"There is still a lot unresolved there," Joey offered.

"I'm not surprised," Max replied dryly, as her phone rang. "Sorry. It could be about Kay . . . Hello?"

"Hey I just wanted to make sure that you got home okay," Kenny said. "You didn't pick up, so I thought I would try your cell. Where are you?"

"In my front yard . . . Can I call you back? It's not a good time."

"Okay," he agreed slowly, not liking her tone. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," she replied, fighting of the urge to cry at the overwhelming events of the day. "I have to go. Bye."

"Who was that?" Skeeter asked.

"No one," Max said, as she tossed her phone back in her purse. "Can we do this some other time? I know you flew all of this way, but I haven't slept in a few days."

"Was it Kenny?" Skeeter asked.

Max paused, before she nodded. "Yeah."

"And you two aren't back together? I thought that was what you wanted," Joey asked. "After all of this time . . . It's a second chance."

"There is still a lot unresolved there," Max replied, repeating Joey's earlier statement. "I don't think some of it ever will be."

"How did he handle your and Jimmy's affair? He was shocked when I told him," Skeeter trailed off.

"Better then I would have thought," she replied, stifling a yawn. "Sorry."

"We'll come back tomorrow," Skeeter said, as he scribbled down the hotel information for her. "Here."

"Thanks."

18181818181818

"Kim! Wait up!" Littleton called. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I can't just stand there and make small talk! I thought I could, but no! I hate her Jon! I can't forget how she destroyed my family."

"If I remember correctly, your Mom ran off with Rachel before your father and Max had their affair. A lot of things contributed to the crash honey, and Max isn't totally blameless. She seems to carry around a lot of guilt as it is."

Kim shook her head. "Why does she get to live and he had to die? It's not fair."

"Life isn't fair. We deal."

"I can't forgive her."

18181818181818

Max woke of with a jerk, and sat up slowly in her dark bedroom. Six A.M, she thought, groaning inwardly. I finally get to sleep, and I wake up this early? What the hell is wrong with me? Sinking back against the pillows, she tried to make her body relax again, but couldn't stop her racing thoughts. What am I going to do, she wondered, I mean really? Kaylee, just concentrate on her for now, and forget about the rest of them. She is the important person here. Groaning again, she slid out from underneath the covers, and made her way downstairs. Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, she settled onto the back porch. Gazing up at the lightening sky, she closed her eyes and let the sea breeze caress her skin.

"You were making love to me, weren't you Kenny? Or was it just sex?"

"No."

"Then what are so you afraid of?"

"That you'd leave. We'd be together, and then you'd leave. I don't think I could handle that."

"Damn," she whispered, thinking back to a long and forgotten conversation. "I can't think about him this way."

"Then tell me. I don't know what else to do for you. Talk to me dammit."

"What should I tell you? That I feel like life is slipping away from me? That this is the end? That we'll never get married? Or that I'll never get to see you pregnant with our kid? Maybe that I'll never hold you, kiss you, make love to you again? Is that what you wanted to hear?"

"Kenny."

He cut her off. "You promise me something Max. Right now. If I die, I want you to do all of that. Find someone else, be happy. Don't mourn me forever, and go live your life. You promise me that."

"Hello?" she said hoarsely, picking up the ringing phone. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"You never called me back," Kenny countered. "And I knew you'd be awake. You're too wound up to sleep."

"I passed out as soon as I got inside," she trailed off. "Why are you calling?"

He paused. "I dunno. Just wanted to hear your voice I guess. If you're awake and stuff . . ."

"Kenny."

He cut her off,. "No pressure. What else is there to do at this hour?"

"I'm just watching the sun come up."

"You want some company?"

"I've had enough company lately."

"Meaning?"

She yawned, and filled him in on the rest of yesterdays events. "So yeah. I'm going to see Kay around eight."

"Maybe they just want to put it all to rest," Kenny offered. "Like you should."

"It's not that simple."

"Make it be then. Are you just going to let it haunt you forever? Do you think that making yourself miserable will make everything that happened just go away?"

"What would you have me do then? If you think that being your girlfriend again will make me happy, then you're dead wrong."

"Really? What about the part of you that wants it? Like you said yesterday?"

"It's a very small part of me. The part that still believes in happy endings. Do you know how many nights I dreamed that you came back to me? Even when I was with Jimmy, I still dreamed that. When I woke up after having Kaylee, you were who I called out for, not him. Even in Philadelphia, I still thought . . . I can't keep doing this with you. I'll see you later. Bye."

"Max! Wait!"

"What?"

"You're impossible!" Kenny sputtered. "After everything that we've been through together . . . Do you want to make the same mistake I did?"

"What was that?"

"Throwing it all away."

"I didn't give up on us until you did. Bye. I'll see you at the hospital."

18181818181818

Kenny stood in the doorway, and studied Max sitting by Kaylee's bed. She doesn't look 32 he thought, although I'm probably biased. Shit. What do I say to her now? She probably wants to smack me. Concentrate on Kaylee for now.

"Hey. Good morning. Again."

"Hi," she said softly, not turning around.

He plopped down in the chair next to her. "She's asleep?"

"She was awake awhile ago, but with all of the antibiotics and stuff . . . well you know."

"Yeah. It wears on you. Probably more when you're two. Max?"

"Yeah?"

"About this morning, I didn't mean to piss you off any more then I already have. I want you to be happy more then anything else. You matter to me. I might not have shown it recently, but you've always been the most important person in my life."

Max turned to look at him. "Do you understand why I can't be with you any more?"

"You don't trust me. That's what it boils down to right now."

She bit her lip. "You've been wonderful while Kay has been sick. I wouldn't have told you about her if I didn't believe . . . If I thought you were capable of hurting her the same way you hurt me, I never would have told you."

"Max."

"Let me finish. I won't deprive you of your daughter, Kenny. I can't do that. You and me? I can't do it again."

"I don't know anything about being a father."

She smiled at that. "I didn't know anything about being a mom when I had her. I learned. Your father is amazing, so you have a good model to go off of."

He ached to touch her at her comment. "I'm sure he'd appreciate that."

Max nodded, as she looked back over at Kaylee. "Maybe. I doubt my opinion carries much weight with them."

"Hey, if you matter to me, you matter to them. Plus, you're the mother of their only grandchild. They don't hate you sweet-, Max."

"This is hard for you too," she commented, as she straightened out the sheet covering Kaylee.

"I'd do a lot of things differently," he replied. "We can't turn back time though, and I know I can't make it up to you. I'm just glad that you're letting me in this much."

"It's a lot farther then I planned on. When I saw you standing there . . . I wanted to run."

"Yeah, I noticed."

She shook her head. "You don't understand. I was so happy to see you, and all of those old feelings came rushing back . . . before reality hit again."

"You were happy?" he asked. "You didn't look that way."

"Also in shock. It isn't every day that my ex-boyfriend comes back from the dead, but even after everything, I was so glad to see you. I had all these things I planned to say if I ever saw you again," Max trailed off. "I had this dream, or at least I think it was a dream. It was after I had Kay, and was in the coma. Maybe it wasn't a dream because I remember looking down at myself. Wondering if I was dead."

"And I told you that you weren't," he finished for her. "And that I wasn't either."

She nodded slowly. "You told me that you loved me, that you always loved me."

"And I kissed you," he added. "Then you were ripped away from me, and it took me so long to get back, Max. To find you again."

"How could we have the same dream?"

"It wasn't a dream. An out of body experience?"

"I had almost forgotten about it," she said softly. "It's why I woke up saying your name."

"I love it when you say my name."

She swallowed, as she slowly brought her hand to his face. Stroking his cheek gently. "Kenny."

"Max," he replied, brushing her hair off her face.

"I didn't want this to happen," she whispered. "To feel this way again, about you, about anyone . . . it terrifies me."

"Don't be scared," he whispered back, still stroking her hair. "We're going to be okay. Better then okay."

"Mommy!" Kaylee called. "Mommy!"

Max pulled away, as quickly as she had leaned in. "Kay? Good morning, Sweetie."

18181818181818

"So, what do you think?" Skeeter asked.

Joey shrugged. "It was interesting, to say the least. She looked . . . I think she's still suffering. Having Kenny come storming back into her life probably isn't helping, and Kaylee being sick."

"Then having all of us show up," Skeeter trailed off. "I don't think that Max has moved on any more then Kim has. It haunts both of them."

"Don't compare me to her," Kim said softly, as she and Littleton joined them. "We're nothing alike."

"Oh no? You're both so wrapped up in the past, and it's eating away at you. You told her that you wanted her daughter to die. That isn't you, Kim," Littleton interjected. "It's the bitterness and the rage that you've lived with. Just like she's lived with the guilt. You've both have to let it go."

"I don't know if I can," Kim whispered. "Of course I don't want Kaylee to die . . . I just don't want to forget him."

18181818181818

"I think she's out for the night," Kenny offered, as he watched Max stretch her arms over her head. "You okay?"

"Just a little stiff," she replied, avoiding eye contact with him. "I can't wait to bring her home . . . She's gotten better so quickly."

"Kids are resilient," he replied, shooting their sleeping daughter a look of concern. "She takes after her mother."

"And her father," Max said distantly. "We've been through a lot. All of us."

He swallowed, "I know it's late, but do you want to get some dinner? I haven't seen you eat anything all day."

She paused, as she finally looked up at him. "I really just want to crawl into bed and sleep."

He shrugged despite the disappointment because he had thought they had been making progress. "Maybe some other time then?"

She sighed, as she turned back to look at him, "Tell you what. I'm not very good company at the moment, and I planned on ordering Chinese food then going to bed. If you want to come."

"How can I resist an invitation like that?" he asked sarcastically. "I thought we were, you know what? Never mind."

"What?"

"You're driving me insane," he practically shouted, as she took a step back at his outburst. "I don't even know how to talk to you anymore! You're running hot and cold on me Max! Every time we're together . . . I don't know what to say to you to make it right again! I'm sick of you making me feel guilty all of the time. I hurt you. I know that. You don't have to keep reminding me of it."

She stepped back at his outburst. "Do I do that?"

"Yes!"

She sank back down onto the couch, and looked up at him. "I didn't mean to . . . Kenny, I . . . I know you're sorry for everything that happened between us. I even understand your reasoning for it."

"But?"

"I forgave you."

"When?"

"In Philly . . . I couldn't hate you then. I let you go, I let you die. I forgave you then."

"And I screwed it all up by coming back?"

She shook her head, and tried in vain to swallow back the tears that were spilling. "No. Having you back in my life, Kay's life . . . It's a gift. I love you, Kenny."

.