Title: Broken

Description: She finally has someone to live for, but she'd never let him know that. She lives a broken life. Can the pieces ever be put back together?

Pairings: GS CW not really about them though...

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI or hardly anything really. If I did, I probably wouldn't be living out here in the Pine Barrens, worrying about writing essays and typing up labs and missing the bus every morning at 6:30.

Thoughts

She hadn't wanted to leave, but just about everyone back at the lab made her and so now she lay in her bed, staring up at the ceiling, staring into her thoughts. She shivered, despite the fact that it was eighty degrees out and her windows were open to let in the fresh night air.

Her headphones were on, she listening to the gentle music of "Lthlorien." She'd been doing this for a while; listening to her headphones before she slept. She would sort out her the thoughts and emotions that when she wasn't by herself, she tried to hide. Grissom had let her in on that secret. He told her it would help keep her mind off of work and the cases that they work on. So far, it was working.

Now, she thought about her past; something else she had been trying to hide since she had moved here from San Francisco. She had stopped getting letters from her mother and her father stopped calling to check up on here a year and a half ago. Perhaps it was better that way. Wasn't she allowed any privacy, or did she have to be watched constantly like some little kid? She just needed a break from that and while taking a break from one part of her life, she seemed to be over working another.

Recently, the whole team kept telling her that she looked so tired and that she needed rest. She'd even heard Greg and Nick talking about her. Since when did they care about how she was doing? It didn't make sense. She never really went out of her way to talk to anyone, not really anyway. When she was young and in high school she had always sat by herself and kept her focus on her work. She didn't have any friends; she kept herself from making them, especially after what happened.

Her only friend had died on her. It all flooded back to her now. There they were, walking down the street to the library and there was a man who smiled at them as they passed the trolley stop. He seemed like some friendly guy that you might pass on the street and even wave to even though you didn't know him, but this guy was different. This guy pulled out a gun and shot her friend and then ran. Sara bent down and pulled the body of her friend onto her lap. She rocked back and forth, holding her dying friend in her arms until finally her friend's eyes closed and her chest no longer moved up and down with her each and every breath. Her life was gone. It was then that Sara realized that people were always going to hurt her, no matter if it was the kids at school who laughed at her, or her best friend who died in her arms. She had decided that it wasn't worth getting too close to people. She would just live her life and die; hopefully it wouldn't be that bad.

But, her experiences also made her mad at the world, not just depressed by it. That was why she chose to be a crime scene analyst; to help the world and maybe that would give her something to be happy about. After a while, she learned that no matter where she went, the world was cruel, but she also met people that could make it feel better. That's where she is today; Las Vegas, Nevada, and those people are the rest of the crime lab team. Sometimes they were a pain, sometimes she hated them, but most of the time, she didn't know what she'd do without them.

Finally, her eyelids grew heavy and they fluttered closed. Her headphones shut off at the end of the CD and she drifted of to sleep.

The Movies

Finally, she got up and showered, then dressed for another night at the lab. It had been slow all week, which surprised her, but she didn't expect it to be any different tonight. She grabbed her headphones from the night table and headed down stairs to her Denali. It didn't take long to get to the lab and then she put her stuff away in the locker room.

"Hey Cath, ready for another slow night?" she asked.

"You're kidding, right?" Catherine said, "Greggo's a torture. If someone can put up with him for a week, they can survive anything."

Sara chuckled, "True. But, at least he gives us something to do. Instead of sitting in the break room all night, Nick and Warrick play his sick video games and we, okay well he makes the guys have a good time and we get stuck helping Grissom file paperwork. You're right, he is torture."

"I say if it's the same tonight, we get payback. Send him to Grissom's office and make him sit through bug lectures and history lessons." Catherine laughed; maybe it wouldn't be such a bad night after all.

Sara shivered. Even in the heat of the desert, it could be chilly and tonight proved that. She got up and locked the window that on any other night would have been open and the fan turned on high. For a change, she had a maroon sweatshirt on and jeans.

Everything was finished; it had been for days now. Now, she sat there, staring at the blank computer screen or trying to write or something and then she ended up trying to score points by tossing the scrunched up paper into the waste basket. She definitely wasn't meant for sports though. Half of the time, her shots ended up in the hallway, until finally one hit someone who was walking by.

It was only Greg; "Only Greg?" she thought. "Yeah right."

"The trash can is over there," he said and picked up the crumpled piece of paper and tossed it in easily.

"So I wasn't meant for sports. Anyway, what's the rest of the team up to?"

"Break room. Grissom is there, too."

"That's a first. What are you all up to?"

"Eh... crossword puzzles and hangman, what, did you actually think we'd be doing something fun?" He shook his head, "Not you bunch of boring CSIs. At least you've got me here, I'll liven things up soon; as soon as the silence drives me crazy enough to think up some brilliant idea."

A small laugh escaped her, "I might come down there and get a cup of coffee in a while. It's a bit cold in here."

"It's like ninety degrees in here," he said, "You must be getting sick or something. It's probably Noworkhalitus."

"Very funny." She got up, grabbed her CD player and passed him and started towards the break room.

It wasn't much warmer there, either, but it'd do. At least, it would do until she got tired of being around everyone and once again retreated to the other office to sit there by herself.

"Hi Sara, I didn't even see you come in today," Nick saw her come in.

"Hey and yeah, I've been here." She walked over and poured herself a cup of coffee. It was steaming hot and as she drank, she felt a lot better.

Greg walked into the break room and he had a piece of paper with him.

"Here, look, it's from this joke website," he handed the paper to Nick, who read it aloud.

It was a list of weird things to name your kids,

"The other dwarves: Angry, Sleazy, Druggy, Stupid, Sad, and Depressed. Some other odd names are Thurmon Murmon, Abbey Normal....." Even Grissom gave a chuckle as Nick read on.

Perhaps tonight wouldn't be that bad after all, but after a while, the laughter died down and soon enough the silence had returned. Sara looked around; Grissom was working on a crossword puzzle, Greg and Nick were looking at more jokes, Catherine was reading a book, and Warrick was sleeping. Sara had taken to reading the newspaper and listening to her headphones. It wasn't until Greg looked over with a look of excitement on his face that Sara stopped the CD and asked him what was wrong with him.

"Why don't we do something, watch a movie or play a game," he said.

"Hm... movie? Where would we watch a movie here, and games? We're adults, we don't play games," she stated simply and stuck her head back in the newspaper.

"And I guess you all would rather sit around reading or playing crossword puzzles?" he struck back.

Grissom looked up from the paper, "Actually I'm all out of crossword puzzles, so I guess I'm open for suggestions."

Sara frowned, when did Grissom ever side with Greg on anything non case related? She thought he would rather file paperwork or even sleep than even think about anything Greggo had to say, but it turned out that she was wrong.

"Look, I'll bring in my lap top and I have a couple DVD's with me," started.

"What DVD's exactly?" Grissom asked, "Nothing inappropriate, I hope."

"Not at all, my dear Grissom," Greg said cheerily, "I've got Spiderman, the League of Extraordinary Gentleman, The Return of the King, and Matchstick Men."

"Shall we vote?" Grissom said, "Alright, everyone write what movie you'd want to see on a slip of paper and fold it up." He himself had written down Spiderman, being the bug guy that he is.

Moments later, Grissom tallied the votes; 3 for Spiderman, 0 for the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, 2 for the Return of the King, 0 for Matchstick Men and 1 that had written on it, "Whatever Sara says." Grissom didn't have to think twice about who had written that one.

"Alright, there's a tie between Spiderman and the Return of the King," Grissom told everyone. "We'll just vote on those two now. Those for Spiderman, raise your hand."

Warrick, Catherine, and Grissom had raised their hands, "Alright, the Return of the King is what we will be watching." He was disappointed, but he had never seen the Return of the King, so it was alright; something new.

Sara smiled happily at the fact that the movie she wanted to watch would be the one they would watch. It was something to be happy about for once this week. As Greg brought in the lap top, Grissom and Greg moved to the other side of the room so they would be able to see the screen. What please Sara even more was that Grissom took the seat next to her, but then again, Greg was on the other side too, so in spite of the wonderful moment, she frowned and took to watching the movie.

An hour and a half droned on by and half of the team was getting bored. Sara, who had gotten hooked on the Lord of the Rings after her friend told her about the Fellowship of the Ring and insisted that she go to the theatre and see it, was already starting to feel her eyelids getting heavy. Slowly, her head fell onto Grissom's shoulder, not that she had meant it.

Grissom was surprised and was about to wake her up, but noticed how peaceful she looked and just left her. Greg however was a bit jealous.

Finally, when the movie ended, Grissom tried to wake Sara up, as it would look a bit conspicuous if someone turned the light on and saw the two of them like that, but she wouldn't awaken. He noticed that she was ice cold and pale and even through his shaking, she would not wake up.

Something was wrong.

He listened to her closely, making sure she was breathing okay, but he could hardly here her at all. Her heartbeat was slow and her body was limp. She needed help.