having a dinner date that evening and they decided to go out together. She remembers thinking there was a gleam in his eye when she had told him to consider it a date. Even though it ended abruptly, and on an unpleasant note, she had had so much fun and felt so at ease when it began. Regardless, he did give her a heartfelt apology the next day. She can't figure out why he brought it up now.
Bruce stops eating his food. He is so taken aback by how accurate Amy is. She can read him like a book. Mia did hurt him by yo-yoing him around. But what really affected him is how she just runs in and out of their Rebecca's life. Being with Amy, he doesn't understand how Mia doesn't have a stronger bond with their child. Amy would cross hell and high-water for Lauren. Mia is fortunate to remember Rebecca's birthday. He responds to Amy,
"Well enough of dates gone wrong between us; you had a few questions for me this morning. I have your answers. I don't know if they are what you want to hear. I also have some things that I'd like to say apart from your questions."
"Well why don't you start with what you want to say first, as long as you promise you'll answer my questions before we finish?,"
says Amy hoping she sounds as if she is being cooperative, in efforts to win Bruce over. She doesn't really understand why she feels compelled to do so. After all, he is just a friend.
"Uh ok. Covering a little on what you said this morning, I do consider myself your friend, as I consider you mine. I thought you should be the first to know that I finished my degree in Child Psychology."
Amy puts her food down and hugs Bruce.
"Congratulations! I am so happy for you. Are you going to a graduation ceremony? I'd love to see it!"
She picks up her food and continues eating. Bruce smiles and responds,
"Thanks but I feel a little too old to attend a graduation ceremony. I just want the diploma to put it to use. I'm applying for a few different jobs. I was hoping I could get a letter of recommendation from you. I think it would look great... (He trails off. He sees Amy distraught look) Amy you know I've been working on this degree. This is what I wanted to do in life."
Amy is trying to mask her pained look.
"I know, I know. You just caught me off guard. I am really happy for you. I'll just miss you, that's all."
Amy tries to bury herself in the food and avoid eye contact. Her eyes well up a little. She's stunned. One minute she thinks that Bruce wants to end the friendship, the next minute she realizes she won't even have him around at work. She starts to feel afraid and alone again. And very selfish. She tries to compose herself and gives Bruce a pathetic grin.
"Amy, I just said that I do consider myself your friend, as you, mine. Getting a job else where just means you have to have a lighter docket so you can fit me in you off time. We might even see each other during the work day. I might have to work on one of your cases. See, we still might have cases to discuss."
Bruce says, hoping to lift her spirits. He can tell she is devastated. He too is afraid that he will lose her. He knows the demands of her job and the little personal time she has. She fills it with her family and David. The only room she had for him before was basically the work day. He remembers that she did say things were officially done with McClaren.
"Amy, I'm just a phone call away."
"I know Bruce, I know. I hate to rain on your parade. It's just that I was just telling you that I need you as a friend and you basically just told me that you're on the verge of leaving me. I am happy for you. I want you to be happy. I support you on what ever you chose. I am just sad that I will see my friend a little less often. And I need you so much now."
Amy puts down her food and sulks into the side of the couch. Bruce also puts his food down but sits up and tries to look in her eyes as he replies.
"Because of McClaren?"
"Well not only because of David... Well mostly, yeah. He has me so confused Bruce. I don't have anyone to talk to that I trust their opinion. You never steer me wrong. I trust you. I really have needed to talk to you. I don't understand why my love life is off topic. It's the one thing that is always in the crapper. It's the one thing that I always should listen to you about, even though I usually don't."
She looks desperately in his eyes as he slumps and looks down.
"It's the one thing that I don't trust myself to give you good advice about. It's the one thing that I consider myself selfish with you,"
replies Bruce painfully. He looks back up into her eyes,
"Amy, I want for your happiness. I really do. But I don't think any man other than the son of God would be good for you. I don't know why the men you date can't treat you the way you deserve. And I feel helpless that I can't make them see you how they should. I know I am just your friend, and Lord knows I don't always treat you right but I think you are a really great lady, a wonderful woman. You deserve a lot more than what you have gotten in life. I wish Mia was half the woman you are. At least a tenth of the mother you are. I would feel better about Rebecca growing up. More secure. I feel privileged to have you in my life. Your friendship is one of the things I most value and treasure having. Your existence gives me hope for my daughter and myself. I still have hopes to find someone like you to spend the rest of my life with."
He wanted to say he wished he could be more than friends. He wanted to tell her that she is who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He wanted to grab her and kiss her passionately to express his true feelings. But he respected her too much. He had to see what she thought of all that he just said. He continued to gaze in her beautiful eyes. Amy was dumbfounded. She felt so flattered, so honored. This man, whom she thinks so highly of, thinks so highly of her. She knew he was fond of her; after all, they were friends, he was always there for her. But she had no idea that he felt this way. To say that he couldn't trust himself when it came to her love life, didn't that have other connotations? Was he just admitting to feeling something closer than just a friend? She knows he just called her a friend a bunch of times, but what he just said was out of that context... Wasn't it? She gazed into his eyes, filled with a whole different confusion than this morning, intoxicated by his words and his gaze. Amy wondered "God why doesn't he just ravish me now?
"Uhm, I am really honored... and flattered. I'm really touched by what you just said. Here I was wondering if I had driven you away somehow, if I was losing my best friend...."
She looked down and placed her hand on his thigh. She was surprised by the effect it had on her body to do so. She could feel his muscular leg and her mind drifted to images that friends would not do. She couldn't believe herself. She desperately desired Bruce in an intimate way. She was trying to think intelligently and put the thoughts out of her mind but they continued to infiltrate no matter how rationally she tried to put things into perspective. She could not rush into bed with a man right now. She hasn't even told David that things were over. But she torments herself thinking that Bruce isn't just any man. He is a man she's known for 5 years. Her best friend, who she has shared everything with, who has seen her on her worse days and best days. And she questions why David deserves so much damn courtesy when he doesn't give her any consideration. She is torn. She leans in, dying to know what Bruce is going to say to her next question.
"... I'm happy I was wrong. I understand that you don't think much about the men I date. They don't turn out to be good for me, but why did you say you consider yourself selfish when it comes to my love life? Is there really no man good enough for me or are you the only man good enough?"
She is amazed at how she got those words through. She realizes that she is clutching his thigh and loosens her grip as she looks back into his eyes, painfully waiting for an answer.
He puts his hands on her hands. They feel so warm and soft. He remembers each hug they've shared and how warm and soft they felt. He remembers the kiss they shared and how warm, soft and wet that felt. He stops himself before his mind takes him somewhere forbidden. But why, he questions, is it forbidden. He is about to work in another field. He will have a more respectable position and an income that would allow him to provide for her comfortably. He can't think of any reason why they must remain friends. Why they can't take things to another level. Then he remembers; they have turned blue in the face dispelling rumors that there was more between them. Not to mention, he told her not long ago that he doesn't believe in interracial relationships. He wants to smack himself for that. He does believe in black families but he can't deny how deeply he cares for Amy. He knows how loyal she is, perfect she is for him. They may not share the same race or religious views but they know each others quirks and see eye-to-eye on so much else. He would love Rebecca to have Amy as a role model. Amy is always so strong when he is by her side. And he would never leave her side. That is all he's ever wanted: a family. And he knows that all Amy's ever wanted is a man who understands her. So what is he so afraid of? He realizes that his gaze became a distant stare and holds her hands in his own as he tries to regain focus.
"Yeah. I can't have anything to do with your love life unless I am the one in it. It kills me to see you with another man. That's why I couldn't be at your wedding and why I can't discuss David McClaren. I've fallen out of like and into love with you. And I'm patiently waiting for the right time for us. When I get another job, and when you don't have another man on your mind... when you return my sentiments unconditionally. But in the meantime, we'll have to be friends who don't discuss our love lives."
He felt liberated and exhausted at the same time. It took everything he had to tell her that. To trust those feelings to someone. And it felt so new, and exciting -that she knew. It also felt incredibly frightening. What was she going to say? Maybe he read her wrong and she doesn't share his feelings. She might not even take him seriously; didn't he just tell her that he wouldn't date outside of his race? But she knows him better than anyone else. She must have read through him. He was almost trembling awaiting her response. Amy was so stunned and... aroused. She was sure her cheeks were as red as she felt hot. She can't believe what Bruce just said. Is he stupid? How could he question her feelings about him? Isn't it obvious how much she cares about him? Desires him? They kissed. She wasn't the one saying that she didn't have romantic feelings. She wasn't the one saying that she should not date interracially. That did pose a question. Why did he say that? It wasn't long ago. These feelings he stated couldn't have come over night. But who cares! I want to be with him. I trust him. I love him too. I love him more than any man I have ever loved in my life. I've known for years that I can't stand to be without him. That I am a better person with him in my life. I trust him more than I have ever trusted anyone before. She moved closer to him, keeping her hands in his, staring into his eyes, ready to tell him her feelings just when there was knock on the door.
They both jumped to opposite sides of the couch. Amy answers, "Come in." And in walks David McClaren.
Amy is slumped in her chair, smothered in her robe. She's relieved that the day was so hectic. It didn't leave time to wonder about David. Or Bruce. Or the week of hell she endured over her ruling that left a boy to murder his family. She began to think of the family. They had sat in her courtroom. It pained her to think of what they suffered that evening. She was angry with herself. Why didn't she see through that boy? She had seen through so many others. She stopped that train of thought. Just as Bruce had said to her, she is just a judge who has to make decisions based on the facts and what instincts she has. She is not psychic; she has to work with what she's got. She remembers Bruce pointing out all the ones that she did get right. She does grieve for the family and even for the boy, but she is confident that she did the best job she could. It is a horrible way to learn a lesson, but it is a lesson that she won't have to learn twice. She remembers Bruce's words; she is not a good judge just because of what she knows or the work she does to prepare for cases, but also because of what she feels, how she takes the time to listen to all parties involved, outside of what is printed in a file. That is why Bruce really likes working for her: she is one of the few who give it their all.
Bruce...Amy's snaps up in her chair and looks at the clock. It's 7:30pm and she hasn't seen him since he adjourned the courtroom. She wonders, "Did he forget? I mean, he is the one who said we should talk this evening. He suggested making arrangements so we can talk." She gets up and takes off her robe then hangs it up. She thinks that maybe he is making arrangements somewhere else in the building outside of her office and she should respect the man's privacy. That doesn't stop her from worrying so she decides to look for him. She grabs her purse and heads for her door. Just then, it opens and Bruce walks in with "take-out" in his hands.
Amy is relieved and stands back. Bruce asks while standing in the doorway,
"Were you leaving?"
Amy answers him while putting her purse back and heading towards the couch,
"Yeah, I was going to look for you. You didn't tell me you were going for chinese."
Bruce replies as he walks in and gets the food organized,
"Sorry, my mind wasn't right. I took for granted that you understood that I would take care of all the arrangements for tonight. I should've called you since there wasn't time during the day but I've been on the phone with the restaurant, Winnie, and Rebecca. I ran right after court was adjourned so I could bring Rebecca to Winnie's and catch the restaurant on the way back –getting everything done within an hour, so you wouldn't have to wait too long."
He sits next to Amy on the couch. He looks at her; she smiles back at him with a questioning look. He can tell she is very interested in what he has to say. His nerves are all on edge. He has a lot to tell her but he isn't sure where to start and how much to really say. She deserves to know everything, but he's afraid to put her off by saying too much. He cares too much about her not have her in his life, and not be in hers. He realizes that part of his moodiness recently is because they haven't been involved like they usually are in each others lives. He loves her loyalty and how she always supports him. He even loves how she puts him in check when he needs it, even though he lashes out at her for it sometimes. He hates when he does that.... He decides to let her start some dialogue,
"So here we are."
Amy is smiling at him, a nervous smile. She is wondering if her rant this morning has put him off. She is scared that he will tell her something along the lines of ending their friendship. She feels so alone and considers him her only true friend in the world. Sure she has Donna, but it's not the same. Bruce comforts her. He always knows what she lacks and needs. She reminisces to when she broke up with Barry. Barry couldn't picture himself running away with her to Spain. But Bruce could -without Amy explaining a word to him. When her world falls apart, Bruce is always there to help her pick up the pieces. Sometimes he picks them all up for her. She thinks that if she were ever to have a soul mate; this is the man. However, everything is so wrong about them. He works for her, they've had to fight accusations of impropriety. She is white, he is black. He is very religious, she isn't. She believes love conquers all, he believes he should date within his race. Yet they have so many things in common. They both are single parents with daughters the same age. She wants a respectable father figure for her daughter as he would like an intelligent, compassionate woman as a mother for his daughter. For the most part, they share the same humor and ideals. More than anything else; they are always there for each other. She responds,
"Yep, here we are. I said a lot this morning and we had a busy day. Did you have a chance to take that all in? I understand if you need more time," she said, hoping that more time would prevent him from making a hasty decision. She really hoped that it sounded nicer than all the demands she had made in the morning. She buries her attention and energy into the chinese food.
"No Amy. We've really needed to talk for some time now. We've had a disastrous time every time we've tried to really talk about things lately. I know I apologized before but I want to tell you again. I'm sorry for being a jerk our last time out. I was in turmoil because of Mia and I took it out on you. You've done nothing but support me and have helped me make wise decisions when it comes to her. That was not a way of repaying a friend." He looks at her. She is gazing at him and he brings his guard down. Amy can always get to him. Just with a look. She is looking at him with wonder, compassion and understanding. He loves to look in her eyes.
"Well, thank you Bruce. But I accepted your apology before and nothings changed. ("God," she thinks and pauses, "No other man in my life always tries to make things right like he does.") It did hurt what you said to me that night, but I am completely over that. After all, it was the truth and I understand that you were going through a rough time. I know you were very angry because Rebecca is caught in the middle. I know you wish Mia would be more stable for her sake, if not for your own."
Amy reminisces to the time when Bruce was talking about not having a dinner date that evening and they decided to go out together. She remembers thinking there was a gleam in his eye when she had told him to consider it a date. Even though it ended abruptly, and on an unpleasant note, she had had so much fun and felt so at ease when it began. Regardless, he did give her a heartfelt apology the next day. She can't figure out why he brought it up now.
Bruce stops eating his food. He is so taken aback by how accurate Amy is. She can read him like a book. Mia did hurt him by yo-yoing him around. But what really affected him is how she just runs in and out of their Rebecca's life. Being with Amy, he doesn't understand how Mia doesn't have a stronger bond with their child. Amy would cross hell and high-water for Lauren. Mia is fortunate to remember Rebecca's birthday. He responds to Amy,
"Well enough of dates gone wrong between us; you had a few questions for me this morning. I have your answers. I don't know if they are what you want to hear. I also have some things that I'd like to say apart from your questions."
"Well why don't you start with what you want to say first, as long as you promise you'll answer my questions before we finish?,"
says Amy hoping she sounds as if she is being cooperative, in efforts to win Bruce over. She doesn't really understand why she feels compelled to do so. After all, he is just a friend.
"Uh ok. Covering a little on what you said this morning, I do consider myself your friend, as I consider you mine. I thought you should be the first to know that I finished my degree in Child Psychology."
Amy puts her food down and hugs Bruce.
"Congratulations! I am so happy for you. Are you going to a graduation ceremony? I'd love to see it!"
She picks up her food and continues eating. Bruce smiles and responds,
"Thanks but I feel a little too old to attend a graduation ceremony. I just want the diploma to put it to use. I'm applying for a few different jobs. I was hoping I could get a letter of recommendation from you. I think it would look great... (He trails off. He sees Amy distraught look) Amy you know I've been working on this degree. This is what I wanted to do in life."
Amy is trying to mask her pained look.
"I know, I know. You just caught me off guard. I am really happy for you. I'll just miss you, that's all."
Amy tries to bury herself in the food and avoid eye contact. Her eyes well up a little. She's stunned. One minute she thinks that Bruce wants to end the friendship, the next minute she realizes she won't even have him around at work. She starts to feel afraid and alone again. And very selfish. She tries to compose herself and gives Bruce a pathetic grin.
"Amy, I just said that I do consider myself your friend, as you, mine. Getting a job else where just means you have to have a lighter docket so you can fit me in you off time. We might even see each other during the work day. I might have to work on one of your cases. See, we still might have cases to discuss."
Bruce says, hoping to lift her spirits. He can tell she is devastated. He too is afraid that he will lose her. He knows the demands of her job and the little personal time she has. She fills it with her family and David. The only room she had for him before was basically the work day. He remembers that she did say things were officially done with McClaren.
"Amy, I'm just a phone call away."
"I know Bruce, I know. I hate to rain on your parade. It's just that I was just telling you that I need you as a friend and you basically just told me that you're on the verge of leaving me. I am happy for you. I want you to be happy. I support you on what ever you chose. I am just sad that I will see my friend a little less often. And I need you so much now."
Amy puts down her food and sulks into the side of the couch. Bruce also puts his food down but sits up and tries to look in her eyes as he replies.
"Because of McClaren?"
"Well not only because of David... Well mostly, yeah. He has me so confused Bruce. I don't have anyone to talk to that I trust their opinion. You never steer me wrong. I trust you. I really have needed to talk to you. I don't understand why my love life is off topic. It's the one thing that is always in the crapper. It's the one thing that I always should listen to you about, even though I usually don't."
She looks desperately in his eyes as he slumps and looks down.
"It's the one thing that I don't trust myself to give you good advice about. It's the one thing that I consider myself selfish with you,"
replies Bruce painfully. He looks back up into her eyes,
"Amy, I want for your happiness. I really do. But I don't think any man other than the son of God would be good for you. I don't know why the men you date can't treat you the way you deserve. And I feel helpless that I can't make them see you how they should. I know I am just your friend, and Lord knows I don't always treat you right but I think you are a really great lady, a wonderful woman. You deserve a lot more than what you have gotten in life. I wish Mia was half the woman you are. At least a tenth of the mother you are. I would feel better about Rebecca growing up. More secure. I feel privileged to have you in my life. Your friendship is one of the things I most value and treasure having. Your existence gives me hope for my daughter and myself. I still have hopes to find someone like you to spend the rest of my life with."
He wanted to say he wished he could be more than friends. He wanted to tell her that she is who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He wanted to grab her and kiss her passionately to express his true feelings. But he respected her too much. He had to see what she thought of all that he just said. He continued to gaze in her beautiful eyes. Amy was dumbfounded. She felt so flattered, so honored. This man, whom she thinks so highly of, thinks so highly of her. She knew he was fond of her; after all, they were friends, he was always there for her. But she had no idea that he felt this way. To say that he couldn't trust himself when it came to her love life, didn't that have other connotations? Was he just admitting to feeling something closer than just a friend? She knows he just called her a friend a bunch of times, but what he just said was out of that context... Wasn't it? She gazed into his eyes, filled with a whole different confusion than this morning, intoxicated by his words and his gaze. Amy wondered "God why doesn't he just ravish me now?
"Uhm, I am really honored... and flattered. I'm really touched by what you just said. Here I was wondering if I had driven you away somehow, if I was losing my best friend...."
She looked down and placed her hand on his thigh. She was surprised by the effect it had on her body to do so. She could feel his muscular leg and her mind drifted to images that friends would not do. She couldn't believe herself. She desperately desired Bruce in an intimate way. She was trying to think intelligently and put the thoughts out of her mind but they continued to infiltrate no matter how rationally she tried to put things into perspective. She could not rush into bed with a man right now. She hasn't even told David that things were over. But she torments herself thinking that Bruce isn't just any man. He is a man she's known for 5 years. Her best friend, who she has shared everything with, who has seen her on her worse days and best days. And she questions why David deserves so much damn courtesy when he doesn't give her any consideration. She is torn. She leans in, dying to know what Bruce is going to say to her next question.
"... I'm happy I was wrong. I understand that you don't think much about the men I date. They don't turn out to be good for me, but why did you say you consider yourself selfish when it comes to my love life? Is there really no man good enough for me or are you the only man good enough?"
She is amazed at how she got those words through. She realizes that she is clutching his thigh and loosens her grip as she looks back into his eyes, painfully waiting for an answer.
He puts his hands on her hands. They feel so warm and soft. He remembers each hug they've shared and how warm and soft they felt. He remembers the kiss they shared and how warm, soft and wet that felt. He stops himself before his mind takes him somewhere forbidden. But why, he questions, is it forbidden. He is about to work in another field. He will have a more respectable position and an income that would allow him to provide for her comfortably. He can't think of any reason why they must remain friends. Why they can't take things to another level. Then he remembers; they have turned blue in the face dispelling rumors that there was more between them. Not to mention, he told her not long ago that he doesn't believe in interracial relationships. He wants to smack himself for that. He does believe in black families but he can't deny how deeply he cares for Amy. He knows how loyal she is, perfect she is for him. They may not share the same race or religious views but they know each others quirks and see eye-to-eye on so much else. He would love Rebecca to have Amy as a role model. Amy is always so strong when he is by her side. And he would never leave her side. That is all he's ever wanted: a family. And he knows that all Amy's ever wanted is a man who understands her. So what is he so afraid of? He realizes that his gaze became a distant stare and holds her hands in his own as he tries to regain focus.
"Yeah. I can't have anything to do with your love life unless I am the one in it. It kills me to see you with another man. That's why I couldn't be at your wedding and why I can't discuss David McClaren. I've fallen out of like and into love with you. And I'm patiently waiting for the right time for us. When I get another job, and when you don't have another man on your mind... when you return my sentiments unconditionally. But in the meantime, we'll have to be friends who don't discuss our love lives."
He felt liberated and exhausted at the same time. It took everything he had to tell her that. To trust those feelings to someone. And it felt so new, and exciting -that she knew. It also felt incredibly frightening. What was she going to say? Maybe he read her wrong and she doesn't share his feelings. She might not even take him seriously; didn't he just tell her that he wouldn't date outside of his race? But she knows him better than anyone else. She must have read through him. He was almost trembling awaiting her response. Amy was so stunned and... aroused. She was sure her cheeks were as red as she felt hot. She can't believe what Bruce just said. Is he stupid? How could he question her feelings about him? Isn't it obvious how much she cares about him? Desires him? They kissed. She wasn't the one saying that she didn't have romantic feelings. She wasn't the one saying that she should not date interracially. That did pose a question. Why did he say that? It wasn't long ago. These feelings he stated couldn't have come over night. But who cares! I want to be with him. I trust him. I love him too. I love him more than any man I have ever loved in my life. I've known for years that I can't stand to be without him. That I am a better person with him in my life. I trust him more than I have ever trusted anyone before. She moved closer to him, keeping her hands in his, staring into his eyes, ready to tell him her feelings just when there was knock on the door.
They both jumped to opposite sides of the couch. Amy answers, "Come in." And in walks David McClaren.