April 15th

I can hardly write, my hands are shaking so violently. But I will tell you the rest of the events on the night, a well as I can remember them. I will start from when Erik left me by the boat deck.

The crowd outside was, by now, more in number. I tried to weave myself in between the people, but had a bit of difficulty.

"Hannah!" I heard a young voice call out my name. It was Gracie; Daniel was standing next to her.

"Hannah!" he said in a breath of relief. He walked up and hugged me tightly. I smiled into his shoulder.

"I thought you weren't coming back!" He choked out, at last releasing me. I tried to smile weakly, but only a soft coughing sound came out of my mouth.

Somewhere from deep behind me a heard a loud whizzing; I wheeled around as a "popping!" sound erupted slightly in the sky.

"Distress rockets, wow." Gracie said lightly, her hand barely covering her mouth as the last bits of fire hit the ocean, and hissed away.

Distress rockets? I knew we were going to sink, but this made it seem real.

"Gracie, Hannah," Daniel said, suddenly stern again, "you have to get in a boat, do you understand? Don't wait. Go one."

Gracie looked hesitantly out to see, a look of fear in her eyes. She nodded and started walking towards a loading boat.

The sea looked black, and menacing. It must be cold, freezing? A lot of the boats had gone, and I knew there were only enough for half aboard. But, no. I wouldn't go.

"I'm not going." I told Daniel calmly.

He sighed. "Please Hannah." He places his hands with mine.

"No." I shook my head, tears welling in my eyes.

"Hannah, don't make me beg, please!" I could hear pleading in his voice.

"Daniel, I don't want to leave you!"

His fingers interlocked with mine.

"I know Hannah, but I would never be able to live with myself, knowing that you didn't get into a boat; knowing that you never made it to safety."

"What would it matter? You probably wouldn't be alive to worry! Daniel, there aren't enough boats, please!" A tear escaped my eye, and slowly it flowed down my face. It stung my lips when I tried to smile.

Daniel had fallen silent. He was going over his options in his head. He probably wasn't going to make it, and he knew it. But, if he wasn't, than neither was I.

"I'll get the next one," he whispered hoarsely.

"Then I will get the next one with you."

He bit his lip, shaking his head. We both knew there was no 'next one'

"I'll make it safely, please, Hannah, get on a boat. It would pain me greatly if you didn't."

I looked around. Officers were uncovering and hooking up boats. People where crying. Families were being torn apart. Brothers saying good-bye to sisters, sons saying good-bye to mothers, wives and husbands parting, while other decided to stick to their 'till death do us part' vow.

I decided I wasn't going to stay, and make happy Erik and Daniel. I nodded, looking in Daniel's bright green eyes. He sighed with relief.

"Thank you!" He whispered, pushing me slightly forward. He gulped, "H-here, this one's l-loading.

"Yeah," I nodded, suddenly feeling frozen. Daniel leaned into me, gently placing his lips on mine. I felt a block of ice in my throat melt, and tears started again in my eyes, falling slightly. It seemed like forever, but was only seconds, until Daniel pulled away.

"I love you, Hannah." He whispered. A crewman pulled us apart to help me aboard, but I still held onto Daniel's hand, until I couldn't reach any longer.

One I was on the lifeboat I felt cold and hopeless. People were waving back up at the deck, to their loved ones. Daniel looked down, trying to smile. I tried to smile, too, and with all the strength I could, muttered "I love you too, Daniel." And then I broke down.