Chapter Two
Olaf and Grit both stood up. They were both unharmed.
Wait a minute.
What?
Why didn't they die?
Because then the story would end, stupid. Anyway, Olaf and Grit then went towards the basement.
"I think we're lost," Olaf said after five long hours.
"Me too," Grit said. "Let's go make fun of Arthas."
"Wait a minute!" Olaf said.
"What?"
"Hi."
"...hi."
Olaf suddenly fell through a trap door into blackness. Grit blinked.
"...um."
He turned and ran, only to slip and fall and slide on the ice. He rammed into a cabinet and was knocked backwards into the hole. He landed on Olaf in the sea of blackness.
"Where are we?" Olaf asked.
Suddenly everything went red. Then green! Then white! Then yellow!!!
"Whoa!" Grit cried out.
"COLORS!" Olaf yelled. "I SEE A LOT OF COLORS! IT'S LIKE THERES A RAINBOW, IN MY BRAIN! SO MANY DELICIOUS COLORS! I LIKE THEM LIKE MAH BABIES!"
Grit blinked.
"...sir?"
"What?"
Grit blinked again. "Nothing."
"Why do you keep blinking?" Olaf asked.
"My eye contacts hurt," Grit explained.
"You wear contacts?" Olaf asked.
Grit's eye falls out.
"Thanks a lot, fatso, now everyone knows!"
Suddenly they were transported back to the throne room. With Arthas and his butt frozen to the throne and Andy with his face stuck on the frozen tree.
"Why are we here again?" Grit asked.
"Plot Device," Arthas muttered. "NOW HELP ME!"
"Why?" Olaf asked.
"Because I'm stuck," Arthas said.
"Why?" Olaf asked.
"Because the throne is frozen!"
"Why?"
"Because the weather is bad!"
"Why?"
"Because you used your damn powers!"
"Why?"
"Because you're a fat moron!"
"Why?"
Arthas' head exploded for a very strange reason in which you were not meant to know.
What's the reason?
If I told you, it wouldn't be a reason.
Come on... you can tell me.
No.
"Well, he's dead," Grit said.
"Why?" Olaf asked.
"...because shut up."
Then they heard Colin's cry for help. It went like this: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLL - P.
"That sounded like Colin!" Grit exclaimed.
"Why?"
Grit kicked Olaf in the family jewels.
"Hey! Those cost a fortune for my family to die! Take this!"
He stabbed Grit's banana.
"Hey! I was gonna eat that!" Grit yelled, ripping up Olaf's peanuts.
"Nooo! Now what will I eat at the baseball game?!"
They began ripping, destroying, stabbing, shooting, and eating each other's various fruits and nuts whose names made the whole incident seem very wrong.
Then Colin cried again.
"That sounded like Colin!" Grit stopped to say. Olaf punched him in the face, and his hat fell off, revealing a HORRIBLE, UGLY but cute little purple monkey.
"wtf?" he said.
Hold on a minute
NOW what?
Nobody just says w, t, and f.
Yes they do.
No, only on the internet.
...shut up. "wtf?" Olaf said, at the sight of the purple monkey.
"I call him Peter," Grit said. "He is my monkey. My little monkey."
"Um..." Olaf said.
The purple monkey proceeded to hump Grit's leg. Olaf recoiled in disgust.
"That's disgusting!!!" he yelled.
Grit looked down at the monkey and screamed. He screamed like a little girl.
He screamed so loud, that the ice began to break. The whole Blue Moon HQ began to break.
"Great job, girlypants."
The HQ colapsed into little ice pieces. Except for the room that Colin was in, and the stuff inside the room. In fact, we're not sure if it's on ground level or not, so it's just floating in the air.
Colin blinked. "wtf?"
Stop that.
No. After saying wtf, Colin looked around. "My bum still hurts!" he whined. He whined like a monkey, like the purple monkey that had humped Grit's leg in the most disturbing way. "That monkey should be banned," Colin said.
Hang on, how does he know what you're saying?
Because he does. Stop asking questions. Anyway, Colin somehow unfroze his butt from the chair by farting.
"Tee hee hee!" he giggled. Then he stood up.
"I have to find Olaf and Grit and Arthas and Andy and that disturbed little purple monkey!"
He slipped on the ice as he walked by and fell from the floating platform. He fell all the way through the air onto the snow. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" he screamed as he fell to the ground and was killed instantly, even though it was snow.
Actually, he didn't die. He just fell onto the snow.
"Get off," said the snow.
No, it didn't. I'm sorry for lying to you those two times. I promise I won't in chapter three. Colin got up and started looking for his friends.