Hope of the Phoenix (18/21)
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Remus Lupin/ Petunia Dursley
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all the characters and settings, plots, etc., within the books all belong to J.K. Rowling. I am just borrowing them for fun, not funds, and no copyright infringement is intended
A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews for Chapter 17! Glad you enjoyed it...I had a little trouble writing it, which was why it was so long in coming...Thank you in particular to [insert name here] who suggested that I have Petunia kidnapped. That is a really great idea. Unfortunately, it doesn't fit into my plans for Part One, but I haven't completely plotted out parts Two, Three and Four yet, so if Petunia gets kidnapped, you'll all know whom to thank! And for chapter 18, a big thanks once again to my lovely beta Tsuchi, who helped me figure out the action sequences in this chapter. Hugs Tsuchi. On with chapter 18! Oh, yeah: the bit Moody says about points is a parody of Chretien's 2003 commentary on national television – when asked about the "facts" brought by Colin Powell on the Iraq war, he said, and I quote, "They were facts, and a fact is a fact, and that's a fact". Also, I have used Author's prerogative to extend the presidency of Iceland's Vigdis Finnbogadottir into June 1996, even though her term ended in April – I needed another female European leader!
Chapter 18: Check and Checkmate!
The day of the fake conference dawned bright and clear. The notice of the secret postponement had gone out the night before, and the Daily Prophet, at least, had not had wind of the change. There it was on the front page, "M.D.A Meeting with Muggle Leaders, Stop the Death Eaters!" Molly had shown her the item in Witch Weekly the previous week, about her, about her connection with Harry, and the work that the M. D. A. was doing. She felt a distinct knotting in her stomach, which made eating the fancy breakfast Molly was trying to force into her impossible.
She felt incredibly nervous. So much was at stake with this conference: not only her own life, but the survival of both the wizarding and the real world as well. That was a lot of pressure for one housewife to handle. Across from her, Remus gave her a tired smile, but his eyes showed the same apprehension that had taken up residence in her stomach.
Molly was cooking for all the Order Members with the same fevered activity that Petunia used to throw into cleaning her house – Molly was clearly worried too. Percy was sitting quietly, not even boasting about how this conference was so important he'd taken time off work...and Tonks was knocking things over much worse than usual...even Kingsley didn't seem to be quite his usual imperturbable self.
Professors McGonagall and Snape arrived just as the others were finishing breakfast. The students were writing exams in their other subjects (Dumbledore had been very careful not to schedule any Transfiguration or Potions exams for the day of the conference, as he needed all of the Order Members to be there), so McGonagall and Snape were able to come.
At nine o'clock, Moody, with many warnings, cast impersonation charms on all the Members of the Order. They would be impersonating the foreign delegates, while the Ministry members whom Dumbledore trusted enough to let them in on the plan would be acting as the members of the Press.
Petunia turned to Remus, intending to ask him who he would be impersonating, and received one of the biggest shocks of her recent life. She was no longer standing next to Remus Lupin, but to Bill Clinton, President of the United States of America. She supposed it was easier for them to transform Remus into the American President, because of the grey hair.
Moody, who had regained normal eyes, and the rest of his nose, but had retained his gash of a mouth, was busy marshalling all of the Order Members into line. Tonks was giggling at him – arguing that the point of impersonation was to act like the person you were trying to imitate.
Petunia wasn't the only one to start laughing – the whole room of faux dignitaries burst into fits of nervous giggles (except Snape, of course), when Moody suddenly adopted a faultless French Canadian accent, and deadpanned:
"Me, I have a point – and the point of having a point is to have a point, that's the whole point."
Suddenly Prime Minister Chrétien glared at all the laughing prime ministers and presidents, and, grimacing, burst out "Constant Vigilance!" – which only made them laugh the harder.
Petunia had ordered limousines from a Muggle company, and the whole crowd, with appropriate press coverage from outside of the convention center, made their way to the vast building they had rented for the conference.
When they entered the building, Petunia noticed that the crowd of Ministry allies that Dumbledore had got to impersonate the Press were already there, and from the shape of the gun holder of one of the security guards, it looked like they were Ministry wizards – real guns were not that thin and narrow – it had to be a wand, bewitched to look like a gun.
At the end of the hall was a long table, set in front of all the flags; Petunia noted that her seat was set in the center, between the Stars and Stripes and the Union Jack. Amid applause and camera flashes from the members of the Press, the Order Members made their way to the head table.
They had taken their seats, and after a welcoming speech from Petunia – during which she thanked all the participating countries, and spoke to the importance of being united against this new terrorist group, the "members of the Press" started asking questions.
"Mrs. Dursley, have the represented countries already agreed to support the M.D.A. and the British Government in fighting the Death Eaters?"
"Mrs. Dursley, what exactly does the M in the M.D.A. stand for? And what is a Muggle?"
"President Clinton, is the United States prepared to provide monetary assistance in this fight against these new terrorists?"
"Mrs. Dursley, are you prepared to die?"
This shocking questioned suddenly silenced the crowd. Petunia could sense Remus and Arthur, on either side of her, tense in anticipation – she could almost feel their thoughts, the room seemed to be throbbing with it –"Here it comes".
The ceiling lights began to flicker, a terrifying mist suddenly spread out from the center – thick and green and completely unnatural – and then the Death Eaters burst out of the fog – dozens of them, black clad, mask wielding. The "members of the Press", playing their role well, screamed and scrambled for the doors – which they found magically sealed.
Then, the battle began. The Order Members drew out their wands – and joined the fray. The Members of the Press drew out their wands, too. The Death Eaters realized that they weren't fighting a bunch of helpless Muggles, prepared to do real fighting. Petunia could hear the Death Eater in the center shouting out orders. It was the most surreal sight Petunia had ever seen – she had never taken LSD; but if she had had to imagine what an acid trip might look like, this would come close to it. President Clinton, fighting side by side with Prime Minister Major, was taking on several Death Eaters at once. In other corners of the room, Prime Minister Jean Chrétien, awfully spry for a man of his age, quickly defeated two more Death Eaters and rushed to help Irish President Mary Robinson, who was surrounded. The Anzacs: Prime Ministers Paul Keating and Jim Bolger, were making short work of several more Death Eaters. Members of the Press were battling fiercely – Petunia found it difficult to follow any of the action. Spells flew everywhere, chairs tossed to the side, banged against the wall.
Petunia froze suddenly. Before her eyes, she saw a purple spell hit Vigdis Finnbogadottir in the chest – 'Minerva!' her mind screamed. She saw Nelson Mandela sprinting over to her side, taking out the Death Eater leaning over Minerva/Vigdis – she rose, hoping to help – to do something – when she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. She found herself forced backwards onto the table, felt a wand tip at her throat, was face to face with a lurid mask.
"This is check, 'Aunt Petunia'." The voice, a woman's voice, was mocking. "We may not be able to get Potter as long as he lives with you – but you won't be alive for long, and then Harry Potter will be all ours. He will be joining his Mudblood mother and blood Traitor father soon enough, but for now, you get to go and visit your fat son, and your useless husband."
Petunia's mind was screaming at her. She had to get away, escape. Her hands, behind her, scrambled across the table, searching for purchase, something, anything, to hold on to, to get away from this terrible woman, laughing at her misery...She felt a dash of cold water across her hand, and then, a pull on her stomach. Her head felt all a muddle. Had the Death Eater killed her already – was dying really this uncomfortable? But no – something was happening, the hall was disappearing! Was she being kidnapped?
The hall was vanishing in a swirl of colours – and then, with the Death Eaters wand still at her throat, Petunia found herself crashing onto a hard stone floor. Looking around her, trying to get her bearings on this new place she'd come to, she saw a frying pan, sitting on top of an antiquated stove, a large wooden table...
She heard the Death Eater hiss, "I know this place" – and then, her instinct taking advantage of the Death Eater's sudden distraction, she seized the frying pan from the stove, and swung it as hard as she could at the Death Eater's head. With the part of her mind that was still rational, she saw the Death Eater crumple; but her arms, powered by fear, fury and adrenaline, were still swinging. She was distantly aware of screaming at the prone woman, something about Lily, and James, and Vernon, and Dudley, and Sirius, her parents...
"And this is for trying to hurt Harry, you monster!" She swung back with the pan, and found that she couldn't move it. Someone was holding it. Someone who was now commenting dryly, "I believe, Petunia, that she is already unconscious." She turned, and saw Dumbledore holding her pan. Beyond him, at the door leading into the kitchen at Grimmauld Place, mouths open, eyes wide, were Ron, Hermione, Neville and Harry. Harry looked just as shocked as his friends – but his eyes were shining with pride.
Putting down her frying pan, Petunia stooped down beside the unconscious Death Eater. She whispered, "Checkmate" softly, and ripped off the mask...
TBC