A/N:  Late, again, I swear I'm getting so pissed at myself.  But, I think the block is gone.  I finally realized I was just thinking too much.  Things should get better.  Except, in a week I start school and it's gonna get intense, so it might be kind of slow then.  No matter what, though, I'll never stop the fic.  Anywho, you have Lifehouse to thank for finally getting this chapter out.  I spent most of this chapter listening to it and it kept me going.  Thus, the song for this is "Trying" by Lifehouse.  Speaking of lyrics, I've thought about it and since I'm not the one who reads it, I figured I'd ask you guys: Is there anything I could do to make them easier to distinguish?  Bold or something?  Are they ok as they are?  Any suggestions would be helpful :-)

Rubberduckie713: Of course I'm proud, normal is way overrated :-)  Yay for Hermione.. for now.  But getting through to Draco is a long, and frustrating, job.  *evil grin*  lol, tell me when you think of something.  Pansy Duckie, that was great!!!  I'll see what I can do ;-)

Hermionedastar: Thank you!  No, this isn't slash.  It's going to work up to be Hermione/Draco.

Koolcat: I agree!!  Voldie will never win!  lol, I like your name for him.

Claire: Lots of car trips!!  I understand evil grandmothers, don't worry :-)  Least yours lives in another state ;-)  Woah, you start early!  I don't until Sept 3rd.  Then again, that's late for around here too.  I hope it's going well!!  I was nervous going into 9th too, partly because I was also going into a whole new school.  It's actually a whole lot easier than it seems.  I'm sure you'll do great!!

~~~~"Mum, Father hates me", Draco said sadly.

Narcissa looked down at the 8 year old cradled in her arms, "That's not true".

He nodded vigorously, "Yes it is!  He said so."

"He didn't mean it", his mother lied through her teeth.

Draco trailed a finger along a black and blue mark on his arm, "I shouldn't have been born".

"Never say that!" She said more sharply then she meant to.  He looked up at her in surprise and she softened her tone, "Now, what would I do without you?"

"Good point", his mouth finally curved into the grin she wanted, "At least you love me".

"More than you know", she hugged him, careful not to hurt his bruised body.

"I wish Father did", the little blonde boy said softly before shutting his eyes and drifting into sleep...~~~~~

~*could you let down your hair be transparent for a while
just a little while*~

Draco's hands clenched his sheets tightly as he awoke from the dream.  It was yet another memory he'd thought had fallen to the recesses of his mind.  It was annoying that they kept popping up.  They hurt him, much as he hated to admit it.  And he had long been accustomed to feeling nothing.  It was so much easier. 

~*to see if your human after all*~

His thoughts unwillingly went back to the dream, nightmare, memory.  He couldn't even remember what had mad Lucius so mad that time, if there was anything at all.  All Draco knew was that his father had stormed from the house after the beating and Narcissa had rocked him back and forth until he stopped crying.  She'd healed his bruises after he fell asleep.  The stupidity of his comments made his mouth now twist into a bitter smile.  Wishes didn't do him a hell of a lot of good.  That last one would certainly never come true.  Loving required a heart and Lucius had lost his forever ago.

~*honesty is a hard attribute to find
when we all want to seem like
we've got it all figured out*~

"Do I still have mine?" Draco wondered uneasily.

"Well, if not, you sure cry a lot for someone without one" the voice snuck into his mind.

~*well let me be the first to say that I don't have a clue*~

Even though he'd like to be able to contradict the voice, it was right.  It was as if Snape had broken some kind of dam.  Draco had sat there, hiding his face, and cried his eyes out.  He could tell Snape was beyond uncomfortable.  But, dammit, it was his fault in the first place.  Draco hadn't wanted to talk about.  Just let it fly away, like everything else.  But no, Snape just wouldn't let it go.  Jerk.

Speaking of him... Draco was started to wonder if his professor had undergone some kind of breakdown.  Or maybe he was under a spell.  Because even though Snape had never been cruel to him, he had certainly never had this "let's talk about it" personality.  And there was another thing...

~~~~~Draco had finished with his tears and was trying to get some more rest.  Trying to sort  out the past events, he feigned sleep.  Lupin came back shortly after and he and Snape spoke softly.  Not softly enough, however, for Draco not to hear (and not attentive enough for him not to peek an eye open)...

"How was it?" Lupin asked.

Snape grimaced, "I am not very helpful in these situations".

The other man smiled a little, "Not that again".

"It's true!" Snape protested, "And besides, all I can think about is the many ways I'd like to kill Lucius".  Draco's mouth had opened slightly at that comment.  Realizing it, he snapped it shut, but the shock remained in his mind.

Lupin's smile disappeared, "I knew it would be bad... but I wasn't expecting that".

"Damn him, Draco doesn't deserve this", Snape replied without thinking.

The smile resurfaced, "Becoming attached, Severus?"

The question was met with a glare, "Shut up", his face went serious again, "You want to know the horrible part?" Lupin gestured for him to continue, "That probably wasn't Lucius' worst work".~~~~~~~~

Draco remembered that Lupin's hands had fisted at that and the two men had just stared at each other.  When there was finally movement, Lupin departed again and Snape went into his lab.  Draco was left with the shock of being cared about.

~*I don't have all the answers*~

"I told you so", the voice couldn't help saying.

Now he was finally lying in his own bed.  He'd finally convinced Snape to let him out.  It was Monday and it was agreed Draco could go to the detention that night if he stayed in bed all day.  But it was past noon and Draco was past his toleration point.  He simply could not sit still any longer!  He didn't have time for the paranoia of his teacher.  Thus, the teenager defiantly got up and dressed. 

~*ain't gonna pretend like I do*~

It shouldn't be too difficult, right?  After all, most of the professors and students were in classrooms.  There was Filch to worry about, but that wasn't anything new.  Draco could wander around, wherever he wished.  The freedom sent adrenaline rushing and he was gripped with the need to leave the dorm.  Immediately.

Out of the bedroom, throw the common room, through the picture (which hissed at him), and finally to the corridor.  He took a deep breath, feeling much better now that he wasn't caged. 

~*just trying
to find my way*~

"Where to go", Draco thought to himself, strolling quietly about.  Flying seemed very appealing, but it was too risky, "Damn an invisibility cloak would come in handy right about now", he grumbled.

Going down to the kitchens was an option, food was looking good.  The elves wouldn't tell on him.  Draco started in that direction.

"A student up and about, oh no!" A gleeful voice came from behind him.

~*trying
to find my way the best that I know how*~

Draco scowled and muttered, "Peeves", before turning around.  It was indeed the poltergeist, most unfortunately.  While better than Filch, he still wasn't a pleasant sight, "Don't you have anything better to do?"

Peeves nodded, "Snape's potions".

Draco smirked, "Have fun", and continued on his way.  Luck was not with him, however.  Just as he was nearing the door that would lead to the hallway of food paintings, doors suddenly opened and students poured out.  He quickly wedged himself behind a statue.  Draco listened closely and when all was quiet again, he slowly came out.  His eyes scanned the area around him, good no one...

"Oh come on!" He said out loud when his eyes landed on a certain Gryffindor girl to his far right.

~*well I haven't memorized all of the cute things to say*~

Hermione's eyes were wide, "Hello to you too".

"Why aren't you in class?" 

She raised an eyebrow, "I missed the part where you became a Prefect".

Draco glared at her, Lucius hadn't liked that very much, "Fine.  Then just get lost".

~*but I'm working on it*~

"Whatever you say".

They both began walking to their destinations, each becoming increasingly uneasy when their paths remained the same.  When they reached the door, they turned to each other.

"Where do you think you're going?" Draco demanded.

"Where does it look like?" Hermione retorted.

 "You're not going to the kitchens!"

"Why not?!"

"Because I am!"

"Too bad!"

~*maybe I'll master this art form someday*~

Slytherin and Gryffindor scowled at one another, both too stubborn to budge.  Finally, Hermione sighed, "Let's just both go in, standing here won't do us any good".

He looked ready to argue, but shrugged and walked through the door.

Hermione followed, wondering what was wrong with her.  She felt like banging her head against the wall.  It had been agreed (between herselves) that she would attempt to befriend Draco.  Yet, the second she sees him, the sarcasm goes on full blast.  It was like a reflex.  And he certainly wasn't helping, she glared at his back.  In fact, her mission for today was quite screwed up.  She'd wanted more information out of Dobby, but that couldn't very well happen now.

~*if I quote all the lines off the top of my head

would you believe
that I fully understand all these things I've read*~

"Granger"

His voice pulled her from her thoughts and she looked at him, annoyed, "What?"

Draco pointed to the painting with the ticklish pear and Hermione realized she'd walked right by it.  Face coloring a little, she backtracked till she was next to him, "Well, what are you waiting for?"

~*I'm just trying
to find my way
trying
to find my way*~

He frowned at her, but said nothing as he entered the kitchens.  As soon as Hermione followed, a green blur ran into her.

"Hello Dobby", she laughed.

"Shouldn't Hermione be in class?" Dobby looked confused.

Hermione smiled, "Hagrid had some gulons, but they got in a fight with one another.  He cancelled the class because it was getting a bit dangerous and he needed to separate them".

"Why couldn't she have just told me that?" Draco wondered, annoyed. 

~*trying
to find my way the best that I know how*~

"Think of your tone when you asked", suggested the voice.

"Oh shut up", he answered it as he recalled how hostile he had sounded.  Just then, he noticed that Dobby was staring at him.  He said, "Hello" a bit uncomfortably.  Dobby only nodded.  Draco grit his teeth in frustration, it had always been like this when he saw the elf in the kitchens.  He hadn't ever abused the elves, didn't really see the point, but Dobby still acted terrified around him.

~*well I haven't got it all figured out quite yet but
even if it takes my whole life
to get to where I need to be*~

Hermione coughed, "Erm, what do you have today Dobby?"  The awkward silence following Draco's greeting was getting to her.

The elf shook himself and grinned at her, "Please sit down", he whisked out two stools.  As they were seating themselves, he walked off, soon to return with two full plates and two goblets of pumpkin juice.

"Thank you", Draco and Hermione said at the same time.

Dobby nodded, "Hermione and Draco are welcome", before another elf called his name, "Dobby must work now", and he was gone.

Hermione, meanwhile, was stuck in shock.  Draco Malfoy thanking a house elf?  Not only that, but the one that betrayed his family. 

~*and if I should fall to the bottom of the end
I'll be one step back to you and*~

Added with her most recent discoveries, there were just too many surprises in way too short a time.  Needing to do something other than think, she asked, "Where have you been today?"

Draco looked up from his food, "Professor Snape asked me to do some things".  Which was, technically, true.

"Like recover from your injuries?" She wondered in her mind.  Out loud she replied, "I see.  Will you be there tonight?"

He smirked, "Missing me already?"

~*trying
to find my way*~

"Hardly", she rolled her eyes, "Just wondering if I'll have to do all the work for a third night".  The words were forced out, as she really didn't mind know what he had gone through.  But he couldn't know that yet.

Draco's sharp eyes darkened so little it was almost unnoticeable, but Hermione saw, "Don't worry, Granger, you'll be graced with my presence".

"I'm so glad", was the sarcastic retort.  But, secretly, she was.

~*trying
to find my way*~

A/N: In case anyone was wondering, a gulon is just something I found while searching for something that sounded like Hagrid would have.  It's a lion-hyena mix with the tail of a fox and sharp claws.  Hmm, learn something new everyday.  Please review!!  It makes the voices in my head happy :-D