Chapter Three
a/n: i'm sorry, i know i said it was only going to be three chapters, but it just keeps growing. The story originated out of the ending, so i dont know why ts taking me so long to get there. Just bear with me. The last chapter will DEFINATELY be the last one, i've already started writing it, so it should be up a couple of hours from now, so you wont have long to wait! hehe cheers. Tess
It was December before they managed to talk properly again. The last months had been hell for both. Each had really believed that these new revelations would not really affect their day-to-day relationship, but the easy camaraderie they had shared before that fateful night was gone. Their chess games had continued, but were short and cursory. They were merely time out to deal with their own personal thoughts rather than really talking to the other. Even the staff had noticed the change in the relationship between their headmaster and his deputy. Their easy banter had been replaced by frosty silences and sad glances across the table.
Albus had tried to raise the conversation several times but each time was silenced by a pleading glance and Minerva's pain filled eyes. He hadn't slept properly for months, every night waking up in a cold sweat, and sobbing quietly at finding himself alone again. He had thought of a million reasons he could tell her why they should be together, why even a small time of happiness is better than a lifetime of sadness and regret, but he could not bring himself to tell her when he really had no cure for what she believed so strongly.
For Minerva, every day that she didn't wake up in Albus' arms was like pure torture. To know that he had offered his love and she had pushed him away was almost like tearing her heart out and jumping on it. If she was honest with herself, yes she regretted her decision, but for the first time in her life Minerva was being cowardly, overly protective of her heart. Having kept it cold for so long she was not sure that she could survive loving and losing, as would inevitably happen. Albus was eighty years her senior for god's sake! He could not live forever and she would be left behind, a widow relegated to a cold bed and mourning the love of her life for the remainder of her days. For Minerva, it was better to leave her heart cold than to love and lose.
On the morning of the 18th of December, exactly a week before Christmas, Albus was pacing his study trying to think of something he could give Minerva to show her how much he cared, and that would help to melt the ice cave she had built around her heart. He couldn't help but notice the irony in the fact that his silence for so long had been one off the principal causes of her insular emotions, and now just when he ha spoken out because he thought it would be too late for him, it was already too late for her. Dropping into his chair behind his desk he buried his face in his hands and softly began to weep, salty tears carving tracks down his cheeks and becoming lost in his beard.
A knock on the door interrupted his reverie, and he quickly dies his tears and has grateful that his beard would cover most of the signs of recent crying. Minerva was the only person who was ever allowed to see him cry, but he had a feeling that even his tears would push her further away.
To his relief it wasn't Minerva at the door, but Irma Pince – Hogwarts Librarian. It was not often that she was drawn to the headmaster's office, but he had flooed her and asked her to bring him some light reading. Nothing too heavy but just interesting enough to take his mind off recent events.
"Headmaster, I know you've read this a million times, but I've brought you the charmed automatically updating copy, so you never know what you'll find in here. I hope it's the sort of thing you're after," and placing a copy of "Hogwarts: A History" on his desk, she quietly withdrew from the room, reflecting on the sombre changes in the headmaster.
Albus was grateful for the distraction and opened the book at a random page, quickly skimming the text he had read a million times before, a small smile crept across his face, and he felt that, for the first time in a long time, providence was shining down on him. He had found a gift for Minerva.
a/n: anyone who can see the ending, please shutup about it and dont go ruining it for the others. I know its going to be a little bit cheesy, but hey, i write fluff so who can blame me. You're the one reading it! hehehe! love to all my reviewers.