"Are you okay?" Byakko asked one evening as they lay together after some snuggling.
Touda sighed. Of course he was okay. He had never been better ever since his imprisonment. He had thought Tsuzuki was his salvation, his only chance to redeem himself in his own eyes – he couldn't care less about the others. But then Byakko had entered the picture so suddenly, without a warning. He had known the white tiger for decades, but he had never considered him as a lover. That had changed. Dramatically.
"I'm fine," he murmured.
Byakko pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at him, red eyes serious. "You're not."
Touda sighed again. "Byakko…"
"Talk to me… please? Is it something around here? This place? Are you mistreated by the servants? Did Sohryu say something?"
He stilled the waterfall of words and smiled slightly. "Nothing of the above. I'm just… not used to this."
"What? The palace? The bed? Me?"
"All of it," Touda confessed softly. "My life, so far, has been… difficult."
"I know," Byakko murmured, sitting up. "I know. And I wish I could do something… anything…"
"You did enough already, Byakko, more than anyone."
A mild frown appeared on the smooth features, but Touda stopped whatever the tiger wanted to say.
"I committed a crime, Byakko. My pardon was only given because of Tsuzuki. Your relationship with me is seen as… an offense of sorts. No one will say anything, but they will talk."
"I don't care. Sohryu can have it out if he wants to, but this was my decision. You are my decision. I stand by it."
A curl of warmth spread through the fire shikigami. There was no denying the similarity between Tsuzuki and Byakko sometimes. Like now. Both would face incredible odds to follow their conviction.
He reached out to run a tender caress along the smooth skin of an arm. "You don't know me, Byakko. You don't know me at all."
"I know enough."
"You were a child in those days. Byakko…"
Red eyes showed annoyance. "I'm not a child anymore, even if you are all older than me!" he growled. "Don't treat me as one!"
He pulled the slender form close, pressing a kiss on the handsome face. "I'm not. I never would. You're not a child. I'm just saying that to understand why the others treat me as they do, you should learn about the past."
"Does Tsuzuki know?"
He nodded. "Most of it."
"Okay." The tiger snuggled close again.
Nothing more was said, but Touda felt something inside of him clench for no reason.
####################
Byakko, for all his easy manner, his cheerfulness and his smiles, was a very serious person when it came to his job. He was the Protector of the West, one of the four Gods of GensouKai, and with it responsible for the safety and the well-being of all its inhabitants, especially the West. Yes, he could be playful, but he never forgot just who and what he was, what he represented.
The same was true about his relationship with Touda. No one could accuse him of going into it with his eyes shut. He wasn't blind to who and what Touda was, what he had done, about his crime. He wasn't blind and he wasn't seeing everything in a pink haze. Sure, he was in love. He had never felt so intensely in all his young life, but hormones didn't guide his actions – well, they did in bed and Byakko was insatiable when it came to the other shikigami.
Others might call him foolish for seeking a physical relationship with Touda, but he knew there was more to the black shikigami than the rest of the world wanted to believe. There was a lot more and he had seen it in those golden eyes throughout the days Touda had stayed with him after the almost fatal injury. And he had seen it in the way the serpent lived. Touda was proud, Touda was a loner, but Touda also secretly sought companionship. Byakko felt it whenever they lay together, in the caresses, the kisses, the simple pleasure of being close.
He loved Touda, he wanted him, he wanted to be close. He wanted to know
about him, about everything that made him what he was, good and bad.
So it was only natural for him to look into what Touda didn't like
to talk about: the past. His lover had suffered for it, had been imprisoned,
and Byakko saw no reason to needle him until he maybe clamped up completely.
There were records of the wars and all the other times; all he had to do
was read them.
#####
Byakko closed the big tome slowly. What he had read about the last war in the history book, the drawing he had seen – yes, Touda had apparently caused havoc and destruction of what the war had left of GensouKai. From what he could understand the war had been over, a peace contract was about to be signed – and then General Touda had lost it, falling into a berserk mode and burning the entire camp of the enemy, destroying everything and everyone who had been unfortunate enough to stand in his way, not able to tell friend from foe.
It had ended the war effectively, and it had needed all four gods and the emperor to stop him. Touda had been put under arrest and then sentenced to be imprisoned for his horrible crimes for the rest of his natural life deep within Tenkuu where nobody but his sole guard were to come near him, and even that man only had to feed and clean him, but not speak to him.
He had turned from an honorable divine general into a mass murderer.
Why?
Byakko had found no answers to this particular question, not a single hint. For everybody it seemed to be clear that Touda had simply lost his mind, had turned against his fellow shikigami in a moment of blind rage and blood lust.
In a split second?
Somehow Byakko had difficulties to believe that.
Well, there were ways to get his answers.
########################
The white tiger slowly stepped into the inner sanctuary of the palace after having the guards announce his wish to speak to the dragon. Normally he wouldn't need an appointment, but the reason he was here felt too official. He felt a little anxiety curl in his stomach – Sohryu was a deeply occupied man, and somewhat scary. Not that he was afraid of the other God, but Sohryu had an air of authority around him that had been cultivated by centuries of leadership and experience. Byakko was a child compared to the other Gods, but no one aside from Sohryu made him feel like one. Suzaku wasn't as old as Genbu or Sohryu, but she had fought in the last two wars. She was like a sister to him. Genbu was the wise old one, kind but fierce. Byakko wasn't afraid of any of them, but he had a deeply ingrained respect for Sohryu.
The dragon was his prime choice to question about the last of the four wars. He had been there more than five hundreds year ago, had been the head of one of the war parties. If anyone knew what had happened back then it was him.
Byakko heard the door being closed behind him softly. Sharp blue eyes regarded him, then Sohryu made an inviting gesture to sit.
"Byakko. What is the matter?"
No beating around the bush. Typical Sohryu.
Byakko sat down cross legged, nodding his thanks. There was no need for protocol in here, and Sohryu most definitely knew that whatever Byakko wanted to talk to him about was a private matter.
"I want to know about the last war."
"Ah, history lessons." Sohryu nodded. "You weren't but a child back then, weren't you?"
"I was ten. I barely remember."
"Fine then. What do you want to know?"
"Touda."
There was a subtle change in Sohryu's body language, his eyes hardening. "He killed. That's all."
"It was a war. You all killed probably. But…"
"Yes, we did," Sohryu cut in, "but he killed after the war was over. He killed more than fifty thousand, Byakko, and he was nearly unstoppable in his rage. He murdered."
"That would imply intention, Sohryu," Byakko argued. "From what I've read and what you just said he went into a rage. There had to be a reason. Why?"
"I don't know. We never asked. It wasn't important to us at that time."
Byakko felt his jaw almost hitting the floor.
"You mean you sentenced him, sent him into a small cell, and he wasn't even able to explain himself? Every criminal deserves a fair trial…"
"He wasn't fair either!" Sohryu exploded. "Did he ask about all the people he killed, all the innocents? No, he didn't. And if we hadn't put a spell on him we wouldn't have this discussion now!"
"You didn't even ask," he spat, "not once. What kind of a leader are you?"
Sohryu's face darkened dangerously. "I should ask you the same, Protector of the West! You are sleeping with him!"
"So what?"
"Stop it before it kills you, Byakko! Touda isn't one to make a difference between friend or foe. He will kill you one day!"
Byakko stared at Sohryu in disbelief.
"What gives you the right to interfere in my private life?" he finally demanded.
"Touda is dangerous, Byakko. You should know that as well as any other shikigami in GensouKai."
He bristled. "I repeat: what gives you the right to interfere in my
private life?! It's up to me who I call a friend or who, for that matter,
I sleep with!"
Sohryu scowled. "You are literally playing with fire, Byakko. You have
no idea who this man is."
"Neither do you, apparently!" Byakko furiously got up, stalking toward the door. "At least I made an effort to get to know him! You are so high and mighty… you can't look past your own perceptions of what might be the truth!"
He had already reached the door when Sohryu's soft voice called him to look back.
"He killed a God, too. He killed your father, Byakko."
It was like being doused with ice water. The words echoed in his mind, mocking him.
No…
Byakko fled.