God's in 7th Heaven, All's Right with the World

By Cypher

Chapter Twenty-Three: Carnal Urges

"I love you to the point it breaks me. No kind of words are enough, because I also have a love, that I can never give voice to."

"You know, if you're not careful, he's going to be swamped by the girls drooling over his voice." Lucy glanced at her watch.

Simon snatched one of his sister's fries. "You're just jealous I have a boyfriend that can sing."

Lucy chuckled and sipped her soda. "I'm glad you and Terry asked us to come. It's good to give Kevin and him more time together."

Simon sighed and leaned back in his seat. "Karaoke night at the Pool Hall wasn't my idea. I thought Kevin would feel more comfortable playing miniature golf or something."

"It's not you he has to get used to anymore. I mean, he doesn't seem to mind that you're gay."

"I know, but he still doesn't like Terry. Though the Christmas gift bought him some points, I think."

Lucy shook her head. "I can't believe he spent that much money on us." She looked towards the stage again. "He really does have a nice voice."

"Yeah..."

"The setting sun sinks again, as it embraced its passion, it reaches its inward rest, even though it's painful...always."

Simon clapped as the music died down.

"Have you told him you have a pretty good voice?"

Simon shook his head. "Compared to his, it's not so great."

"I'm sure he'd love to hear it, though. He loves everything about you."
"Still..."

"Still what?" Terry took a seat by Simon and poured himself a glass of water. "What're we talking about?"

"Just talking." Simon rested his arms on the table. "You did great."

"I just wish there was a real karaoke bar around here. Man, Jordon and I used to have some wild parties renting out one of those rooms." Terry gulped down the liquid. "Listen, I'm going to step outside for a minute, get some air. I'll be back in a few, okay?"

"Yeah, no problem."

Lucy touched Terry's wrist. "Did you see where Kevin went? I haven't seen him for a few minutes."

"I'll check the men's room on my way back."

"Thanks." Lucy turned back to the remains of her food as Terry walked off.

Simon watched him leave, feeling a twinge of jealously as one of the girls got a little close to his boyfriend. Calm down, calm down. He's a model, it's only natural they're attracted to him. You are. You know he'd never cheat on you. He noticed his sister scanning the room for her future fiancé. I'm becoming as insecure as Lucy. Maybe we shouldn't hang out with her so much...

~*()*~

Terry crossed his arms and looked at the night sky. I wonder how aniki's doing. He hasn't called in two weeks. Granted, he must be busy, but so busy he can't even spare five minutes to call and say hi? He sighed. I didn't realize how much I'd miss him. At first it wasn't so bad, but missing Christmas... He watched a car drive by. Guess I should get used to it. From what I know, he's not going to leave Japan when he graduates.

"Hey, what're you doing outside?"

Terry shook his thoughts clear and looked to his right. "I could say the same to you, Kevin."

Kevin rested against the wall. "Needed some air."

"Me too." Terry leaned against the wall as well. "Lucy's looking for you."

"I figured."

Terry turned his head slightly. "You sound like you have something on your mind."

"Why'd you give me a gift?"

Terry blinked. "The spirit of giving. Besides, you're going to be a Camden soon enough. You're a friend."

Kevin crossed his arms and rested his head against the wall. "I don't consider you a friend."

"You are the man Lucy has her heart on. She's my best friend. Ergo, you and I need to be at least buddies."

Kevin pursed his lips.

"I'm making an effort, Kevin. Lucy wishes you would as well."

Kevin remained silent for a moment. "How good are you at shopping for rings?"

Terry raised an eyebrow. "Engagement rings?"

"Perhaps."

"Pretty good. The aunt who sent the big check to the church is an a jeweler's widow, so I've learned a few things over the years."

"Jeweler's widow?"
"She married some miner of precious gems in Africa, he died, and she inherited. Since then, she's been running his business. She's never even left the country since then. We've never seen her."

"Does Simon know this?"

"Not many people know it. I planned on telling him eventually."

Kevin rubbed his chin.

Terry looked at his watch and pushed away from the wall. "We should be heading back in."

"Fine, fine." Kevin walked towards the entrance. "We'll talk."

Terry nodded. "You know where to reach me."

~*()*~

"Wow...so she's running a business all by herself? Isn't it difficult to run something like that alone?"

Terry shrugged. "I've never met her in person, so I have no idea. It doesn't seem that way in the letters we exchange. It must be pretty busy, though. She's never once flown out here, or called."

Simon nodded. "Your family...wow. Just when I thought it couldn't get any...more surprising."

Terry chuckled. "I guess I'm just used to it." He put his arm around Simon's shoulder and looked around the living room. "So, how're your grandparents?"

Simon groaned. "You would bring that up."

"It's been over a month. They should be a little used to it."

"Aunt Julie and Uncle Hank are okay with it. The Colonel..." Simon rubbed his temple. "He's still upset. Grandma Ruth isn't as upset, but she's still a little bit."

"Well, now the big question: when do we come out to the community?"

Simon rubbed his leg against Terry's. "I don't know. Dad isn't back at the church, so we have to ask Chandler to do the sermon."

"Eric will understand."

"I'm just afraid that since it's not dad, they won't be as...accepting as they would be if he was there."

"That's just something we'll have to risk. We failed to come out last year, let's start off this year on the right foot."

Simon nodded. "Alright."

Terry kissed Simon's forehead. "I've got to get going. Some new company is coming to the studio to decide if they want to use us, and the photographer wants me there to model."

"Go, go. I'll see you next week."

"That you will." Terry kissed Simon for another minute, then got up and left.

Simon rested his head on the back of the couch. Coming out to the community. This is going to be big. His nostrils flared a moment. Terry's scent. I wonder if noticed the new after shave I was trying. He turned slightly red. And every time I think of his scent, I remember that one rainy afternoon. I wonder what would've happened...if Jordon hadn't stopped us. He looked towards the door. Would he...have continued? Would I have? Stretching, he stood and headed for the stairs. And I really shouldn't be thinking this before bed. He laughed softly. Then again, what's the harm in thinking.

~*()*~

Simon panted, his chest heaving. Terry's warm breath was against his neck, and his moist body was pressed against Simon's. Simon could feel Terry run his hands down his sides, pausing every so slightly above his waist, before working their way back up.

Oh God... Simon's breath caught in his throat, and he leaned up, entangling his fingers in Terry's hair as he ravaged his lover's mouth. Terry responded in kind, not holding back in any way. Simon pushed his lithe form closer to Terry's, beckoning him. Do it. I'm ready. Just-

"DO IT!" Simon's eyes snapped open and he panted, looking around frantically. Terry...where'd Terry go? He closed his eyes and fell back when he realized the truth. A dream. One of the most...sensual dreams I've ever had. Feeling the stiffness between his legs, he closed his eyes and tried to calm his racing heart. The images, unlike normal dreams, were still in his mind, and they weren't helping him relieve the pressure he was feeling. Shower. A cold shower. Now.

Staggering out of bed, he put on a bathrobe and ran down to the bathroom. It was still early, and fortunately, no one had heard his strangled yell when he had awakened. Calm down. It was just a dream...just a dream...oh God, but what a dream. He found his hands tracing where Terry's fingers had stroked his sides. I have to stop dreaming this. It's Tuesday and I'm still having the same dream. I never should've wondered what could have happened between Terry and I...I haven't been able to look Terry in the eyes, much less get a full night's rest in three days. He shivered under the icy water. Oh God, what a dream. I have to stop this, I have to. But who could I ask about this? And within the next few days?

~*()*~

"I hate this new company."

"Oh you say that about every new company that makes you do pre-dawn shoots."

Terry pulled on a pair of jeans and grumbled. "What do you want, Susan."

Susan, a female model that had taken Amber's place in coed shoots, crossed her arms and leaned against the door frame. Her blond hair was pulled back in a bun, and her blue eyes looked over Terry's still bare chest. "Are you sure I couldn't change you?"

"I'm happily dating my boyfriend. Our relationship is simply platonic. We work together."

"You and Amber were closer."

"I knew Amber for half a decade. I've known you ten months."

Susan waved her hand. "Details, details. Have you heard about this year's announcements?"

Terry shook his head and rested his foot on a chair, lacing up his shoe. "No, did you get picked again? That would make it three years in a row."

Susan shook her head. "Not this year. Amber did."

"Amber's in Tokyo."

"That's one reason they're doing her. Brains and looks."

Terry smirked. "And you're lacking one of those and that's why they didn't pick you?"

"Probably." Susan blinked. "Hey!" She shoved him over.

Terry laughed and sat up. "You walked right into that one."

Crossing her arms, Susan huffed. "That was a low blow."

"You set yourself up for it."

Susan brushed a stray strand of hair out of her face. "Still, you didn't have to take the shot."

"My mom taught me to always take openings." Terry stood and grabbed his other shoe. "So who else? You wouldn't have come just to tell me just Amber got picked. She would've called me eventually."

"How true." Susan waited a few minutes.

Terry finished with his shoes and grabbed a shirt. "So? Are you going to make me guess?" He began pulling the shirt on.

"You, oddly enough."

Terry jerked the shirt down and tucked it into his pants. "Me? The one year I don't need the publicity, they choose me?"

"Murphy's Law. It's for the best. You get great publicity, and you and your boyfriend have been wanting to tell the community about going out."

"Through the daily news was not the way we pictured it." Terry glanced at his waist as he put a belt on.

"Ah, think of it as a Bhuddist gift. Everyone will know and the burden will be lifted off your shoulders."

Terry nodded and grabbed his bag. "Maybe. I'll have to talk to Simon about it."

"Just think it over." Susan turned to leave. "Congratulations, by the way."

"Yeah, thanks." He watched her leave, then looked through his book bag. Coming out to the community via the media. Well, it'd get word out faster than through the church. Maybe Susan's right. We should think of this as a gift.

~*()*~

Matt looked over at the phone. Who'd be calling at eight on a Thursday morning?

Sarah sigh was heard from the bedroom. "Probably the hospital asking if you can work a shift for someone else."

"Joy." Matt set his physiology textbook on the coffee table and picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Matt? It's Simon."

Matt smiled. "Hey, how's it going?"

"Okay, kind of. Look, I have a problem, and I need your advice."

Matt blinked and sat back. He's calling me for advice? Not going to dad, Robbie, or Kevin? This must be big. "Alright, shoot."

"Well, um, have you ever had the same dream over and over, and you could never really get rid of the images, and it was starting to bother you?"

"I guess. I'm not quite sure I understand. Why would the same dream matter unless it was a nightmare?" Matt shifted his position and leaned back on the couch.

Simon sighed. "Matt, when you were a teenager, did you ever dream that you and a girl were, you know..."

Matt frowned. "You're not gay?"

"No! I'm dreaming of Terry, okay?! I'm having these very vivid dreams where he and I-"

"Woah, woah! I don't want to hear about that."

"Then stop being dense and help me! Nothing I'm doing is helping to...to calm me down!"

Matt tried to shake the disturbing images Simon had managed to plant in his mind. "Where are you?"

"Sitting in the tub filled with very cold water. It's not helping. I've even tried picturing mom and dad together, cause that usually does it, but it's not working this morning. We have a holiday and we're going out to breakfast, and Terry's going to be here soon!"

Sarah stuck her head out of the bedroom and raised an eyebrow at her husband.

"Alright, just calm down." Matt waved at his wife and covered the receiver. "It's Simon. Just a small crisis."

"Ah." Sarah ducked back into the bedroom and went back to flipping through her anatomy book.

"First, stop thinking about it."

"Easier said than done. Remember? Mom and dad aren't working."

"What about if you pictured something worse? That should work."

"What could be worse than mom and dad?"

"The Colonel and Ruth. Grandma and Grandpa. Aunt Julie-"

"I get it! I get it! And I think you fixed it. For a long time."

"Glad to be of service."

"I'll call you later."

"You'd better. I want to talk to you at length about this feeling of yours."

"Yeah, yeah."

Matt hung up the phone and shook his head. He's growing up way too fast.

"What's wrong with Simon?"

"He's a teenager. Just needed some advice from an older brother who's gone through some of the same things he has." Though in a slightly different way, and certainly never as intense.

"It's sweet you two have such a close bond, even after you found out the truth about him."

"Yeah." Although, when it's something like this, I kinda wish he was closer to dad.

~*()*~

"Hey Annie. Hey little guys." Terry smiled down at the twins and set his helmet aside. "I'm not too early, am I?"

Annie shook her head and set two glasses of juice in front of her sons. "Not at all. Simon's been up since early this morning. Guess he's excited about going out."

Terry chuckled and pulled off his jacket. "A day off from school is a day off from school. Though I still have some work."

"That's why you're going to brunch, I know."

Terry raised an eyebrow. "You've been talking with Ruthie or Lucy."

"Lucy." Annie wiped her hands and went back to preparing breakfast for the other Camdens.

Terry shook his head. "I've got to stop telling her everything." He sat at the counter and watched the twins. "How's Eric holding up?"

Annie gave Terry a strained smile. "He's...doing fine."

"Still not back at the ministry, huh?"

She sighed. "No, and no hint of it yet."

"Well, look at the bright side."

"There's a bright side?"

"A lot of men experiencing a mid-life crisis decide to abandon their marriage for some young, sexy girl. Eric's only going through an identity and spiritual crisis. He's strong enough that it'll resolve, one way or another."

"Well, I guess there's that fact." Annie wiped a pan with a paper towel. "Can't he just move a little faster, though? We all know he's going back to the ministry."

"We may know it, but Eric has to discover it for himself, and that's no easy task." Terry rubbed his chin. "It's kind of what Simon went through to realize he was gay. It took time, a lot of patience, and a great deal of soul searching. The end result was rewarding, to himself and to me. He felt better, more confident about who he was. We need to give Eric a chance to do that."

"He's been doing it for nearly four months! Really, how long does it take?"

"It took so little time for Simon because I was there to help him. Eric has nobody, just the support of his family and friends. It's harder to find yourself alone than with someone who's made the journey before."

Annie set the pan down forcefully. "I've given him all the support I think I can give! Would you stop taking his side and tell me what I'm supposed to do?"

Terry sighed and rubbed his forehead. I feel a headache coming on. "Annie, sometimes it's not always about you."

"Well, I need some support too! Where am I supposed to go, huh? My husband is the problem, so I can't go to him-"

"Didn't he support you during your transition through menopause?"

Annie blinked. "Yes, but what has that got to do with-"

"This is his menopause. He did his best for you, and I'm sure he felt like you a ton of times, and just had to ride it out."

Annie opened her mouth, then shut it again. Finally she turned back to the stove and went back to cooking.

Well, the headache's vanishing. No wonder Simon always wants to get out of the house. The tension is thick enough to cut with a katana. He unbuttoned the top of his shirt and sat back, closing his eyes. I'll have to bring that up over breakfast, see how he's feeling about everything that's going on around here.

"Terry, look out!"

Terry's eyes snapped open in time to feel his shirt get soaked by a sticky citric liquid. He jumped off the stool and backed up.

Annie tossed him a towel. "I'm sorry. The boys usually aren't so clumsy." She gave Sam a stern look.

Terry waved his hand and unbuttoned the shirt completely. "Accidents happen. I once hit an Egyptian diplomat with a bowl of dip. If he could forgive a kid and not turn it into an international incident, I can forgive Sam." He pulled his shirt off. "Can I throw this in the wash? I have a spare in one of my bags."

"Sure. I think it's clear." Annie wiped up the rest of the mess created by Sam.

Terry opened the washer and started it up.

Simon stepped out of the stairwell and looked at his mother. "Has Terry come yet?" I didn't mean to chat with Matt so long, but I know that I can handle anything that happens. The dream won't bother me at all today.

"Hey, Simon." Terry closed the washer and stepped out from behind the wall. "You'll have to give me a minute. I need to get another shirt."

Simon swallowed as images of his dream, images of Terry's bare form, returned to the forefront of his mind. No! Go away! Despite his protests, the mental images remained. Damn it...after I had gotten rid of them so well, too. Why'd he have to show up without a shirt? "I, um, have to make a quick phone call, anyway."

"Kay. I'll be back in a moment." Terry nodded at Annie and headed out the back door.

Annie faced her son. "Who do you have to call?"

"Just...a friend." Simon raced back up the stairs to his room. Closing his door, he searched his room until he found the phone. Hitting redial, he glanced out his window. He spotted Terry off to the corner, pulling out a white tee-shirt from one of the bike's saddle bags. I was so close, too. Why does he have to have such a great body.

"Hello?"

"Sarah? It's Simon. I need to talk to Matt again. Quickly."

"I'm afraid you just missed him. He went out to buy some milk." Sarah hesitated. "Do you want to talk to me about it?"

"No, no." Simon's shoulders slumped. "Just...tell him I called and I'll try again later."

"Alright. Good bye."

"Bye." Simon hung up and closed his eyes. Think cold thoughts. Grandma and grandpa. The Colonel and Ruth. Mom and dad. He felt his heart slow down, and opened his eyes. Disturbing...but they work. He took a deep breath and headed downstairs.

Terry was waiting by the oven. He had put his jacket back on and held his helmet in one hand. He smiled when he saw Simon. "Hey, did you reach your friend?"

"No. He wasn't home."

"I'm sorry. So," Terry glanced at his watch, "ready to grab a quick breakfast?"

"Yeah, I guess-" Simon looked at the counter as the phone rang. As Annie was dealing with breakfast, he picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Simon? It's Matt I just got back and Sarah said it sounded urgent."

Simon bit his lip. "Um,"

"Well? What is it?"

Terry patted Simon on the shoulder. "If you need to take it, take it. We'll just reschedule for tonight, okay?"

Simon covered the mouthpiece. "You sure?"

"It's obvious this call's important." Terry kissed Simon. "Catch you tonight." He put his helmet on and left out the back door.

Simon stood there a moment, then remembered he was in the kitchen, a place he definitely didn't want to have this conversation. "You said we needed to talk about this. I need to talk about it now." He hurried back up the stairs again.

Annie frowned. "Your brother's up to something. And it's not something good."

Sam looked at David, who nodded. "Simon's not good."

~*()*~

Simon hung up the phone and rested back on his bed. I really needed that talk with Matt. He understands what I'm going through, though I could've done without the don't have sex speech, again. He put his hands behind his head. I hope Terry wasn't too put off. I did want to go to brunch, but if I couldn't control myself... He shook his head, not wanting to complete that thought.

I'd better say something to mom, before she suspects what's going on. Getting up, Simon headed down the stairs to the kitchen. He found his mother getting ready to leave.

"Simon, good. I need you to watch the boys. They're in the living room."

"Yeah, no problem." He headed for the door, but paused before passing through it. "About earlier,"

Annie looked up from her purse. "You should be apologizing to Terry, not me." She stood a little taller. "What was that call about, anyway?"

"Just...Matt. Matt and I really needed to talk about something, and since it was long distance..."

Annie watched her son. Partial truth. I'll get the rest later. "Fine. I should back in an hour or two."

Simon nodded and walked towards the living room. I hate to lie, but it's something I can only talk with Matt about. I mean, who else could I talk to about my feelings, these feelings?

"Hi, Simon."

"Yeah, hi."

Simon paused and looked at David and Sam. Naw...

~*()*~

"So where is this guy?" A man with a camera glanced up and down the street.

"You know models. They're always late." Another man dropped his cigarette and put it out beneath his foot. "Think they have all the time in the world."

"Wait, I think that's him now." The cameraman lifted his camera and took a couple photos as a teen pulled the motorcycle into the driveway.

Terry pulled off his helmet and held up his hands. "Hey, woah, enough already." He got off the bike and frowned. "Did you have to wait outside my house?"

"Dax Jordon, right?"

Terry rolled his eyes and headed for the door. "Of course. Look, give me five minutes to change."

"No, no, we want you in your natural state." The man pulled out a notepad and pen. "Name's Craig, by the way. And the cameraman is Jeff."

Terry shrugged and opened the door. "Let me put on a real shirt. My other one had orange juice spilled on it. Get comfortable on the couch," he faced the two reporters, "and only the couch. I know how you guys think."

Craig nodded. "Sure, no problem."

Terry shook his head and headed for his bedroom. I hate dealing with reporters. Ironic, considering my mother is one. He put on an evergreen turtleneck and went back out to the living room, taking a seat on the other couch.

Jeff took a few pictures, while Craig examined the room. "So you live here alone?"

"Pretty much."

"And how old are you?"

"Eighteen."

"Ah." Craig nodded at Jeff as he sat down. "So..."

"So can I ask a question off the record?"

"Sure."

"Why pick me?"

Craig blinked. "Pardon?"

"Why me?"

"You're one of the sexiest, and most successful, models. Why shouldn't you be picked."

"Because I said I didn't want to be earlier this year."

Craig coughed. "Yes, well, we thought that was a request, not a demand."

Terry ran a hand through his hair. "Just ask your questions."

"Well, where's your family?"

"Mom's an international reporter, so this week I think she's in Russia. My father died in the September eleventh attacks."

"I'm sorry."

Terry sighed. "Yeah, and my brother moved to Tokyo."

Craig noticed a picture on the wall. "Is that him?"

Terry glanced over his shoulder. "Yeah. Bruce Jordon."

"Why's he in Japan?"

"He's attending Tokyo University for grad school."

"Is he married?"

"No. He just got dumped, actually."

"I see." Craig made a note on his paper. "So what about you?"

Terry raised an eyebrow. "I'm attending high school still."

"I meant romantically. There are quite a few rumors going around."

"What sort of rumors?"

Craig and Jeff exchanged glances. "Well, for starters, you've never had a girlfriend."

Terry nodded slowly. "True." He folded his hands together.

"And that you're gay."

Terry frowned a moment. I guess I should tell them the truth. If I lie, it'll create a whole mess. Besides, Simon and I need to come out, and Susan's right. It's like a Bhuddist gift. "I guess it's time the truth came out. Yes, I am. Very comfortably and happily gay."

Craig's eyebrows raised. "Really?"

"Yes, really. Next question."

"Well, do you have a boyfriend?"

Terry thought for a moment. "Yes."

Craig waited. "How about a name?"

"You're a reporter. If you're anything like my mom, you already have someone in mind."

I hate people from reporter families. "Very well." Craig flipped back some pages in his notepad. "According to my sources, you've been seen around town with a blond teen, one year behind you, goes by the name of...Camden. Simon Camden."

Terry bit his lip. You admitted this much. Don't start lying now. Simon can take it. We can handle this. "Well, you get the exclusive of the year. Yeah, Simon's my boyfriend." He waved at finger at Craig. "You harass and hound him, though, and I will make sure you won't work on a newspaper for a very, very long time."

"May we ask him a few questions at least."

"Another day." After I've talked to him tonight. Here's hoping he's not too upset.

"So how is it going? Have you slept with him yet?"

"Excuse me?" Terry crossed his arms and straightened his back. "One, that's really none of your concern, and two, no, of course I haven't. What sort of sick, twisted mind do you have?"

Craig held up his hands. "Hey, I just ask what they want to know. Don't shoot the messenger."

"Oh you don't have to worry about that. I only kill messengers with swift hand attacks or knives."

Craig scratched his leg. "Eh heh, right. Um, moving on..."

~*()*~

"I'm sorry dinner fell through."

Simon shrugged and scratched his neck. "Mom just really wants me to remain here. In case something comes up."

"I perfectly understand." Terry set his stuff down on the kitchen table. "We could eat here, though we still have time before dinner."

"Yeah."

"So you want to go up to your room to talk?"

"No!" That's all I need. Him going into my room and my bed and all I'll be able to think about is--stop! If you think it you can't look at him! "That is, um, there's no room, so no."

Terry glanced at the back door. "How about the back porch, then?"

Simon nodded. "Good idea." He headed outside. Should be fine out here. Cool air, stars, romantic, but public. I should be fine."

Terry shut the door behind them and sat on the bench.

Simon sat near him and fiddled with his hands. "So..."

"So...you're acting strange. What's bothering you?"

Simon shook his head. "Nothing's bothering me."

Terry furrowed his brow a moment, scanning over Simon's body. Then he leaned forward until his face was an inch from Simon's. "Increased heart rate, flushed cheeks, erratic breath sounds. Hmm." Terry snapped is fingers. "Your carnal urges are acting up."

Simon pushed Terry back. "You don't have to be clinical about it."

Terry settled back in his seat and chuckled. "It's satisfying to know I can affect you like that, though."

"So am I on some level, but," Simon looked around nervously, "it's keeping me from concentrating. All I can think about is you and...well..."

"What's causing this? It's not just your hormones."

"It's these, really vivid dreams I'm having."

Terry rested a hand on Simon's. "Sexual dreams aren't unusual for teenagers. My brother had at least one a month, and no, don't ask how I know. You don't want to find out."

"They may be natural, but these are haunting me during the day. That can't be natural."

Terry pursed his lips.

"What?"

"Jordon had the same problem once, and mom sat us down to give us a lecture. The problem is, I don't think your mom gave you this lecture, and it's not one I ever felt comfortable talking about, much less telling someone else, especially my boyfriend."

Simon frowned. "What is it?"

Terry glanced around, then took a deep breath. "A lecture on...how to satisfy your sexual needs through onanism."

Simon furrowed his brow, then realized what Terry meant. "She told you how to--gross! That's disturbing, far more than...than..."

Terry nodded. "I know. But she told us that both men and woman need to, especially teenagers, and, well," Terry shuddered, "it was one piece of advice I never liked, and never followed." He looked at Simon. "But if you're feeling this way, maybe..."

"No, no, absolutely not!" Simon rubbed his face. "We're Christians! I can accept the interpretations of homosexuality, but...but that? No, never."

"It was just a thought. It's how my mom suggested dealing with such intense feelings."

"Yeah, well, your mom's a bit out of this world for me."

"Tell me about it."

Simon stared at the window into the house, thinking silently. "The truth is, I don't know how to deal with this. And it's scary, in so many ways."

"I wish I could help, I really do." Terry rubbed Simon's arm. "Maybe I can take your mind off it."

Simon gave Terry a questioning look.

Terry sighed. "I don't know if you ever noticed, but the company I model for tends to do a yearly profile of some models in the paper. It's mostly for publicity to companies looking for models."

Simon nodded. "Yeah, I remember something like that. Five most attractive people, right?"

"They prefer to use the term successful models, as it sounds more dignified, but yes. Well, I got picked."

"Hey, that's great!"

"Yes and no. Mom was a reporter, and one thing you can't do with reporters is lie. So today, when I had an interview and they asked about my romantic life..."

Simon's eyes widened. "You...told them?"

Terry nodded sheepishly. "Well, they had already heard I was gay and had a boyfriend. I just, sort of, confirmed the rumor mill."

Simon groaned. "Did you tell them it was me?"

"They had their suspicions." Terry rubbed Simon's hand. "We meant to come out last year and never did. Think of this as our chance to come out, start this year with complete honesty."

Simon ran a hand through his hair, staring at the bench they were sitting on. "It was bound to happen sooner or later, I guess."

"Are you angry?"

"Not as much as I thought. I'm kinda relieved, actually. I was dreading facing those people in church without dad." Simon leaned back on the bench. "Now I just have to face the community. Oh boy..."

"Hey, I'll be there with you. It'll be okay." Terry bit his lip. "They might call you, for a brief interview."

"I'll keep it short." Simon yawned "I guess all we can do is hope for the best."

"Exactly." Terry glanced at his watch. "I'm not really in the mood for dinner, now."

"I'm not really hungry, anyway." Simon sat up and stretched.

Terry looked at the sky a moment. "Maybe we should split up for a couple days."

Simon looked at his boyfriend. "Split up?"

"Spend some time apart. Maybe that'll help your dreams."

Simon lowered his arms. "Oh...but tomorrow night we were going to-"

"We can reschedule. Let's see if a couple days apart will help you regain your concentration."

Simon rubbed his arm. "Alright."

"Eric left a message that he wanted to talk with me, but I'll see you Sunday, right?"

"Of course."

Terry smiled and kissed Simon on the cheek. "I'll catch you there, then." He stood up.

Simon nodded. "See you." He looked up at the stars.

Terry watched Simon a moment, then went inside.

Simon closed his eyes and let out a slow breath through his nose. Terry's right. A couple days apart is probably all I need, and then we can go back to normal. He sat a few more minutes. I'll ask him when that article comes out on Sunday. I'm going to need to brace myself. We both are...

~*()*~

Simon panted as Terry kissed down his neck. He leaned his head back and moaned softly. "Terry..."

"Simon."

Simon blinked. "Yeah?"

"Simon, wake up!"

Simon felt Terry vanish. "What?"

"Simon, wake up!"

Simon's eyes snapped open, his chest heaving. "What the...dad?"

Eric sat on the edge of Simon's bed. "You alright?"

Simon felt his face turn red. Did I...say any of that dream out loud? "Wh-what are you doing in here?"

"Lucy asked me to check on you. We all heard you moaning, and I came to see if you were okay. Are you sick? Your stomach hurt?"

A little. "It's...I'm not sick, dad."

"You certainly sounded like it. What was that moaning about, then?"

Simon felt his ears burn even more, and he guiltily glanced at his waist.

Eric sighed and rubbed his brow. "So I didn't imagine it. You did call out Terry's name."

Simon looked down. "I didn't mean to awaken anyone."

"I think we should have another talk about sex."

Simon groaned. "Another one?"

"Yes, another one. If you're having wet dreams that are loud enough to awaken your family, we need to talk."

Simon sighed. "And what are you going to tell me that you haven't before, or that Matt hasn't? What do you know of having sexual desires and not being able to fulfill them?"

"One, I'll think of something, and two, I was a teenager once, you know."

"Yeah, I know, and that was a long time ago. You're married now." Simon crossed his arms and met his dad's stern look. "You can't remember what it must be like, and even if you can, you don't know the modern pressures we're under, or what it's like to be in love with a guy. He's a model, dad. If mom were a model, wouldn't you have had the same problem?"

Eric opened his mouth, then shut it, then tilted his head. Annie as a model... He shook his head. Now's not the time to think like that. "I do know a little of the pressures you're under. But if your other siblings could make it without having sex-"

"Matt and Mary never had someone like Terry for a boyfriend."

"Mary had Robbie, and Matt had plenty of girlfriends who could match up against Terry's looks."

Simon's shoulders slumped.

"And you can't compare your mother and I to you and Terry."

Simon fiddled with the sheet, his mouth turning into a firm frown. "So what do you suggest I do, huh? Should I do what Terry's mom suggests and satisfy my needs through masturbation? Should I sleep with ice by the bed? What should I do, dad. I've talked to Terry, I've talked to Matt, I've prayed to God, and nothing is getting rid of these urges, so what the hell do you suggest I do?"

Eric raised his eyebrows.

Simon rolled his eyes. "Heck. What the heck do you suggest I do."

"Well, this is obviously something that's been bothering you for a while."

"More like frustrating me. I've run out of ideas."

"Well, for starters, ignore Terry's mother."

Simon ran a hand through his hair. "I know. Terry said that's what he did too."

Eric nodded. "As for dealing with your...your..." He searched for a word.

"Carnal urges, as Terry put it."

"As for dealing with your carnal urges, you just have to. If it means spending less time with Terry-"

"We're already doing that. I'm not going to see him until Sunday."

Eric nodded. "Did he say how he deals with his urges?"

Simon blinked. "No. Come to think of it, I never asked..."

"Maybe you should. He must have them about you."

Simon rubbed his chin. "Yeah. I didn't even think to ask him." He sighed. "Thanks for listening, dad."

"Hey, I was a teen once too."

Simon rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah."

"Think you can get more sleep? Real sleep?"

"I think so."

"Alright." Eric stood and went to the door, turning off the light. "Good night, Simon."

"Night dad." Simon settled back into his covers and closed his eyes. Sleep...don't think of Terry, just sleep...

~*()*~

~*()*~

~*()*~

Aniki: older brother

Katana: Japanese sword

Author's Prattle: Well, I know I promised to delve into the 'Simon wants to have sex' plot from the 7th Heaven episode "Sunday," but so much is going on that I've run out of room (unless you want a chapter that stretches to, oh, twenty pages or so). So, chapter twenty-four will be the one that coincides with the "Sunday" episode, it'll probably even begin with it. This chapter just sets up for the big sex discussion (not that it's that big). I was afraid it might be short, but then I realized there's another plot twist I can work in for part of it. But enough chit-chat about that.

I'd like to apologize if I offended anyone. For those of you who don't know, "onanism" is a Biblical word for "masturbation" (at least according to Dictionary.com). Considering FF.N administrators and the 7th Heaven genre, I thought it might be a better term. I mean no offense. Also, I have reviewed the guidelines, and though it's borderline, Simon's dreams do fit within the realm of the PG-13 rating. Considering you made it this far reading about a gay relationship, I figured no one would mind, but I'm just putting an apology in for the administrators to let them know I am watching the guidelines. Still, no offense intended.

Disclaimers, disclaimers. I don't own 7th Heaven, it's characters, or settings. They belong to Brenda Hampton and Aaron Spelling. I also don't own the song Terry was singing at the beginning, "Setsunakutemo....Zutto" from "Fushigi Yugi" (owned by Yu Watase). He was singing the english translation, which can be found at Animelyrics.com.

So, next chapter I will definitely be integrating the episode timeline with this one. I hope you've enjoyed this chapter as well. Chat later!