Once again I don't own Harry potter, but just the main idea for this fic. I ask you, who in their right mind would have the balls to say that they were seriously the great goddess JK Rowling? I mean really!
By the way just so all those purists out there don't get in a big huff, I'm telling you now that I'm a purist, but I just didn't want to spend all that time trying to figure out what Ron's daily schedule was so I just made up my own. Besides, this is seventh year fic.
7:00 – 7:45................................................................................................... Breakfast
8:00 – 10:00...................................................................................................Charms
10:15 – 11:45.................................................................................................History
11:45 – 1:15....................................................................................................Lunch
1:30 – 3:00..................................................................................................... Transfigurations
3:15 – 4:15..................................................................................................... Potions
4:15 – 4:45..................................................................................................... Free Time
5:00 – 6:00..................................................................................................... Dinner
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I sighed and close my journal for the fifth time in about three minutes, and I still couldn't believe what I had written there. I had written things about my friends and myself that I hardly wanted to admit to; it was true… no one knows about me being bisexual. But now someone else was going to know. Be damned on him if this is a trap, it was about time that I told someone I was bisexual, so I guess this is also the day that I "come out."
I groaned and ran a hand through my hair, pulling it away I saw a few hairs sticking out between my fingers. I opened the book once more and then place the hairs carefully in the center of the last page next to the first flower my sister had given me from Hogwarts grounds. Sighing again, I just looked at the cover of my journal and thought about what was written for today. It was almost inconceivable, Draco Malfoy had tried to kiss me, I was going to tell him that I liked him… this was either going to very, very good or very bad. I had to think about this a while.
Bad side effects:
Harry hates me
The SCHOOL hates me
Gryffindor house make my life a living hell
Lucius tries to kill me
Good side effects:
DRACO MALFOY IS MY BOYFRIEND! WOOT!
I live happily ever after
Wow… can you say sap? Shaking my head I pushed the book back underneath my mattress where no one would look — well I guess Neville would, but I don't think he'd READ it — besides the house elves and they were working to hard to pay attention to a random book, moreover they would put it back where it belonged; that is, under the mattress. But I didn't care about that a the moment, I would rather bask in the thought that in this afternoon—because it was this afternoon, for it was after midnight before I even got to the pitch—I would either be the happiest I've been in a very long time or the most embarrassed person in history. Groaning again, I lie down and pulled the quilt over my body. I had once heard that sleep was good for a nervous soul; I was going to put that to the test. I was asleep in a few minutes the confrontation with my lust demon still in my thoughts and dreams.
I was awoken later by the sounds of Harry's screams… "Why in the bloody, bloody hell is my fathers cloak out!" 'Ooppps. I forgot to put it away.' I thought, but really was it necessary for him to yell so loud? I don't think the Hufflepuffs heard him. There was a shout from Dean to 'shut his bloody hole' and that he 'was worse then a Slytherin sometimes' and 'no one cares about his damn cloak anyway!' Peeking my head out of the curtains, I looked at Harry. Maybe I should tell him later? He was livid. Yes, definitely later… "It had to be someone in here! No one knows about it other then you guys!"
I cringed at the sound of his voice, I felt like I was going to be sick; my head hurt, every bone in my body felt like lead, and I just knew I was going to throw up today sooner or later. "Oh would you shut up Harry," I say as I climb out of bed, "you should be grateful you got it back at all, what with the way you're acting…" my voice was raspy in my own ears. Harry seemed to have gotten up on the wrong side of the bed that morning; he shook the cloak at me. "Do you have something to do with this Ron?" he asked, eyes squinting evilly at me behind his round glasses. Oh bugger it… "Yes, it took the damned thing. I couldn't sleep so I plotted on you while you were asleep and took it to the pitch. I was going to bury it, but someone was already there and foiled my plan." I rubbed my hands like I saw one of those mad muggle scientists do in one of my fathers 'movies'. "One day… one day my plan will be complete… Muahaha!"
My plan had worked, Harry was so confused my random thoughts that he just shook his head, put the offending item away and left the dorm altogether. That is until there was a scream of 'Oh my god! Harry Potter in his pajamas! Get the camera!' he was back up with us in an instant.
I looked at Seamus; he looked at Neville; Neville the great guy that he was, tried not to look but he glanced at Dean anyway; and Dean sniggered over at me. Harry just blushed. Suddenly all the tension was gone from the room from the early morning fight, and we through ourselves at each other trying to keep upright, short gasps of air in between laughter and slamming younger years with flashing cameras out the dorm door. Minutes later, we sat with our backs against the door smiles and adrenaline of a good laugh still in our systems when Seamus said that we had better get ready for classes; that made everyone frown. I knew why everyone else didn't want to go to classes; it was mandatory that you didn't like class that is except for Hermione. Nevertheless, once Seamus had said those words, I suddenly felt sick again. But sill I pushed my self off the door and gathered my things for a shower.
Charms went alright. I got a good mark on my essay, but it had a message on the top in Flitwick's pointy scrawl. 'You rewrite yourself too much Ronald. Try to work on that.' I had barely gotten to look at the page before Hermione had snatched it out of my grasp. "Hey!" but the words had died on my lips; for one glance of Hermione's icy cold glare could kill even a frost giant. "You rewrote your self?" she asked. "Yes… yes I did, and I'm proud I did! I don't care!" Hermione only rolled her eyes and tossed the paper back at me. As if her one-hundred proves anything at all!
My next class, History – as usual – was two hours of pure boredom. Two hours of the history of troll freak show rebellions, goblin rebellions, and wizard union strikes. But one of the worst things about that class was that I had two hours, two whole hours to think… how I was going to act. Where was I going to touch him? Was I going to touch him? What would I say? Should I try suave or uncertain? Should I change my shirt or leave it the way it is? Would I be well or ill? Oh, god… suddenly I didn't feel so good; "Mr. Binns… Mr. Binns I don't feel so good. Can I go to the bathroom?"
"Huh? Oh yes, yes, of course, of course, of course."
Neville gave me a sympathetic eye as I walked out of the room, holding my gut. As soon as I had closed the classroom door I was running down the corridor, in to the lavatory and was worshiping the porcelain god within seconds. I knelt there, thinking why in the hell had I ever come to the decision to tell Draco I liked him (hell, I thought he was the best thing since Quidditch, don't ask me why), when I heard a noise. The soft clops of shoes on tile. I was scared; please, please, I thought, please don't let anyone find me like this; Prostrate before a toilet, face covered in bits of vomit. Nevertheless, my prayers weren't answered, "Ron," It was Harry's voice, "Ron are you alright. You've been acting pretty weird since last night and I was wondering if there was something I could do to help?" I groaned and leaned farther into the bowl, my dry heave had lessened as I slowly came back into my self, "No Harry, I don't think…" I heaved again, "That there anything you could do for me." Unless you want to tell Draco that I think he has the sexiest body on earth; I thought. "Well then why are you throwing up? Do you have the flu or something?"
"No I'm not sick," I heaved again, "I think it was something I," heave, "ate." I heard him lean against the stall I was in. "What! Something you ate; with a stomach like yours? You could eat a nuclear reactor and have nothing happen to you." He started laughing, and so did I even though I had no idea what a nuclear reactor was.
Soon I figured that if I was laughing I was done puking, so I flushed the toilet for the last time and opened the stall. "You're lucky, its lunch time and we don't have another class to get to." Harry said, still leaning on the stall wall. I gave a small rueful smile and walked towards the sinks, which clicked at me. 'Tut, tut, young man; Look at that hair.', 'You need to take better care of yourself.', and, 'you're pale as a sheet!' I just wanted them to shut up. Suddenly I remembered. "Ahhh shit! My bag!" I moaned. Harry chuckled behind me. "Don't worry so much, I got it for you when I left history."
"Don't worry so much? I should be telling you that." I smiled at him and took my wand, which he had taken out for me, some how sensing what I was planning to do. "Silencio!" and the mirrors incessant tutting suddenly ceased.
It was nice, that silence that enveloped me as I washed some of my remaining nerves away (not to mention the bit of stuff). After splashing cold water on my face then sloshing some around in my mouth to get the disgusting flavor out; I was ready to go, and I said so. "It's about time. I suspect Hermione is about to come looking for us." And Harry didn't know how true that statement was, for a few seconds after he had said this, Hermione burst into the room. Harry was aghast, "Hermione you can't come in here! This is the boy's bathroom!"
"Oh shut up!" she commanded, "you've been in the girls bathroom, I can go into the guy's bathroom." Harry obviously wanted to battle, "but that was under totally different circumstances!" she glared (The frost glare was back) and told him to, "shut up!" once again. Hermione had been in a bad temper for the last few days, I really needn't have to worry about what was wrong with her. It was the full moon after all, and Hermione always has her time of the month during the full moon. I've always said that it was a form of very tame lycanthropy. She goes from mild manner Hogwarts student one day then… BAM! Bitch on wheels the next. Lavender swears up and down that one night she shredded the hangings on her bed because she got one point off a paper. I told lavender that she would do that even if she were normal, and not to worry about it. Now if she had said that she was going to shave your hair off while you slept… well, that another story. Hermione was an absolute bitch when she was on the rag, but I knew how to handle her. I smiled. She, Well... swooned. Sometimes it's nice being the Ex.
"Come on Hermione leave the guy alone… I mean someone tried to steal his cloak last night. Be a little forgiving." I could tell she wanted to blurt with 'oh god not that old thing!' but instead she bit her bottom lip and sighed, "I'm sorry Harry I guess I lost my temper again. It's just these damned hormones. But it'll be over in a few days… right good thing, huh?" she smiled at us like nothing had happened and Harry and I glanced at each other, mouths agape. We had recently had a conversation about this very situation; we had decided that we hated it when she pulled this. Being the bitch queen then playing the I'm-hormonal,-so-you-have-to-forgive-me card. "It's ok Hermione," god I hated this, "we forgive you. It's only for a few days right?" please say yes! "Yeah I suspect only two or three." I wanted to dance! Hey! Fred had recently taught me a jig. "Well, we've spent enough time in a bathroom to last me for a while." Harry said, slinging his own bag over his shoulder, "I would like to get some lunch in the near future. You can't transfigure anything on an empty stomach."
I wanted to be normal and say 'yes let's go! I get first dibs on everything!' but that day was anything but normal. I was going to tell my best friends that I was bi-sexual, and that included any one who was in the hall at the time. So the rumor mill must go on. If I'm lucky the whole school will know by breakfast tomorrow morning; and I won't have to say it only once. Oh god and Draco, if I went down to the Great hall I was going to have to face him; him or the Slytherins. We were lucky, no classes with the Slytherins so far today. Think quick Ron! Find a way out of lunch! Make that brain zoom! "Oh you guys I still don't feel so good, I'm gonna go up to the tower and take a shower. Maybe that will help."
"But you already took one today." I glared at Harry; sometimes he can be so thick. "So I'm going to take another one."
"Oh." I rolled my eyes and walked towards the door. "If you're not feeling well, shouldn't you go to see Madam Pomfrey?" I sighed. "No Hermione, I think its just one of those twenty-four hour things, I'll see you in Trasfig." And I left.
I walked with my head down the entire way to the tower, hearing the sounds from the great hall as I went. My breakfast gone I was really hungry but every time I had a thought run through my head it somehow lead back to later today. I groaned (I seemed to groan a lot today). I ran a hand through my hair like I did last night, but this time came out with no hairs. I was so confused, what was I going to do. How was I going to tell Draco that I liked him, like (gulp) he liked me? My feet were shuffling as I mumbled the password to the FatLady, and drug myself inside the common room.
"You look like hell Ron," Was the first thing that I had heard. My head snapped up and who did I see but the ever faithful Neville Longbottom. Sitting in a wing backed chair; Ankle resting on his knee, hands gripped on the rests. He looked more like some mad criminal that was about to burst out into the cliché muahaha, than the loyal friend that he was. "Oh god, I feel like hell." I said, slouching down into a near by sofa. He just blinked at me and I realized that I was supposed to tell him what was going on. I told him about Charms to History then to the loo, my 'nervousness' (he only smiled at me and said, "Well at least you got to the loo this time." I wanted to smack him), and Harry and Hermione's and my conversation. I looked around the common room to check that no one was there. "What am I supposed to tell them Neville?" I hissed, "'hey Harry, Hermione, guess what? I'm Bi!' some how I don't think that would tide over well." 'Hehehe' I snapped my head over towards the stairwell that leads to the dorms. I could have sworn that I heard someone giggling; must have been my imagination. Neville brought me back to reality.
"Well," he was saying, "when I'm nervous about something, I just go straight for it. You know, don't beat around the bush and such." I nodded. "Yeah I think I'm gonna have to do that. Just get it out of the way, so I don't have to deal with it again."
"That would be the best thing."
"But that still doesn't tell me what to do about Draco…" I was getting depressed. 'Gasp!' now I know I heard something. "I'm sorry Ron, but that's something that you have to deal with on your own. I could think on that a thousand years and still not have all the right answers. Sometimes you just have to wing It." yawning, I agreed. For some stupid reason I was suddenly very tired, but I still had to change. I didn't want to approach that beautiful lust demon with this filthy shirt on. I hoped I had something presentable in my trunk. Standing, I thanked Neville for his advice and the advice last night, and said "I'm going to make myself presentable now." He nodded and said that he had to ask professor Spout about a plant he had found growing in a random corner of Greenhouse Three that he didn't believe belonged there, and hurried out the portrait hole. Having a little over a half an hour before transfigurations, I figured he should have enough time to ask a quick question and hurry back. I my self had taken the stairs to the dorm two at a time, until I was letting the warm shower spray cover my body and soak my hair. But something still was bothering me. Was I hallucinating or had I really heard some one giggle?
The shower was nice but putting on those clean clothes was even better. They weren't anything special; just a crisp white shirt with the Gryffindor crest, and a pair of black pants, the usual Hogwarts uniform. I cast a drying charm on my hair and hurried out of the tower. The signal for lunch to end sounded just as I walked out the portrait hole. I still had about fifteen minutes to walk to Transfigurations, a whole lot of time to do nothing. And then I heard it – "Fag." I stopped and glanced over my shoulder; there in the middle of the corridor, was a group of three or four Ravenclaws. I raised an eyebrow, "say what?"
"Your Ronald Weasley right?"
"Yeah."
"We heard from Padma Patil that you take it up the ass."
"HUH?!"
I could feel a blush coming on as I covered my face, oh god it was not supposed to happen this way, I was supposed to be the one to tell. I was just supposed to tell Harry and Hermione…well… and Draco. But how, how in the hell had these fourth years that I had never seen before figure my secret out? "Well," the leader said, "is it true?" I just ignored them, and pushed them out of my way, I didn't even have time to register that they said they heard this stunning news from the sister of a fellow Gryffindor. Bracing myself on the wall, stumbled out into the main corridor. It seemed like hundreds of People were whispering, then all at once, they stopped and I was cocooned in living breathing flesh. They were all asking me questions, "Was it true? Was I a fag?', 'who had I shagged?', 'gotten into potters pants yet?', 'how much do I go for?'. It was all a jumble of faces, bodies, and voices. Oh god I was going to hyperventilate again, I could feel it coming on.
Dear readers, I am going to tell you another one of my fears. You already know about my deathly fear of spiders. Well hears another one. I hate big crowds. You know the kinds that always have people jam packed together. Dear readers; I'm Closterphobic. That's why I hate the dungeons so much. Not a single window in the whole bloody place.
Suddenly I was startled out of my mind when a hand was on me. A strong hand, one that had its owner bite its nails to the quick, and had calluses from Quidditch. I don't know how I realized what the hand looked like or how it felt because it had a hold of me for the equivalent of about five or six seconds, as it pulled me out of the crowd and into a broom closet. I could still hear the crowd out side wondering where the hell I had gone to. I sighed in relief. I was grateful for the rescue but I still was taking no chances on getting jumped, that is until I heard the sound of a woman whimpering. You know that kind of sound between a sob and out right crying? There were two whispers of lumos, and I could suddenly see in the pitch black.
I covered my face again, and issued my own whimper cry. It was Harry, Hermione, and most amazingly, Lavender. The last people I wanted to talk to right now. Lavender was the first to speak. "OH GOD RON! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean for it to happen this way! I only told Parvati, I swear! I didn't know she was going to tell her sister. Oh god! She should've known! Padmas the biggest gossip in Ravenclaw! Oh god, Oh god, Oh god, Oh god!" she then burst into out right tears; I could feel the tears pricking at my own eyes. Harry and Hermione were still silent as I asked my own questions. "But… But no one was in the common room…" Lavender hiccupped and scrubbed at her nose with a napkin that she probably stole from the great hall. "I was in the stairwell!" and she ruptured into tears again. "Stairs… you were the one who was giggling!" she nodded. I wanted to kill her, she knew well enough that everything that Parvati knows Padma was going to know soon enough; I mean they're twins and living with a pair of twins myself I can testify to that. But I thought that she felt bad enough already.
Harry then spoke for the first time, "It's all around Hogwarts. Everyone's talking about you. How you shag any one that will have you." he grumbled "That you'll do it for money." Hermione joined in "…they say that you don't care if its cock or crotch or ass… just that you get some." By now I was crying, not like Lavender mind you, just soft trickles of salt water coming down my face. Then the question that had been floating in the air since I was pulled into the closet was said. "Is it true Ron? Are you gay?" I shook my head. "No." Hermione nodded her head and smiled, "well thank god…" she turned to Lavender, "how could…" I interrupted her. "I'm bi-sexual…" I said softly, my head still down. The silence around us was deafening. That is, until the bell sounded to begin class. "We're late." I didn't care, and I said so. "I don't care; if McGonagall has heard about this, she'll under stand."
"You're right."
That was Hermione, "That's why were here, she told us to find you. We've got leave for this period." I didn't know what to say, I just sat there, staring at the floor. What was I going to do? Malfoy knows now, he has to know. Unless he's been living under a rock. But he obviously hasn't been living under a rock because he noticed me staring. Just like Neville noticed me… oh boy who else saw? My knees bent and I was crouching and clutching at my scalp, it felt like I was ripping the hair out. My eyes were wide and wild, my mind utter chaos. "I'm gonna die…" they were simple words but described my feelings exactly. "Oh god, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die…" the same words kept coming from my mouth like a holy mantra, and my body of it's own accord was rocking back and forth on the balls of my feet.
–Smack!– I was suddenly flat on my arse holding my cheek. I wanted to ask what in the bloody hell that was for, but I wasn't stupid. "You stupid git!" Ok, maybe I was. "Pull yourself together! So the school knows your gay…" (Bi-sexual, I mumbled) "Who cares? Love who you love and be who you are. I'm tired of being in this closet, and you're out of it anyway. So lets go." I suddenly remembered why I loved Hermione; she made so much since sometimes. Besides she had reminded me of something I had said last night; 'be damned what the world and everyone else thinks! It's not there place to tell me who I should and should not like or love…' Yeah, she's right, I'm right, and be damned what they think.
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Ok that's it! No more chapter predictions. Every time I say one or two more chapters it ends up being three! So this fic is done when it done!
Oh and thanks for all the reviews, they've all been so nice! I love nice reviews! Espically ones that say what I'm doing good or bad (hint hint). any spelling or gramer mistakes would be nice too.