A/N Here it is, everyone, the dark journey into Lucius' mind. Do you know how hard it was to find a song for this chapter? For some reason, I just couldn't find the perfect one, so sorry if it doesn't fit in exactly right. There won't be many lyrics because the song is short, it's "Without Light, I am" By Danzing :) It didn't really flow as much as I wanted, maybe I'm just not evil enough for what I wanted to portray? I think it's my shortest chapter. Ah, in any case, hope you all enjoy and, as a warning, this is a cruel, cruel man...P.S.. We learn why Malfoy's don't stutter....
Ms. Padfoot: Thank you for reviewing! :) I'm glad you didn't mind the marshmellowness of the last chapter :) He does indeed have his attention, so how will Sev cope? ::evil laugh:: it should be interesting. I'm just as surprised at the quick updates, I don't know what's with me, but they keep coming. Because You're Mine (which everyone has read, right?) will be updated soon ::hopeful look:: right?
Cinnamon: Ahh, as my email states, your review was amazingly kind! Thank you soooo much! I'm very happy no one has seemed to mind how sappy I got last chapter, you're all so nice. I feel that way about night too, so I just put my thoughts into Draco (with the exception of the abuse and flying, of course lol). Ah, so I'm not the only night lover? Isn't it wonderful, the air, the freedom...rambling there, lol. Hehe, Snape's little voice will get more annoying too, it's fun to annoy Sev. Yup, taking points relaxes him, brewing harmful potions, terrifying first years on the first day of classes and, can't forget, jumping out of dark corners on our unsuspecting trio :) I don't know whether to say thank you or apologize about your assignment, so I'll do both: Thank you! and I'm sorry :) I myself have been getting very lax with my h/w because I spend my time reading fics (including yours, so it's your fault too!). Isn't Lifehouse great? More of their songs will probably be used, I love all the lyrics. I'm glad the switching didn't mess you up, I didn't want to change it so much, but thought it was necessary to get the points across :) Your chapter (and the whole story) is wonderful! I love the Hannah aspect, she's just what Draco needs. I'm honored you want your friend to read my story, thank you :) Not a HP fan? That must be changed :) I know what you mean about not wanting to tell her which it is. None of my friends write, most don't know I do, and none are nearly as into HP as I am. I refer sometimes to this story to a friend who is a Draco fan (she read the 1st book and likes the movies) but she's never read it or anything. This is my secret life :) Knees do tend to hurt after constant begging, don't they? ::sigh:: Things like that you find out the hard way, like when authors don't update quickly, lol. Never stop ramblings! They're fun fun fun for everyone! "wonderful, charismatic, exceptional story"? You're going to give me a big head :p I will agree with you only if you agree yours is also all of the above and more :p I know, I want to hug Draco too, much as I liked writing the last chapter, it was also really sad to do. I've also had friends that have attempted to go that way, so I know what you mean. I hope you liked my ideas for your chapter :) And thank you once again for such a nice review and just wait for mine to your next chapter ::evil laugh::. Hehe, my fave part of your review is that you sound as insane as me :)
Lady LaCroix: Thank you for reviewing! Don't worry, Snape will be coming in abundance now that Draco (in a way) has accepted him. There'll be rough spots, of course, but he'll be there. Putting in the lyrics is one of my favorite things to do for this story, I'm sorry you don't like them. I hope you still continue to read, though, and thank you for giving your opinion :)
~*I am soulless and proud*~
"Go cover that up, will you? Don't want any", I narrow my eyes at the frail woman before me, "annoying questions, do we?"
Narcissa puts a hand to the bruise around her eye and stares at the floor, "Of course not, Lucius, I'll take care of it".
She quickly exits the room, running from me... damn, I love that. The power, the control, it's like a drug. After the first taste, you thirst for more. It's how I came to be the strong man I am today. Starting all with Voldemort, starting with becoming a deatheater. The best choice in my life, it has secured my future. I am in the Dark Lord's inner circle, trusted above all others. With one word, I can destroy someone, kill them... make them wish I would. All their lives are a game, disposable.
~*That I'm not like your kind*~
We need to get rid of the weak if we're going to take over like we truly want to. That means getting rid of those worthless muggles and mudbloods. Not to mention muggle-lovers, those worthless excuses for wizards. A snarl forms on my face as the biggest one of all comes to mind: Dumbledore. He is a disgrace, a crazy old man who everyone, for some reason, places their trust in. For Merlin's sake, he lets mudbloods in, keeps that half giant as a teacher, allows that werewolf to stay, and worships the Potter brat!
Potter. The name leaves a sour taste in my mouth. So many times that boy has come within inches of death, why isn't he gone yet?! Older, stronger, wizards than him have perished in front of Voldemort, yet he still stands with but a scar! The Lord isn't very pleased about being beaten by a child so much, either, as we deatheaters can attest to.
I relax and take a sip of wine, permitting a smile to form, The-Boy-Who-Unfortunately-Lived's lifeline is growing shorter as we grow stronger. Now that Voldemort's finally getting rid of that little rat, Peter, we're one step closer to our goal. It is up to Draco now...
My grip on the wine glass tightens as my son comes to mind. I've been ashamed of him for as long as I can remember. Even when he was a child, always whimpering and running to his mother. The smile broadens as I remember, he learned quick enough. He used to cry at all of his punishments, it was disgusting. Men, especially Malfoy men, do not cry. He learned that fast as well.
~*I delight in watching you
drown
As this world drags you down*~
When was the first time I used the Cruciatus? I search my memory... I believe it was when he was around nine. Fury rises as I recall why I did it. The boy was, it sickens me even now, he was playing with a muggle. I came home from work and saw him there, out in the open, as if he wasn't doing something shameful. I yearned to use my wand, but showing magic in front of the muggle wouldn't have been prudent, my Lord wasn't even back in power yet then. So, instead, I grabbed his arm and threw him to the side, before angrily telling that dirty muggle to leave, now. I don't believe I've ever seen anyone run as fast as that little boy.... then I turned to Draco...
~*Down
Shine darkest star*~
~~~~~~He looked up at me fearfully, massaging his arm, and tried to speak, "Father, I-"
"I don't want your excuses!" I spat, "Inside, at once!"
Draco raced inside and started up the stairs for his room before I called him, "Get over here, boy."
Reluctantly, he returned and hung his head, "Yes, Father."
~*Snake bone chain
Hugs your neck*~
I slapped him, "Look at me", he raised his head and rubbed his reddened cheek, "Just what in the hell were you doing?"
"I was just playing with-"
Another blow cut him off and I raised my voice, "With a MUGGLE!" I saw the tears then, he was trying to conceal them, but was failing horribly. Yet another thing he couldn't do, "Are you crying, Draco?"
~*Matters not
Your curse awaits*~
"No, sir".
That time, the smack caused him to almost fall, "Don't lie to me!"
"I'm sorry, sir."
"Can you even begin to imagine how worthless you are, child?", I ranted, "You should want to hex that muggle, not play with him! Have I taught you nothing, or are you just too stupid to absorb it?! I need an heir, Draco, not a sniveling mess! Actions like this won't be tolerated!"
That's when the dread in his eyes intensified, as he tried to think of what punishment he would get, I could tell. I could tell, and I relished it. It was his fault the Malfoy name was going to be torn to shreds, I knew he wasn't tough enough to be who he needed to be.
He would never guess this punishment, however, for he had never experienced it before. I decided he would then, in all its glory. I pulled out my wand.
Draco eyed it warily, "What are you going to do?"
~*When you see me, stand aside*~
Very softly, I said, "Son, do you, by chance, remember those Unforgivables I told you about?"
He gulped and nodded.
"Name them and their effects for me".
"T-the-"
I struck him, "Without stuttering".
He bit his lip, "Sorry sir. There's the Imperious Curse, which makes the person under it do whatever the curser tells them to do. The Avada Kadavra, that's instant death. And the", he looked closely at me and whispered, "the Cruciatus, it inflicts extreme pain on the cursed, if prolonged, it can cause death, or insanity. The perfect torture curse."
"Very good, maybe you do listen sometimes. Now, what are the spells for them?"
He bit his lip harder, "Imperio, Avada Kadavra, and", he's silent a moment, "Crucio".
~*If I call you, pray to hide*~
I said the last one with him, wand pointed, and he dropped to the floor. His limbs twisted in unnatural ways and his young face contorted in pain. At first, he focused on breathing, but then looked at me and choked out, in a pleading voice, "Father!"
I didn't let it go long, he was too young and it may have killed him. When he next glanced at me, his eyes were full of pain...and betrayal. I laughed, what did he expect from me? He was merely my means to an end.
Narcissa ran in then, "Draco! What happened?"
He almost answered, but thought better and looked to me. I gazed at him casually, "Go to your room, Draco".
It was amusing to see him try to get to his feet, falling a couple times in the process and dragging himself to the stairs. When he was far enough away, I turned to my wife, "Were you aware that your son was playing with a muggle?!"
She begun to wring her hands, god how I love the fear, "I didn't think it would hurt anything, Lucius."
"Didn't think it would hurt anything?! We are Malfoy's, one of the oldest, purest bloodlines, we do not associate with muggles!" I put my wand away, it was more enjoyable to deal with her without spells...~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The memory makes me laugh, and I hear a house elf scuttle away in fright. Some would call me a monster, I suppose...some have, as a matter of fact. Something about torturing ones own son. The spineless say it. I never punish the boy without reason, he has no one to blame but himself. Is it my fault he's a complete moron? What is necessary for the advancement of the true wizards of the world must be done, that is where my loyalties lie. Besides, he's never given me any reason to be proud and never will.
However, he is necessary both as my heir and to Voldemort, so I have done my best to prepare him. There have been points I had just hoped the Lord would order me to kill Draco and be done with it... He's done it before to other deatheaters, to prove their loyalty. Hell, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, that will never happen now, as He has chosen Draco. That thought reminds me of that worthless child's response to the honor. How dare he attempt to defy me, to defy our Lord.
~*Can you offer your last breath*~
"Then why didn't he choose you?" The boy's words come to mind and I almost break the glass. It should've been me, after all I've done for Voldemort, I should be the one promoted to that spot. Another thing that child has ruined.
Much as I like to ignore it, the outburst worries me a bit, I can't afford anymore like them. Draco will have to be monitored constantly, luckily we have Severus at the castle. The boy must be dealt with harshly from now on if he is to do what is expected of him. The training sessions should provide that, glee breaks out inside of me as I think of them. Oh, the plans I have...
~*Smile of blood, lips of death*~
I managed to make it so that Draco will be coming to the manor every other weekend, it was the most I could get out of that interfering idiot, Dumbledore. I think he suspects something, but can't put his finger on it. It makes me laugh, the "great" Dumbledore has no idea his destruction is at hand.
~*Down
Shine darkest star*~
I have desired that for so long, have wanted to rid the world of all those he protects. I need it like Voldemort needed Potter's blood, like he needed his own father's. The smile returns to my face as I see a similarity between the Lord and myself: he needed his father's blood and I will use my son's...
~*Without light, I am*~
A/N I hope that didn't suck too badly. I was really disappointed with it, I thought I was going to like writing it more. I already have Narcissa's song picked out and I really want to do her chapter. Would you guys mind if hers was next? Or do you want a break between the two and have a glimpse into what Draco's doing? If Narcissa's is next, I'll have it pick up from when Lucius orders her cover up the bruise in this chapter. If not... I'll start it somewhere, lol. Ok, please review :)