A/N:Well, here it is chapter 2. This chapter actually took me a lot longer then I expected, because my personal life kinda got in the way, I'm in the school band, and were practicing a piece called "Aztec sunrise"..(I play ze clarinet .) and we have to have it pat down before Christmas break. This will be the last chapter, unless other ideas pop into my head(eh, which I highly doubt.. . ). I really hope the ending is uh ending material...And yes, there will be a song in this chapter, It took me longer to find one that fitted the mood, but in the end I picked "Stupid" by Sarah McLachlan, I just really found that it fitted Rukia'sPOV. I want to thank my reviewers, hopefully this chapter will be better. So anywayz I think that's it, so enjoy!
Once again, thank you my reviewers!
Disclaimer: Ok, brace yourselves, this may take you awhile to grasp this but I don't own bleach! I know shocking, isn't it? Whoa!
Misunderstood
Chapter 2:
(Same flash back, different POV)
Rukia's POV:
I don't get it, yet I've seem to become a part of it. Just another letter in the word. And somehow its not the first time, it's always this same shit. Same feeling, same face, just different situations. Love, its in disguise, beating me, beating me, beating me, down. I could lie, and say that this feeling, its just another emotion that I've developed from these humans. But I'm not like that, and so I slowly raise from the ground, leaving the lies behind, leaving them to argue with the ashes. And I wish it was all that easy, but it isn't.
It's not just another emotion that I've developed from these humans...
Its a feeling that I've developed for this human.
So I walk. Walk towards what I might want. What I might need. What I might love. Its not what I planned, it never is. My inner self screaming to my thoughts.
I don't need him.
I don't want him.
I can't help it.
I can help it.
I need him.
I want him.
I .....love him...?
Through the dust and grime, I see him.
I know,
I need him.
Though I don't know,
if he needs me.
Still, the closer I get the more I realize, maybe it was better when I kept everything inside. His eyes, damn those eyes of his, they could capture me in a heartbeat. Yet, the more I graze in them, the more I realize his frustration.
No, this time it's different.
Yet, I know he can't hear me.
This time it's different.
I've got more to say they nagging words.
Then, once again, I'm beat into the ground. The words can't escape my mouth, and he takes advantage of it. He is screaming now, but I can't hear him. Or maybe it wasn't that I couldn't, more that I didn't want to.
I'm useless,
I'm beat,
once again.
Then it comes, the words that re-write my conscious.
"...from a worthless person"
And now I know,
I'm useless,
I'm worthless,
I'm no more.
But what does one say when their heart is broken? I raise my head, I thought it was pretty obvious, that underneath my dark features a bright contrast of light shines. But I guess I was wrong. And so the light slips into the darkness. He stares at me now, as if waiting for some kind of reply.
The fool,
He is so...
unaware.
He has shattered my defenses,
without a clue in mind.
Now, there's nothing left to say, but to say what my heart set out to. It seemed a lot easier saying it to myself.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
"...I love you."
My inner self screams, tearing apart my insides.
I've ruined myself.
I've ruined myself.
I had a chance,
but now it's gone.
I just wanted to tell him so he'd know. But now all he knows, is that I can't even do him the favor of telling him something with emotion.
I love you.
I love you.
There was such a difference I cringed, and bit back the tears that threatened to escape. I brought myself to look at him, he wore a facial expression I'd never seen. I guess I've disappointed him to.
And so now he is aware of what he thinks lies within me.
Still,
he is so unaware,
of what I know exists within me.
The end of flashback
His fist once again came in contact with the night stand.
BAM!
The c.d player continue to skip, giving up in frustration he decided just to turn it off. Ichigo cursed mentally, he was so use to falling asleep with music. And now, he needed the music more than ever. He couldn't fall asleep, and chances were he wouldn't fall asleep. Suddenly, he remember what his father had said to him about trouble falling asleep.
'Well, when you can't sleep there's only one thing you do. Do you know what that is? You don't? Well that's gotta suck, because I don't either!'
"Useless no-good father..." Ichigo mumbled under his breath more harsh comments towards his father before sliding on his side, facing his room. The moonlight shines against the edges of the furniture, giving off a glowy look. He lied there for what seemed to be forever. Just like how he stood there facing the spot where she had spoken the words, the moment repeating itself over and over again. He was so lost in thought as he stood there, now alone, he hadn't even notice she had left.
Sleep had left him, and it wasn't coming back, until she came back. Then the harsh reality of everything hit him.
Why was he trying to sleep? Obviously things weren't going to be better in the morning.
Rukia's POV:
'AAHHH!! Don't ...hu-u-nt me...? Don't h-u-nuch me...? Don't hu-gg me...?'
I tilted the old manga book that I got from...well...I.....went to the school library, came upon the old manga books, took one off the shelf, slickly shoved in in my pocket, bolted for the door, stopped right before the door, went back a couple feet to the water fountain, got a drink, saw some library monitor chick running at me...with a broom, and ran like hell.
'AAHHH!! Don't....hu.....' I strained to see the letters written in the book, it's not easy reading in the dark with only a little light, which was from of the slightly open door.
'AAHHH!!.... don't.... HURT ME! AH HAH!' I glanced down at the picture, truthfully with both of the drawn characters looking like dark, black blobs, I couldn't tell who was telling who not to hurt them.
'You can't....te--ii me...w-ont-- to do!' Well, obviously this isn't working. Yeah I could blame the fact that I can't read it properly on the lack of light, but the truth was, even if a was sitting beside the sun I doubt I would be able to concentrate.
His silence,
it was worst than anything he could have possibly said.
"Its hard to wake up, when the shades have been pulled shut
This house is haunted, it's so pathetic, it makes no sense at all..."
I look through the crack of the door
What the hell? I raise an eyebrow and look straight through the crack.
"If
this
wants
-"
"Damn." The voice said, implied toward the music.
Wait, Ichigo's home? Already?!
He gets up, dragging himself aross the room, and flicks off the light.My eyesfollow him as he makes his way across the room and instinctively flops on the bed.
It was times like these were I wish that instead of having the ability to slice and dice hollows, I could read minds. Hey, don't laugh. I know, I know, it's not an original idea. But seriously, I would love to have that ability. I stared at him, what could he possibly be thinking, in that very petit brain of his?
"Useless no-good father..." and following by that very out-of-the-blue comment were other harsh ones directed towards his father, and the sad thing was, I couldn't really say his father wasn't any of them.
He flipped his body, so he was facing the wall, and I was left to stare at his backside, my eyes wondered down his spine and settled on his as-no, no, no, no, I didn't just say that. I rested by book down and eventually the comfort of the blankets, took over the uncomfort of my own thoughts, and I rested by head down and fell into a deep sleep.
Ichigo's POV:
I held by breath. Nope, it wasn't me. I listened again. Yep, there's no doubt now, I heard something. Almost a...snore? Um, that's weird though, Karin got out of that habit along time ago, and dads to far from my bedroom for me to hear his massive snoring. I slipped out of the warmth of my bed and made my way to the door. I pressed my head against the door, and listened. Nothing, silence, zip-po. No, there it is again! Ok, now this is just getting annoying. Not now, this is not the time to be dealing with useless shit.
I head back toward the bed, but stop, when I hear the noise again. I glance toward the closet. Kon...? I swifly made my way to the closet, and slid the door open.
Rukia?!
I try not to gasp, or even more throw my arms around her, and swing her around still I'm satisfied that she wont leave me again.
I want to ask her so much, but she looks so peaceful sleeping a decided to wait till morning comes.
Maybe, just maybe, things might be better in the morning.
She shivers, in response I pull the blanket from her mid-thighs to her shoulders. She turns and faces my direction, eyes half open.
"....you....your....."
I cast my eyes upon her, making, well, trying to make eye contact with her half open eyes.
"...your...."
She bolts upright, eyes still half opened.
"INVADING MY PRIVACY!!"
Startled, and a bit taken back, I glance at her, and speak.
" ....why...you ....."
Aggravated, I look at her once more, this time she's asleep again. Was she just talking in her sleep?
"Your...such a idiot....." she mumbles,eyes still closed,then smiles and she slides on her back, now comfortable. I glance at her one last time before creeping to my own bed, and smile too.
Maybe one day, I'll finally be able to show her this smile that she's created.
( Stupid, Sarah McLachlan. Lyrics directed towards Ichigo from Rukia. )
Night lift up the shades,
let in the brilliant light of morning.
But steady there now
for I am weak and starving for mercy.
Sleep has left me alone,
to carry the weight of unravelling where we went wrong.
It's all I can do to hang on
to keep me from falling,
into old familiar shoes...
CHORUS:
How stupid could I be...
a simpleton could see,
that you're no good for me,
but you're the only one I see...
Love has made me a fool,
it set me on fire and watched as I floundered.
Unable to speak
except to cry out and wait for your answer.
But you come around in your time,
speaking of fabulous places,
create an oasis.
Dries up as soon as you're gone
you leave me here burning,
in this desert ...without you
CHORUS:
How stupid could I be...
a simpleton could see,
that you're no good for me,
but you're the only one I see...
Everything changes...
everything falls apart,
can't stop to feel myself losing control,
but deep in my senses I know...
Chorus
------------------------------------
The end!...Or is it..?...Yeah...yeah it is...
A/N:Well, like I said, here it is chapper 2, and the last chapter. Sorry it's so short, I was thinking of making it a one-shot by combining the the two chapters, so tell me if I should or not!
Well thanks again to my reviewers!
And so, now, feel free to review...yes...that shiny...attractive button that says "submit review" ..press it....you know you wanna...
.:: Jenna ::.